Why so much emphasis on the "unequally yoked" verse?

[PixieSunbelle]

So will you be giving a portion of your income to the church? Because thats his money too and maybe being an unbeliver he doesn't want to give away his money to a group that he disagrees with?

We don't go to church at the moment. I haven't found one I feel is right for me, nor do I have a way to get there unless I attend my mom's church which is not for me.

 

[Luther073082]

We don't go to church at the moment. I haven't found one I feel is right for me, nor do I have a way to get there unless I attend my mom's church which is not for me.

But what will you do when you are able to attend church? Have you discussed it at all?

What about your children? Are you having them? Will they attend church with you?

I'm just saying there is more to this then just respecting eachother's beliefs.

 

[PixieSunbelle]

But what will you do when you are able to attend church? Have you discussed it at all?

I'd probably have to get my license to do so or not go at all. We've discussed it and he isn't thrilled with the ones around here. As it stands I am not sure when I'll go. I thought maybe I could find one to go to with my sister but she got her car taken away when she got a dui.... so that's out the window.
I'm perfectly fine with him not going to if he doesn't want to as long as he'll take me to visit some once in awhile. I'd rather not push him... that usually has the opposite effect.

It doesn't help that my church of choice has this girl there that has butted-heads with him since high school. In our earlier years of dating shes tried breaking us up... so yeah, he won't even set foot into the parking lot of that one.

What about your children? Are you having them? Will they attend church with you?

No kids. I can't have them anyways. If we did though then we do have some differences but we don't plan on it at all.

I'm just saying there is more to this then just respecting eachother's beliefs.

I agree. It just depends on how far you are willing to compromise.
And I wouldn't mind attending church without him if I had someone else to go with... or take me for that matter. I got to find one first though- I've been to the ones in my area over the years and theres very few I'd want to attend.
My mom's just doesn't make me feel at "home". I feel like an outsider and want to leave as soon as I get there. Obviously your not supposed to want to leave so its not right for me. I'd rather not attend the church where my boyfriend's unfriendly school-mate goes, the other prohibits women/girls from wearing pants and i disagree with that so i dont want to go there either...

 

[Luther073082]

I agree. It just depends on how far you are willing to compromise.
And I wouldn't mind attending church without him if I had someone else to go with... or take me for that matter. I got to find one first though- I've been to the ones in my area over the years and theres very few I'd want to attend.
My mom's just doesn't make me feel at "home". I feel like an outsider and want to leave as soon as I get there. Obviously your not supposed to want to leave so its not right for me. I'd rather not attend the church where my boyfriend's unfriendly school-mate goes, the other prohibits women/girls from wearing pants and i disagree with that so i dont want to go there either...

And that statement gets to the bottom of it right there. You are comprimising your own faith and your obedience to God in order to marry this man. You are putting him above God. See the first commandment.

Myself, I am not able to comprimise my obedience to God for a marriage. Thats why I had to be patient and marry someone who was not only a Christian but also a Lutheran. Because I can not and will not put any woman, including my wife above God.

Personally, I would get your license, be able to move on your own, find your own church and start attending. You are 25, you aught to by now be able to move competantly.

Then I would personally forget about someone who doesn't match with my faith and find someone who does. Obey God and put him first in all things. I'm not saying you have to attend a church with which you do not agree on doctrine. But you should find one that you do agree with on doctrine.

 

[moreruthlessjezebel]

Luther is making some very valid points there. Get a license - very odd you don't have one.

Having a license will let you stretch your church finding net a bit more. I guess living in the south is a bit different since there are 6 churches on the road I live off of within the stretch of a mile. I'm pentecostal, and even I feel uncomfortable at churches where I'm expected to wear long skirts and grow my hair out long - I donate to locks for love, so I grow it out until the minimum required length and then chop it all off. If I fall over, more of me is showing if I'm wearing a skirt at the time as opposed to pants. I can understand it, more power to them, but I feel uncomfortable at most of the churches that do that. Half of the people don't really care if you do or don't, but the other half, you might as well be a heathen.

It's so very important. I can't imagine dating a non-pentecostal, not to mention an atheist or agnostic. The way that he worships thrills me, and if my worship weirded him out, it would just be a no go. It's a huge part of my life, and if the other huge part of my life can't get along with it, something is wrong.

 

[PixieSunbelle]

And that statement gets to the bottom of it right there. You are comprimising your own faith and your obedience to God in order to marry this man. You are putting him above God. See the first commandment.

My boyfriend did not make me not go to church. I chose not to simply because I found my mom's church to not suit my needs.

Myself, I am not able to comprimise my obedience to God for a marriage. Thats why I had to be patient and marry someone who was not only a Christian but also a Lutheran. Because I can not and will not put any woman, including my wife above God.

...i don't want to find someone else.

Personally, I would get your license, be able to move on your own, find your own church and start attending. You are 25, you aught to by now be able to move competantly.

I do not want my license. I won't even ride bikes or be in control of any type of vehicle.
...doing that gives me panic attacks and would result in a crash xD
I wouldn't want to live completely on my own anyway...

