I desperately need help (Hebrews 6)

[Lia’socks]

I desperately need help. I feel almost numb like I don’t care anymore. My heart is so corrupt and I really believe my conscience is dead. My heart posture matches that of a Pharisees and I really think I fit the Hebrews 6 category. It describes my situation very well. (Sorry in advance if I sound despairing and sorry for the bad grammar)


I had an experience with god to an extent but then after having the experience with him and getting to know him I began to love my sins more. I read my Bible and somewhat loved god. I had a professing faith though and it was more shallow/ religious. I’ve always been one to stray and go back to the mire and god was with me for quite long. I'm surprised he stuck around with me for so long but I deliberately and consciously rejected him and his convictions so badly. I committed heinous sins and I ignored him so badly. When I realized this I panicked at first because I feared hell and I was scared that the Holy Spirit left but after some time of waiting for him to come back I fell away and went even deeper into the world, forgetting everything god did for me and ogoing against God and Christianity. I stopped worrying because it was affecting my mental health and I had to push the situation deep in my mind and so I stopped caring to an extent. I don’t think I was repentant at that time and I don’t think I am now. I’ve turned into a terrible person and I don’t think I have a journey with god anymore. I’m scared of hell and I’m scared to become truly hardened even though I think I already am. I don’t think I can truly be repentant and I think that I kept going to sin and evil and i don’t feel conviction anymore. Now that I’m trying to change it’s not by the power or help of the Holy Spirit and I’ve been a terribly host to the Holy Spirit so I know I’m in no favor with him and I’ve possibly even blasphemed him because my heart was so hard and I indirectly in my heart and mind, purposely to taunt god, attributed the Holy Spirit to Satan. I resisted and rebelled against conviction and I toyed with sin. My spiritual state is unknown but it’s possible that I’m not in a good state and I already died spiritually. I’ve destroyed my life with my sins but now that I realize somewhat the situation im in I want to change but that desire might not be enough. I understand from Judas’s story that apostasy and backsliding are two different things and the possible apostasy stated in Hebrews 6 is a serious one.


I guess I don’t know what to do because it says directly that it’s impossible to repent of and i can’t repent and I know I don’t want to go to hell. These last few years have shown me how miserable life is without god I just failed to see that god left my life like I didn’t care- like I was fine with it so that might be an indicator that god had already given me up since then. I persisted in my sins and even hated god and his commands because I wanted to do evil. I want to be the prodigal son but I also know that the darkness in me exceeds me and my heart and conscience are calloused.

I know I’m in a perilous situation and I don’t know what to do. I say all these things but in real life I know I’m also a jerk and my behaviors are so bad. I fail to love others every moment. I feel like I made myself a slave to sin and that’s why I act the way I do and I’ll die in my sins. I don’t believe god is drawing me anymore and I don’t believe he’s calling me to repentance anymore either. I’ve tried changing my ways but my heart and mind and soul isn’t in it and it’s not sincere. I’ve been like this for years but I decided to do something and pay attention to my condition finally a year ago and now I’m still stuck. I did everything I could to sever myself from Christ so I don’t think there’s any hope. Also im not sure any prayers can help me either because my sins might also be sins that lead to death.

 

[Pop D.]

No. You may have left God, but He never left you. He will never leave you or forsake you. Repent of your sins, turn from them, and return to The Lord.

 

[HTacianas]

I desperately need help. I feel almost numb like I don’t care anymore. My heart is so corrupt and I really believe my conscience is dead. My heart posture matches that of a Pharisees and I really think I fit the Hebrews 6 category. It describes my situation very well. (Sorry in advance if I sound despairing and sorry for the bad grammar)


I had an experience with god to an extent but then after having the experience with him and getting to know him I began to love my sins more. I read my Bible and somewhat loved god. I had a professing faith though and it was more shallow/ religious. I’ve always been one to stray and go back to the mire and god was with me for quite long. I'm surprised he stuck around with me for so long but I deliberately and consciously rejected him and his convictions so badly. I committed heinous sins and I ignored him so badly. When I realized this I panicked at first because I feared hell and I was scared that the Holy Spirit left but after some time of waiting for him to come back I fell away and went even deeper into the world, forgetting everything god did for me and ogoing against God and Christianity. I stopped worrying because it was affecting my mental health and I had to push the situation deep in my mind and so I stopped caring to an extent. I don’t think I was repentant at that time and I don’t think I am now. I’ve turned into a terrible person and I don’t think I have a journey with god anymore. I’m scared of hell and I’m scared to become truly hardened even though I think I already am. I don’t think I can truly be repentant and I think that I kept going to sin and evil and i don’t feel conviction anymore. Now that I’m trying to change it’s not by the power or help of the Holy Spirit and I’ve been a terribly host to the Holy Spirit so I know I’m in no favor with him and I’ve possibly even blasphemed him because my heart was so hard and I indirectly in my heart and mind, purposely to taunt god, attributed the Holy Spirit to Satan. I resisted and rebelled against conviction and I toyed with sin. My spiritual state is unknown but it’s possible that I’m not in a good state and I already died spiritually. I’ve destroyed my life with my sins but now that I realize somewhat the situation im in I want to change but that desire might not be enough. I understand from Judas’s story that apostasy and backsliding are two different things and the possible apostasy stated in Hebrews 6 is a serious one.


