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Worship under a different leader

Discussion in 'Worship Ministry' started by Jenster, Aug 20, 2005.

  1. Jenster

    Jenster Guest

    +0
    I'm looking for some honesty here, folks. Has anyone besides me ever had difficulties adjusting to a different worship leader? Not even as a member of the team, but even as part of the congregation?

    If so, how to adjust? :confused:

    I feel bad that critical thoughts pop into my head during service. I try to focus on God, but then the leader and the other vocalists will clash (singing two different melodies), or he'll pray but not sound exactly prepared so he'll ramble on and on. Put plainly, I have a rebellious spirit that doesn't want to follow this leader. :sigh: He talks about doing things "as the Spirit moves" but sometimes I think that's his excuse for not caring to prepare.

    Maybe I'm just confessing or venting here, but if anyone has wise words to share, please do. Thanks.
     
  2. icklemissmerry

    icklemissmerry New Member

    62
    +2
    Christian
    Private
    I've had the same but with youth leaders. Our church saw two of the best youth leaders i've met leave two years ago after their contract ended. I couldn't get on with the new one. I had the same as you, critical thoughts, 'even I could do that better', 'what are they thinking?', and i think alot of it was me just comparing to the other two, having been quite close to the former workers.

    I still haven't completely got through it yet, but i guess you have to think to yourself, they're doing God's work, they are trying, they are mereley under construction. Someone told me that when you walk into church, if you see someone you have problems with, pray for them. Then maybe their circumstance will become more apparent to you. The person who told me this, then said she found out lots about hardships they'd been through, she began to talk to some of them more and realise just what they were ACTUALLY like.

    Maybe it's one of those situations, whenever critisicm comes into your head, try praying for them, and thanking God for them whatever they are like, and ask God to continue growing in them. Everyone has to start somewhere, and as hard as it is being in the congregation where we like a neatly flowing service, coming from experience, it's hard to stand up in church and lead completely confidently, especially if they are new. Try not to let it stand in the way of you and your time with God.

    Abbie
    'I can do everything in Him who gives me strength' - Philippians 4:13
     
  3. Jenster

    Jenster Guest

    +0
    Abbie, thanks for sharing about your experience with the youth leaders! Praying for leaders and thanking the LORD for them does sound like the Godly thing to do. I'll give it a try. :)

    Funny, yesterday the LORD also brought me some perspective on this through a seminar I attended. Basically, the speaker said that we need all different opinions in life - that no one has the one and only answer on things. He was talking about how men and women think about things with different ideas in mind, but both viewpoints are necessary and complementary. Maybe it's the same for worship, or leadership. I think one thing is the "better" way, but others will disagree.

    Also, I was talking with a woman from my church and she was saying how great she thinks one of our pastors is. She talked about how approachable he is, etc. That was an eye-opener for me, because I don't feel the same way. It just goes to show that God uses different leaders to reach different people. I have to respect that, you know?

    Thanks again! :)
     
  4. icklemissmerry

    icklemissmerry New Member

    62
    +2
    Christian
    Private
    its very true! :)

    It is scary how different two opinions can be, but both are definately needed! It's one of the issues im having to face organising this worship evening we're having. I had in mind a quiet meditation, then my best mate was saying he doesn't enjoy these times and finds all out loud worship most effective. Complete difference in perspective.

    It is so hard to see things from both sides though, everyone instincively has the 'i know best' gene in them somewhere I think! :)

    But glad to be of any help :)

    Abbie
    'I can do everything in Him who gives me strength' - Philippians 4:13
     
  5. A Brother In Christ

    A Brother In Christ Senior Veteran

    +50
    Christian
    Married
    :sorry:
    1 cor 14:33 For God is not an author of confusion, but of peace, as in all churches of the saints

    till one has the heart to love your brethren you wait have to wait to share this verses so that you make sure your heart is right before correcting ..because without love this verses will just cause more division

    colossians 3:13 Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any : even as Christ forgave you, so also do you.
     
