Saturday: Childfree vs. Childed

[HeyHomie]

Childfree

9:00 Woke up

9:00-9:30 Laid in bed talking to each other

9:30 Made French toast for breakfast

10:15 Took shower together

10:30 Made "off-label" use of the bed

11:30-12:00 Straightened up the house

12:00 Husband went to grocery store to pick up a few things, while wife cooked lunch (mild green chili with Santa Fe peppers)

12:30 Ate lunch

1:00 Husband read newspaper while wife worked on crafts

2:00 Husband went to church for Drama Team practice

4:30 Husband surfed the internet for a while; wife continues working on crafts

5:30 Discussed where to go for supper. Agreed on Indian.

5:45 Began getting dressed for supper.

6:00 - 7:30 Went to favorite Indian restuarant. Had a nice Cabernet Sauvignon.

8:00 Home from supper. Popped 50 First Dates into DVD player.

9:30 - 10:30 Wife read a book. Husband played PlaystationII.

10:30 Went to bed.

Childed

4:30 6-year-old wakes up the entire house when he turns on the TV and channel surfs, looking for cartoons.

4:31-4:39 Husband tries to convince 6-year-old to go back to bed. 6yo is having none of it. Husband gives up and tells him to keep the sound down.

4:40 6yo turns sound back up. Husband and wife cover their ears with pillows.

4:41 2yo wakes up crying because his brother is awake and he isn't.

4:42 Wife sets 2yo next to his brother and tells him to be quiet.

4:42-7:30 Kids watch cartoons. Husband and wife toss and turn, trying to catch some Z's over the noise of the cartoons.

7:30 6yo taps on wife while she's trying to sleep. Says he's hungry.

7:31 Wife begins to scramble some eggs. 2yo demands cereal. 6yo cries because his eggs are too scrambled.

8:00 - 9:45 Husband and wife clean up house, hurting their feet while stepping on toys. Parents try to involve kids in chores; both throw tantrums.

9:45 - 11:05 Wife tries to get both kids to bather. Neither of them are into it. Mom is drenched with water. Spends 20 minutes trying to get 6yo into an outfit that he'll wear.

11:05 Wife showers while husband tries to engage kids in something to do (cartoons are over).

11:15 Husband enters shower. Out of hot water.

12:00 Kids are hungry. Wife makes bologna sandwiches, taking care to cut 2yo's sandwich into bite-sized pieces.

1:00 - 3:30 Weekly grocery shopping. Takes 15 minutes to get both boys into car seats. At store, 6yo wants everything he sees. 2yo loses control at 3:00 because he's overdue for nap, and throws tantrum in store.

3:30 Back at home. Wife tries to put boys down for nap. 2yo fusses and fights until 3:40. 6yo cries that he's too old for a nap. Falls asleep at 3:50

4:00 Both kids awake from their nap. Husband puts in Barney DVD to keep them occupied while he tries to read newspaper. Wife calls every teenager and young woman she knows trying to arrange a babysitter.

5:00 Discuss where to go for supper. Couldn't find a babysitter, so they agree on Chuck E. Cheese.

5:05 - 6:00 Husband and wife get kids cleaned up, dressed, and into their car seats.

6:00 -7:30 Supper at Chuck E. Cheese. 2yo falls asleep before pizza arrives. 6yo cries because parents won't give him more game tokens.

8:00 Arrive home from Chuck E. Cheese. Both kids sound asleep. Husband tries to make "off-label" use of the couch. Wife says kids will hear.

8:30 Husband and wife go to sleep, too exhausted from the day to do anything else.


------

Tell me again what it is I'm missing?

 

[Epoh99]

This is great, I love it.

(Hopefully no parents will come on here saying you're missing the love children bring and the pride in seeing them learn new things, etc. and so forth.)

I have said so much over these past couple of weeks to my husband, "I am so glad we don't have kids." We're in the process of moving and it's hard enough with a dog that won't leave us alone.

 

[JesusWasn'tWhite]

Hahaha.. thanks for that.
Maybe schools should start using the "daily calendar" as a means of preventing teenage pregnancy. None of this "abstinance only" stuff. Scare them into not having kids too early.

 

[fuzzymel]

I love it.

I love my weekend layins. I sleep until I really have to get up. Something I never ever want to give up.

 

[mina]

lol that was funny. I definitely enjoy sleeping in and not dealing with tantrums. And yes this schedule should be mandatory reading for all high schools lol

 

[snoochface]

That was great!