I guess I don’t know what to do because it says directly that it’s impossible to repent of and i can’t repent and I know I don’t want to go to hell. These last few years have shown me how miserable life is without god I just failed to see that god left my life like I didn’t care- like I was fine with it so that might be an indicator that god had already given me up since then. I persisted in my sins and even hated god and his commands because I wanted to do evil. I want to be the prodigal son but I also know that the darkness in me exceeds me and my heart and conscience are calloused.

I know I’m in a perilous situation and I don’t know what to do. I say all these things but in real life I know I’m also a jerk and my behaviors are so bad. I fail to love others every moment. I feel like I made myself a slave to sin and that’s why I act the way I do and I’ll die in my sins. I don’t believe god is drawing me anymore and I don’t believe he’s calling me to repentance anymore either. I’ve tried changing my ways but my heart and mind and soul isn’t in it and it’s not sincere. I’ve been like this for years but I decided to do something and pay attention to my condition finally a year ago and now I’m still stuck. I did everything I could to sever myself from Christ so I don’t think there’s any hope. Also im not sure any prayers can help me either because my sins might also be sins that lead to death.

I can tell you've been doing some reading. You've hit on all the high points at least. You say "Hebrews 6" and "sins unto death". They address apostasy and mortal sins committed after baptism. In the new testament age, at least within the Church during the time of the Apostles, either mortal sin committed after baptism or falling into apostasy meant a person's end. The earliest Church Fathers debated just how man mortal sins a person could commit after baptism and still be saved in the end. Some said one, some said maybe two, but most agreed it had to be less than three. Moving on to around 200 AD, Calixtus I, Bishop of Rome, the Pope if you will, began absolving people of the most egregious of sins, those being murder, adultery, and idolatry. The arch-nemesis of Calixtus, Hippolytus of Rome used those same verses against Calixtus and accused him of apostasy. It caused quite a stir. In the end the Church decided that a person could be absolved of mortal sin, even those committed after baptism. That became part of the Tradition of the Church. Note that what you've already read tells you that the Church's Tradition contradicts scripture.

Going on a bit further, after the last Roman persecution, the Church even granted absolution to those who had denied Christ and worshipped the image of the Emperor. That also became the Tradition of the Church and the idea of reconciliation after a time of penance became the norm.

Now you are faced with the folly of sola scriptura. Sola scriptura, or scripture alone, gives you the answer you've already found. Now you are faced with accepting the Tradition of the Church and finding reconciliation or, in short, finding only condemnation. As for myself I accept the Traditions of the Church and hold them on par with scripture with all discrepancies being resolved by Tradition. That is where you are at now. But keep in mind that most people simply ignore all that stuff you've read or torture the language enough that it says something else. But you do in fact understand what it means. That I'm sure of.

 

[BobRyan]

I desperately need help. I feel almost numb like I don’t care anymore. My heart is so corrupt and I really believe my conscience is dead. My heart posture matches that of a Pharisees and I really think I fit the Hebrews 6 category. It describes my situation very well. (Sorry in advance if I sound despairing and sorry for the bad grammar)


I had an experience with god to an extent but then after having the experience with him and getting to know him I began to love my sins more. I read my Bible and somewhat loved god. I had a professing faith though and it was more shallow/ religious. I’ve always been one to stray and go back to the mire and god was with me for quite long. I'm surprised he stuck around with me for so long but I deliberately and consciously rejected him and his convictions so badly. I committed heinous sins and I ignored him so badly. When I realized this I panicked at first because I feared hell and I was scared that the Holy Spirit left but after some time of waiting for him to come back I fell away and went even deeper into the world, forgetting everything god did for me and ogoing against God and Christianity. I stopped worrying because it was affecting my mental health and I had to push the situation deep in my mind and so I stopped caring to an extent. I don’t think I was repentant at that time and I don’t think I am now. I’ve turned into a terrible person and I don’t think I have a journey with god anymore. I’m scared of hell and I’m scared to become truly hardened even though I think I already am. I don’t think I can truly be repentant and I think that I kept going to sin and evil and i don’t feel conviction anymore. Now that I’m trying to change it’s not by the power or help of the Holy Spirit and I’ve been a terribly host to the Holy Spirit so I know I’m in no favor with him and I’ve possibly even blasphemed him because my heart was so hard and I indirectly in my heart and mind, purposely to taunt god, attributed the Holy Spirit to Satan. I resisted and rebelled against conviction and I toyed with sin. My spiritual state is unknown but it’s possible that I’m not in a good state and I already died spiritually. I’ve destroyed my life with my sins but now that I realize somewhat the situation im in I want to change but that desire might not be enough. I understand from Judas’s story that apostasy and backsliding are two different things and the possible apostasy stated in Hebrews 6 is a serious one.


