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[Erie79]

Hello All,

I feeling very upset and bitter about something I probably should not. I have a good friend that I often confide in and share things about my life. She does the same.

She is a therapist. I recently shared with her that I felt called to become a Christian Counselor. This would involve getting my Masters Degree in counseling(From a Seminary) since my undergraduate is in a different but related field. She discouraged me a bit but then said do it if that is what you feel God is calling you to do.

My friend said that like me, she feels that maybe she should be a Christian Counselor! And she looked up credentials and they varied from having degrees in Bible studies to just having a regular license and a Christian background.

I know I shouldn't feel upset about this as there are many Christian Counselors out there but I cannot help feeling that she is taking something from me.

My friend went on about how she needed to take care of herself, take these Bible classes...etc My upset feeling is mixed with a bit of jealousy because she already has the degree and the career. Why do I feel like she is taking something away from me? Maybe I shouldn't confide in her so much. I know this seems like such a small thing but part of me feels like a bit of my identity and dreams are being taken.

Any advice to get past these feelings?

Thanks,
Erie

 

[LilLamb219]

Do you and your friend often compete in other areas of life?

There is no need for you to be jealous. This might have been on her mind for a while and maybe she was brushing it off until you brought up the topic.

The more Christian Counselors out there...the better! My daughter had some issues as a teenager and it was only when she went to a Christian Counselor that she had the best help ever and could recover!

Many blessings to you and your friend in helping God's children.

Hello All,

I feeling very upset and bitter about something I probably should not. I have a good friend that I often confide in and share things about my life. She does the same.

She is a therapist. I recently shared with her that I felt called to become a Christian Counselor. This would involve getting my Masters Degree in counseling(From a Seminary) since my undergraduate is in a different but related field. She discouraged me a bit but then said do it if that is what you feel God is calling you to do.

My friend said that like me, she feels that maybe she should be a Christian Counselor! And she looked up credentials and they varied from having degrees in Bible studies to just having a regular license and a Christian background.

I know I shouldn't feel upset about this as there are many Christian Counselors out there but I cannot help feeling that she is taking something from me.

My friend went on about how she needed to take care of herself, take these Bible classes...etc My upset feeling is mixed with a bit of jealousy because she already has the degree and the career. Why do I feel like she is taking something away from me? Maybe I shouldn't confide in her so much. I know this seems like such a small thing but part of me feels like a bit of my identity and dreams are being taken.

Any advice to get past these feelings?

Thanks,
Erie

 

[Erie79]

Thanks for your reply! No, she was always a secular counselor(though is a Christian) and never expressed an interest. When I brought it up with her and shared my excitement, she discouraged me and said how draining the work is and how stressed out her work environment is and that she needs a break. She told me it would be years and years before I would be a good therapist...etc She frequently compares herself to her coworkers and others in her field by portraying them a bit negatively. I don't try to be competitive with her. I always offer encouragement and praise. I have not expressed these feelings to her. One other time, she did emulate something that was mine. We do not live near each other.

 

[Erie79]

Now I am being flooded with text messages expressing all of this passion and excitement which never existed before. I did tell her I was a bit surprised by this as she has never mentioned it before. The response I received was that she didn't know there was a program for it and that one must have come along while she was busy "working." Hmmm...

I am all for her taking this path but I find the timing of it strange. After I share with her God's plan for my life, she decides it's for her too and what she has wanted to do all along. This is why I feel upset about it. It does feel like competition. But why?

 

[LilLamb219]

Now I am being flooded with text messages expressing all of this passion and excitement which never existed before. I did tell her I was a bit surprised by this as she has never mentioned it before. The response I received was that she didn't know there was a program for it and that one must have come along while she was busy "working." Hmmm...

I am all for her taking this path but I find the timing of it strange. After I share with her God's plan for my life, she decides it's for her too and what she has wanted to do all along. This is why I feel upset about it. It does feel like competition. But why?

Think of it instead as God putting both of you to good use instead of her stealing away your idea.

 

[Erie79]

I wished her well with it. It was just the timing. I don't like feeling this way, so I will pray about it. Thank you for making me feel petty

 

[BFine]

I think it is neat how God used you to reach her and she responded favorably
by taking the steps to move into the field of Christian counseling.