You know what's funny? I read about halfway through the Child day and had to stop. Just reading about life with a child was enough to give me a headache, LOL.

 

[Everlasting33]

I also became exhausted from just one day of activities...and that is with just 2 children, many people have more!! How do they do that??????? ( my pastor has 7)

 

[fuzzymel]

I see so many people with just one child and I dont want the busyness of their lives. More than one seems crazy. How would you get any down time away from them?

 

[Rhododendron]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! Thank you, I needed my daily dose of *the right decision* LOL!

 

[Rebekka]

That was funny. My first thought was: "Boy, does HeyHomie get up early!"

For us, waking up at 9 AM on Saturday is exceptional. We're more of the 11 AM to 2 PM kind. And often stay in bed until 4 PM. Our cats have infected us with their lazy joie de vivre.

Your lunch sounds yummy by the way.

 

[likestocook]

This is great, I love it.

(Hopefully no parents will come on here saying you're missing the love children bring and the pride in seeing them learn new things, etc. and so forth.)

I have said so much over these past couple of weeks to my husband, "I am so glad we don't have kids." We're in the process of moving and it's hard enough with a dog that won't leave us alone.

I'm a parent and that joke just made me laugh. I've had days like that. Personally I wouldn't miss being a parent for the world however the couple that stood up for us at our wedding 17 years ago are childless by choice and loving it. They are still good friends of ours and I very much enjoy getting together with them and doing grown up things.

 

[psalm468]

Makes me glad I don't have kids!

 

[RedheadedPrincess]

Thanks for the great reminder of why I don't have kids right now. Unfortunately my dh and I only have Sunday off together so we can't stay in bed forever as a couple.

 

[Epoh99]

I'm a parent and that joke just made me laugh. I've had days like that. Personally I wouldn't miss being a parent for the world however the couple that stood up for us at our wedding 17 years ago are childless by choice and loving it. They are still good friends of ours and I very much enjoy getting together with them and doing grown up things.

I meant I hope parents don't come on here and comment about HeyHomie's comment, not about the actual joke.

Tell me again what it is I'm missing?

I'm glad your children bring you so much joy. I'm sure you're doing a great job with them. I also thought your comment about getting together and doing "grown up things" was cute.

 

[Oblivious]

LOL - I never thought of us as being "spoiled" but I guess we are.

 

[Million Pieces]

I'm so glad my kids have past 2 and 6 years old.

No one gets up before about 8 here either. The 13 year old makes scrambled eggs with cheese, green onion and red pepper, and toast, while the 11 year old makes fresh orange juice the 7 year old entertains himself on a laptop with headphones, while DH and I turn the radio on LOUDLY and make our own off-label use of the mattress, having never set a foot on the floor.

Babysitter? Please, he sleeps in the bedroom downstairs, he gets to claim his babysitting time for Christian Service at his Christian middle school. Don't even have to pay the boy. Only rotten thing about eating out now is it gets awfully expensive because all but the 7 year old are ordering off the adult menu. *sigh*

 

[overit]

As a great exageration/joke it's funny, but b4 people jump at that as whole truth and believe that this is how it is for everyone and that is why they don't have kids, I can give you an example of a SINGLE PARENT schedule in contrast to the childless Saturday day

I've never had my children get up at 4 am unless they were sick (and they went back to sleep with me) or they were infants. On wknds I haven't had a child ever get up b4 730, typically it's much later and my boys are almost 6 and 7 1/2 ,and I've been doing this solo for over 3yrs now. ANd yes, it was a little more hectic when they're younger, it's all on how you raise them and what you do to help your own sanityI have full custody of the kids, they go to their dads every other wknd, there would be 2 examples.

Somwhere between 730-830 am: Kids get up, they go to their playroom, close the door They know to let mom sleep in on wknds because that is how I taught them.
830-930/10: Kids are playing nicely and I might wake up once and hear them and drift right back off to sleep
Btwn 930-10: Kids go to livingroom when I choose to get up to make bkfst and have coffee, they can get into their own cereal or I can make a big bkfst, whatever our mood is. If they beat me to it (got a yoghurt/banana/cereal) I sometimes go back to bed.
1000-1030: I get up and watch animal planet w/them because I actually LIKE those programs.
1030;-12:00: kids go outside or play video games or we play a boardgame together. If they are doing their own thing or the neighbors kids are there and they're all playing blisfully outside, I get to watch whatever I want on tv, read a book, do laundry or sit around doing nothing or call a friend.
12: lunch, sandwiches or soup or something easy.
Afternoon could be doing nothing, doing chores, or going out to a movie, a park or a drive.
Late afternoon: we can have dinner out, or cook dinner at home, after which we read or freeplay b4 getting ready for bed. ON wknds they are allowed to watch a video in bed, but bedtime is typically 9 on wknds. So I still have several hrs to exercise, or clean or sit watching tv or a netflix movie with a glass of red wine. Talk to some friends on phone or invite them over. Modify this to someties we travel together.