I guess I don’t know what to do because it says directly that it’s impossible to repent of and i can’t repent and I know I don’t want to go to hell.

Many people have gone astray and then come back. Rom 11 says this is true even of the Jews that rejected Christ outright "He is able to renew them again IF they do not CONTINUE in unbelief".

You are mistaken about the Heb 6 context. Notice that the Holy Spirit is the one that "convicts of sin, righteousness and judgment" in John 16.

If you were not being ministered to by the Holy Spirit -- you would have no desire at all to return, no regret, no desire at all to reach out for help. Submit to God - He will lead you. Let all the excuses go -- just reach out after God.

In the book of James - God warns against being "double minded" -- don't give in to "ok I'm coming back to you God - oh no wait! it might be too late, God might not care".

The father sees his son demon possessed and says to Christ in Matt 17 "your disciples could not help my son - so IF YOU CAN please help him" and Christ's response is "IF YOU CAN???? all things are possible to the one who believes!" -- stop toying with the idea that you want to come back but God is not interested in you any more. That is the devil's doctrine - it is not what the Bible teaches.

Doubt has all the followers, all the devotees that it needs. You don't need to join in. Rather turn to God every day, like your life depended on it.

 

[Lia’socks]

Many people have gone astray and then come back. Rom 11 says this is true even of the Jews that rejected Christ outright "He is able to renew them again IF they do not CONTINUE in unbelief".

You are mistaken about the Heb 6 context. Notice that the Holy Spirit is the one that "convicts of sin, righteousness and judgment" in John 16.

If you were not being ministered to by the Holy Spirit -- you would have no desire at all to return, no regret, no desire at all to reach out for help. Submit to God - He will lead you. Let all the excuses go -- just reach out after God.

In the book of James - God warns against being "double minded" -- don't give in to "ok I'm coming back to you God - oh no wait! it might be too late, God might not care".

The father sees his son demon possessed and says to Christ in Matt 17 "your disciples could not help my son - so IF YOU CAN please help him" and Christ's response is "IF YOU CAN???? all things are possible to the one who believes!" -- stop toying with the idea that you want to come back but God is not interested in you any more. That is the devil's doctrine - it is not what the Bible teaches.

Doubt has all the followers, all the devotees that it needs. You don't need to join in. Rather turn to God every day, like your life depended on it.

Thank you so much for this I’ll keep trying ..

 

[AlexB23]

I desperately need help. I feel almost numb like I don’t care anymore. My heart is so corrupt and I really believe my conscience is dead. My heart posture matches that of a Pharisees and I really think I fit the Hebrews 6 category. It describes my situation very well. (Sorry in advance if I sound despairing and sorry for the bad grammar)


I had an experience with god to an extent but then after having the experience with him and getting to know him I began to love my sins more. I read my Bible and somewhat loved god. I had a professing faith though and it was more shallow/ religious. I’ve always been one to stray and go back to the mire and god was with me for quite long. I'm surprised he stuck around with me for so long but I deliberately and consciously rejected him and his convictions so badly. I committed heinous sins and I ignored him so badly. When I realized this I panicked at first because I feared hell and I was scared that the Holy Spirit left but after some time of waiting for him to come back I fell away and went even deeper into the world, forgetting everything god did for me and ogoing against God and Christianity. I stopped worrying because it was affecting my mental health and I had to push the situation deep in my mind and so I stopped caring to an extent. I don’t think I was repentant at that time and I don’t think I am now. I’ve turned into a terrible person and I don’t think I have a journey with god anymore. I’m scared of hell and I’m scared to become truly hardened even though I think I already am. I don’t think I can truly be repentant and I think that I kept going to sin and evil and i don’t feel conviction anymore. Now that I’m trying to change it’s not by the power or help of the Holy Spirit and I’ve been a terribly host to the Holy Spirit so I know I’m in no favor with him and I’ve possibly even blasphemed him because my heart was so hard and I indirectly in my heart and mind, purposely to taunt god, attributed the Holy Spirit to Satan. I resisted and rebelled against conviction and I toyed with sin. My spiritual state is unknown but it’s possible that I’m not in a good state and I already died spiritually. I’ve destroyed my life with my sins but now that I realize somewhat the situation im in I want to change but that desire might not be enough. I understand from Judas’s story that apostasy and backsliding are two different things and the possible apostasy stated in Hebrews 6 is a serious one.


I guess I don’t know what to do because it says directly that it’s impossible to repent of and i can’t repent and I know I don’t want to go to hell. These last few years have shown me how miserable life is without god I just failed to see that god left my life like I didn’t care- like I was fine with it so that might be an indicator that god had already given me up since then. I persisted in my sins and even hated god and his commands because I wanted to do evil. I want to be the prodigal son but I also know that the darkness in me exceeds me and my heart and conscience are calloused.

