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Featured Worried and concerned

Discussion in 'Requests for Christian Advice' started by Emily7584, Mar 10, 2021.

  1. Emily7584

    Emily7584 New Member

    United Kingdom
    My relationship with Jesus isn’t the best.
    I’m worried because I don’t really feel emotions for Jesus.

    I’ve been Christian since start of may 2020.
    I don’t have a close relationship with Him. [Jesus].
    I feel scared because I’m not close to Him.

    He scares me and I’m scared because He judges and that He tells people to leave.
    [Matthew 7:23 Then I will tell them plainly, 'I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!']

    I’m scared because incase what if I don’t love Him.
    I’m scared incase I don’t love Him.

    Sometimes I feel rushed in time and pressured.

    Matthew 15:8
    "'These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.

    I’m scared incase it’s a heart problem.

    Sometimes I don’t feel like a desire to pray and a desire...

    is a relationship with God the Father and a relationship with Jesus, one relationship or two relationships.

    ever since I became Christian, I focused mostly on God the Father and feel emotions for Him. And thought about Him mostly. I feel like I think about Him all the time and not Jesus as much. I don’t really feel emotions [for Jesus] and it stresses me out because I don’t feel a desire.

    thanks for reading [​IMG]
    We teamed up with Faith Counseling. Can they help you today?
  2. Maria Billingsley

    Maria Billingsley Well-Known Member Supporter

    United States
    In Relationship
    Welcome. Your relationship with the Father is through His Son Jesus Christ of Nazareth. They are one in the same. There is no fear in love and our Lord is Love. Emotions are not key here, obedience is key. Walk in His Holy Spirit daily so that the adversary departs from you. In this way you will know the truth and comfort of His love for you. Be blessed.
  3. CMDRExorcist

    CMDRExorcist Theology Explorer Supporter

    United States
    Sounds to me like you should show yourself some grace and mercy. IMHO, your longing shows that you're on the right path. God the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit are one and the same. Take a deep breath, relax, and don't put so much pressure on yourself because it will burn you out. Read, listen, and pray, but remember that you're saved by HIS grace, not by your own love or actions.

    Above all, I would encourage you to continue to be honest with yourself. Having the insight and courage to say that you're struggling is huge. It shows that you're mature enough to recognize that you have personal challenges to overcome.

    May God Bless You!
  4. Friedrich Rubinstein

    Friedrich Rubinstein Well-Known Member

    Hi :)

    I used to feel the same. I couldn't get myself to develop feelings for a person I can't even see. Sure, I was grateful for what Jesus has done for me and that he protects me every single day, but it just wasn't the same as the affection you feel towards someone who's visibly a part of your life.
    So I asked Jesus how he can expect me to love him, or if maybe he wants to create feelings for him in me. But no, his answer was very different. Jesus does not expect us to force feelings. The love towards Jesus is not an emotion, it is a willful decision. The decision to put him above everyone and everything else.
    Loving Jesus means to say "Your will be done, not mine!"

    Jesus and the Father are one and the same God, so there is only 1 relationship. When we talk to Jesus the Father "listens" as well and vice versa. When I pray I sometimes say "Lord Jesus", sometimes "dear Father", it doesn't really matter.
    Perhaps it would help you to understand who Jesus actually is. Jesus is not a being separate from God. Jesus is God, visible in human form. God the Father became a human being who bears the name Jesus of Nazareth.
    You probably know that we humans are a spirit inside a fleshly body. So, while we are a "human" spirit Jesus was a body containing God's spirit. Hence he was fully God and fully human at the same time.
  5. Lawrence87

    Lawrence87 Member

    United Kingdom
    Eastern Orthodox
    You don't necessarily have to feel anything. Just by being a Christian and going to Church, reading the Bible and all that stuff you are expressing love for Christ. We could all do better and love Christ more, but you're on the right track. It's not necessarily about having a tingly feeling or something like that. Pray that your heart be opened to Christ more and more, and read about those who have set an example of loving Christ. And don't worry too much about feelings and emotions...
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  6. Leaf473

    Leaf473 Well-Known Member

    United States
    Many Christians and churches today emphasize feelings.

    It sounds like you believe in God.
    Do you believe that Jesus was at one time dead and that God made him alive again? If so you're just fine, imo.

    The church you go to now, does it talk a lot about feelings and emotions?
    If so you might think about checking out other groups in your area.
    Or, these days there's loads of Christian groups you can meet with online,
    There's a pretty big variety of available :)
  7. Dave G.