Notice I dropped the time schedule cause it was boring me lol.

Repeat from 830-12 for wknd w/their dad. Except late am I make sure they're dressed and pack a couple things for them and we have extra cuddle time. At noon their off w/dad (unless I chose to travel somewhere and they go to their dads first thing early am). NOW, while the childless couples are stuck with eachother, I get to do whatever I want, whenever I want, with WHOMEVER I want, whichever way I want for an entire 2 days. I can stay home, go out, see friends, go for some drinks w/friends, or take a flight anywhere I want for free for the wknd to NY (I have a friend living there), to Salt lake city (just got back from skiing there), Florida, or whatever my fancy is. I can take a road trip, best of all I don't have a spouse to argue with, to hide receipts from, to exagerrate the low bargain price of a recent purchase or have to concede to where THEY want dinner if I don't feel like it. I get to see what I want on tv, watch whatever movie I want. I don't have to ask if they had plans or coincide schedules or "check" w/my spouse, I do my thing I can go on dates or not. I can have a bf or not. The way I see it, spouses can be more burdensome then kids So as you see, it's not that hectic as the op made it to be (and I'm just one person). AND I also get to experience the joys and feel the intense love and satisfaction that comes with having children, I feel blessed beyond measure with them, I cannot describe that even though you DO have much more respobsility, and it CAN be hard work, (hey so can working on a marriage), to ME they are worth every second of it. SOMEHOW, I even manage a cat and bird, and come end of Feb a puppy. Hmmmmm.....I can be busy, have what others consider "burdensome" responsibilities but I am happy and satisfied with that and the rewards are endless.

Wow, after all this, I feel as a single parent I even have it better then the childless couples do

Oh, yeah, it's meant to be funny too, honest!

 

[Rebekka]

As a great exageration/joke it's funny, but b4 people jump at that as whole truth and believe that this is how it is for everyone and that is why they don't have kids, I can give you an example of a SINGLE PARENT schedule in contrast to the childless Saturday day

I've never had my children get up at 4 am unless they were sick (and they went back to sleep with me) or they were infants. On wknds I haven't had a child ever get up b4 730, typically it's much later and my boys are almost 6 and 7 1/2 ,and I've been doing this solo for over 3yrs now. ANd yes, it was a little more hectic when they're younger, it's all on how you raise them and what you do to help your own sanityI have full custody of the kids, they go to their dads every other wknd, there would be 2 examples.

Somwhere between 730-830 am: Kids get up, they go to their playroom, close the door They know to let mom sleep in on wknds because that is how I taught them.
830-930/10: Kids are playing nicely and I might wake up once and hear them and drift right back off to sleep
Btwn 930-10: Kids go to livingroom when I choose to get up to make bkfst and have coffee, they can get into their own cereal or I can make a big bkfst, whatever our mood is. If they beat me to it (got a yoghurt/banana/cereal) I sometimes go back to bed.
1000-1030: I get up and watch animal planet w/them because I actually LIKE those programs.
1030;-12:00: kids go outside or play video games or we play a boardgame together. If they are doing their own thing or the neighbors kids are there and they're all playing blisfully outside, I get to watch whatever I want on tv, read a book, do laundry or sit around doing nothing or call a friend.
12: lunch, sandwiches or soup or something easy.
Afternoon could be doing nothing, doing chores, or going out to a movie, a park or a drive.
Late afternoon: we can have dinner out, or cook dinner at home, after which we read or freeplay b4 getting ready for bed. ON wknds they are allowed to watch a video in bed, but bedtime is typically 9 on wknds. So I still have several hrs to exercise, or clean or sit watching tv or a netflix movie with a glass of red wine. Talk to some friends on phone or invite them over. Modify this to someties we travel together.

Notice I dropped the time schedule cause it was boring me lol.