I know I’m in a perilous situation and I don’t know what to do. I say all these things but in real life I know I’m also a jerk and my behaviors are so bad. I fail to love others every moment. I feel like I made myself a slave to sin and that’s why I act the way I do and I’ll die in my sins. I don’t believe god is drawing me anymore and I don’t believe he’s calling me to repentance anymore either. I’ve tried changing my ways but my heart and mind and soul isn’t in it and it’s not sincere. I’ve been like this for years but I decided to do something and pay attention to my condition finally a year ago and now I’m still stuck. I did everything I could to sever myself from Christ so I don’t think there’s any hope. Also im not sure any prayers can help me either because my sins might also be sins that lead to death.

I will pray for you. But here is a Bible analysis which I released on April 28, that will show you that God is understanding (verses in blue outweigh Hebrews 6). Also, you might have OCD, as some other folks here have scrupulosity issues as well. I have OCD, but thank God that mine is not religious. As you are asking this question, it shows how much you love God, so you are still saved. You might want to discuss this with a priest or pastor who is familiar with the human mind.

Date	April 28, 2024
Verse	Hebrews 6:4-6 (ESV): "For it is impossible, in the case of those who have once been enlightened, who have tasted the heavenly gift, and have shared in the Holy Spirit, and have tasted the goodness of the word of God and the powers of the age to come, and then have fallen away, to restore them again to repentance, since they are crucifying once again the Son of God to their own harm and holding him up to contempt." Jeremiah 31:33 (ESV): "Behold, the days are coming, declares the Lord, when I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel and the house of Judah, not like the covenant that I made with their fathers on the day when I took them by the hand to bring them out of the land of Egypt, my covenant that they broke, though I was their husband, declares the Lord. For this is the covenant that I will make with the house of Israel after those days, declares the Lord: I will put my law within them, and I will write it on their hearts. And I will be their God, and they shall be my people." 1 John 1:9 (ESV): "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." Romans 8:1-4 (ESV): "There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit."
Explanation	The four passages address different aspects of God's relationship with His people and the concept of salvation. Let's examine each passage and then discuss how they relate to one another. 1.Hebrews 6:4-6: This passage emphasizes the gravity of falling away from faith in Christ. It suggests that if someone has experienced the blessings of God's Word and the Holy Spirit, yet deliberately turns away, it might be difficult, but not impossible for them to return to repentance. However, this passage does not exclude the possibility of restoration entirely, as some interpretations may suggest. Instead, it highlights the seriousness of turning away from God and the potential consequences. 2. Jeremiah 31:33: This passage speaks of a new covenant that God will make with Israel and Judah, in which His law will be written on their hearts. This promises a deeper relationship between God and His people, emphasizing the importance of obedience and intimacy. It suggests that salvation is not only about forgiveness but also about transformation and restoration. 3. 1 John 1:9: This passage assures believers that if they confess their sins, God is faithful and just to forgive them and cleanse them from all unrighteousness. This passage emphasizes the importance of confession and the promise of forgiveness, reassuring believers that they can always return to God when they stumble or sin. 4. Romans 8:1-4: This passage declares that believers are free from condemnation because of Christ's sacrifice, allowing them to live according to the Spirit instead of the flesh. It highlights the power of God's grace and the transformation it brings about in a believer's life. *Disclaimer: These passages do not exclude the possibility of God saving someone who has returned to Him after falling away. Each passage emphasizes different aspects of salvation and faith, but none of these verses suggest that God's mercy and forgiveness are limited to a specific period in one's life. Instead, they encourage believers to remain faithful, emphasizing the importance of repentance and obedience.
Societal Relevance	In our modern lives, these passages serve as reminders of God's faithfulness, mercy, and the importance of remaining committed to Him despite any challenges or setbacks. They reassure us that, no matter how far we may stray, God's love and forgiveness are always available to us if we choose to return to Him. No sin is too great for His love and compassion. Additionally, they encourage us to live in obedience to God's will and to seek His guidance daily.

 

[Joseph G]

Another bit of encouragement... consider Jesus' parable of the Prodigal Son again. What if he had run into the Older Brother first when he returned in repentance? You know, the one telling him all the reasons the Loving Father shouldn't take him back. Know who that represents? The Accuser of the Brethren.

Ignore the Accuser, brother. You wouldn't have written this post if it weren't God drawing you back. Take it from a guy who fell away for 30 years, God still loves you and He SHALL complete His good work in you. Keep seeking and keep trusting - He is worthy of your faith.

Ephesians 3:20-21 NIV

"Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen."

