Give "Bad" Advice (3)

sahjimira

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I locked my dogs in the kitchen so I can hopefully get a good nights sleep. I don't mind them sleeping with me but they jump off and on the bed all night if they think they hear anything... or they just like waking me up
 
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lucypevensie

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in very very very sugary and fatty fat dark chocolate

need some cake
The best place to get cake is at a wedding reception. Don't know anyone getting married? That's ok. You can drive around town some Saturday and find the wedding of a stranger. It's not considered wedding crashing as long as you take some cake with you when you leave.

I want to go to a church event on Friday, but a friend asked me to help her pack up her house so she can move on Saturday. Uhh, what to do...
 
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LaSorcia

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I locked my dogs in the kitchen so I can hopefully get a good nights sleep. I don't mind them sleeping with me but they jump off and on the bed all night if they think they hear anything... or they just like waking me up

If you lock the dogs in the kitchen, make sure to leave the fridge open and the lid off the trash can in case they get hungry or bored.
 
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LaSorcia

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The best place to get cake is at a wedding reception. Don't know anyone getting married? That's ok. You can drive around town some Saturday and find the wedding of a stranger. It's not considered wedding crashing as long as you take some cake with you when you leave.

I want to go to a church event on Friday, but a friend asked me to help her pack up her house so she can move on Saturday. Uhh, what to do...

Play that piety card, sister! No point getting a sore back and doing hard physical labour when you can get out of it by doing something 'holy'.

How can I successfully negotiate for a better price from my contractor?
 
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lucypevensie

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No one can say no to chocolate! I bet if you dangle a Hershey bar in front of the contractor's face he'll buckle right then and there.

I wish I could get the family to line their shoes up neatly by the back door instead of them haphazardly kicking them off and letting them land wherever, then just walking away.
 
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lucypevensie

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No no no! You should hand out those Chick tracts that tell of the evils of trick or treating. All those kids will flock to church next Sunday and git saved!

I have to take my car in for a repair, but I am nervous about it dying on me on the way there.
 
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LaSorcia

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I recently tried the Guinness diet. It doesn't take much to make you fall asleep, and then you can't eat other food if you are sleeping. So, I recommend Guinness.

What colours should I decorate my bathroom with?
 
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