    Dave G. Well-Known Member

    United States
    Sounds like you need some foundational truths through scripture. Do you have a bible based church with a foundations based bible study by chance ? People hang themselves by cherry picking certain verses before coming to a reasonable level of scriptural knowledge. Less than a year in is really still very early on. Don't hang yourself when really you haven't yet learned enough. The relationship will come but meanwhile loving God is not the kind of love we can fully understand in human terms ( humanistic type love is different). Rest in the thought that He finishes a good work started in us. Note what that says, He does it, we just respond.. Make yourself available.
  8. Kenny'sID

    Kenny'sID Well-Known Member Supporter

    Are you an evil doer, no? Then dont worry about it. As long as you are doing as Christ tells you to do, or not to do, you are doing fine.

    Those feelings you have, or the lack thereof, are feelings you are expecting, but are not necessarily supposed to be as intense as you my be expecting. There is no scripture telling us how much we should feel.

    Also, it's like an old married couple, the elation you felt at first will level out, and not be as intense as it used to be, something that is absolutely normal.

    See, if you started doing evil, then you would feel the disconnect between Christ and yourself, and then you would see/feel that you were connected, and had the feelings all along.

    As they say, "You dont know what you've got till its gone."

    But you really dont want to get rid of it, in order to find it, just have faith, do as you should, and Christ will keep his word and save you.
    Last edited: Mar 11, 2021
  9. longwait

    longwait Well-Known Member

    God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit are one. So I guess you don't have to worry too much about that. But remember Jesus is the way to the Father.
  10. tturt

    tturt Senior Veteran Supporter

    Emily, welcome to CF. Encourage you to do a study of God's many names, titles, and attributions. There's hundreds Would use a site that gives the Scripture to support what they're referencing. Here's a few:
    1. "Jehovah Nissi (The Lord My Banner)
    2. Jehovah Raah (The Lord My Shepherd)
    3. Jehovah Rapha (The Lord That Heals)
    4. Jehovah Tsidkenu (The Lord Our Righteousness)
    5. Jehovah Mekoddishkem (The Lord Who Sanctifies You)
    6. EJehovah Jireh (The Lord Will Provide)
    7. Jehovah Shalom (The Lord Is Peace)
    8. (source: instaencouragements.com)
  11. Brenda Blakely

    Brenda Blakely New Member

    United States
    You have made the best decision of your life-to accept the saving grace of Jesus and let him help you to live as you were created and in the fullness of all that He has prepared for you. You are His child, given to Him by the Father, God. He cares for you, loves you, will not leave you and will be with you always. What wonderful promises He has made so that we don’t have to live in doubt or struggle. Just keep your eyes on Him and let Him help you. He knows your every weakness, he knows your strength and His grace is sufficient for all your needs. I know Jesus must be so glad to that you want to please Him, follow Him and serve Him. He is watching and the angels in heaven are celebrating that you are trying to walk in His ways.

    It takes time to grow. Read the work of God, worship Him, fellowship with other believers, who live in the Truth of His word. The scripture that you quoted were addressed to the Pharisees. These men were pretending to live for Jesus and were really living for themselves. You have to study the whole word of God and not take isolated verses and use them. The more you study and allow the Holy Spirit to guide and teach you the stronger you will become and the better relationship you will have with the Father, God, the Holy Spirit and Jesus the son of God. They will renew your mind and help you to focus on them. They will help you to walk in the Way of Truth. You sound like a wonderful, committed Christian who is seeking to please God and that is exactly what He wants from you.

    Here is a number-855 382 5433-you can call for resources to help you in this wonderful walk with Jesus. For me God, the Father, was always the important member of the Trinity because my earthly Father had failed me and I longed for a Father. But the Holy Spirit is always with me and ready to help when I need Him and Jesus paid the price for my sins so I know He loves me. I am praying for you to find the fullness of all that God has planned for you. God bless you. Just keep living in the desire to please Him. You can not fail. He will uphold you.
  12. splish- splash

    splish- splash Stepping out of my comfort zone. Supporter

    United Kingdom
    Its very normal to feel that way, so don't even worry or try to hide how you feel, from Him. However, a relationship only blossoms between 2 people, when they are spending a lot of time, in each ofher's company. This is how they also grow to understand each other, on a deeper level and not forgetting, to mention becoming attached. So spend time with Christ a lot more, read His word on a daily basis and tell Him all your fears, doubts and struggles, then see how that goes.
  13. Daniel Marsh

    Daniel Marsh Well-Known Member

    United States
    Study II Peter 1 and apply it.
  14. Emily7584

    Emily7584 New Member

    United Kingdom
    Thanks :)
  15. SusaninBC

    SusaninBC New Member

    Emotions lie. A lot. Focusing solely on how you feel at any given time will lead to anxiety and a sense of failure. The Christian walk is not a steady uphill journey... there are some pretty deep valleys, and sometimes it seems like our whole life is one deep valley. David wrote about that very thing in the Psalms. There are also times of incredible joy, gratefulness, and praise, but they are often more the exception than the rule.

