You tried. You prayed. God answered: Divorce.

[S.O.J.I.A.]

the LORD would not sanction divorce under any circumstances.

separation is a different story..

 

[Andrew77]

You prayed about it ceaselessly. You cried out to Abba with every ounce of your being. You pled in the name of Jesus. You are sanctified by the Spirit and you're confident you heard His voice right. You searched His Word for answers, you set your heart and mind right before Him. You denied your flesh and picked up your cross.

You tried and tried and tried. You did your absolute best, yielding to the Spirit as much as possible. You did not want divorce.

When you prayed, the Lord himself in His still small voice led you to separation. (And perhaps eventually divorce.)

Does this ever happen? Would God, the Lord of Heavenly hosts who sits upon His throne, the Holy One of Israel, ever tell one of His beloved children to choose divorce?

please, tell me your story...

Divorce is never the plan. But Divorce is sometimes a reality.

I think sometimes Christians forget that if G-d was in the Business of just forcing people to obey his will, then Jesus would never have died on the cross. After all, if G-d forced us to follow him, there would be no sin, and thus no reason for Jesus to die for our sins.

So G-d doesn't force us to follow him. Which means inherently, that sometimes things outside of his plan happen. Like Divorce.

You can pray until the end of time, but at some point that other person will make a choice between the will of G-d, and their own will.

G-d will not force people to do what they should.

That said, don't read that as doom. You should be meeting with women or men at the church, and praying for your spouse. It is my opinion that too many people never get with others and pray for their spouses, and thus many answers to prayer never happen.

 

[bèlla]

I don’t expect perfection in the world or my relationships. Nor will I uphold every precept God established. It isn’t possible.

I can only account for my morality. I may have some measure of influence on my partner. But I can’t absolve his weaknesses and he can’t magically remove mine.

It’s inevitable in the course of our relationship when we will both experience pain and sadness. The degree of our suffering and its impact can’t quantified. Our forbearance is directly impacted by makeup, experiences, and condition of arrival.

What one person deems intolerable another prepares to stick out. I won’t randomly state what should occur. There are too many nuances that influence the best course.

Parting may not be what one prefers but in the circumstances you face and the other person’s willingness or refusal to work towards a resolution; a timeout may be a necessary step.

In a perfect world all vows could be sustained until death. But the absence of perfection and idealistic influences leads me to think otherwise.

God hates divorce and dislikes many things as we’re shown in the word. I am going to disappoint Him, my spouse, and myself more than I prefer. To berate myself or the other person for failing is counterproductive. Sometimes we rebound from a fall and sometimes we can’t.

 

[Dave L]

You prayed about it ceaselessly. You cried out to Abba with every ounce of your being. You pled in the name of Jesus. You are sanctified by the Spirit and you're confident you heard His voice right. You searched His Word for answers, you set your heart and mind right before Him. You denied your flesh and picked up your cross.

You tried and tried and tried. You did your absolute best, yielding to the Spirit as much as possible. You did not want divorce.

When you prayed, the Lord himself in His still small voice led you to separation. (And perhaps eventually divorce.)

Does this ever happen? Would God, the Lord of Heavenly hosts who sits upon His throne, the Holy One of Israel, ever tell one of His beloved children to choose divorce?

please, tell me your story...

““For I hate divorce,” says the Lord, the God of Israel, “and him who covers his garment with wrong,” says the Lord of hosts. “So take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously.”” Malachi 2:16 (NASB95)

“For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband. So then if, while her husband liveth, she be married to another man, she shall be called an adulteress: but if her husband be dead, she is free from that law; so that she is no adulteress, though she be married to another man.” Romans 7:2–3 (KJV 1900)

 

[FutureAndAHope]

You prayed about it ceaselessly. You cried out to Abba with every ounce of your being. You pled in the name of Jesus. You are sanctified by the Spirit and you're confident you heard His voice right. You searched His Word for answers, you set your heart and mind right before Him. You denied your flesh and picked up your cross.

You tried and tried and tried. You did your absolute best, yielding to the Spirit as much as possible. You did not want divorce.

