Going to church alone is getting old!

[Changed]

Sorry,I'm usually not a whiner,but am just down about alot tonight! For 10yrs I keep saying "in God's time" in God's time he will come to the Lord"
Well as the yrs go by he seems to be getting further and further away spiritually! Seems like everything lies on me! the prayers for our kids,our future etc are all dependent on me(my prayers)! I'm jealous when i see other christian families/couples go to church together,pray together etc. Reading how some other hubbies treat their wives here,I can't complain to much on our relationship aspect-but there is such a big spiritual void! *Sigh*

 

[Southern Cross]

This is going to sound like bribing him. Mos men are open to bribing if there is food involved . Have you thought about facilitating a friendship between your husband and another guy at church who shares the same interests or needs your husband's expertise in something??

"Hey, John said to say hi and he wanted to thank you for the advice you gave him about fixing his brakes". It might work. Some guys need another motive to attend, maybe head out to lunch after the service with another couple, etc. Eventually, some guys "get it". Some ladies do, too!

 

[KleinerApfel]

Sorry,I'm usually not a whiner,but am just down about alot tonight! For 10yrs I keep saying "in God's time" in God's time he will come to the Lord"
Well as the yrs go by he seems to be getting further and further away spiritually! Seems like everything lies on me! the prayers for our kids,our future etc are all dependent on me(my prayers)! I'm jealous when i see other christian families/couples go to church together,pray together etc. Reading how some other hubbies treat their wives here,I can't complain to much on our relationship aspect-but there is such a big spiritual void! *Sigh*

Hello there Changed,


I find I have "seasons" when things seem to go better or worse for a while. the only thing that's certain is that nothing ever stays the same! (Except the Lord Himself of course!)

I've been married 23 years and saved about 12 years, so can sympathise with your waiting and praying.
It's hard to see other couples who are committed to Jesus and living that out, but I find it an inspiration too; reminds me what I'm longing, hoping and praying for.

I used to pray that my husband would come to the Lord in time for us to raise our daughter in a wholly Christian home. She's in her mid-teens now, so I would love it to happen before she leaves for university or whatever.

What I find hard is when a Christian couple don't seem to be making the most of the priviledge - maybe not getting involved in the life of the church, one of them a bit luke-warm and holding the other back, or not praying together because they're shy etc. That makes me sad.

I'm not unusual in my church for the women to come alone.
We have very few strong Christian couples sadly, but at least I don't feel out on a limb.

Can you get together with any other U/Y women to study, pray, fellowship? I think that's the greatest help when we're feeling discouraged.

Keep praying as you are able; wait and trust in Him. Let God carry you through the bad days, and just tell Him you trust Him.
Soon He will renew your strength. Even the little whisper you manage when you're feeling dried up is very precious.

God bless, Susana

 

[Changed]

Sad thing is,I've even had brother's in the church tell me over and over.."I'm gonna stop by and talk to your hubby" and none ever did

He has gotten to the point where he doesn't even want to attend the plays,or special functions! It's so obvious that when he is in church he feels out of place!

TheLordismy banner~ I often wonder why saved couples don't take advantage of things like praying together etc! Oh well, all I can do is continue to pray.

 

[Southern Cross]

Then hold them accountable. If they say they'll come over, break out the date book and say, "Okay, what day and time?" That'll make anyone think twice about making empty promises. What state do you live in? Maybe someone here can help out, get together for dinner with y'all or something similar. Yes, you'd be giving up the anonymity of the internet, but it might work.

 

[Changed]

Actually that was at my last church,and I know fewer people here!

 

[Karen Fergusson]

Sorry,I'm usually not a whiner,but am just down about alot tonight! For 10yrs I keep saying "in God's time" in God's time he will come to the Lord"
Well as the yrs go by he seems to be getting further and further away spiritually! Seems like everything lies on me! the prayers for our kids,our future etc are all dependent on me(my prayers)! I'm jealous when i see other christian families/couples go to church together,pray together etc. Reading how some other hubbies treat their wives here,I can't complain to much on our relationship aspect-but there is such a big spiritual void! *Sigh*

Oh Changed, I wish I could hug you, and bring u comfort in your spirit. Be encouraged by His word, I pray that God will send U and your hubby the fellowship that you desire & His will be done.