Then I would personally forget about someone who doesn't match with my faith and find someone who does. Obey God and put him first in all things. I'm not saying you have to attend a church with which you do not agree on doctrine. But you should find one that you do agree with on doctrine.

I don't want to find someone else. I found the only person I can see myself having a life with.

 

[Johnnz]

Bless you for being so honest.

I know some 'mixed marriages' that have worked very well indeed.

John
NZ

 

[PixieSunbelle]

Luther is making some very valid points there. Get a license - very odd you don't have one.

Having a license will let you stretch your church finding net a bit more. I guess living in the south is a bit different since there are 6 churches on the road I live off of within the stretch of a mile. I'm pentecostal, and even I feel uncomfortable at churches where I'm expected to wear long skirts and grow my hair out long - I donate to locks for love, so I grow it out until the minimum required length and then chop it all off. If I fall over, more of me is showing if I'm wearing a skirt at the time as opposed to pants. I can understand it, more power to them, but I feel uncomfortable at most of the churches that do that. Half of the people don't really care if you do or don't, but the other half, you might as well be a heathen.

It's so very important. I can't imagine dating a non-pentecostal, not to mention an atheist or agnostic. The way that he worships thrills me, and if my worship weirded him out, it would just be a no go. It's a huge part of my life, and if the other huge part of my life can't get along with it, something is wrong.

I know of a lot of churches in my area. Most of them are not my denomination or have rules that I've never had to follow such as the "women only wear dresses, have long hair, etc". Those aren't for me at all.
Again, I have no interest in getting my license. Ever. I don't care if someone wants to pay me a million dollars to get it and ever drive again. I still don't want it.

 

[DYOLF]

Are there any other Christian reasons for not dating/marrying a non-Christian other than the "unequally yoked" verse? (2 Corinthians 6: 14-18)

That's pretty much the only verse I ever hear quoted. It seems strange to have this one verse place so much emphasis on this subject when there are many verses in the Bible which do not get nearly as much emphasis and are swept under the rug like:

"Whoever does any work on [the Sabbath] must be put to death." Exodus 35:2
"If anyone curses his father or mother, he must be put to death" Leviticus 20:9.

I'm not saying this to offend, I'm genuinely curious.

And I'm not even saying I disagree with not dating a non-Christian. I'm dating a Christian myself and love having God present in the relationship. I'm just wondering, why not sweep the unequally yoked verse under the rug and say its okay to marry non-Christians. I mean, after all, we don't kill people who work on the Sabbath, right?

I also don't know if this is in the right forum...

The Israelites werent allowed to marry gentiles because the gentiles would turn Israelites' hearts against God.Solomon loved many foreign women and he ended up in idolatry.When you get married and consumate the marriage you become one with the person you are married to.You are the temple of the Holy Spirit but the other person is not and that creates all sorts of problems for you there

 

[jkpeach1]

Dear Lightbearer,
Praise the Lord, it sounds like your spouse has come to know Jesus as Savior. However, if you keep everything in context, I Corinthians 13 is saying if you are ALREADY married to an unbeliever, stay with them and show them Christ's love rather than leave, which would push them further from God. We can tell from other passages that marrying an unbeliever as a Christian is wrong though. Not only does it make it more difficult for the believer to remain faithful to God, but it also creates great potential for terrible grief if those loved ones (& unsaved children) die unbelievers! Thankfully, God forgives, but we still have to suffer the consequences for our sins. We need to honor & obey Him in response to His love and care for us.

 

[VictoriasImage77]

I can't stand the whole "unequally yoked" thing. Sometimes people make it more about people's official status as a "Christian" or "Non-Christian" than where there heart is truly at with God.

When I was in high school, this neighbor guy and I were head over heels for one another for years. Just were totally in love with one another, we'd spend tons of time together outside school, etc. But he wouldn't officially date me because even though I was a virgin and loved God and Jesus and lived like a good Christian girl, I was a Catholic and according to his non-denominational church, I was not a true Christian, and therefore not "equally yoked" with him. He ended up dating a girl from his church instead of me, which was really sad because we both knew (and so did everyone else including his girlfriend) that we liked one another and would have made a great couple. That devastated and hurt me for years, I really took it to heart. It took me years to realize that he was pretty dumb after all if couldn't see past artificial lines drawn in the sand by his church. Funny though....the girl he dated later ended up having 3 kids out of wedlock with someone else and generally taking a very non-christian view on life.

Sometimes people focus too much on what very specific verses of the old testament say without any regard to context, etc. I do think it's better for two people to be at least in the same religious genre for the sake of having God as the center of the relationship. But what really matters is someone's heart.

 

[ImperialPhantom]

This is one of those areas where people are quite possibly the most prone to making the Bible fit their own standards and interpretations. The only verses there are the Unequally Yoked verse (2 Corinthians 6:14-18) and 1 Corinthians 7 (do not leave your nonbelieving spouse, because they are saved through you). Yet, people invent new standards to make themselves and their standards for their future spouse seem ever more holy, but all they're really doing is increasing the likelyhood that they'll remain single for life because their standards caused them to miss out on some great people at different points in life.