I once called myself a Christian

[forGod1]

but can't insult God by using that word to describe myself. I believe in the Biblical God, but that doesn't make me a Christian.

I look at the world and see where atheists are coming from. Everything is weird in the Bible.. it just doesn't seem to line up with what I'm seeing. I've just seen countless miracles in my own life. I know I am suppose to follow the Bible and be a representation of Christ. I just seem to need to fit in with what the world is telling me, when I know from countless things that the God of the Bible exists, whether people understand it or not.

My biggest concern is, if I ever come back to trying to letting God guide my steps, is that I'll fall back into that everyone is damned rut. The rut where I see everyone as this lost cause and all I can do is pray. I feel so hopeless.. when I know they've been shown enough themselves. There's no denying any of the Bible. You see these guys like Ben Carson and Mike Huckabee disgrace the faith. I just wish I could be a loner Christian, since I can't seem to let people meet the standards I have for Christians. I always say either that bit about how only a few shall enter Heaven is really true.. or it's all make believe, because, honestly, most Christians are so bad at being Christian it goes beyond the "We're all sinners" thing.

It's just I feel like I can't save the world.. and that stops me before I can even begin. Is this post rhetorical? Am I really looking for answers? Please advise me in any way you can. Thank you.

-Trevor

 

[forGod1]

God showed me today how I'm suppose to show people close to me my faith and stay a phone call away. I can't keep letting people drag me down, I just love them so much. I've said and done some awful things in the last year and some change. I've liked every atheist page on facebook, I've slandered everything religious to anyone that would listen, i've promoted marijuana, i've.. blah blah blah.. I know it all goes away in the blink of real sorrow expressed to God for hurting God. I know we don't deserve any of this time we have. I know I can't let schizo-affective disorder get me down. All I've ever had is Christ. I've literally seen so many things.. things that can't be attributed to Schizophrenia, no matter how much I try to connect those imaginary dots.

 

[forGod1]

I know if it was all over, I'd be dead. Once our chances end, we're dead. I just can't seem to get going. The same old story with me, all the time. I want to be this rebel.. I just can't get beyond Noah's Ark and the implausible nature of the entire thing. I can't get beyond what the old testament says about slavery. It's almost like I want to teach God how to be God. I know that's pretty blasphemous. anywho.. I'm done. God Speed.

 

[ISTANDBYJESUS]

but can't insult God by using that word to describe myself. I believe in the Biblical God, but that doesn't make me a Christian.

I look at the world and see where atheists are coming from. Everything is weird in the Bible.. it just doesn't seem to line up with what I'm seeing. I've just seen countless miracles in my own life. I know I am suppose to follow the Bible and be a representation of Christ. I just seem to need to fit in with what the world is telling me, when I know from countless things that the God of the Bible exists, whether people understand it or not.

My biggest concern is, if I ever come back to trying to letting God guide my steps, is that I'll fall back into that everyone is damned rut. The rut where I see everyone as this lost cause and all I can do is pray. I feel so hopeless.. when I know they've been shown enough themselves. There's no denying any of the Bible. You see these guys like Ben Carson and Mike Huckabee disgrace the faith. I just wish I could be a loner Christian, since I can't seem to let people meet the standards I have for Christians. I always say either that bit about how only a few shall enter Heaven is really true.. or it's all make believe, because, honestly, most Christians are so bad at being Christian it goes beyond the "We're all sinners" thing.

It's just I feel like I can't save the world.. and that stops me before I can even begin. Is this post rhetorical? Am I really looking for answers? Please advise me in any way you can. Thank you.

-Trevor

I use to call myself a Christian before I got the fear of God and was saved: then after that, I knew I was a Christian.

 

[jenny1972]

maybe you should take a break trying to force yourself to accept what your mind is having trouble accepting and just let it go , and just focus on God and let Him guide you and inspire you . ask God to give you understanding about these stories and how you should interpret them He can give you insight about them and help you understand . Do you trust in God to help you ?

 

[Aidan K]

I know if it was all over, I'd be dead. Once our chances end, we're dead. I just can't seem to get going. The same old story with me, all the time. I want to be this rebel.. I just can't get beyond Noah's Ark and the implausible nature of the entire thing. I can't get beyond what the old testament says about slavery. It's almost like I want to teach God how to be God. I know that's pretty blasphemous. anywho.. I'm done. God Speed.

