Heard 'God' said that 'John' was my husband...texted him and he was very rude to me

[InThePottersChamber]

Hi, around two days ago, as I was dozing off, I heard, not audibly, but in my heart, God said 'you already know your husband.' So I shot him a few names and when I mentioned 'John' (not his real name) God said yes, it was John.

I hadn't kept in touch with John for a year, but I do remember that the times we met he was a gentleman, gave off harmless 'vibes', but because of his family background he had a lot of baggage and issues, and also because I didn't find him particularly handsome (good looks are important to me), I never quite viewed him in a 'potential husband' light.

Anyway, the next day, I shot a message to John, asking him how he was, and then I finally asked him if he had any feelings for me. So, I've learnt that John since we met, had started his own company, and also had become rude af, accusing me of all kinds of things like using him, being rude and obnoxious, and said a few really chauvinistic things. If anyone wants to say I deserve his accusations because i hadn't texted him for a year, I think it works both ways, if he had texted me first I wouldn't have ignored him.

Obviously, I got my answer, it wasn't 'God' I was hearing from... Keep in mind, I might have friendzoned the dude, but I've always been really nice and warm towards him, he had no reason to treat me like the enemy. I didn't get angry cause I know his mother neglected and abused him and so did his sister, hence why I said he had a lot of baggage, I expected him to be this way to be frank, the first time I spoke to him, despite his 'harmlessness', it was so obvious, by what he implied (in his really mild voice) he resented women in general because they neglected, abused and mistreated him for almost his whole life.

So this is my question, who was I hearing from? I'm sure it wasn't myself...although, I was praying a few days earlier for a spouse. This was the first time I really 'heard' God 'speak' to me, and it turned out it wasn't? Anyone with similar experiences and would like to share?

 

[com7fy8]

Well, I don't know if God told you he is your husband, or not. How John reacted, at first, might not mean anything.

But thank you for trusting us with such a personal thing. May we please be good with you, about this.

God knew this would happen. And in case He did tell you this, He is able to change John.

But I can imagine what it could be like for a guy to hear from you after a whole year, and in your first conversation you ask if he has feelings for you.

Even so . . . it is good to test.

"Test all things; hold fast what is good." (1 Thessalonians 5:21)

And if he is not so attractive and you tend to prefer someone nicer looking, this could be a good test to get you praying and evaluating how you evaluate a man.

I have been quite able to be attracted to a woman by her beauty and charm. But that has never worked out, after my wanting to marry maybe more than thirty women!

Yes, I have gone crazy for too much of my life.

But now I have a lady who can be so sweet and good with anyone, not only me. And I can feel attraction at times to other women, but the gentle and quiet love I have with her is so obviously better than the attraction sort of affection I still can experience at times for other women.

He needs to find out how to love, I would say. And you can help him, if God really wants you together.

Or, you could get with a very attractive guy, but be wise to how that needs to not be what really attracts you to him.

What seems to have worked for us is we both want to share in God's word with each other. We share with each other about our personal things, and help one another with practical things, like washing dishes; we do not try to stay independent.

And we help each other to help people who are seniors and isolated and needing transportation and companionship and money. She is very sweet and kind in how she relates with such needy people. And Jesus wants us to love any and all people; He sacrificed Himself for this, even leaving Heaven to reach and share with us; so I look for this in a woman, as a basic.

And I keep discovering maybe a pattern, how when I am affected by attraction for a woman, it can turn out that she is not all-loving and tenderly caring and sensitive. But my sweetheart does minister for me to love better than with attraction's sort of affection.

So, there is intimacy that is better than physical closeness which attraction can get you into. And God's word . . . any scripture . . . can help us with this. Plus, we have God's mature couples and singles who can feed us with this.

 

[tturt]

Would also caution about the looks requirement because appearance can change in a second - sickness, accident, etc Yours or his.

Based on a study, this is a suggested list to test all things " (1 Thessalonians 5:21)
-check it against Scripture (Acts 17:11), of course this won't be stated
-ask for confirmation (Matt 18:16; Acts 9;9-19 especially v 10-12; II Cor 13:1)
-fasting and praying, (Judges 20:26-27)
-spiritual discernment, (Gal 2:9)
-does it point to Yeshua, (Rev 19:10)
-receive G_dly counsel (Prov 11:14).

There are numerous books, articles, sermons about hearing God's voice. Don't know what denomination is your base but Gateway Church, Robert Morris, has Biblically based teachings. Would check out several resources. We all need to learn to hear Him - a vital part of being
In the Potter's Chamber.

 

[InThePottersChamber]

Well, I don't know if God told you he is your husband, or not. How John reacted, at first, might not mean anything.

But thank you for trusting us with such a personal thing. May we please be good with you, about this.

God knew this would happen. And in case He did tell you this, He is able to change John.

But I can imagine what it could be like for a guy to hear from you after a whole year, and in your first conversation you ask if he has feelings for you.

Even so . . . it is good to test.

"Test all things; hold fast what is good." (1 Thessalonians 5:21)

And if he is not so attractive and you tend to prefer someone nicer looking, this could be a good test to get you praying and evaluating how you evaluate a man.

I have been quite able to be attracted to a woman by her beauty and charm. But that has never worked out, after my wanting to marry maybe more than thirty women!

Yes, I have gone crazy for too much of my life.

But now I have a lady who can be so sweet and good with anyone, not only me. And I can feel attraction at times to other women, but the gentle and quiet love I have with her is so obviously better than the attraction sort of affection I still can experience at times for other women.

He needs to find out how to love, I would say. And you can help him, if God really wants you together.

Or, you could get with a very attractive guy, but be wise to how that needs to not be what really attracts you to him.

