Elopement?

[newleaf]

Do you support couples eloping, to get married?

 

[New_Wineskin]

Absolutely !

 

[LittleladyinChrist]

I dont see anything wrong with it. I would hope it isnt a way of just doing what we feel like doing and not waiting on the Lord. But we are each accountable for ourselfs.

 

[talitha]

I agree with the Littlelady. My hubby and I eloped, and I regret it. I am pretty sure we got ahead of ourselves there. I will probably always be sorry, and sad that we didn't get a wedding. However, I don't think there's anything wrong with eloping - it can be a God-thing......

blessings
tal

 

[HeyHomie]

I don't see any problem with it.

 

[DiscipleDave]

Do you support couples eloping, to get married?

If you have to sneak around to get married, then there is already something wrong with the situation.

i am not saying there are not good reasons to elope, only saying that many people elope, because certain people do not approve of the marriage, the question then is, why ? Why do they not approve, can it not be resolved.

Why must they sneak off and get married, to me this just is not a good start for a marriage.

In His Holy and Precious Name, Jesus Christ
DiscipleDave
^i^

 

[whateveristrue]

Many people elope because they don't want to wait 6 months to get married, nor do they have enough money to plan a wedding.

There's nothing wrong with it, as long as their heart is in the right place.

 

[GraceLikeRainFallsDown]

I do not see anything wrong with it.

 

[Jessica Lauren]

If they do it for the "right" reasons... hey knock yourself out!

 

[TieDye]

My husband and I kind of eloped . . . I say kind of because people were aware that we were going to do it, and it wasn't just some, "SURPRISE! WE'RE MARRIED!" thing.

We eloped for the following reasons:

-My parents are both dead and I am not close with most of the rest of my family
-Jordan's family would not be able to travel close to mine for a wedding, mine would not have been able to travel close to his
-Neither of us wanted to spend a lot of money on the wedding; we opted instead to spend the money on the honeymoon
-We both felt sort of like we'd just be paraded around for other people to look at
-Our relationship has always been me, Jordan, and God. We don't like involving lots of people and making it a big show.
-The ceremony itself meant much less to us than the spiritual commitment.
-Getting married, just the two of us, my maid of honor, the pastor, and God, didn't make our marriage worth any less or our commitment any less serious.

 

[JTLauder]

The only problem I see with elopement is that it's often done on impulse, like that drive-through marriage chapel in Las Vegas.
Marriage should be considered seriously. The prolonged waiting period gives you time to plan your lives together and that you're not rushing into something out of only pure passion.

 

[jenneefar]

I see absolutely nothing wrong with elopement.

If a man and a woman wish to marry in privacy, then I believe that they should be allowed without judgement.

 

[Cris413]

Do you support couples eloping, to get married?

I would not "support" a couple to elope. Though I do not see anything wrong with it I do see more right with the process of marriage.

I believe good bible-based pre-marital counselling is a MUST. This helps you seek the Lord in your decision to marry. It helps you set the foundation of your marriage on Him. It also helps you address marital issues before you actually start having them...giving you a better foundation on which to handle them properly according to the Word.

Preparation for the wedding (big or small) helps you with the preparation for the marriage. You can learn a lot about each other in the way you work as a team to plan the wedding.

The wedding itself is a public statement of not only your love for each other but also your love for God. Vows taken before God in the presence of friends and family..."We love each other. We love God and we vow to live our lives together according to His good will and purpose for His glory." Powerful proclamation!

Our wedding was very small, in our living room with only my husband's family as my family is no longer living. Not only were our vows to each other precious but I was thankful for his families witness to our vows that God is the foundation of our union.

Even the invitations to the small reception announced not only our commitment to each other but also our committing our marriage to God.

The Pastor mentioned how much he loves wedding ceremonies because he has the opportunity to share God's word with people who may not otherwise hear it.

Marriage is a sacred and holy union. Not to be entered into lightly on the spur of the moment. I feel there is a blessing in sharing your vows with your friends and family as witness..be it a few or many.

Marriage is heavily under attack (as mentioned in other threads) The divorce rate for believers is right up there with the unsaved.

Believer's going into marriage MUST understand divorce is not an option so any preparation that gives your marriage a stronger foundation on the Lord is time well spent to me.

