Funny moments in the Bible

[tonychanyt]

There is a one-liner in Leviticus 13:

40 If a man’s hair falls out from his head, he is bald; he is clean.

KJV, Proverbs 21:

9 It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.

A prophet and his talking donkey in Numbers 22:

26 Then the angel of the Lord moved on ahead and stood in a narrow place where there was no room to turn, either to the right or to the left. 27 When the donkey saw the angel of the Lord, it lay down under Balaam, and he was angry and beat it with his staff. 28 Then the Lord opened the donkey’s mouth, and it said to Balaam, “What have I done to you to make you beat me these three times?”
29Balaam answered the donkey, “You have made a fool of me! If only I had a sword in my hand, I would kill you right now.”
30 The donkey said to Balaam, “Am I not your own donkey, which you have always ridden, to this day? Have I been in the habit of doing this to you?”
“No,” he said.

The confrontation between Elijah and Baal's prophets was pretty funny. 1 Kings 18:

25 Elijah said to the prophets of Baal, “Choose one of the bulls and prepare it first, since there are so many of you. Call on the name of your god, but do not light the fire.” 26 So they took the bull given them and prepared it.
Then they called on the name of Baal from morning till noon. “Baal, answer us!” they shouted. But there was no response; no one answered. And they danced around the altar they had made.
27 At noon Elijah began to taunt them. “Shout louder!” he said. “Surely he is a god! Perhaps he is deep in thought, or busy, or traveling. Maybe he is sleeping and must be awakened.” 28 So they shouted louder and slashed themselves with swords and spears, as was their custom, until their blood flowed. 29Midday passed, and they continued their frantic prophesying until the time for the evening sacrifice. But there was no response, no one answered, no one paid attention.

David was in a tight spot many times. How did he get out of the next one?

I Samuel 21:

13 So he [David] pretended to be insane in their [King Achish] presence; and while he was in their hands he acted like a madman, making marks on the doors of the gate and letting saliva run down his beard.
14 Achish said to his servants, “Look at the man! He is insane! Why bring him to me? 15 Am I so short of madmen that you have to bring this fellow here to carry on like this in front of me? Must this man come into my house?”

There is dramatic irony concerning the person of Jesus in Luke 24:

19 “What things?” he [Jesus] asked.
“About Jesus of Nazareth,” they replied. “He was a prophet, powerful in word and deed before God and all the people.

They were talking about Jesus right in front of Jesus without knowing it. This is a close encounter of the funny kind.

See also

• Peter's angel
• Why did Jesus intend to walk on the water past the disciples' boat?
• Nineveh and fish

 

[AlexB23]

There is a one-liner in Leviticus 13:


KJV, Proverbs 21:


A prophet and his talking donkey in Numbers 22:


The confrontation between Elijah and Baal's prophets was pretty funny. 1 Kings 18:


David was in a tight spot many times. How did he get out of the next one?

I Samuel 21:


There is dramatic irony concerning the person of Jesus in Luke 24:


They were talking about Jesus right in front of Jesus without knowing it. This is a close encounter of the funny kind.

See also

• Peter's angel
• Why did Jesus intend to walk on the water past the disciples' boat?
• Nineveh and fish

Here are some more funny verses.


Just remember that humor in religious texts can be subjective and culturally influenced, but there are some Bible verses that have been interpreted as displaying God's or the Bible's sense of humor:

1. Genesis 18:2-15 (The Visitors to Abraham): In this passage, three men appear to Abraham under the oak tree near Mamre. Abraham rushes to prepare a meal for them, but only two actually eat. The third remains standing. Later, it is revealed that one of the men was God himself, and the other two were angels. This story can be seen as humorous because of the unexpected twist in the identity of the visitors, Abraham's eagerness to entertain them, and the fact that only two actually partake in the meal. [Unexpected humor]

2. 1 Samuel 17:42-51 (David and Goliath): This well-known story involves a young shepherd boy named David who volunteers to fight the giant Philistine warrior Goliath. When Goliath taunts the Israelites, David responds by mocking him with a series of insults and challenging him to a one-on-one fight. The humor in this passage comes from the unlikely hero and the absurdity of a boy defeating a giant warrior. [Absurd humor]

3. 2 Samuel 11:14-17 (David and Uriah): In this passage, King David sends his army to battle while he stays behind to commit adultery with Bathsheba. When he learns that she is pregnant, he concocts a plan to cover up his indiscretion by having her husband Uriah killed in battle. One night, however, Uriah refuses to go home to sleep with his wife, so David orders him to be placed at the front of the battle line where he will almost certainly be killed. The humor in this situation comes from the irony of David's actions – sending his soldiers into harm's way while he stays behind to commit adultery and arrange for someone else's death. [Dark humor]

 

[AV1611VET]

Luke 18:9 And he spake this parable unto certain which trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and despised others:
10 Two men went up into the temple to pray; the one a Pharisee, and the other a publican.
11 The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as other men are, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican.
12 I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of all that I possess.
13 And the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto heaven, but smote upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner.
14 I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other: for every one that exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.

Notice God cuts off the Pharisee?

As if to say, "Enough of this!"

 

[AV1611VET]

Deuteronomy 23:12 Thou shalt have a place also without the camp, whither thou shalt go forth abroad:
13 And thou shalt have a paddle upon thy weapon; and it shall be, when thou wilt ease thyself abroad, thou shalt dig therewith, and shalt turn back and cover that which cometh from thee:
14 For the LORD thy God walketh in the midst of thy camp, to deliver thee, and to give up thine enemies before thee; therefore shall thy camp be holy: that he see no unclean thing in thee, and turn away from thee.