  6. He is Yahweh

    He is Yahweh Well-Known Member

    +46
    Christian
    Single
    Just to throw a few things out there, some probably not relevant, others hopefully!

    1) Ultimately there is only one worship leader, and that is the holy spirit. (we "worship by the Spirit of God" Philippians 3:3)

    2) Everyone's worship is different, I went to an event called soul survivor a couple of weeks ago and during the main meetings there were 9000 people in a tent worshipping God, some were jumping up and down, some were waving there arms everywhere, some were dancing, some we pretty still, some were kneeling down etc. None of them were worshipping the lord any 'better' than the others.

    3) I think it is perfectly reasonable to do things "as the Spirit moves" although you are also right that it could just be an excuse not to prepare, obviously I cannot tell you whether it is! I was reading Matt Redman's "The Unquenchable Worshipper" a few days ago and he said this:

     
  7. Jenster

    Jenster Guest

    +0
    Thank you, He Is Yahweh, what a great excerpt! I love hearing how the Holy Spirit moves and touches those who follow Him and those who are still seeking Him. :amen: God uses all things for His good!

    I agree, there are many different styles of worship. It is not my place to evaluate it as though I know the "right" way (no such thing!). I can honestly say, though, that I do not enter into the spirit under this other worship leader, and that's frustrating. As a musically inclined person, I would think that worship in song would be the easiest way for me to connect with the LORD.

    I did speak with this person, not directly about my thoughts, but just about worship in general. He did say he plays things on the fly. So I suppose my responsibility is to pray that he will care more about the worship such that he will prepare, in addition to responding "as the Spirit moves."

    Just as a random thought ... I wish I didn't feel burdened by this... :sigh:

    O LORD, thank You that You are the One True worship leader, and that You give us the gift of worship to glorify You and honor You. What a privilege it is to join together in corporate worship of You, and to be allowed to overflow with Your praise and witness. We MAGNIFY You! We WORSHIP You, Maker of the heavens! You are worthy of all our praise! :clap: Let me not descend into critical thoughts, but be lifted up with my brother and sisters in giving You all praise, honor and glory forever and ever! In Jesus' name, AMEN!
     
  8. A Brother In Christ

    A Brother In Christ Senior Veteran

    +50
    Christian
    Married
    maybe ...but we have a differnet worship than OT believers

    why because God tells us in john 4:23-24 worship in spirit and truth...

    define spirit worship in NT from soulish worship of the OT

    great study
     
  9. SGM4HIM

    SGM4HIM Regular Member

    +137
    Non-Denom
     
  10. McDLT

    McDLT Well-Known Member

    +46
    Christian
    Married
    CA-Conservatives
    Different styles are great, but, yes, I agree that it takes a while to warm up to a new worship leader. Most of it comes down to typical relationship issues. I had problems with one worship leader but then decided to stop comparing and to find at least one good thing about their style. It worked; it took time, but it did eventually work.
     
  11. Jenster

    Jenster Guest

    +0
    All helpful thoughts, Brother in Christ, SGM4HIM and McDLT! Thank you for sharing and letting me know I'm not alone. (Lol to SMG4HIM about the t-shirt. heh. :D ) I think one thing I'm realizing is that there are many different ways to give feedback - sometimes it's not even to the worship leader but to a member of the team. Not that I would go *around* the leader, but sometimes people within the team have more influence than we think, or show some particular aptitude for music and can bring an idea forward to help the team along.

    I'll try to find things to praise him for as well, and see where that goes. As one of my bosses once said, you can attract more people with honey than vinegar. :)
     
  12. martinedwards

    martinedwards Member

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    Anglican
    Married
    All worship leaders are different. IMHO people connect with God in worship better if they are familiar with the music and the style of the leader.

    weekend conferences never seem to really take off until Sat night as it takes fri & sat am to get used to the new style.

    I can worship regardless of who is leading, but I can "let go" far sooner if I'm familiar with the leader.

    Variations in timing & tune which are so common as a load of leaders (me included) dont read the notes, just go from memory from the CD, REALLY mess with my head when I'm in the congregation.

