Would you marry a Muslim wanting to convert to Christianity?

[Idl1993]

What if this person you've been dating for four years and are willing to convert before they got engaged? She's gone to church for years on occassion but celebrates muslim holidays and still hasn't told her family shes converted not until after she gets married so shes not an openly christian still. What would you do in this case?

 

[Winken]

I'd think carefully about the potential for repercussions from her family.

 

[thecolorsblend]

What if this person you've been dating for four years and are willing to convert before they got engaged? She's gone to church for years on occassion but celebrates muslim holidays and still hasn't told her family shes converted not until after she gets married so shes not an openly christian still. What would you do in this case?

I would never date outside my faith to begin with. The only reason I'm even dating a Protestant is because she and I were together before I converted. But I certainly wouldn't date a Muslim, even if she was supposedly interested in converting. Get back to me after the conversion is complete... maybe.

 

[Idl1993]

I'd think carefully about the potential for repercussions from her family.

Yeah thats kind of what I'm worried about and in a sense feel like maybe its best they dont know she converted. But its not just her parents that have had an issue my parents dont approve of me being in a relationship with a Muslim woman. And I dont know how I feel about marrying a Muslim woman as far as family and spiritually.

 

[Winken]

Yeah thats kind of what I'm worried about and in a sense feel like maybe its best they dont know she converted. But its not just her parents that have had an issue my parents dont approve of me being in a relationship with a Muslim woman. And I dont know how I feel about marrying a Muslim woman as far as family and spiritually.

Apply the brakes until you have a more thorough understanding of the situation.

 

[Idl1993]

I would never date outside my faith to begin with. The only reason I'm even dating a Protestant is because she and I were together before I converted. But I certainly wouldn't date a Muslim, even if she was supposedly interested in converting. Get back to me after the conversion is complete... maybe.

Like I said she's converted but not openly to her family. We've been together for 4 years and she was Muslim up until recently I am not that religious to begin with and I didnt really think about marriage when I first met her. She never pressed me to convert to Islam plus I never knew much about Islam in itself. She was interested in Christianity at the beginning of our relationship. But she still practiced islam. It didnt really interfere with our relationship it never has.

 

[Godlovesmetwo]

Pragmatically speaking no but the heart is an unpredictable organ!

 

[Kiterius]

What if this person you've been dating for four years and are willing to convert before they got engaged? She's gone to church for years on occassion but celebrates muslim holidays and still hasn't told her family she's converted not until after she gets married so she's not openly christian still. What would you do in this case?

I would not marry her.

 

[Paidiske]

I would be willing to explore it.

I would want very careful and thorough preparation for her baptism, though, as well as marriage preparation; preferably done in tandem by the same minister.

 

[Deidre32]

Why not wait until she converts, before marrying her? It might be easier.

 

[Tinker Grey]

Of course not.

 

[Idl1993]

I would be willing to explore it.

I would want very careful and thorough preparation for her baptism, though, as well as marriage preparation; preferably done in tandem by the same minister.

I already said she has already converted so shes been baptized. We have not gotten married but shes not openly christian and still celebrates Muslim holidays. Especially when we have a family is it really a big deal if she continues to celebrate those holidays?

 

[Paidiske]

Sorry, I thought when you said that she hadn't been open, that that meant she hadn't been baptised.

I think one of the things you would need to work through in marriage preparation would be questions of things that are important to both of your families of origin. If, for example, a big family meal at Eid al-Fitr is part of what her family does, asking her not to do that might be akin to asking someone not to go home for Thanksgiving or Christmas, in terms of the emotions involved. Is that fair and reasonable, and something she is willing to do? Or does she feel that being part of her family means celebrating with them even though she doesn't share the reason for the celebration any more?

Those sorts of things would need to be carefully explored, and both of you would need to be comfortable with where the other was at, for me to think the marriage would be a good idea.

 

[Idl1993]

Why not wait until she converts, before marrying her? It might be easier.

She's already converted but hasn't openly said she's a christian convert. So her family doesnt know she converted yet. She doesnt want to tell them until we're married.

 

[Idl1993]

Sorry, I thought when you said that she hadn't been open, that that meant she hadn't been baptised.

I think one of the things you would need to work through in marriage preparation would be questions of things that are important to both of your families of origin. If, for example, a big family meal at Eid al-Fitr is part of what her family does, asking her not to do that might be akin to asking someone not to go home for Thanksgiving or Christmas, in terms of the emotions involved. Is that fair and reasonable, and something she is willing to do? Or does she feel that being part of her family means celebrating with them even though she doesn't share the reason for the celebration any more?

Those sorts of things would need to be carefully explored, and both of you would need to be comfortable with where the other was at, for me to think the marriage would be a good idea.

No shes been baptized a month and a half ago and has gone to church etc but hasn't openly told her family of her conversion to Christianity. Which is why I was saying she is not fully open about this. The only ones who know are me the church her of course and I told my parents but they aren't supposed to have known. She's not fully openly about all of this until after we get married. In part I think maybe its best her family doesnt know but in part shes not converted completely since shes not open about her new christian affiliation. She still says she is Muslim to her family and doesnt plan to be open about it until after we're married. I dont even know though how her family is going to take that she is a convert.

Yeah she has a very close and good relationship with her family. I'm pretty sure she doesn't want to not celebrate those traditional holidays. Idk what that influence would have on our kids though if we have them but I guess its not that big of a deal. More her secretiveness of her conversion is something I'm a bit concerned about. But I understand it may be the best choice for her.

 

[Dave-W]

I never dated. Period. (other than 3 or 4 one-off social occasions)

But if I did date someone more than one time, it would only be after they came to faith.

But to add to your conundrum, I am Messianic which means I (and my family) live in a Jewish lifestyle. (that would be a REAL problem for most muslims)

 

[Sammy-San]

I never dated. Period. (other than 3 or 4 one-off social occasions)

But if I did date someone more than one time, it would only be after they came to faith.

But to add to your conundrum, I am Messianic which means I (and my family) live in a Jewish lifestyle. (that would be a REAL problem for most muslims)

Do you consider yourself Christian?

 

[Dave-W]

in part shes not converted completely since shes not open about her new christian affiliation.

I know Jews who are in the same situation. But Jews will just disown you and count you as dead; whereas devout muslims may come to kill the "infidels." (depending on cultural/national background)

 

[Idl1993]

I never dated. Period. (other than 3 or 4 one-off social occasions)

But if I did date someone more than one time, it would only be after they came to faith.

But to add to your conundrum, I am Messianic which means I (and my family) live in a Jewish lifestyle. (that would be a REAL problem for most muslims)

I actually always was told Islam is similar to Judaism they both dont believe in the father the son and the holy ghost. My fiances sister is actually also married to a jew. And shes Muslim. I think it would be for me the same problem if she came from a Jewish family or a Muslim family.

 

[Dave-W]

Do you consider yourself Christian?

Yes or no, depending on your definition of "christian."

If it is defined as a follower of Jesus - then yes.
But if it is defined as the Gentile version of the Messianic New Covenant faith - then no.

Most people use the former, but I use the latter.