    Salvation isn't about feelings, and it's also not about just believing that Jesus is the Son of God who died for our sins and rose again. The book of James tells us that Satan's demons believe in God, and that knowledge horrifies them because they know they don't possess salvation. Believing is not enough.

    Salvation comes by repentance, by turning from your sin and turning toward Christ. It comes by putting away the old you with all your naturally sinful desires, attitudes, and actions and walking closely with Jesus every day, reading His Word, speaking with Him, listening to what He says through Scripture, literally marinating in Him. Salvation is immediate when you first take that step of repentance, and it is also progressive, in that you grow more and more like Him the more time you spend with Him.

    This is why the "Sinner's Prayer" is a dangerous thing... it lulls people into a false sense of security because they're told if they will just say these words and truly believe Jesus died for their sins, they're saved. But without repentance, there is no salvation. Many, many people have prayed the Sinner's Prayer at church, summer camp, or a revival meeting and then gone on to live the exact same way they were before, because they are still spiritually dead in their sins.

    And when you walk away from Him... because you will, at times, walk away from Him... your desire to be back in fellowship with Him always draws you back.

    You will not always feel the same excitement you did when you first began walking with Him. It will come at times, and sometimes even in the middle of the darkest times you will feel great joy from His nearness (because the Bible says He is near to the brokenhearted), but much of the Christian walk will be a lot less euphoric.

    This is a tool Satan uses to convince us that we must not truly be saved. Satan is the father of lies... and feelings lie. Never focus on feelings... focus on the truth of God's Word, and His promise to never let us go. If you truly repented of your sin and followed Christ, your feelings will fluctuate but your salvation is secure for all eternity.
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  16. Sketcher

    Sketcher Born Imperishable

    OK, but did he die and rise again, or not?

    OK, but did he reach out to Peter at the end of the book of John after Peter denied him, or not?

    OK, but did he express mercy for the tax collector in Luke 18:13-14, or not?

    OK, but what does Jesus say about what kind of Lord he is in Matthew 11:28-30?

    OK, but did Jesus know about that in every person he died for before he did it, or not?

    OK, but he still invites you to.

    One. John 14 is a good starting point for that.

    You sound like you just need to learn and grow and worship and relax.

    SANTOSO Well-Known Member

    Dear one,
    It is all right to be concerned about Matthew 7:23 but don’t worry or don’t be scared.

    Let us understand what the Lord is concerned about when He said that in Matthew 7:23. Let us understand from what the Lord have spoken in Matthew 7:21-23 :

    "Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. -Matthew 7:21

    On that day many will say to me, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?' -Matthew 7:22

    And then will I declare to them, 'I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.' -Matthew 7:23

    So dear one, what concerns our Lord is the one who does the will of the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ who is in heaven.

    This is what the Lord Jesus Christ in His own words have said :

    For this is the will of my Father, that everyone who looks on the Son and believes in Him should have eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day." -John 6:40

    The Lord have said those who say to Him, 'Lord, Lord,' —that they haven’t looked on the Son and believes in Him —, even though
    they prophesy in His name, and cast out demons in His name, and do many mighty works in His name.

    If they have looked on the Son and believes in Him, they have done the will of the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ in Heaven.

    Why ? you may say that those people whom the Lord said that they haven’t looked on the Son and believe in Him ?

    What does it means to look on the Son ?

    This is what we have heard the Lord Himself have said :

    And he answered them, "To you it has been given to know the secrets of the kingdom of heaven, but to them it has not been given. -Matthew 13:11

    For to the one who has, more will be given, and he will have an abundance, but from the one who has not, even what he has will be taken away. -Matthew 13:12

    This is why I speak to them in parables, because seeing they do not see, and hearing they do not hear, nor do they understand. -Matthew 13:13

    Indeed, in their case the prophecy of Isaiah is fulfilled that says: "'"You will indeed hear but never understand, and you will indeed see but never perceive." -Matthew 13:14

    Don’t we LOOK to see ? Yes.

    Why the Lord speaks in parables ? The Lord Himself said,’because seeing they do not see.’

    Then who can see ? Lord Himself have said to those has been given to know the secrets of the kingdom of heaven; they see !

    What those has been given to know the secrets of the kingdom of heaven CAN SEE ?
    The Lord Himself have said : For to the one who has, more will be given, and he will have an abundance,

    So what those has been given to know the secrets of the kingdom of heaven HAS ?