 

[eyeliv4God]

Have you casually mentioned maybe going to a Christmas service? David claims to be agnostic but I told him that when I get to New York (I live in Indiana and am going there for my Christmas vacation), I'd like to attend a church service when I'm there and told him he didn't have to go and he automatically assumed that he was going and even said he'd like to go!

 

[MaryAlaina]

Just having him in church next to you doesn't mean he will care about anything spiritual. Mine goes to church with me every Sunday, but will not even discuss the sermon with me afterward!

 

[E_Powers]

worry on your self spiritually , continue top go to church and seek the lord your self .
by reading the bible regularly and have patience. god will give you the wisdom to win his heart for god if you try any the way without god you will fail.

 

[KleinerApfel]

worry on your self spiritually , continue top go to church and seek the lord your self .
by reading the bible regularly and have patience. god will give you the wisdom to win his heart for god if you try any the way without god you will fail.

More and more I am coming back to this myself.
After 12 years of this situation there seems nothing I can do to help my husband spiritually. Except of course walk close to the Lord myself and pray deeply and continually, which in fact is everything in the spiritual battle.

It's hard, and sometimes it seems too hard. But at those times I just have to be patient and know that at least God never grows weary of waiting for him to come. He will carry us through the rough times and bring times of refreshment on the journey.

God bless, Susana

 

[pete56]

Susana

I know what you mean, I too have come to the conclusion that all I can do is keep close to the Lord, remain patient, prayerful and open to my wife, whilst the Lord works in her life.

I have to say it is often not as easy as those words seem to make it look! But the lesson keeps coming around for me and even stubborn people like me have to listen to the Lord eventually!!

Bless you all and stay patient, the Lord's timing IS always right!

Pete

 

[KleinerApfel]

Thanks Pete. It's good to encourage each other here.

Blessings, Susana

 

[joyousliving]

Just having him in church next to you doesn't mean he will care about anything spiritual. Mine goes to church with me every Sunday, but will not even discuss the sermon with me afterward!

Changed -

I was so happy when my hubby started going to church with us. I am happy now that he doesn't go.

Mary Alaina is right. They can come with and sit there, but if they do not hear what is being said you are only kidding yourself. You want to be married to a man who loves God and wants to be the spiritual leader of the home. His church attendance will not give you that. He thinks he is giving you what you want by going because he cannot fully understand what it is you are looking for.

Go to church enjoy the service and use the time to recharge. Forget about who is sitting next to you and worship God.

Keep praying that God will touch your husband's heart.

 

[Chrystal-J]

Changed -

I was so happy when my hubby started going to church with us. I am happy now that he doesn't go.

I feel that way about my husband. I actually enjoy church more when he doesn't go because then I don't have to listen to his bored sighs and watch his twisting around in an attempt to see the clock at the back of the church (to see how quickly he can get back home to his television, I guess....)
I just decided to go to church alone or with my son and leave it at that--because it was too draining to keep asking him to go--and when he finally does, he acts like it's such a "chore". That takes away from the joy of the service for me--it's sad, but that's how I feel. I was sick for so long and now that I'm back to church, I want to feel good about it--not rushed through it or constantly distracted by my husband's lack of interest.
I'm going to keeping hoping and praying for a change in his attitude, but it's really up to him in the end.
Take Care All!
Chrystal

 

[Child of JC]

Sorry,I'm usually not a whiner,but am just down about alot tonight! For 10yrs I keep saying "in God's time" in God's time he will come to the Lord"
Well as the yrs go by he seems to be getting further and further away spiritually! Seems like everything lies on me! the prayers for our kids,our future etc are all dependent on me(my prayers)! I'm jealous when i see other christian families/couples go to church together,pray together etc. Reading how some other hubbies treat their wives here,I can't complain to much on our relationship aspect-but there is such a big spiritual void! *Sigh*

Diddo.