 

[ladodgers6]

I desperately need help. I feel almost numb like I don’t care anymore. My heart is so corrupt and I really believe my conscience is dead. My heart posture matches that of a Pharisees and I really think I fit the Hebrews 6 category. It describes my situation very well. (Sorry in advance if I sound despairing and sorry for the bad grammar)


I had an experience with god to an extent but then after having the experience with him and getting to know him I began to love my sins more. I read my Bible and somewhat loved god. I had a professing faith though and it was more shallow/ religious. I’ve always been one to stray and go back to the mire and god was with me for quite long. I'm surprised he stuck around with me for so long but I deliberately and consciously rejected him and his convictions so badly. I committed heinous sins and I ignored him so badly. When I realized this I panicked at first because I feared hell and I was scared that the Holy Spirit left but after some time of waiting for him to come back I fell away and went even deeper into the world, forgetting everything god did for me and ogoing against God and Christianity. I stopped worrying because it was affecting my mental health and I had to push the situation deep in my mind and so I stopped caring to an extent. I don’t think I was repentant at that time and I don’t think I am now. I’ve turned into a terrible person and I don’t think I have a journey with god anymore. I’m scared of hell and I’m scared to become truly hardened even though I think I already am. I don’t think I can truly be repentant and I think that I kept going to sin and evil and i don’t feel conviction anymore. Now that I’m trying to change it’s not by the power or help of the Holy Spirit and I’ve been a terribly host to the Holy Spirit so I know I’m in no favor with him and I’ve possibly even blasphemed him because my heart was so hard and I indirectly in my heart and mind, purposely to taunt god, attributed the Holy Spirit to Satan. I resisted and rebelled against conviction and I toyed with sin. My spiritual state is unknown but it’s possible that I’m not in a good state and I already died spiritually. I’ve destroyed my life with my sins but now that I realize somewhat the situation im in I want to change but that desire might not be enough. I understand from Judas’s story that apostasy and backsliding are two different things and the possible apostasy stated in Hebrews 6 is a serious one.


I guess I don’t know what to do because it says directly that it’s impossible to repent of and i can’t repent and I know I don’t want to go to hell. These last few years have shown me how miserable life is without god I just failed to see that god left my life like I didn’t care- like I was fine with it so that might be an indicator that god had already given me up since then. I persisted in my sins and even hated god and his commands because I wanted to do evil. I want to be the prodigal son but I also know that the darkness in me exceeds me and my heart and conscience are calloused.

I know I’m in a perilous situation and I don’t know what to do. I say all these things but in real life I know I’m also a jerk and my behaviors are so bad. I fail to love others every moment. I feel like I made myself a slave to sin and that’s why I act the way I do and I’ll die in my sins. I don’t believe god is drawing me anymore and I don’t believe he’s calling me to repentance anymore either. I’ve tried changing my ways but my heart and mind and soul isn’t in it and it’s not sincere. I’ve been like this for years but I decided to do something and pay attention to my condition finally a year ago and now I’m still stuck. I did everything I could to sever myself from Christ so I don’t think there’s any hope. Also im not sure any prayers can help me either because my sins might also be sins that lead to death.

Dear Lia, Do you know or ever heard the Gospel that Paul preached? What you are feeling right now is exactly what Satan wants. We all sin daily, and whoever says they do not is a liar. Luther once wrote, we sin everyday, so we need to heard the Gospel everyday. Take a minute and read Romans 7 where the Apostle Paul himself is struggling with his sin. I am not condoning sin, but we as believers will struggle with sin on a daily basis. But where we find refuge, joy, peace, love, warmth and acceptance in his the Gospel; the marvelous good news for the ungodly (Rom. 4:5). Christ did not come to redeem the righteous but the wicked; the sinful. Paul called himself the chief of sinners, just think about that a minute. The Apostle Paul the chief of sinners? Hard to imagine that.

But the truth is, the Gospel is free, and the freer is it, the better it is, because it is a Free Gift that Christ purchased with his suffering and blood. His righteous holy obedient life; he holiness and righteousness that he lived, he did it for us. And Christ's righteousness is given to us as a free gift. And it's this righteousness that wraps us like a robe, and it's this wedding garment that allows us into the feast. Read Romans 5:12-21. And this is received through Faith Alone, trusting in Christ in what He did for you, and it's here where you stand, knowing that there's nothing you can add or substract from Christ's work. He finished at the Cross for you. Trust this and you shall be saved.

As far as the good works and repenting that is a daily life of the believer; a life long process. It's okay to feel shame and betrayal but know this that Christ blood deep cleans all of our sins. The doubt you feel is Satan trying to deceive you. Look to Christ in what he has endured for you, the price he paid for you. And it's okay to cry and feel shame, ask forgiveness and he will forgive it's his promise. Once you stop looking inward and start looking upward then you see the hope that lies in Christ Alone. Just trust and believe Christ and him Alone. Know that he came to save you from your sins, condemnation, hell, and punishment.

Romans 8:1 There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.