When you prayed, the Lord himself in His still small voice led you to separation. (And perhaps eventually divorce.)

Does this ever happen? Would God, the Lord of Heavenly hosts who sits upon His throne, the Holy One of Israel, ever tell one of His beloved children to choose divorce?

please, tell me your story...

It really depends what is going on in the relationship. If there was physical violence involved, and you were being threatened by the relationship, then I can see that God would ask you for your own protection to separate. But if it is just you are not happy with the relationship then no he would not. When Israel begged for a king, God was not happy, but he gave into their request. The prophets of God often answered people according to their desire, before giving them the Word of God. As an example one prophet said to a king "Go to battle you will surely prosper", but when the king made him answer truthfully, he said "no the LORD says you will perish". Just because you are a Christian, and can hear God's voice, it does not mean that what you hear is God's will or word to you. If your desire is getting in the way, you may be hearing your desire not God's will.

 

[NothingIsImpossible]

God would not have a couple divorce. Oftentimes someone who thinks God is telling them to divorce is really their own voice in their head telling them that it's God because they truly just want to divorce him and the marriage so the stress goes away. I'm just saying this in general of course

 

[Alfred1963]

You prayed about it ceaselessly. You cried out to Abba with every ounce of your being. You pled in the name of Jesus. You are sanctified by the Spirit and you're confident you heard His voice right. You searched His Word for answers, you set your heart and mind right before Him. You denied your flesh and picked up your cross.

You tried and tried and tried. You did your absolute best, yielding to the Spirit as much as possible. You did not want divorce.

When you prayed, the Lord himself in His still small voice led you to separation. (And perhaps eventually divorce.)

Does this ever happen? Would God, the Lord of Heavenly hosts who sits upon His throne, the Holy One of Israel, ever tell one of His beloved children to choose divorce?

please, tell me your story...

Yes. He did it twice, in Ezra and Hosea. And our Lord does not ask us to sin. That means divorce, in and of itself, is not a sin. What is a sin is going against God's will.
If you are struggling with guilt or pressure from others about divorce, I highly recommend this new book on the topic - When God Allows Divorce - as it explains what God, Jesus, Moses and Paul really said about divorce. My prayers are with you.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07VD1181...llows+divorce&qid=1563736486&s=gateway&sr=8-1

 

[Alfred1963]

Christians need to accept that divorce, in and of itself, is not a sin. Being out of God's will is a sin. Getting married without God's blessing is just as much a sin as getting a divorce without first being led on the matter by God. Yes. God does allow divorce. He did twice in the Old Testament: Ezra and Hosea.
If you are struggling with guilt for a pending or past divorce, I would highly recommend this new book: When God Allows Divorce.
Here is the link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07VD1181...llows+divorce&qid=1563736486&s=gateway&sr=8-1

Al

 

[Healing with Jesus]

Christians need to accept that divorce, in and of itself, is not a sin. Being out of God's will is a sin. Getting married without God's blessing is just as much a sin as getting a divorce without first being led on the matter by God. Yes. God does allow divorce. He did twice in the Old Testament: Ezra and Hosea.
If you are struggling with guilt for a pending or past divorce, I would highly recommend this new book: When God Allows Divorce.
Here is the link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07VD1181...llows+divorce&qid=1563736486&s=gateway&sr=8-1

Al

Thank you, brother. Your message couldn't have come at a better time for me.

I'm amazed and frankly disgusted at the vile oppression taught that God never allows divorce in any circumstance. I heard my Father's voice. But I was surprised and confused, hence my questions. And then 85% of the answers I got said no, never divorce, and I grappled with it for weeks. And keep in mind, these people don't even know my circumstance! It's not good, at all.

Silly me... I should know to listen to my shepherd's voice. I need no man to confirm it. I have to confess this and repent of it.

Frankly, I have been on my way to death. I have been for months and it's at that critical point now. My survival depended on my leaving, I have professionals including doctors, lawyers, domestic violence advocates, and counselors who can confirm this. My mother literally rescued me and whisked me away. Thank God!