    Everyone does things differently.

    don't think "he's doing it wrong"

    Think "isn't the variety of God's creation great!!!"
     
  13. Dark Matter

    Dark Matter Well-Known Member

    757
    +29
    Christian
    Jenster, we all have had this type experience. It is normal. There are a few things at play.
    1. He sounds unprepared and of questionable talent or preparation. This is something that is very distracting, not just to you, but to all.
    2. Just because he is the leader, it does not translate that you must follow.
    3. It is a good spiritual exercise for your to seek God and worship in the midst of this person's leadership. Your goal is not to follow him, but to worship God. His role is to assist you in that task by leading music.

    I would encourage you to speak with the worship leader, very gently, about your thoughts or feelings. Explain to him that things he does when leading (singing different melodies, rambling prayers) have caused you to be more distracted than led into God's presence. Make the focus on what he is doing, and not on him personally. This gives him room to grow and change. Just consider, if you were doing something that distracted the congregation during worship, and you could change it, wouldn't you want to know? Offer him that same courtesy. Consider how you would want to be told, and approach him the same way.

    It is okay to vent here, but be careful not to vent at your church before you speak to him.

    Speak to you pastor. He wants to know your feelings.

    All the best to you,
    Dark Matter
     
  14. ALABALE

    ALABALE Praise Him!

    +249
    Pentecostal
    Married
    Change is always difficult. Many here have given great advice and words of encouragement. I pray that you find a way to be able to accept this person's leadership and you can all Worship our Lord in unity.

    Hang in there!:thumbsup:
     
  15. Jenster

    Jenster Guest

    +0
    Thanks you guys. I am hanging in there. And I do feel this is a spiritual exercise - a challenging one for me in particular. I am trying to be flexible, although my critical mind was in rare form this past Sunday. :( I'm as guilty of being judgmental as the rest, and I know this, so I am trying not to be a hindrance to the worship. If I can get to that place of being able to talk gently with the worship leader, I will. the LORD is still working on me!

    I'm starting to wonder if this leader doesn't have any role models - nothing he's aspiring to, so he's just doing "whatever." It's helpful to constantly seek to improve oneself and get feedback.
     
  16. ALABALE

    ALABALE Praise Him!

    +249
    Pentecostal
    Married
    Jenster, It's good to know that you are aware of how your feel and that you are trying not to be a hindrance. I commend you for that!

    Have you mentioned how you feel to the Senior Pastors?
     
  17. Jenster

    Jenster Guest

    +0
    Thanks, ALABALE. Um, no I haven't talked with the pastor. I'll pray about that. Part of me feels that, well, if I'm not willing to step up, I should be very hesistant to criticize someone else. But if the LORD would have me speak up, then I'll pray for the cue. :crossrc:
     
  18. ALABALE

    ALABALE Praise Him!

    +249
    Pentecostal
    Married
    Good. We wouldn't want you to jump the gun.
    When/If you approach the Pastors try not to make it seem as a criticism. Use words like: You want to be obedient, you want to serve, etc. This is key!;)
     
  19. Jenster

    Jenster Guest

    +0
    Thanks, brother. "Obedient." "Serve." Got it. ;)

    I have to confess, I DO speak up when I feel it's important and when I feel I can do so tactfully. Here's something funny though. A ministry leader called me up this week because we're having a meeting on Sunday. I had voiced some concerns about a new ministry policy to someone a few weeks ago (basically, disagreed with it), and that someone turned to the ministry leader and told him.

    So the phone call was him trying to "head me off at the pass," which I find funny. I had no intentions whatsoever about bringing up the issue at the meeting, and I'm in no way a political person. I mean, I'm glad he called me and we could clear the air, but it's not like I was going to stage a protest or something. ha! Human behavior is funny.
     
  20. ALABALE

    ALABALE Praise Him!

    +249
    Pentecostal
    Married
    Hmmm...seems to me that your way of being has gotten you in trouble in the past! (haha - Just kidding)

    Yes, human behavior is funny!
     
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