Understand this promise, trust in Christ in who he said he was and what he did for you, and there is no condemnation (no hell) right NOW! See how marvelous this good news is for sinners?

Galatians 6:9 And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. 10 So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith.​

 

[Lia’socks]

Dear Lia, Do you know or ever heard the Gospel that Paul preached? What you are feeling right now is exactly what Satan wants. We all sin daily, and whoever says they do not is a liar. Luther once wrote, we sin everyday, so we need to heard the Gospel everyday. Take a minute and read Romans 7 where the Apostle Paul himself is struggling with his sin. I am not condoning sin, but we as believers will struggle with sin on a daily basis. But where we find refuge, joy, peace, love, warmth and acceptance in his the Gospel; the marvelous good news for the ungodly (Rom. 4:5). Christ did not come to redeem the righteous but the wicked; the sinful. Paul called himself the chief of sinners, just think about that a minute. The Apostle Paul the chief of sinners? Hard to imagine that.

But the truth is, the Gospel is free, and the freer is it, the better it is, because it is a Free Gift that Christ purchased with his suffering and blood. His righteous holy obedient life; he holiness and righteousness that he lived, he did it for us. And Christ's righteousness is given to us as a free gift. And it's this righteousness that wraps us like a robe, and it's this wedding garment that allows us into the feast. Read Romans 5:12-21. And this is received through Faith Alone, trusting in Christ in what He did for you, and it's here where you stand, knowing that there's nothing you can add or substract from Christ's work. He finished at the Cross for you. Trust this and you shall be saved.

As far as the good works and repenting that is a daily life of the believer; a life long process. It's okay to feel shame and betrayal but know this that Christ blood deep cleans all of our sins. The doubt you feel is Satan trying to deceive you. Look to Christ in what he has endured for you, the price he paid for you. And it's okay to cry and feel shame, ask forgiveness and he will forgive it's his promise. Once you stop looking inward and start looking upward then you see the hope that lies in Christ Alone. Just trust and believe Christ and him Alone. Know that he came to save you from your sins, condemnation, hell, and punishment.

Romans 8:1 There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.

Understand this promise, trust in Christ in who he said he was and what he did for you, and there is no condemnation (no hell) right NOW! See how marvelous this good news is for sinners?

Galatians 6:9 And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. 10 So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith.​

I’m just scared I persisted in my unbelief so badly that I can’t genuinely want god/repent. I feel somewhat numb

 

[ladodgers6]

I’m just scared I persisted in my unbelief so badly that I can’t genuinely want god/repent. I feel somewhat numb

First of all, you feel guilty about your sin before God, only believers feel that. Non-believers do not. But if I my, what exactly is bothering you?

 

[Lia’socks]

First of all, you feel guilty about your sin before God, only believers feel that. Non-believers do not. But if I my, what exactly is bothering you?

I don’t think I’m truly repentant. I feel ‘guilty’ yes but it’s more of a remorse over my sins- I can’t be contrite or sincere. I know repentance results in a change of action and so far I’ve been trying but I might not sincerely desire it (sorry if that doesn’t make sense) and I don’t feel conviction

 

[Neostarwcc]

Hebrews 6 is just a reminder that it is impossible for a sheep of God to be renewed again to repentance. Mainly, if it were possible for a sheep of God to permanently fall away than it would be impossible to renew them again to repentance because Jesus would have to be crucified again to save them. Basically in this scenario Satan wins and God is defeated. Now that I put it this way it sounds ridiculous right?

That's why scripture (and Jesus) tells us this is impossible. God keeps his sheep in the faith for life and of course, God ultimately will win the battle against Satan and according to the book of Revelation already has won the battle against Satan. Hebrews 6 is meant to educate us on the what ifs more than tell us that we can lose our salvation. It is possible for a sheep of God to fall away in the short term but it is impossible for a sheep to have a permanent falling away. If a person permanently falls away than it is definitive proof that they were NEVER a sheep of God because God keeps his own.

 

[ladodgers6]

I don’t think I’m truly repentant. I feel ‘guilty’ yes but it’s more of a remorse over my sins- I can’t be contrite or sincere. I know repentance results in a change of action and so far I’ve been trying but I might not sincerely desire it (sorry if that doesn’t make sense) and I don’t feel conviction

But for a person to feel this way it because they an to change, yes? Are you going to church? Do you have anyone to talk to; family member, Christians brother or sister, a Pastor or Priest? I am here for you, if you want to talk. But what you need right now, is the sweet water of the Gospel. The good news that sinners who feel this way must hear. Are you reading or hearing the Gospel being preached everyday? I listen to the whitehorseinn.org and listen to their podcasts on the Gospel.

Matt. 11: 28 Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

This is a promise.

May I ask why you think you can't be contrite or sincere?​

 

[Lia’socks]

But for a person to feel this way it because they an to change, yes? Are you going to church? Do you have anyone to talk to; family member, Christians brother or sister, a Pastor or Priest? I am here for you, if you want to talk. But what you need right now, is the sweet water of the Gospel. The good news that sinners who feel this way must hear. Are you reading or hearing the Gospel being preached everyday? I listen to the whitehorseinn.org and listen to their podcasts on the Gospel.