Know that God loves you dearly and knows you by name. Be His child and allow Him to be your father

 

[Grabs Popcorn]

ForGod1, maybe you think too much?..
Heed Pauls warning and don't get sidetracked into heavyweight theology-
"I'm worried lest you be led astray from the simplicity of Christ" (2 Corinthians 11:3)

And people quickly realised-
"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith" (Hebrews 12:2)

Keep it light, it's not hard, Jesus said-
"You're my friends if you follow me. I don't call you servants, but I call you friends"- (John 15:15)

 

[Zandy12]

I understand where your coming from. When I was young it was so easy to believe in God because fast-forward to 2015 I never thought life would be as confusing and disgraceful as this existence. Plus I learn more about the world around me and one can easily rationalize that God doesn't exist and it is just a fairy tale. I get it. The way life works and how things work in this world make no sense for a God to be needed or so. This world is filled with really bad sinners everywhere it makes you wonder was Jesus like a prank or something? I wish I was joking but that's how I really feel sometimes. And then you see innocent people suffering for no reason, and you see it happening so often you start to lose hope in a better life, or a decent one even if at all for yourself. Everyone is just a slave to the zeitgeist and that life is just a bunch of lies and vanity, like how Solomon said in the book of Ecclesiastes. That book really explained alot to me btw and I really encourage you to read it. Also what also really helped me is somedays I take 15 minutes out the day to just talk to God uncensored. I tell him everything thats on my mind and ask why is this happening. It's really therapeutic and you feel this sense of peace afterwards knowing that at least you've cast your worries all on God. I really don't have a straightforward answer for you but one reason why I have held on to God for so long is hope. Knowing that there's got to be more to life than this. There has to be. Something isn't right about this life I just know it in my guts. We live in fallen world and this mess we live in fits a perfect description of it clearly. I believe you might be depressed. Becareful what you believe to be true because depression can tell you so many lies and fool you. Most of the time these thoughts aren't even accurate and bear no resemblance to the actual world we live in. I will pray for you and i encourage you to do the same. Look up articles online to help you gauge towards a more accurate description of God and fight hard for your faith. Never lose hope. Here is a website that helped me to find God: http://rcg.org/home.html

I wish the best for you.

 

[throughfiierytrial]

RE your first post:
Hello there!
I felt moved to post to you b/c some of what you say is where I was in the faith.God's Word is the only remedy for me and so I'm going to post some Scripture to hopefully roundout your thoughts a bit more. But first I'd like to say that although I never had trouble believing miracles b/c if you can believe in an Almighty God behind all this stuff we call life then certainly He's great enough to do miracles. The everybody's damned part I can relate to...I felt that way about my own family members at many times.
Certainly when we read Scripture we read of the Holiness of God and His righteous requirements and worry too much about our sin and the sins of others and the seemingly huge responsibility we carry around as Christians. Becoming a Christian feels a little bit like becoming a new business manager or taking on some such new role. We want so much to be competent and effective at our work and sometimes we tend to the little details too much and run out of time for the bigger, more important tasks. But usually one can "settle in" to the new role over time and see things for the bigger picture and things fall into place more readily. We grow up some in that role...likewise for growth in Christ...and I'm still growing too and I hope I always will be.
This passage may help you feel both that you are in good company and on the right road:
Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you.
(Many people do great battle with Satan when turning to Christ...it can be strange indeed.) --I Peter 4:13
26 “If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple. --Luke 14:25-26
(why post this?...it's why we at first have a love/hate relationship with ourselves and the world...we hate our sin and that of others b/c we are helpless to change it as fast as we'd like and one could expound further, but know that loving righteousness can produce unwanted side effects b/c we will always carry around sin in our body on this side of heaven.
The world IS a sinful, disturbing place and Jesus says b/c of the increase of wickedness the love of most will grow cold...so the world is only growing more wicked. As one tries to live a righteous life one surely finds many roadblocks. Jesus says few find the right path.
They are godless men, whose condemnation was written about long ago have secretly slipped in among you. --Jude:4
(Jude is writing to the church...so the situation is grim all over among Christians too for there are quasi-Christians.)
Live in love brother and find peace...the attributes of love are found in I Corinthians 13, find them and try to exercise them. It is a broader approach and helps you determine/establish healthy boundaries.
Jesus taught ultimately to love...love God and love your fellowman. Romans says love is the fulfillment of the commandments. As someone else advised you I too say lighten up a bit and exercise love. You can mind your own business being loving and polite and be scattering seeds as just by doing so. You will learn when God has sent someone your way for special help which God hand-picked you for. In your reading keep on, keeping on...continue on reading...hand the doubts to God and trust and believe that He will make things plain for you...only as plain as He determines necessary for you as an individual Christian. Eagerly seek though.
Think I wrote too much...can you tell I'm eager to help? ha! I would have loved help when I converted "fully" and so I pass this on to you with all my love. Godspeed!

