On the job, I tend to be too busy to worry about it. I just work through it and get through the day. Afterwards, when I get home, it sometimes takes its toll. I’ve seen a lot of people die over the years, from infants to the elderly, violently or peacefully, from illness and injury. I’ve treated victims of child abuse, domestic assault, sexual abuse, and violent crime. I’ve been yelled at, cursed, spit on, punched, kicked, groped, and threatened. (Most emergency department personnel have, of course...none of this is unique to me). But I’ve also seen great acts of compassion, touching moments, great love shown.
I deal with it by trying to distract myself when not at work. In my position, I am not on call, so when I am not at work, I don’t think about it. I pray, I distract myself with hobbies, I have been active in my church, I enjoy time with my wife and kids. It helps me to have a spiritual grounding in Christ. I think a lot of cynicism and outer hardness seen in some emergency personnel comes as a protective coping mechanism to deal with the harshness that occurs. But sometimes it gets to me [shrug]...that’s life, I guess.