My testimony is a bit weird, apparently some of this stuff doesn't happen to everybody - I figure it happened to me because I'm so thick God couldn't hammer it into me any other way! Here goes:
I have quite the Christian heritage - my great-great-great-great grandfather was William Williams, the Welsh missionary to New Zealand who translated the bible into Maori and became an Anglican bishop, and some others, but heritage doesn't make you a Christian, as you know. Baptised Presbyterian (Scottish heritage) went to a Baptist church until I was 6, then moved to my current Anglican church. Very quickly, I have a freaky IQ, it's in the genius range, never mind what it is exactly, but I read King Arthur in prep and was at a year 10 level of reading, spelling and maths in grade 5. Everyone had big plans for me - but I started changing a bit when I was 9 and at 13 had my first acute psychotic episode, was diagnosed with schizophrenia an hospitalised for the first time, for 5 months (5 weeks was in a locked ward under a section 9). Backing up quickly, in year 7 an angel appeared to me in a dream. Yes, really - it was terrifying, in a white robe, no wings, just said some stuff (it's private) and that was it. I didn't know it wasn't normal, and that the "supernatural dreams" from God that I had about 3 times a year weren't either - they weren't some kind of big, prophetic deal, just God teaching me, about faith and love etc.
Back to the schiz - after a few weeks the not un-experienced doctors said I had the most severe case of schizophrenia they'd seen, including in adults, and after a few medications it turned out I was treatment resistant as well. They tried me on EVERYTHING, not just anti-psychotics, even Lithium, but I got Lithium toxicity and had to stop it. Wasn't working, anyway. 17 years of severe psychosis, and many medications. I was too sick to go to church. I accepted Jesus properly on my second psych hospital admission - the second is the worst because you can't pretend it'll just go away. Read the bible intensely, and started to grow as a Christian. 17 more years of severe psychosis, my thought disorder got so bad I couldn't read the bible at all and just listened to hymns and prayed. Couldn't talk to people, couldn't even look at another human, couldn't leave the house without help. Anyway, last year, I was 29, I was started on Latuda, and it worked. I could talk, go to places myself on public transport, even live almost independently in a granny flat we had built in Mum's backyard on a loan from my Aunt. I had no skills, no education, and on a disability pension not much money to give to God, so I said to him, "Look, I have nothing else, you can have my life, such as it is." Then it started happening - I had a dream from God where he basically said, "I've got a job for you - it will be hard, but it will be worth it - do you want to do it?" I said "Yep!", and for the next 17 nights in a row, supernatural training dreams, on evangelism, pastoral type things, facing persecution, on humility, all kinds of things. Talk about exhausting! Supernatural dreams aren't restful! People had always found it strangely easy to talk to me, now people would just talk to me about all sorts of personal stuff out and about, mainly I'd just listen and offer comfort, then I started sharing the Gospel as well. Oh, the people God sends to me! I often think "What just happened?" after someone has walked away. 2 people I invited to my church, they're both wanting to come regularly. Looks like I'm in the ministry business after all! God has given me, so far, 6 people to pray for and see regularly to talk to and, I suppose, teach, though I wouldn't say I'm highly qualified, as well as the random strangers who still approach me to talk and I don't really see again.
That's it so far. Who knows what God will do with me next?
Paidiske - I've only told Andrew about any of this because he's irritatingly trustworthy, I'd rather not have other people in Melbourne know.
Sorry, tried to make that as brief as possible but it still turned out a bit long
Mim
I have quite the Christian heritage - my great-great-great-great grandfather was William Williams, the Welsh missionary to New Zealand who translated the bible into Maori and became an Anglican bishop, and some others, but heritage doesn't make you a Christian, as you know. Baptised Presbyterian (Scottish heritage) went to a Baptist church until I was 6, then moved to my current Anglican church. Very quickly, I have a freaky IQ, it's in the genius range, never mind what it is exactly, but I read King Arthur in prep and was at a year 10 level of reading, spelling and maths in grade 5. Everyone had big plans for me - but I started changing a bit when I was 9 and at 13 had my first acute psychotic episode, was diagnosed with schizophrenia an hospitalised for the first time, for 5 months (5 weeks was in a locked ward under a section 9). Backing up quickly, in year 7 an angel appeared to me in a dream. Yes, really - it was terrifying, in a white robe, no wings, just said some stuff (it's private) and that was it. I didn't know it wasn't normal, and that the "supernatural dreams" from God that I had about 3 times a year weren't either - they weren't some kind of big, prophetic deal, just God teaching me, about faith and love etc.
Back to the schiz - after a few weeks the not un-experienced doctors said I had the most severe case of schizophrenia they'd seen, including in adults, and after a few medications it turned out I was treatment resistant as well. They tried me on EVERYTHING, not just anti-psychotics, even Lithium, but I got Lithium toxicity and had to stop it. Wasn't working, anyway. 17 years of severe psychosis, and many medications. I was too sick to go to church. I accepted Jesus properly on my second psych hospital admission - the second is the worst because you can't pretend it'll just go away. Read the bible intensely, and started to grow as a Christian. 17 more years of severe psychosis, my thought disorder got so bad I couldn't read the bible at all and just listened to hymns and prayed. Couldn't talk to people, couldn't even look at another human, couldn't leave the house without help. Anyway, last year, I was 29, I was started on Latuda, and it worked. I could talk, go to places myself on public transport, even live almost independently in a granny flat we had built in Mum's backyard on a loan from my Aunt. I had no skills, no education, and on a disability pension not much money to give to God, so I said to him, "Look, I have nothing else, you can have my life, such as it is." Then it started happening - I had a dream from God where he basically said, "I've got a job for you - it will be hard, but it will be worth it - do you want to do it?" I said "Yep!", and for the next 17 nights in a row, supernatural training dreams, on evangelism, pastoral type things, facing persecution, on humility, all kinds of things. Talk about exhausting! Supernatural dreams aren't restful! People had always found it strangely easy to talk to me, now people would just talk to me about all sorts of personal stuff out and about, mainly I'd just listen and offer comfort, then I started sharing the Gospel as well. Oh, the people God sends to me! I often think "What just happened?" after someone has walked away. 2 people I invited to my church, they're both wanting to come regularly. Looks like I'm in the ministry business after all! God has given me, so far, 6 people to pray for and see regularly to talk to and, I suppose, teach, though I wouldn't say I'm highly qualified, as well as the random strangers who still approach me to talk and I don't really see again.
That's it so far. Who knows what God will do with me next?
Paidiske - I've only told Andrew about any of this because he's irritatingly trustworthy, I'd rather not have other people in Melbourne know.
Sorry, tried to make that as brief as possible but it still turned out a bit long
Mim