 

[graceandpeace]

but can't insult God by using that word to describe myself. I believe in the Biblical God, but that doesn't make me a Christian.

I look at the world and see where atheists are coming from. Everything is weird in the Bible.. it just doesn't seem to line up with what I'm seeing. I've just seen countless miracles in my own life. I know I am suppose to follow the Bible and be a representation of Christ. I just seem to need to fit in with what the world is telling me, when I know from countless things that the God of the Bible exists, whether people understand it or not.

My biggest concern is, if I ever come back to trying to letting God guide my steps, is that I'll fall back into that everyone is damned rut. The rut where I see everyone as this lost cause and all I can do is pray. I feel so hopeless.. when I know they've been shown enough themselves. There's no denying any of the Bible. You see these guys like Ben Carson and Mike Huckabee disgrace the faith. I just wish I could be a loner Christian, since I can't seem to let people meet the standards I have for Christians. I always say either that bit about how only a few shall enter Heaven is really true.. or it's all make believe, because, honestly, most Christians are so bad at being Christian it goes beyond the "We're all sinners" thing.

It's just I feel like I can't save the world.. and that stops me before I can even begin. Is this post rhetorical? Am I really looking for answers? Please advise me in any way you can. Thank you.

-Trevor

Hi,

First, I think it's okay to take a step back & breathe. Your post reads like you're burdened, & it's okay not to have everything figured out just yet.

Second, there are some weird things in the Bible, so there's no problem in saying so. I wonder though if perhaps there is more to this sentiment you've shared. I'm going to just say that not everything in the Bible is meant to be taken as literal fact, & the texts of the Bible cover a wide range of genres. For Christians, Jesus is our starting & ending point when reading these texts - meaning, we should look at the texts in light of who Jesus is & His message.

Third, it's easy to feel pessimistic about people & things in the world. I think everyone feels that way sometimes. Jesus does call us not to judge & condemn others, but to forgive. Perhaps if you feel drawn to taking a negative view of others, remind yourself to forgive whatever wrong you might perceive, & ask God to help you see that He loves the whole world. Christians believe that one day God will set all things right & make all things new, so endeavor to participate in making things right in your own day to day. Little by little, perhaps the pessimism will dissipate.

Peace for you.

 

[Truthseeker1971]

but can't insult God by using that word to describe myself. I believe in the Biblical God, but that doesn't make me a Christian.

I look at the world and see where atheists are coming from. Everything is weird in the Bible.. it just doesn't seem to line up with what I'm seeing. I've just seen countless miracles in my own life. I know I am suppose to follow the Bible and be a representation of Christ. I just seem to need to fit in with what the world is telling me, when I know from countless things that the God of the Bible exists, whether people understand it or not.

My biggest concern is, if I ever come back to trying to letting God guide my steps, is that I'll fall back into that everyone is damned rut. The rut where I see everyone as this lost cause and all I can do is pray. I feel so hopeless.. when I know they've been shown enough themselves. There's no denying any of the Bible. You see these guys like Ben Carson and Mike Huckabee disgrace the faith. I just wish I could be a loner Christian, since I can't seem to let people meet the standards I have for Christians. I always say either that bit about how only a few shall enter Heaven is really true.. or it's all make believe, because, honestly, most Christians are so bad at being Christian it goes beyond the "We're all sinners" thing.

It's just I feel like I can't save the world.. and that stops me before I can even begin. Is this post rhetorical? Am I really looking for answers? Please advise me in any way you can. Thank you.

-Trevor

A good quote that comes to mind is Be still and know that I am God. Be still in this case means to stop striving. Stop fighting to do things your own way and let God lead.

