I tried again

I just wanted to give an update.

I found the nearest Quaker group about a forty-five minute drive away from. Having a tight budget could make weekly drives to their meeting difficult some weeks. There are just a handful of them, and they extremely politically active as a group. I am personally active politically, but I don't like politics mixed with faith. So I am a bit uncomfortable with that, and I'm trying to work out what I should do as far as my involvement with them.

However, I have begun visiting a Methodist church that is close to my home. I agree with them just enough to float through. It is good for my younger son to go there because they have an after school group which picks students up from his middle school. They also have a choir for his age, which he loves. For the time being he and I will be going there so I can have him plugged in to a church. We can have discussions about the differences of beliefs at home. I believe that after a certain point kids make their own choices about they believe anyway. So it might be good to have a church that isn't lined up with what I believe, but close enough, and he can be exposed to different views.

I find myself in the same situation again.

For an update, my son ended up getting snubbed by the kids his age and refused to go back. I spent some time searching, reading, and watching videos. I ended up coming in contact with a very new congregation that is an odd mix of Pentecostal and Baptists. It is so new they don't have a building yet, and were still meeting in the pastor's home on a weekly basis. I actually became very good friends with the pastor, his spouse, and the core group. Personality wise we are all very compatible. Things began to fizzle out though.

I began seeing some inconsistencies about Scripture use, and there was a lack of Bible Study and prayer meetings. Then there was a thing over money. There was not ever a business meeting that I was aware of and budget was never shown or discussed. A lot of church money was used on entertaining each other with expensive meals out and fun activities, but the funds for a foreign church that's being supported was nothing more than a change collection jar. The building fund was not growing, and the amount they had would never be given when asked. They were not willing to discuss it. The subject was always dismissed and they would begin discussing something else. Overall, these people are really good friends. But they are not a very good church. I have stopped attending the services, and I don't know what to say to them about it because they are not open to communication about it.

I've stayed in contact with them as friends, but lately they have been rather cold and not communicating with me much. They had a booth set up at a recent LGBT pride event, and wanted me to join them to help let people know they would be welcome at the church meetings. I did not go. I had other plans that had been in place for a long time, and I really was not comfortable attending that event for various reasons.

I'm on facebook and I post a lot of church related things (church in general, not about our church specifically), Scripture, and politcal and social justice things. I have a wide range of friends from different socio-economic backgrounds, professions, and religious beliefs. I know some of them personally in real life and some just from online. So, I like to share everything that I see which seems important to share with others in case they don't know about it or have not see or considered a certain perspective.

So, the pastor is one of my facebook friends, and today he posted a thing saying that facebook is not the church, a political campaign or office, and it is not true activism so if you want to be part of something like that, then do it in real life. (paraphrased)

It felt very personal and directed at me. I'm frustrated because he could just talk to me about all of this, instead of passively putting it out there on facebook. I don't do social media drama. I feel like I should talk to him, but I don't believe the conversation would be productive because he isn't of the mind to hear me out.

sigh.

In the meantime, I have begun watching youtube videos of messages from Messianic Jewish pastor Rabbi Schneider. I had become familiar with Messianic Jews several years ago, and was friends with some before I moved away from that area.

I would love to find a church very similar in teaching like Rabbi Schneider. There is one group here about half an hour drive from my home. I feel a little leery about joining them because the group I knew where I lived before was very rigid in attempting to follow Old Testament laws. I don't know yet about this group that is near me. I'm wanting to check them out, but I get nervous when it is close to a service time.

Because of Romans 14:5-6 my take as a Christians following the Old Testament is that we can observe the feasts and holidays if we want, but we don't have to. We are not held firmly to all the Old Testament laws, but it won't hurt anything if we want to try. I believe that Jesus fulfilling the law means we are no longer judged by the law, and that He trumped it all with Matt 22:37-40 "Jesus replied: “ ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."

I have also felt peace and been made more aware of God's blessings by the teachings connecting the New Testament and Old Testament, and by observing some of the Jewish traditions. The cool thing about the feasts and holidays is it is about remembering what God has done, and I have been able to apply that to my own life personally. It is a combination of thanking and honoring God, and helping me emotionally by being more aware of the presence and providence of God.

So, I'd like to find a church like that. I just don't know if I will.