Repeat from 830-12 for wknd w/their dad. Except late am I make sure they're dressed and pack a couple things for them and we have extra cuddle time. At noon their off w/dad (unless I chose to travel somewhere and they go to their dads first thing early am). NOW, while the childless couples are stuck with eachother, I get to do whatever I want, whenever I want, with WHOMEVER I want, whichever way I want for an entire 2 days. I can stay home, go out, see friends, go for some drinks w/friends, or take a flight anywhere I want for free for the wknd to NY (I have a friend living there), to Salt lake city (just got back from skiing there), Florida, or whatever my fancy is. I can take a road trip, best of all I don't have a spouse to argue with, to hide receipts from, to exagerrate the low bargain price of a recent purchase or have to concede to where THEY want dinner if I don't feel like it. I get to see what I want on tv, watch whatever movie I want. I don't have to ask if they had plans or coincide schedules or "check" w/my spouse, I do my thing I can go on dates or not. I can have a bf or not. The way I see it, spouses can be more burdensome then kids So as you see, it's not that hectic as the op made it to be (and I'm just one person). AND I also get to experience the joys and feel the intense love and satisfaction that comes with having children, I feel blessed beyond measure with them, I cannot describe that even though you DO have much more respobsility, and it CAN be hard work, (hey so can working on a marriage), to ME they are worth every second of it. SOMEHOW, I even manage a cat and bird, and come end of Feb a puppy. Hmmmmm.....I can be busy, have what others consider "burdensome" responsibilities but I am happy and satisfied with that and the rewards are endless.

Wow, after all this, I feel as a single parent I even have it better then the childless couples do

Oh, yeah, it's meant to be funny too, honest!

Hahaha, your post was funny. Especially the bliss of being a single parent. Hadn't looked at it that way. Thanks for a good laugh, and for typing that all out. I'm way too lazy for that.

Yes, kids are great, if you're a fan. I have the same with cats (and other animals) that parents have with kids: it can be a lot of work (OK, cats are a lot less work than kids, but they can be more destructive because they can't listen to your reasoning), but it's all soooo worth it. I can't imagine my life without them.

That's interesting, to have a bird AND a cat AND (soon) a puppy! How does the cat behave towards the bird? Does he see the bird as prey?

Sometimes I think that my maternal instinct does exist, only not with human babies but with cats and other animals.

It's nice to have well-behaved kids who let you sleep.

 

[overit]

Rebekkah, yes it's nice to sleep in, but yes I had to teach them (just as we train our pets how to behave lol). As for the cat/bird. Well, yes he DOES see the bird as prey and often stares at him, jumps up on the table with tail switching BUT he has never tried to jump up to the cage, he's seen the cage since he was a 3mo old kitten (when we adopted him from the pound). So he's used to our bird. Maybe he's instinctively sort of scared of the bird since my female bird has already mysteriously killed 3 male bird partners so now we leave her solo-it's obvious she doesn't like men lol (that's quite a story for another post hehe).
My cat of course is a laid back 1 yr old beautiful guy, living up to the name Marley, I swear he lights up sometimes he's such a good/mellow cat j/k lol. He sometimes behaves like a dog and enjoys riding in the car and pouncing and running after running children.

Oh and just for clarification, I truly was NOT a child person, and I just LOVED animals, all through childhood/adulthood I always had cats or cats/dogs, birds, even had a piggy once (he was later eaten), a sheep (later eaten) and a chick (he died). I'm an animal freak and just truly enjoy them. I never was into babysitting, nursery at church, etc. I remember a short period of time where I really liked babies when I was about 8-9, but yet I was passionate about pets/animals.

Yeah the puppy leap is crazy I know, I'm taking on more than I can handle everyone says, (we're getting a girl boston terrier). But I know how to raise/train pets and how much work it takes so I"m going in w/eyes wide open. The joy of seeing my kids grow up w/a dog (like I did and I remember the joy the brought to my life) is worth the price. Why would I keep that experience from them when I know how blessed they can be (as was I).

Oh again, yeah, b4 my kids I didn't have that maternal instincts with kids, even now I'm selective and don't just fawn over every single baby born, and yes I sometimes think some kids AREN"T cute.

I don't feel lovey dovey gushy with all children. Mainly just my own, but I HAVE become more fond of children in general since having my own. And I'm absolutely nutso and in love with my boys (and they sometimes drive me nutso in not a good way either lol).

 

[Nikki07]

Haha, great comparison!
Makes you wanna think a little bit more about certain stuff...