Matt. 11: 28 Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

This is a promise.

May I ask why you think you can't be contrite or sincere?​

I still have a somewhat love of sin and I can’t fully grasp gods holiness like I used to and I have a hard heart that is somewhat hostile to god. I also acknowledge that I do fear being held accountable by others and even church rebuke which is why I doubt I am sincere.

 

[ladodgers6]

I still have a somewhat love of sin and I can’t fully grasp gods holiness like I used to and I have a hard heart that is somewhat hostile to god. I also acknowledge that I do fear being held accountable by others and even church rebuke which is why I doubt I am sincere.

May I ask you, how old are you? Are you married? Have kids? Are you going to church? No one can grasp the holiness of God, dear Lia. That's why we needed a mediator; the God-Man who saves sinners! I'll share a story with you. Are you familiar with Martin Luther at all? If not google him. Anyway, he was translating the greek and latin bible into German for his people. When he kept hearing noises, things falling, getting doubts in his head that he is a sinner. Constantly being accuse os this, he responded, yes, I am a sinners and Christ came to save sinners, like me and you.

Just go and talk with your Pastor or Priest and confess everything that's bothering you, why you are feeling guilty. If you can't do it, have a friend or parent go with you. Because love dear Lia is a powerful thing. Look at what Christ did for you and me. Do not use hope because Christ is our life, joy, peace, love, and especially he is our righteousness that clothes us in his white robe of holiness.​

 

[FutureAndAHope]

I desperately need help. I feel almost numb like I don’t care anymore. My heart is so corrupt and I really believe my conscience is dead. My heart posture matches that of a Pharisees and I really think I fit the Hebrews 6 category. It describes my situation very well. (Sorry in advance if I sound despairing and sorry for the bad grammar)


I had an experience with god to an extent but then after having the experience with him and getting to know him I began to love my sins more. I read my Bible and somewhat loved god. I had a professing faith though and it was more shallow/ religious. I’ve always been one to stray and go back to the mire and god was with me for quite long. I'm surprised he stuck around with me for so long but I deliberately and consciously rejected him and his convictions so badly. I committed heinous sins and I ignored him so badly. When I realized this I panicked at first because I feared hell and I was scared that the Holy Spirit left but after some time of waiting for him to come back I fell away and went even deeper into the world, forgetting everything god did for me and ogoing against God and Christianity. I stopped worrying because it was affecting my mental health and I had to push the situation deep in my mind and so I stopped caring to an extent. I don’t think I was repentant at that time and I don’t think I am now. I’ve turned into a terrible person and I don’t think I have a journey with god anymore. I’m scared of hell and I’m scared to become truly hardened even though I think I already am. I don’t think I can truly be repentant and I think that I kept going to sin and evil and i don’t feel conviction anymore. Now that I’m trying to change it’s not by the power or help of the Holy Spirit and I’ve been a terribly host to the Holy Spirit so I know I’m in no favor with him and I’ve possibly even blasphemed him because my heart was so hard and I indirectly in my heart and mind, purposely to taunt god, attributed the Holy Spirit to Satan. I resisted and rebelled against conviction and I toyed with sin. My spiritual state is unknown but it’s possible that I’m not in a good state and I already died spiritually. I’ve destroyed my life with my sins but now that I realize somewhat the situation im in I want to change but that desire might not be enough. I understand from Judas’s story that apostasy and backsliding are two different things and the possible apostasy stated in Hebrews 6 is a serious one.


I guess I don’t know what to do because it says directly that it’s impossible to repent of and i can’t repent and I know I don’t want to go to hell. These last few years have shown me how miserable life is without god I just failed to see that god left my life like I didn’t care- like I was fine with it so that might be an indicator that god had already given me up since then. I persisted in my sins and even hated god and his commands because I wanted to do evil. I want to be the prodigal son but I also know that the darkness in me exceeds me and my heart and conscience are calloused.

I know I’m in a perilous situation and I don’t know what to do. I say all these things but in real life I know I’m also a jerk and my behaviors are so bad. I fail to love others every moment. I feel like I made myself a slave to sin and that’s why I act the way I do and I’ll die in my sins. I don’t believe god is drawing me anymore and I don’t believe he’s calling me to repentance anymore either. I’ve tried changing my ways but my heart and mind and soul isn’t in it and it’s not sincere. I’ve been like this for years but I decided to do something and pay attention to my condition finally a year ago and now I’m still stuck. I did everything I could to sever myself from Christ so I don’t think there’s any hope. Also im not sure any prayers can help me either because my sins might also be sins that lead to death.

You mentioned Hebrews 6 in your post, well there is some good news. The cross covers a lifetime of sins:

Heb 9:27-28 And as it is appointed for men to die once, but after this the judgment, so Christ was offered once to bear the sins of many.