I'm not saying if you elope your marriage is doomed. I'm saying I do support the preparation, sharing your vows and committing your marriage to God before witnesses is beneficial.

God bless

 

[SWigton87]

My mindset may simply be traditional here, but I would not marry a woman without the blessing of her father. It only seems fair, since she is in fact his flesh and would soon become one with my flesh.

For the same reason, I would expect the same of a young man who would wish to marry my (theoretical) daughter.

 

[Cris413]

My mindset may simply be traditional here, but I would not marry a woman without the blessing of her father. It only seems fair, since she is in fact his flesh and would soon become one with my flesh.

For the same reason, I would expect the same of a young man who would wish to marry my (theoretical) daughter.

God bless your heart young man. I think your traditional approach is WONDERFUL!

 

[BustedFlat]

Many people elope because they don't want to wait 6 months to get married, nor do they have enough money to plan a wedding.

There's nothing wrong with it, as long as their heart is in the right place.

Words mean things:
From Merriam-Webster, Incorporated elope:
Main Entry: elope
Pronunciation: i-'lOp
Function: intransitive verb
Inflected Form(s): eloped; elop·ing
Etymology: Anglo-French aloper, esloper to abduct, run away
1 : to slip away : ESCAPE <might have mistaken him for...some scarecrow eloped from a cornfield -- Washington Irving>
2 a : to run away from one's husband with a lover b : to run away secretly with the intention of getting married usually without parental consent
So you can not by scripture support eloping, not 2b and certinaly not 2a

If their hearts were in the right place they would not need to run away secretly.

Money is not a good reason to run away to get married. I was married by my pastor in my own home with my family as my wittinesses. My pastor did not charge us for his services, nor for the premarital counsellings. We did make a gift to the church, but that was left to God and ourselves to determine. We did have to buy the material we used in the premarital sessions.
The time frame was set by all parties, having to do with the availability of the people to get from where they were to where we needed them to be. We did it within a three month period, but could have done it with a week or two if it was the desire. The fact we had been together for an extended time may have played some in Pastors willingness to go at our pace, but I think it had more to do with our comment to do it Gods way.
If your are getting married today, just on a whim of your own flesh, then I think you have some greater needs of your church and pastor. On the other hand if you are just getting a church marriage to conform to what you think you should do, you have some of those same problems of the flesh.
A wedding should be the celebration of a gift of God to us as humans, not as some sort of flash and dazzle to impress the people. If you want a quiet ceremony that is attended by 2 friends ... or 2 strangers and then you go off on your merry way, fine, but make the commitment to have it centered around God, for his glory. I have no problem with a small quiet wedding, or with a large one for that matter, as long as the center is God and His Word.

In Jesus

BustedFlat

 

[JeanR]

My husband and I talked briefly about eloping, but opted for a small wedding instead. We just didn't want all the hoopla of a big wedding, just wanted something small and personal. We chose not to elope because we knew it would hurt our parents feelings.

We had a very short engagement because we knew the longer the engagement, the bigger the wedding would become. We were only engaged for 2 months and had a very beautiful, intimate wedding with our parents and siblings present.

Now I am on the other side, with our daughter having married, I knew that not eloping was the best thing we could have decided. To watch our beautiful daughter exchange her vows with her loving, godly husband was a precious thing to behold. And, now that my husband has entered the Lord's presence, it has become even more precious. My dear husband was the father of the bride!

 

[Ave Maria]

I see nothing wrong with it.

 

[TieDye]

My mindset may simply be traditional here, but I would not marry a woman without the blessing of her father. It only seems fair, since she is in fact his flesh and would soon become one with my flesh.

For the same reason, I would expect the same of a young man who would wish to marry my (theoretical) daughter.

What if her dad was dead?

My dad gave Jordan his permission on his deathbed. If we had gotten there 2 hours later, Jordan would not have been able to ask.

Things don't always work out the way you plan them.

In my situation, it could not have been done without hurting one family or the other and both families fully supported us doing a "destination wedding" together. They just wanted lots of photos and to see us after we got back.

I see absolutely nothing wrong with that.

 

[Nadiine]

Eloping is fine - but I think other people's feelings should be taken into consideration too.
I don't think eloping isn't for everyone, but it's a good alternative if you just don't want to spend $$thousands$$ for just one day.