    This is what we have heard the Lord Himself have said :

    Indeed, in their case the prophecy of Isaiah is fulfilled that says: "'"You will indeed hear but never understand, and you will indeed see but never perceive." -Matthew 13:14

    So those who has been given to know the secrets of the kingdom of heaven SEE, for they PERCEIVE !

    What those who has been given to know the secrets of the kingdom of heaven PERCEIVE from the Lord, and HAVE !

    Those who has been given to know the secrets of the kingdom of heaven HAVE PERCEIVE WHAT THE LORD HAVE SAID !

    So those who looked on the Son is those who have perceived what the Lord have said !

    Yes, the Lord have said that the will of His Father is everyone who believes in Him, as we have heard :

    For this is the will of my Father, that everyone who looks on the Son and believes in Him should have eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day." -John 6:40

    What does it mean to believe in the Lord Jesus Christ?
    This is what we have heard :
    Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life
    ; whoever does not obey the Son shall not see life, but the wrath of God remains on him. -John 3:36

    Don’t we see the parentheses?
    For we have heard the Lord have said :

    For truly, I say to you, until heaven and earth pass away, not an iota, not a dot, will pass from the Law until all is accomplished. -Matthew 5:18

    So those who believe in the Son, are those obey the Son !

    What are we called to obey ? We are called to obey what the Lord have taught !

    This is what we have heard:
    assuming that you have heard about Him ( Jesus ) and were TAUGHT in Him ( Jesus ) , as the truth is in Jesus, -Ephesians 4:21

    So those who believe in the Lord Jesus Christ or the Son is those who obey the Son are taught in Him.

    Therefore, the will of the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ is that everyone perceive what the Son has said and those who believe in Him are those who obey the Son and are taught in Him.

    As we have heard :
    For this is the will of my Father, that everyone who looks on the Son and believes in Him should have eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day." -John 6:40

    So dear one, you can be concerned what you hear and don’t understand but don’t worry and don’t be scared. Just do what the Lord have told you, that is, do the will of the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ who is in Heaven.

    SANTOSO Well-Known Member

    Dear one,
    I understand your longing to have relationship with Jesus. Don’t worry. Don’t be scared.

    Have you been baptized ?

    This is what we have heard:
    We were buried therefore with Him ( Jesus ) by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life. -Romans 6:4

    Likewise, we have heard :
    Jesus said to him, "I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. -John 14:6

    Having obeyed the Lord to be baptized. Apostle Paul have told us that we might walk in the newness of life or we might walk in the Lord Jesus Christ.

    How do we walk in the Lord ?
    This is what we have heard the Lord Himself have said:

    teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age." -Matthew 28:20

    How do the Lord Jesus Christ is with us always, to the end of the age ?

    Isn’t the Lord Jesus Christ at the right hand of the Father in heaven ? How the Lord can be with us ?

    The Lord Jesus Christ Himself have said :
    I have come into the world as light, so that whoever believes in Me may not remain in darkness. -John 12:46

    How this explain the Lord is with us ?
    This is what we have heard:

    For God, who said, "Let light shine out of darkness," has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ. -2 Corinthians 4:6

    Isn’t the light ? The true light is Jesus !

    Jesus, our Lord have said :
    Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”- John 8:13

    Yes, how does light shine in our hearts?

    This is what we have heard :
    For the commandment is a lamp and the teaching a light, and the reproofs of discipline are the way of life, -Proverbs 6:23

    So when we believe in Jesus and obey what He has taught us, we receive His teachings in our hearts — the true light has shone in our hearts to give light to the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ!

    When the Lord Jesus Christ’s teachings in our hearts, let us be reminded by what the Lord Himself have spoken:

    "These things I have spoken to you while I am still with you. -John 14:25
    But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He ( Holy Spirit) will TEACH you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you. -John 14:26

    That is why apostle Paul prayed this prayer :

    For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, -Ephesians 3:14
    from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named, -Ephesians 3:15
    that according to the riches of his glory He ( God the Father ) may grant you to be strengthened with power through His Spirit ( the Holy Spirit) in your inner being ( in your heart) , -Ephesians 3:16
    so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith'that you, being rooted and grounded in love, -Ephesians 3:17

    So Christ dwell in our hearts through faith or in other words Christ dwell in our hearts through the teachings of Christ that we kept in our hearts.

    Yes, we heard :
    For God, who said, "Let light shine out of darkness," has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ. -2 Corinthians 4:6

    In obedience to God, we let the teachings of Christ shine out of the darkness of our hearts ! For the teachings of our Lord Jesus Christ gives us the knowledge of the glory of God.