This means that when Hebrews 6 states:

Heb 6:6 if they fall away, to renew them again to repentance, since they crucify again for themselves the Son of God, and put Him to an open shame.

The cross covers a whole life time of sins
The sinner mentioned in Hebrews 6 is crucifying Christ a second time
The second cross figuratively can only be in a second life
Hebrews 6 is talking about a person who died in their sins.
Because you are still alive, you can be saved.

To back this up the following scripture states that if you have not died in your sin God still wants your restoration:

1Jn 5:16 If anyone sees his brother sinning a sin which does not lead to death, he will ask, and He will give him life for those who commit sin not leading to death. There is sin leading to death. I do not say that he should pray about that.

God's goodness and saving power is not based upon how good you have been but how good He is.

1Jn 1:9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

This does not mean you can continue on being dark, careless, and sinful. You must allow God to refresh your soul, to cleanse it of any dark power. WHen we have wallowed in sin the devil does not give up easy, you may need a fight, but it is worth it.

 

[Sharon Hayes]

Out of the abundance of the heart the crap can flow. Work on purifying your soul by forgiving those (from however long ago) who dragged you there, then forgiving yourself for allowing them energy to remain. That will help you build strength so God can help you overcome. Whatever has been done cannot be undone, so forgive yourself and move forward. Sin is the greatest test in life, so start winning, in Jesus' name.

 

[ladodgers6]

I still have a somewhat love of sin and I can’t fully grasp gods holiness like I used to and I have a hard heart that is somewhat hostile to god. I also acknowledge that I do fear being held accountable by others and even church rebuke which is why I doubt I am sincere.

This just hit me as I was thinking about you. This is from the Heidelberg Catechism. I hold dear to it, and I try to read as often as I can.I hope this brings you peace in the name of Christ.

Q.	How are you righteous before God?​
A.	Only by true faith in Jesus Christ. 1 Although my conscience accuses me that I have grievously sinned against all God's commandments, have never kept any of them, 2 and am still inclined to all evil, 3 yet God, without any merit of my own, 4 out of mere grace, 5 imputes to me the perfect satisfaction, righteousness, and holiness of Christ. 6 He grants these to me as if I had never had nor committed any sin, and as if I myself had accomplished all the obedience which Christ has rendered for me, 7 if only I accept this gift with a believing heart. 8
	1.Rom 3:21-28; Gal 2:16; Eph 2:8, 9; Phil 3:8-11. 2.Rom 3:9, 10. 3.Rom 7:23. 4.Deut 9:6; Ezek 36:22; Tit 3:4, 5. 5.Rom 3:24; Eph 2:8. 6.Rom 4:3-5; 2 Cor 5:17-19; 1 Jn 2:1, 2. 7.Rom 4:24, 25; 2 Cor 5:21. 8.Jn 3:18; Acts 16:30, 31; Rom 3:22.

 

[TGGIL]

Brother and Sister,
The closer we come to know that God is forever present and always in love with his children, that is you and I, the easier it is to recognize our sinful nature. Knowing that you recognize your sinful nature and fear your letting God our Father down, is all the love you can give in your present body of mind. No one is perfect, we all sin. Jesus lived a perfect life because God became our flesh by a living example that we can overcome our present outcomings by living the same life intended for all God's children. But, brother will slay brother, and that no one can cease but God. Just love one another while living in a physical hell, but realize the tree of life which is the fruit of God to eat has been guarded from us for reason given from God, "why leave my fruit of life freely available to eat and you will still keep sinning in your ways. You will live forever sinning. Your forgiveness for being born to sin is God had to come in the flesh and show us we can be saved by knowing we are sinners by confessing to God that we are aware of our hellish ways. We are forgiven by faith, blood, water and love. The blood and water is physical substance but spiritual needs to be a child with God.
Yes we keep sinning and know we do. What destruction of oneself to sin and know it and continue to sin repeatedly for self gain. There is your question? Do we sin because we don't understand or to gain for ourself? To know and believe God is to also to know sin and think of God before you commit sin. Thinking that your Father will feel ashamed of you is believing God is watching, thus you believe without seeing. Keep well children, we all sin, we just want to be sure God is watching and be mindful that our actions should only affect you and God. If you sin to affect others keeping God away from anyone including yourself, your just eating from the knowledge tree and God put it there to be eaten. Eat pleasantly, drink friendly, be a kind person.
TGGIL.

 

[Phil_D]

Hi Lia'socks,

Just know as long as you don't give up on God and are willing to repent and obey him on his terms, then he will always be happy to have you turn to him. The parable of the prodigal son is a prime example (Luke 15: 11-32). Also, I would refer you to Philippians 3:12 - 14: "12 Not that I have already attained,[c] or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. 13 Brethren, I do not count myself to have [d]apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, 14 I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus."