"I'LL PRAY FOR YOU" ...this is a mistake

[znr]

So you're pratically saying that if you are able to help someone, then you should do something for them instead of just saying you would pray that something good happens to them? Am I right?

I'm not pulling punches. I didn't practically say it, in my mind, I said it straight up, yes.

 

[znr]

I don't agree with the second half of the statement, but even Scripture says something to the same effect.

James 2:16

New International Version (NIV)

16 If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it?


If one doesn't have the ability to help, prayer is appreciated, IMO. But do judge what it means to have the ability to help. Most Christians don't think they can help those in need, yet they have cable, unlimited data plans on their phones, go out to the movies instead of waiting for them to show up on Netflix or Redbox or whatever where they could watch them much cheaper if they want to watch them.

You'd be surprised how much you have to help brothers and sisters in need when you cut out the toys. A cell phone, maybe even with some texting, fine. Unlimited data plans when you have internet at home? Is that really necessary?

I can see how my brevity might be shocking, but I read you saying you agree nonetheless. Ah yes, believers with all the creature comforts and more who don't offer much more than prayer. That's very frustrating; empty empty.

 

[Mcrfan343]

I'm not pulling punches. I didn't practically say it, in my mind, I said it straight up, yes.

Gotcha.

 

[znr]

Now that I re-read the order of posts here...My other statement wasn't directed to you. It was just a recap of what I already said. It just happened that the order of things made it look like it was in direct response to you, personally. It wasn't.

You don't have to be mean about it.

 

[LilLamb219]

Sometimes I do feel that way about people wanting to pray...but when I'm e-mailing my BFF from high school and we say it to each other, I actually know there is genuine love in the offering of praying for one another. So, I guess for me it honestly depends on the person and what is involved.

 

[BFine]

I know what you mean Zeener, I got that a lot when my husband
was in the trauma hospital for nearly two months.

"I'll pray for you" --that's a poor substitute for I will visit
you and lend you a shoulder to cry on...no one did that.
Nor did anyone visit me in my home in the evenings...I had
lots of cards, gift baskets, flowers etc... what I really could of used
was a friend with a listening ear and a warm hug or hand-holding.

Now that I'm part of the pastoral care team at church, I give to those
who are hurting what I really needed-- a listening ear, hug and or hand-holding
(in person visit.)
*I also include a card and a gift.

 

[mandyangel]

We should be praying more not less. Just talking to God even no matter where we are, its the best.

 

[znr]

We should be praying more not less. Just talking to God even no matter where we are, its the best.

Mandy, with respect, you missed my point. In context of my op, I'm specifically bringing up a certain type of mistake on the part of Christians, and that is: prayer is not a substitute for taking action and giving and meeting needs when it's well within the power of the person who's praying to take action and meet that need. Those prayers are insulting and hurtful and they lack integrity. I didn't say pray less, I said lip service is empty; empty empty. In fact I've had extensive dialog with God today about how hurtful empty words are. To be honest, when a friend (in real life) says "I'll pray for you" but then goes about their merry way, oblivious to my needs because of laziness or selfishness, I really question whether or not a) my choice of friends lacks godly wisdom, which is a possibility and b) people are becoming callous in general. It's probably both of those things. Nevertheless, this isn't just my personal problem. I've noticed that people are following through less, praying more, and calling it a day. I'm on a iPhone typing so my answers are concise, and that said obviously I'd like to expound more when I can.

 

[CounselorForChrist]

I knew you were not a scammer. I donated. I had it in my power to do so. It wasn't much, but it wasn't a vain prayer either and I didn't keep repeating that I'd pray for you over and over.

And I thank those who did like yourself. I wish people could have seen how I cried for days from the joy.

And I'll add, I'm sorry your family didn't help you when they were able. That's harsh. I hope that you'll show them.

Oh indeed. My dad think its a bad idea not to invite them because they won't talk to us or see us. I told him "Hows that a loss since they only see me once a year as it is?". lol. ^.^

 

[HEsTiLLALiVe]

Zeener's right though. That's why Yahushua said in the parable to the sheep: Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: I was hungry you fed me, thirsty, you gave me drink, I was a stranger, and you visited took me in. Then to the goats: depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, the devil and his angels: For I was an hungred, and ye gave me no meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me no drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me not in: naked, and ye clothed me not: sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not. So yeah if you can help the individual by actually being the answer to their prayer, rather than just prayer when it's in your power to 'do for' you should. Otherwise you should keep your prayers to yourself, becuase in a sense you're telling GOD your not humble enough to LOVE The Way He has taught you. And for that, you'd be better just keeping your "prayers" to yourself, otherwise your showing your own fruitlessness. Be blessed and Shalom

 

[HEsTiLLALiVe]

Sorry guys I just have to say though, Zeener's speaking in complete agreement with what the Scriptures say, and if anyone does not like it, please, let me know, I will pray for you. Be blessed and Shalom

 

[marnor90]

What about "Pray for your enemies"?

And didn't Jesus pray for Peter that his faith shouldn't die out;
as he had hard trials by Satan?

I just wanna discuss

 

[znr]

Thanks, HEsTiLLALiVe.

Sorry guys I just have to say though, Zeener's speaking in complete agreement with what the Scriptures say, and if anyone does not like it, please, let me know, I will pray for you. Be blessed and Shalom

 

[znr]

I'm still waiting on an email. A simple email. I mean really. All this task requires is a simple sending of an email. It's not that hard. Good grief I've had it with Christians. I really can't be bothered anymore to expect a freaking thing from any Christian. Except that they won't follow through. Not only can I expect it, I can bank on it. I'm talking simple things, like return a phone call, return an email.

I know what you mean Zeener, I got that a lot when my husband
was in the trauma hospital for nearly two months.

"I'll pray for you" --that's a poor substitute for I will visit
you and lend you a shoulder to cry on...no one did that.
Nor did anyone visit me in my home in the evenings...I had
lots of cards, gift baskets, flowers etc... what I really could of used
was a friend with a listening ear and a warm hug or hand-holding.

Now that I'm part of the pastoral care team at church, I give to those
who are hurting what I really needed-- a listening ear, hug and or hand-holding
(in person visit.)
*I also include a card and a gift.

 

[Erie79]

Zeener,
I'm sorry you are bothered by someone saying they will pray for you. I understand it can be seen as offensive. I try to be careful when I say this to people because I do not want to be though of as insincere. I make sure to say it when I am really going to pray for that person. Whatever you are going through, I'm sorry I will say a quick prayer because I believe in the power of praying for others. I hope things improve soon!

Take care,
Erie

 

[Eyesee]

I'm still waiting on an email. A simple email. I mean really. All this task requires is a simple sending of an email. It's not that hard. Good grief I've had it with Christians. I really can't be bothered anymore to expect a freaking thing from any Christian. Except that they won't follow through. Not only can I expect it, I can bank on it. I'm talking simple things, like return a phone call, return an email.

Hi Zeener,

I'm very sorry. I know the level of dissappointment that you feel; Christian "friends" that never call or return calls, never check in just to say "hello" or even see if you are doing ok...

I've been round and round with God on this and unfortunately it is incumbent upon us to forgive so that a bitter root doesn't take place in our hearts. Sadly, I have learned (especially with other believers) to release them from any and all expectations. I'm not even sure that is the right or biblical attitude to have, but I guess you might say I have had enough of having my heart broken over seemingly apathetic people who are supposed to care. Some of the worst hurt I have ever experienced has come at the hand of believers. By the way, in no way am I suggesting that I do everything right; I have done some very hurtful and insensitive things as well.

I was struck by the irony of something similar to this at work. Like any other workplace, we have believers and unbelievers. More often than not the unbelievers are the ones who will actually take the time to say "hello" and show sincere concern over the affairs of my life (how I am doing, etc.) and it is all the believers can do to give me the time of day, lol.

I have no answers for all of this, I just wanted to say I know where you are coming from and I am sorry. God forgive us.

 

[motherprayer]

I'm not being mean, I'm being blunt, and sometimes blunt is the only thing that works.

Can I make that part of my sig? Seriously, people don't understand the difference between mean and blunt.

But as for your OP, I agree SOOOOO much. When a member of my church passed away unexpectedly, I called other churches in the area to try to get help, and the response was amazing. But on the flipside, the church that I USED TO ATTEND, who was able to help us and be reumbursed by a foundation that they work with, said "We have a conference this week. Sorry we're too busy, but we're praying for you!" I wanted to reach through the phone and do something VERY un-Christian.

 

[Erie79]

Zeener,
I did not read through I of the posts. I will read all of them and post a response. I'm so sorry.

 

[TheyCallMeDave]

To keep saying this to people when it's in your power to do more is not only a mistake, it's hurtful and lacks integrity.

Keep your prayers to yourself.

That's my advice.

Many many times it isnt within our power or scope to do more. In fact, offering up Someone in Prayer is the GREATEST thing one can possibly do because it reflects a genuine sincere joining of yourself with anothers personal trial for consideration by the Creator of the Universe . The Bible on numerous occasions command us to pray for others and in all situations...so, its best we follow scripture as our truthsource which im afraid makes your view untenable.

If you personally do not wish to be prayed for when someone says they will ... then politely ask them not to pray for you. But please....dont command all people to refrain from what God asks us to do for another. Thank you.

 

[znr]

Oh boy, did you just miss my point. In addition, you didn't comprehend what I actually said [reread where I make it a POINT to mention WHEN it IS within our power to do something]. I made that clear and concise. Dave. You missed my point. Furthermore, you say I am commanding people to do something, which I am certainly not doing.

Many many times it isnt within our power or scope to do more. In fact, offering up Someone in Prayer is the GREATEST thing one can possibly do because it reflects a genuine sincere joining of yourself with anothers personal trial for consideration by the Creator of the Universe . The Bible on numerous occasions command us to pray for others and in all situations...so, its best we follow scripture as our truthsource which im afraid makes your view untenable.

If you personally do not wish to be prayed for when someone says they will ... then politely ask them not to pray for you. But please....dont command all people to refrain from what God asks us to do for another. Thank you.