    So when the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ in our hearts ! We need to remember what apostle Paul have spoken:

    so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith'that you, being rooted and grounded in love, -Ephesians 3:17

    The purpose that we beseech our Heavenly Father in prayer so that He strengthen our hearts through His Holy Spirit.

    What needs to be strengthen in our hearts?
    Our hearts need to be rooted and grounded in love of Christ.

    How ? By obeying what the Lord have taught us to be union with Him.

    So dear one, if you long to have relationship with Jesus, do what our Heavenly Father has said :

    Hear, O sons, a father's instruction, and be attentive, that you may gain insight, -Proverbs 4:1
    for I give you good precepts; do not forsake my teaching. -Proverbs 4:2

    Remember what Jesus have said:
    So Jesus answered them, "My teaching is not mine, but His who sent me. -John 7:16

    So dear one, draw near to Jesus by embracing His teachings in your hearts. Then your love for Him will grow to be rooted and grounded in His love.

    This is the newness of our lives in Him, that is, the life in love who Jesus Christ loved us and gave Himself for us as a fragrance offering and sacrifice with a sweet smelling aroma to God.

    Attached Files:

  19. aiki

    aiki Regular Member

    1 John 4:16-19
    16 We have come to know and have believed the love which God has for us. God is love, and the one who abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.
    17 By this, love is perfected with us, so that we may have confidence in the day of judgment; because as He is, so also are we in this world.
    18 There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love.
    19 We love, because He first loved us.

    If love casts out fear, it stands to reason that the reverse is true, too: fear casts out love. In other words, you can't love Jesus when you fear him as a Judge and Punisher. And if you don't love Jesus, it is impossible really to enjoy him as he intends that you should. Besides, the First and Great Commandment God gives to us isn't to go to church, or to pray, or give money but to LOVE God with all of your being. (Matthew 16:24-25) Obedience to God starts with loving Him!

    How do you come to love God, to love Jesus? Here's what the Bible says:

    1. Know and be thoroughly convinced of God's love for you. (1 John 4:16-19)

    Have you given yourself time and space to carefully study and ponder God's great love for you? Have you done so while asking God to drive deep into your heart and mind His incredible love for you? God intends that you should love Him because you are deeply convinced that He loves you.

    2. Invest in your relationship with God. (Matthew 6:21)

    "Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also." We all possess "treasure": time, energy and money. And where we invest that "treasure" determines what will possess our heart. If you want your heart gripped by God, you must place the "treasure" of your life in His hands. Give God much of your time, energy and money. Invest in Him, in your relationship with Him. This is how every relationship we want to develop must develop.

    3. Submit to God throughout every day. (Romans 6:13, 22; Romans 12:1)

    God wants from us His own holy, perfect love. And He has given us that love in the Person of the Holy Spirit. (Romans 5:5; Galatians 5:22) If we are saved, the Holy Spirit lives within us (1 Corinthians 6:19-20; Titus 3:5; 1 John 4:13), being for us all that we need to be who God wants us to be. But, if we aren't living in constant submission to the will and way of the Spirit, we cannot enjoy His spiritual "fruit" in our lives. The Spirit will not force his transformation of us. We must choose to be shaped and changed, coming to love God deeply and well as a result, by placing ourselves under the Spirit's leading and authority constantly.

    God and Jesus (and the Holy Spirit) are one God. To love one is to love the other. If you want to love Jesus more, though, see above.

    Fear of the sort you're experiencing is never from God. It comes, actually, from a kind of selfishness, from a desire to protect yourself, which is why God never urges you to fear Him this way. The "fear of God" the Bible recommends is an "awed respect and reverence" for God, not the terror of a slave under the hand of a hard and cruel Master. So, saturate your mind with the truth of God's love for you. Consider it often and carefully, and settle yourself into it. This is where walking well with God begins.

    1 John 4:9-10
    9 By this the love of God was manifested in us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world so that we might live through Him.
    10 In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins.

    John 3:16-17
    16 "For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.
    17 "For God did not send the Son into the world to judge the world, but that the world might be saved through Him.

    Romans 5:6-9
    6 For while we were still helpless, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly.
    7 For one will hardly die for a righteous man; though perhaps for the good man someone would dare even to die.
    8 But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.
    9 Much more then, having now been justified by His blood, we shall be saved from the wrath of God through Him.

    Romans 8:15
    15 For you have not received a spirit of slavery leading to fear again, but you have received a spirit of adoption as sons by which we cry out, "Abba! Father!"
    Last edited: Mar 18, 2021
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  20. Emily7584

    Emily7584 New Member

    United Kingdom
    Thank you :)