AS a Christian, I can honestly say I know what you are feeing because there have been many times when I feel so discouraged that though I desperately want to serve Christ and lead lost souls to Christ and His one and only saving sacrifice on the cross but I feel like I am getting nowhere, not only with non Christians but with people who CALL themselves Christians and yet fight against me because I am very outspoken for the hard truth and these people are too afraid to speak out for the truth because they are afraid to offend others.

I am always having to remind myself that Christ is in control and we have to let Him lead. Even if we find ourselves sitting on the sidelines a lot. We have to WAIT on him and have faith that He will call us into the game eventually.

You are right, you cannot save the world. But you can plant a seed to save one lost soul, and that one saved soul will go on to save others. THAT is how you can save the world. Not all at once because that is impossible but little by little

 

[1watchman]

You are right god1: believing in God does not make one a Christian. If one really wants to know how to become a true Christian ---"born again" by the Holy Spirit, sealed as a "child of God" forever and assured of Heaven, they should read John 1; John 3; John 14; and make special note of 1 Jn. 5: 10-12. Ask God to teach you the meaning of these verses; and continue reading God's Word as in the NT daily ----the answer to salvation and blessings is NOT in the OT. It is not about reasoning, trying to follow God's teachings, etc.; but RECEIVING God's beloved Son into one's heart and being settled and satisfied with His promises and His presence. That is the essence of the Gospel message.

 

[Dirk1540]

Double post

 

[Grabs Popcorn]

Lighten up..
Somewhere along the line you've had the wrong idea about Christianity put into your head by misguided teachers, and as a result you think it's a big complicated thing!
Take Paul's advice on board-
"I'm worried lest you be led astray from the simplicity of Christ" (2 Cor 11:3)

 

[ToBeLoved]

God showed me today how I'm suppose to show people close to me my faith and stay a phone call away. I can't keep letting people drag me down, I just love them so much. I've said and done some awful things in the last year and some change. I've liked every atheist page on facebook, I've slandered everything religious to anyone that would listen, i've promoted marijuana, i've.. blah blah blah.. I know it all goes away in the blink of real sorrow expressed to God for hurting God. I know we don't deserve any of this time we have. I know I can't let schizo-affective disorder get me down. All I've ever had is Christ. I've literally seen so many things.. things that can't be attributed to Schizophrenia, no matter how much I try to connect those imaginary dots.

Sometimes when someone is severe in the opposite direction about God, this is where people than see the biggest transformation. This can be a very powerful testimony for Jesus Christ. Very powerful.

People do of course listen to what we say, but it is only with a grain of salt. When you "do" that is when your testimony will shine through.

Try to remember that God calls us to do our personal best. That is all any of us can do. Jesus will work wonders in your life just doing your best!

Remember the fruit of the Holy Spirit. This is the fruit that we should bare because we are Christ''s

Galatians 5:22
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.

Find yourself a good church that edifies each other.

God bless you.

 

[rockytopva]

Build... Your.... Faith....

 

[Grabs Popcorn]

As ToBeLoved says a couple of posts above- "Find yourself a good church that edifies each other."

Yes, and I'd add this advice- if you join a church but don't feel comfortable in it, GET OUT and try another!
"He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm" (Proverbs 13:20)
Don't stay there simply because you feel you must be a "churchgoer".
I myself have been "between churches" for a long time because I can't find one I like, as the ones I tried left me feeling tired, drained and weakened, so I'm quite happy to "go it alone" in the meantime.
Sure it'd be good to find a church on the same wavelength, but the bottom line is that if we've got Jesus in our lives, he strengthens us more than any church can-
Jesus said- "Call nobody teacher except me" (Matthew 23:8-10)
For example Alexander Selkirk (the real life Robinson Crusoe) found God while alone on the island, and so did Doolittle Raider Jake de Shazer while a POW.

 

[Dirk1540]

I know if it was all over, I'd be dead.

I think about this also. I'm too academic with the whole thing...in a nut shell it boils down to this 'Would you want to live in a world where Jesus was the King of the world?' Sometimes I'm not sure. I'm no born & bred Christian, I don't feel that emotional pull to meditate on Jesus and desire him like I know you're supposed to (if you are Christian). Too often I'm simply 'Researching' the subject.