I haven't started the divorce process, but I just took the first step of getting out. Sadly, I know this man will never change. So divorce is the only way I'll be free. Even if I never marry again (and of course that means being celibate), that's ok with me at this point. I just want to be free of the bondage I've been trapped in for 10 years.

 

[Alfred1963]

Your answer to me is also encouraging me because I have invested a lot into truly understanding what scriptures say. I have reasoned on it for weeks and months. I am not going to accept the biased and incorrect interpretations of our brothers and sisters. We don't get to add or detract from scripture just to make our point. The fact is this: It is God who establishes marriage and, at times, ends a marriage. It sounds like you already heard from God. So remember, he does allow divorce. The proof is in the histories of Ezra and Hosea. You might add that Abraham was also asked to divorce Hagar and send away his son Ishmael. Imagine having to do such a thing. But Abraham listened to and followed God's will, you do the same. And don't let the biased dissuade you.

God bless you.

A brother in Christ.

 

[Endeavourer]

Another great book an divorcing for abuse is Barbara Robert's "Not Under Bondage":

https://www.amazon.com/Not-Under-Bo...=2025&creative=165953&creativeASIN=0980355346

The reviews on the book are also highly informative.

 

[ajcarey]

Those who would quote 1 Corinthians 7:39 to say that divorce is never an option overlook some key things: 1) The Law of God's verdict is upheld in the New Covenant (since God never changes His moral judgments and Jesus didn't correct the Law of Moses, rather He vindicated it and defended it against the abuses of it in His time- Matthew 5:17-18, Matthew 7:12, etc) 2) The Law of God did indeed allow a narrow provision for divorce (See Deuteronomy chapter 24). 3) The Apostle wrote 1 Corinthians 7:39 to an audience who knew God's Law, who therefore knew about its narrow provision for divorce and remarriage, and who also were unlikely to ever have to be in a situation which required this narrow provision to be utilized.

Apostasy, sexual immorality, and repeated physical abuse are examples of when someone is not bound by the Law of God to remain in a marriage. And whenever there is a lawful loosing in God's eyes and the civil paperwork is finalized, then the one loosed is (obviously) not bound to the marriage anymore and is free to remarry in the Lord. Obviously there is a time to show someone patience and see if they won't change, but when they voluntarily depart or prove that is unreasonable to ever expect them to change, then it is God's will that the innocent party move on without the distraction of a wicked spouse who interferes with the purity of their home and/or their physical safety. The fact that God hates divorce does not mean the innocent party has to stay in a tumultuous and/or corrupting and/or absentee marriage until the offender dies. Such a requirement would be nonsense and God's Law is always practical and wise. The guilt of the divorce is on the offender who made the marriage impractical and unwise- not on the innocent party whose influence would have made the marriage pure and peaceful if only the other had been reasonable and considerate of the other.

This is important to understand and lay hold of even if you are not married or if you are in a faithful, peaceful marriage because: 1) It is important to understand that the Old Testament's moral judgments are also Christian moral judgments (see especially 2 Timothy 3:15-17) since God is unchanging. Jesus and the Apostles never spoke contrary to God's Law (Isaiah 8:20). 2) To follow Jesus and His Apostles faithfully we must not be out of line with God's law either. Workers of lawlessness go to hell (Matthew 7:21-27, Luke 13:23-27, 2 Timothy 2:19, Revelation 22:14 etc). The concept of Christianity that doesn't require us to get in line with God's Law is antinomianism- and it is a great heresy. 3) Though being a faithful Christian is difficult, God's Word is wise for real life so it doesn't leave people in ridiculous situations by design nor does it fail to offer solutions that are practical and realistic for real life dilemmas. It is crucial to represent God's wisdom faithfully if you want to glorify Him. Sin marring a marriage and making it unreasonable to continue on in is a reality which God gave a reasonable prescription for. But woe to the one who mars a marriage so as to make the one they married have to resort to this prescription; and woe to the one abuses this prescription to attempt to justify divorcing the one they married for insufficient reasons that have nothing to do with actual unchastity and/or danger on the part of their spouse (and this is what God rebukes Israel and Judah for in Malachi chapter 2 and what Jesus rebuked the Scribes and Pharisees for in the Gospels).