Thank you for sharing not only what you feel called to do but for getting
her on the right track even though it is hard for you to feel happy for her
due to that competitive nature that many of us have.

Recognize your own area of weakness and work on building up that area.

There's a lot of people who need counseling and although it is hard and can
be trying I believe it will be worth it to help others.

You aren't competing against your friend for a bigger share of the pie, you are
to help make a difference in other people's lives by providing them with
wise counsel...allow the Lord to shine in this situation.

 

[Erie79]

Thank you so much BFine,

Your words touched me. This issue is mine and I'm going to pray for us both. I do think God is using me in her life...thank you for helping me to see it that way

Erie

 

[lvmangione]

A little OT but Bfine, you're very full of wisdom and I love how I can read one of your posts, then see the OP really look at it in a different light. God has blessed you with that.

 

[Reborn1977]

Let me offer you perhaps another spiritual perspective.

Imitation is truly the greatest form of flattery and clearly she believes what you felt led to do was a worthy pursuit.

Secondly, perhaps God used you to speak into this person's life and prompt them to do something that they needed to do.

Either way it takes nothing away from what God is calling you to do. We need all the godly Christian Counselors we can get within the Christian Community to offset some of the evils found within secular psychiatry.

May God bless your pursuit.

 

[Ark100]

Hello All,

I feeling very upset and bitter about something I probably should not. I have a good friend that I often confide in and share things about my life. She does the same.

She is a therapist. I recently shared with her that I felt called to become a Christian Counselor. This would involve getting my Masters Degree in counseling(From a Seminary) since my undergraduate is in a different but related field. She discouraged me a bit but then said do it if that is what you feel God is calling you to do.

My friend said that like me, she feels that maybe she should be a Christian Counselor! And she looked up credentials and they varied from having degrees in Bible studies to just having a regular license and a Christian background.

I know I shouldn't feel upset about this as there are many Christian Counselors out there but I cannot help feeling that she is taking something from me.

My friend went on about how she needed to take care of herself, take these Bible classes...etc My upset feeling is mixed with a bit of jealousy because she already has the degree and the career. Why do I feel like she is taking something away from me? Maybe I shouldn't confide in her so much. I know this seems like such a small thing but part of me feels like a bit of my identity and dreams are being taken.

Any advice to get past these feelings?

Thanks,
Erie

Her discouraging you a bit is the 'off' part. Some people are selfish in that regards. Hey ultimately she gained something from you.

I know this from friends of friends or friends of my own families and random people in everyday life You tell them your desires and ideas, and rather than encourage you, they discourage you and take it as theirs. It happens a lot in big businesses and big corporations.

When life give you lemons, they say you 'make lemonade'.
The fact that she is doing it does not take away what you can do as a person as well. Life is vast, big and opportunities are limitless and endless.

You could start doing the same thing tomorrow and end up speeding past her to the top of your game. Its not about who starts first or how they managed to steal your idea. Its more to do with involving God in everything you do, not allowing people or circumstances weigh you down, and just getting out there and being the best that you can at what you do.

You can do it too, and even much better than she is. It doesnt matter if she started 30yrs ago . Its NOT how far people have come. Its how well. Even the same applies in the Kingdom of God

 

[Erie79]

I want you thank you all for your kindness and understanding. You summed it up perfectly Ark. I was put off by her discouraging words and then a sudden lifelong desire and passion to do this herself. Had my friend gave me some encourage and expressed a desire to also serve God in that way, then I would have felt happy and good about the situation.

I have made peace with it and feel good. It's in God's hands. I offered my friend encouragement and support. After researching qualifications online, she was disappointed and even angry that technically, you do not need a certification and/degree in CC barring where you decide to work. She told me that one of her former co-workers is a CC and that she only has her MAC without the religious background.

I told her her that she do a Bible certification program and not worry about what anyone else is doing, to live up to her own standards.

For me, I am applying to a MAC program at a Theological school. I will also have a cert in Biblical Counseling.

I can say that I am feeling much better. I was feeling emotional and selfish in my own right. Sometimes, just writing my feelings down helps.

Thanks again! )

 

[Ark100]

Goodluck. You will do well. Never give up!