- Nov 21, 2011
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Though Jenny was trying to understand, she couldn't. She knew holding on would be painful. But what she didn't realize that it would be even more painful to just throw away the pic and "pretend" as if Kayly never existed. What mother would not worry about her child? Joshua wondered why his mother was afraid for him. But he understood being that he was suicidal and had to be hospitalized at one point. What parent would not worry that their once suicidal child would not try again? Is Joshua doing better? He seemed to, but deep down, or in the back of her mind, she suspected he is not.
"Joshua, why don't you turn of your computer? Maybe that will help and see how you do. I'm sure you will feel a lot better."
She had no idea that Joshua had such a deep mistrust to the point where he ruminates over a cheating woman all the time. He can't help but to not let go, even though he wanted to. But things really are easier said and done. He hates having these thoughts about women who cheat.
He even wants to hate Kayly, but cannot. He knows how difficult it is, but is ashamed. In the meantime, Carrie was typing on the computer, answering questions other sufferers put up on the forum. OCD suffers' forum. She was the fifth to answer the question about the loneliness
of having OCD. The user asking the question was named LVD_View, who was a new member of the forum.
Carrie answered, "There is a loneliness to having OCD. There is much embarassment and no one seems to understand but you, but there are people who will support you. We are all going through to same thing. I could tell you a lot of advice, but some of it will produce a spike no one
wants, making the cycle even worse. You came to the right place."
As Carrie was typing, she notices the pillow was out of place, but she tries to resist the temptation to just straighten out the pillow. Then she wonders if the keyboard was dirty, so she comes back to clean the computer. Then she worries of the materials she is using is clean.
So she goes to the bathroom and wonders if it was clean since the bathroom has germs. She still knows it is not real, but also knows she cannot reason it out. "God, help me. I believe this letter has produced a
trigger to thoughts that I cannot control. I want to clean but I reason with it, though I know it does not work. Dear God, help me with my anxiety, in the name of Jesus, Amen." Carrie has grown in the Lord since then and wonders if there is a spiritual meaning to it. She sometimes has no idea
why she has this problem with cleaning before. The thoughts eventually go away and so is theneed to seek assurance.
Jenny soon begins to understand what Joshua a going through, at least she tries. "Sweetie, I know you know you loved Kayly, but it is time you need to move on. There are so many wonderful girls that I'm sure you can talk to or meet with. I am worried about you and want for you to get better. No girl is worth this kind of pain. I miss the old Joshua. I know you loved her,
but she did not care. She broke your...."
"Heart? Is that what you about to say? You have no idea what you are going through. Have you
wished this pain would go away! No, you don't! So back off!"
"Just because some girl did you wrong doesn't give you the right to be nasty to your mother!"
"James, please."
"Don't defend him. That girl was not worth your time! She was no good! If she was..."
"Stop it! This is not helping at alll! Joshua needs our help, not our judgement"
"Joshua, why don't you turn of your computer? Maybe that will help and see how you do. I'm sure you will feel a lot better."
She had no idea that Joshua had such a deep mistrust to the point where he ruminates over a cheating woman all the time. He can't help but to not let go, even though he wanted to. But things really are easier said and done. He hates having these thoughts about women who cheat.
He even wants to hate Kayly, but cannot. He knows how difficult it is, but is ashamed. In the meantime, Carrie was typing on the computer, answering questions other sufferers put up on the forum. OCD suffers' forum. She was the fifth to answer the question about the loneliness
of having OCD. The user asking the question was named LVD_View, who was a new member of the forum.
Carrie answered, "There is a loneliness to having OCD. There is much embarassment and no one seems to understand but you, but there are people who will support you. We are all going through to same thing. I could tell you a lot of advice, but some of it will produce a spike no one
wants, making the cycle even worse. You came to the right place."
As Carrie was typing, she notices the pillow was out of place, but she tries to resist the temptation to just straighten out the pillow. Then she wonders if the keyboard was dirty, so she comes back to clean the computer. Then she worries of the materials she is using is clean.
So she goes to the bathroom and wonders if it was clean since the bathroom has germs. She still knows it is not real, but also knows she cannot reason it out. "God, help me. I believe this letter has produced a
trigger to thoughts that I cannot control. I want to clean but I reason with it, though I know it does not work. Dear God, help me with my anxiety, in the name of Jesus, Amen." Carrie has grown in the Lord since then and wonders if there is a spiritual meaning to it. She sometimes has no idea
why she has this problem with cleaning before. The thoughts eventually go away and so is theneed to seek assurance.
Jenny soon begins to understand what Joshua a going through, at least she tries. "Sweetie, I know you know you loved Kayly, but it is time you need to move on. There are so many wonderful girls that I'm sure you can talk to or meet with. I am worried about you and want for you to get better. No girl is worth this kind of pain. I miss the old Joshua. I know you loved her,
but she did not care. She broke your...."
"Heart? Is that what you about to say? You have no idea what you are going through. Have you
wished this pain would go away! No, you don't! So back off!"
"Just because some girl did you wrong doesn't give you the right to be nasty to your mother!"
"James, please."
"Don't defend him. That girl was not worth your time! She was no good! If she was..."
"Stop it! This is not helping at alll! Joshua needs our help, not our judgement"
