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Why Virginity Matters

Discussion in 'One Bread, One Body - Catholic' started by Michie, Sep 21, 2011.

  1. Michie

    Michie Human rights begin in the womb. Supporter

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    Glancing at a list of saints’ feast days that fall during this week, I see this listed for September 23:
    St. Thecla, Virgin and Martyr

    I always used to pause at that oft-used description of the saints. The martyr part made sense. But why virgin? To make it a point to highlight that aspect of a person’s life seemed a little…personal. To use internet parlance, it struck me as TMI. I knew that the problem must be with me, and not with a tradition of the 2,000-year-old Church, but I never could figure out why that designation was so important.

    Then I began to notice something: Our society has lost the concept that it is possible to live a fulfilling life without having sex. And this fact alone is responsible for some of the worst scourges that plague the modern world. For example:

    Read more: http://www.ncregister.com/blog/jennifer-fulwiler/why-virginity-matters?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+NCRegisterDailyBlog+National+Catholic+Register&utm_content=Google+Reader#When:2011-09-21#ixzz1YdRZGgtz
     
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  2. PeterTheGimp

    PeterTheGimp Guest

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    It is a shame that the celibate lifestyle takes such a beating in the world at large.
     
  3. Chrystal-J

    Chrystal-J the one who stands firm to the end will be saved Supporter

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    So true.
     
  4. Fantine

    Fantine Dona Quixote Supporter

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    By age 30 95% have had sexual experience.

    Virginity is becoming obsolete.

    Even most of the younger religious sisters I know were previously married, with divorces and annulments. Some even have grown children.

    And, as usual, some orthodox columnist comes up with the bright idea that the problem is virginity--there aren't enough of them. One can have a fulfilling life without sex.

    I think that people who have fulfilling lives don't spend their lives thinking about sex--either having it OR avoiding it. Even the most sexually active people in the world probably spend less than 2% of their lives engaged in sexual activity.

    Let's stop thinking so much about sex and think about relationshps--with God, our family, our friends, our romantic friends. Let's think about having emotionally transparent, emotionally healthy relationships with all of them.

    Even in religious communities interpersonal relationships are of primary importance.

    As humans we need to be connected. A relationship without sex can be vibrantly healthy and enriching--but a sexual relationship without emotional intimacy is barren and lifeless.

    So let's stop thinking about having or avoiding sex as the goal. Let's think about loving God and enjoying meaningful relationships that help us grow into the beautiful people God wants us to be.
     
  5. epiclesis

    epiclesis Legend

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    Maybe I'm being a snob (it would be the FIRST time in my WHOLE life), but I was really excited to read this article after reading the title of it, and was very disappointed once I got through the article.

    Seems like it could have had a better article for something so very important and special. It certainly wasn't convincing or information-filled enough for me to pass on the article to someone engaging in pre-marital sex to try and knock some sense into them.
     
  6. princess_ballet

    princess_ballet Senior Veteran

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    Two of the comments stood out to me:

    Why don't male saints ever have the label "virgin."

    And it must sound like sunshine and lollipops coming from someone who is married and, presumably, enjoying a healthy sex life.


    :sigh:
     
  7. Memento Mori

    Memento Mori Guest

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    Virgin was a term for women, so that's why you don't see it applied to men. Obviously we use it differently today. A man who labels himself a virgin isn't calling himself a young maiden. :p
     
  8. sylverpiano

    sylverpiano unworthy

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    Hi there!

    My virginity was taken from me at knife point. That was my one and only sexual experience. I have led a celibate life ever since.
     
  9. MikeK

    MikeK Traditionalist Catholic

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    The funny - no, actually not funny at all - thing is, the virgins and martyrs the author of the article holds in high esteem are people who, rather than allow themselves to be raped, let their assailants kill them. Frankly, I've never understood why these are people we should emulate. I admire their faith, but I doubt very much that God would prefer that any of us let an assailant take our life than our virginity.
     
  10. princess_ballet

    princess_ballet Senior Veteran

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    Right. But the fact is, it just never mattered if guys were "virgins."
     
  11. benedictaoo

    benedictaoo Legend

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    that and well, they'll rape you anyway...

    I don't get those stories... and this opens a whole nother can of worms because is this God doing this? and I ask seriously? he'll put a rapist in a saints path to give us this example..

    I dunno- its all so weird to me.

    and the Saint who says, don't rape me, you are sinning and your soul is worth too much to commit rape- okay, lead them into murder... that's good for their soul.

    and ah, if you are raped, you are not being impure.

    This is ridiculous.

    The Saints example is NOT what ppl turn it into.
     
  12. WarriorAngel

    WarriorAngel I close my eyes and see you smile Supporter

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    Virginity and its preference in serving God is in scriptures.
    If this is TMI, someone doesnt read the Gospels or Apostles very often.

    Go figure, seeing the comments of the writer.

    Chastity needs to be talked about - loud and proud.
     
  13. jackpetersen

    jackpetersen Newbie

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    A chaste soul is more important to me than technical virginity.
     
  14. Aces High

    Aces High Veteran

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    Let's not forget a large amount of these "extremist" views towards celibacy is largely because of the incompetence of various Churches in the last millennia to handle matters regarding sexuality correctly, from theologians asserting correct sexual positions in bed, to authoritative ramblings about the evils of it, to completely avoiding the issue altogether.

    This is simply a response to all of that starting about 50 years ago. I think finding the middle-ground is important, how can anyone here try and tell someone with same-sex tendencies, that they can still lead a fulfilling life without the sex? If I were in that position, I would want nothing to do with a religion or Church. Even though it's probably true; there are other things out there than sex, and you can achieve a lot without it, but we are all sexual beings (apart from a few, who have no inclination at all?) and it would be completely frustrating, it does nothing but raise more questions which aren't really answered as of yet.
     
    Last edited: Sep 28, 2011
  15. Ration

    Ration Certified Brony

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    I've always been of the opinion that it shouldn't matter. If you want to lose it, go for it, and if you want to keep it, you shouldn't be ridiculed for that fact.

    Sex is fun, but it certainly isn't the be all and end all.
     
  16. Rebekka

    Rebekka meow meow meow meow meow meow

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    My thoughts exactly.

    But then again, I've always had mixed feelings about martyrdom to begin with, especially since the church condemns suicide so much.



    Oh, and some of you are under the impression that virginity didn't matter for guys, from the church's point of view. No, you're wrong, it did. No double standard there (and yes, the bible is very clear about it as well, also for men). There are a lot of virgin male saints as well. If you look at paintings of saints you will often see them holding a lily - if they do, they were virgins. Male or female. Very interesting, art history. :thumbsup:
     
  17. Rosary Crusader

    Rosary Crusader Guest

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    The Church teaches that it is wrong to seek or martyrdom. To compare martyrdom to suicide is highly insulting, especially since the martyr's blood is the water that nourishes the seeds of Holy Mother the Church.
     
  18. Rebekka

    Rebekka meow meow meow meow meow meow

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    Well sorry for insulting you then. You know, there are similarities, and as such there is ground for comparison.
     
  19. Catherineanne

    Catherineanne Well-Known Member

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    I am truly sorry this happened to you.

    If you were my daughter I would tell you that your virginity was not taken from you. Rape is about power, not about sexual experience.

    Therefore, regardless of biology, you are still a virgin before God, and you will remain one until you choose to engage in intimacy with someone of your own free will. :hug:
     
  20. Catherineanne

    Catherineanne Well-Known Member

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    I think the story of Joseph and Potiphar's wife would beg to differ. :)
     
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