What seems to have worked for us is we both want to share in God's word with each other. We share with each other about our personal things, and help one another with practical things, like washing dishes; we do not try to stay independent.

And we help each other to help people who are seniors and isolated and needing transportation and companionship and money. She is very sweet and kind in how she relates with such needy people. And Jesus wants us to love any and all people; He sacrificed Himself for this, even leaving Heaven to reach and share with us; so I look for this in a woman, as a basic.

And I keep discovering maybe a pattern, how when I am affected by attraction for a woman, it can turn out that she is not all-loving and tenderly caring and sensitive. But my sweetheart does minister for me to love better than with attraction's sort of affection.

So, there is intimacy that is better than physical closeness which attraction can get you into. And God's word . . . any scripture . . . can help us with this. Plus, we have God's mature couples and singles who can feed us with this.

I don't agree that i don't have to find the man attractive if i were to choose him as a spouse. You cannot lie that you'd never get with a woman who you aren't attracted to, i am willing to bet, even if your current wife wasn't as attractive as those other girls you mentioned, you were at least on some level attracted to her physically. I think men need to realize women aren't so different to them, and many women would only marry someone whom they find attractive, no matter what they (the women) say or claim. Maybe you can't understand what your female friend sees in that guy she is dating, if purely based on beauty, cause his nose is bigger than a radish, but who knows, maybe it's his Tom Cruise eyes that she noticed, and that had her falling for him, and because he isn't attractive, they say that 'oh girls go for the personality.' Personally I never believed this. You might not find her boyfriend handsome but she has different tastes, she finds him better looking than young Leo, for all you can know.

As for personality, I don't believe in 'marrying someone sweet and kind' either. I think even the most obnoxious snow queen can turn into snow white if she were with the right man, with a man she finds attractive, wealthy, or whatever traits that she may like and choose to respect. And the same goes for men. I think the most arrogant piece of b*m fluff would become a humble servant if he finds the right woman for him, according to him.

The truth is, this is the second time I am hearing from God about this, and I think I may be wrong either way. I had an on and off relationship with another man, let's call him Greg, I was on and off with him for six years, and I still want him to be my husband, even if I don't feel a connection with him anymore, it's what six years of being together can do to you. Loving him is like entering a fond childhood garden, and when I first met Greg, I thought God told me it was him, Greg. The first time I spoke to Greg, it flashed right past my brain, "I'm talking to my husband." I felt like I knew Greg all his life, I even had flashes of his childhood in my brain.

Problem is Greg has commitment issues, and his family has aristocratic blood, I shudder when I think of marrying Greg, my in laws will have me positively murdered lol. Greg has broken off engagement to other women 4 times, I know what it looks like to you guys and girls, all right, but I love Greg. He is sweet, so so sweet.

I'm at a point where I'm fine if God gave me to someone other than Greg. but at the same time I don't think I would want to give John another chance, I really think that people don't change. And like I said, I don't feel attracted to him. To be frank though, John is actually quite handsome, he's above average, to be honest, i really think it is his personality i cannot deal with. I did say, I did not find him 'particularly handsome', but he was handsome, to put it that way.

Thank you to all who replied.

 

[timewerx]

So this is my question, who was I hearing from? I'm sure it wasn't myself...although, I was praying a few days earlier for a spouse. This was the first time I really 'heard' God 'speak' to me, and it turned out it wasn't? Anyone with similar experiences and would like to share?

It could be God but.......

For you to marry "John" in the future many not have been God's intention but to teach you a lesson in something.

God's "little voice" also led me to one woman who caused a dramatic change in my life. I thought God wanted us to be together but it wasn't His intention. Nonetheless it changed me forever in positive terms. I became a seeker of the Truth because of it.

 

[InThePottersChamber]

It could be God but.......

For you to marry "John" in the future many not have been God's intention but to teach you a lesson in something.

God's "little voice" also led me to one woman who caused a dramatic change in my life. I thought God wanted us to be together but it wasn't His intention. Nonetheless it changed me forever in positive terms. I became a seeker of the Truth because of it.

Hi TimeWerx! Nice to hear from you again, don't know if you recall but we chatted for a bit a few years back.

I agree with you, I think God is trying to teach me that not every 'voice' or 'thought' comes from Him. This was the first thing that hit me, that God was trying to teach me not every sound or voice is from Him, I think He's saving me a lot of future embarrassment and heartbreak. I truly thought it was God who told me about John, and it turned out to be false, so surely God is making sure I don't make a fool out of myself each time I think I heard something, going to another country soon, away from friends and family, so I can see why God decided to teach this to me.

Have a great day.

 

[timewerx]

Hi TimeWerx! Nice to hear from you again, don't know if you recall but we chatted for a bit a few years back.

I agree with you, I think God is trying to teach me that not every 'voice' or 'thought' comes from Him. This was the first thing that hit me, that God was trying to teach me not every sound or voice is from Him, I think He's saving me a lot of future embarrassment and heartbreak. I truly thought it was God who told me about John, and it turned out to be false, so surely God is making sure I don't make a fool out of myself each time I think I heard something, going to another country soon, away from friends and family, so I can see why God decided to teach this to me.

Have a great day.

Hi Potter! I remember you and do know we have chatted but can't remember the chats themselves. Sorry, poor memory.

I still listen to God/Holy Spirit. Couple months ago, Jesus told me in a dream that I'm already married even though I never been married in reality. I thought it made sense because I don't have to worry about it anymore! Maybe He just wants me to stay single but not sure.

Anyway, you'll be fine going to another country alone to work. I had experienced it myself once. Triggered major anxiety but I got over it. I made new friends. It's an opportunity for an adventure, treasure it.