Once our chances end, we're dead.

I agree. I do not agree with a concept of eternal torture. And that is not an emotional stance it is my Biblical stance.

I just can't get beyond Noah's Ark and the implausible nature of the entire thing. I can't get beyond what the old testament says about slavery. It's almost like I want to teach God how to be God. I know that's pretty blasphemous. anywho.. I'm done. God Speed.

Slavery in the OT is much different than how we know it (history of American slavery). View it thru the eyes of the contemporary audience of the Torah, as crazy as it sounds when they read the slavery laws they said to themselves "Wow slaves have it great!" Remember everything is relative, they just got out of dreaded Egyptian forms of slavery. Plus slavery was less vile back then, it was actually a financial strategy for a lot of people meaning a lot of people chose to be slaves.

For whatever the reason God does not seem to care about pushing drastic social changes of prosperity (the only prosperity God offered was IF they followed his commands he would make them prosperous, if not they would not be). But as far as teaching the world that monarchy & communism (which was the system in Acts) was horrendous compared to capitalism, and a system of government with checks & balances...God doesn't seem to care about helping us with such foreknowledge. I've complained about that a lot. If God was all knowing why would he not teach us that monarchy is straight up HORRIBLE?? The answer that I think I've uncovered seems hard to accept. I have a couple audio Bibles from the 60s & 70s, these pastors lived thru the Great Depression. In the studies they talk about how 'Kids today' don't know God because they have it too good. They don't have to pray for their next meal, or thank God for a new pair of shoes. In a nut shell nobody seeks God when they are prospering (why would you seek him if everything is rosy?). Well such a theory makes sense but I admit it is a hard pill to swallow. Perhaps God thinks way less about prosperity in this life then we do, perhaps poor people who sell themselves into slavery have a very strong pull towards God whereas a kid with 3 iphones, and 7 shows recorded on DVR can care less about God. It's food for thought. What would also be relative is how we view this life (which seems like EVERYTHING) and how God views it (which is a very tiny slice of time).

There is more to Noah's Ark then meets the eye. First of all, the early chapters in Genesis are the most insanely BRIEF accounts you will ever read. One sentence can possibly cover hundreds of years, giving you fine details was not a priority apparently. Anyway, Noah's Ark was God starting over. God had a gameplan. God created humans. God also CREATED the Heavenly Host. The 'Sons of God' in Genesis were not human. The Heavenly host completely undermined God's plan and they procreated with human women, the Nephalim were the imbred offspring. Sounds crazy right? Well here's the thing, there is NO theory that doesn't sound crazy. The belief that after a big bang the universe just spun into it's current state by total random chance is a crazy theory. The theory of the Bible is crazy. The theory that there is a God but NOT the God of the Bible is a crazy theory also (Ok a God of love right...well then how does THAT God of love answer the objection to the problem of evil in the world?? Why would an alternate God get a free pass on that tough question?? So that theory also makes no sense either because you are still left with the unanswered 'Problem of Evil' question that the Christian is always pressed to answer). At least the Bible gives reasons for the evil (although a lot of people hate the answer). In the end you can't say 'What makes sense' because nothing makes sense. It is scientific fact that the universe X amount of years ago did not exist...and it's scientific fact X amount of years from now it will cease to exist. How does THAT make any sense? It's not about what makes sense (because no theory does) it is rather about which theory has the best evidence backing it up.

The theory of God as an unemotional mechanical force who doesn't care doesn't make any sense either. How on Earth would a peon like you or me contain attributes that God lacks? We are measly specs of dust WITHIN a measly spec of dust called Earth. Do you think we would have abilities that God would lack?? The ability to feel, the ability to make decisions, ability to care, etc. God would most certainly have every attribute & ability that me and you have AND THEN SOME!! God would certainly not lack attributes that we have, who are we?? We are insignificant specs. If we could feel, and make decisions so can God.

It's a cool drill to think about...it's so easy to say to yourself 'The Bible makes no sense.' But how often do people think about an alternative option that does make sense? Try to think about an alternative that does make sense, it's hard! I find that philosophically any theory could make your head explode lol. I'll never understand why the atheist always seems to get a free pass on this argument...the theory that "The world 'By total chance' spun into it's current state of existance" is one of the worst theories ever.