Why is showing emotion looked down upon?

[Christgirl67]

I just do not understand this concept at all.I understand men and women have different ways of expressing emotions,but I find it odd that society paints anyone having emotions,especially crying,as something to be ashamed or embarassed of.What happened to being compassionate and understanding all people express pain or handle emotions differently.

 

[EzekielsWheels]

Well we see many instances of crying in the bible, in particular in regards to David's psalms. We also see in the story of Joseph that he cried after seeing his brothers, but he went aside privately to weep so that people would not see him do it in public. Now Joseph was a head of state but I believe there is an expectation that men do not show such emotions publicly. On the other hand in the story of the prodigal son the father runs in the streets overcome with emotion at the return of his son so it's hard to say where the bible comes out on it.

I think it comes down to context. Business settings are probably not places to be overly emotional but familial settings are different. We are supposed to have self-control but I don't think that means emotional repression, we're all different in the ways we express ourselves and I agree that there should be tolerance for the different types of emotional expression.

 

[Christgirl67]

Well we see many instances of crying in the bible, in particular in regards to David's psalms. We also see in the story of Joseph that he cried after seeing his brothers, but he went aside privately to weep so that people would not see him do it in public. Now Joseph was a head of state but I believe there is an expectation that men do not show such emotions publicly. On the other hand in the story of the prodigal son the father runs in the streets overcome with emotion at the return of his son so it's hard to say where the bible comes out on it.

I think it comes down to context. Business settings are probably not places to be overly emotional but familial settings are different. We are supposed to have self-control but I don't think that means emotional repression, we're all different in the ways we express ourselves and I agree that there should be tolerance for the different types of emotional expression.

I agree with it all depends on the setting,I just think it is odd too how it is looked down upon for men to show emotion.I know men are not as emotional as women,but anything can cause someone to break down from time to time.

 

[JustRachel]

No! Jesus wept.

 

[John 1720]

I just do not understand this concept at all.I understand men and women have different ways of expressing emotions,but I find it odd that society paints anyone having emotions,especially crying,as something to be ashamed or embarassed of.What happened to being compassionate and understanding all people express pain or handle emotions differently.

Hello Christgirl67,
I've got one verse for those who think that:

• John 11:35 Jesus wept.

 

[Norman70]

Anger too is an emotion. I was wondering if I should start a new thread but to begin I will post here. In discussion the question has arisen as to whether or not we should apologise for showing our emotions?
In particular, did Jesus apologise to the money lenders after His display of anger?

 

[Christgirl67]

Anger too is an emotion. I was wondering if I should start a new thread but to begin I will post here. In discussion the question has arisen as to whether or not we should apologise for showing our emotions?
In particular, did Jesus apologise to the money lenders after His display of anger?

I don't think anyone should apologize for showing emotions.Situations effect everyone differently, so I think allowing a person to show their emotions is fine.But I think it's different when it comes to anger.If a person becomes angry and pushes their anger on someone else, in that situation they should apologize.

 

[EzekielsWheels]

I don't think anyone should apologize for showing emotions.Situations effect everyone differently, so I think allowing a person to show their emotions is fine.But I think it's different when it comes to anger.If a person becomes angry and pushes their anger on someone else, in that situation they should apologize.

Hmm now this is a complicated one and I've read a variety of opinions. The Lord Christ said be angry and do not sin. So my read is that anger is not a sin but acting out our anger is. What the Lord did was out of righteous anger and so he did not sin. The Lord commanded Gideon to chop down an idol, that would be considered vandalism or destruction of property but it was commanded by the Lord so it was not sin. Same with Christ's actions.

Anyways, the temple literally belonged to Jesus Christ as he was God so he could do whatever he wanted because 1) he's God but also 2) it's his property and they were in a sense trespassing and vandalizing/defiling his property with their peddling of wares.

I don't necessarily know where I stand on us as Christians acting out in righteous anger. I actually think if you're led by the Spirit to do so it is not sin but you are on very very dangerous ground and need to be very mature in Christ in my opinion before you can even think to do such a thing. Back in the day Christians would destroy pagan temples because they said it was the Lord's will. Was it? I don't know but it's possible.

So the answer to your complicated question is its complicated.

 

[Christgirl67]

Hmm now this is a complicated one and I've read a variety of opinions. The Lord Christ said be angry and do not sin. So my read is that anger is not a sin but acting out our anger is. What the Lord did was out of righteous anger and so he did not sin. The Lord commanded Gideon to chop down an idol, that would be considered vandalism or destruction of property but it was commanded by the Lord so it was not sin. Same with Christ's actions.

Anyways, the temple literally belonged to Jesus Christ as he was God so he could do whatever he wanted because 1) he's God but also 2) it's his property and they were in a sense trespassing and vandalizing/defiling his property with their peddling of wares.

I don't necessarily know where I stand on us as Christians acting out in righteous anger. I actually think if you're led by the Spirit to do so it is not sin but you are on very very dangerous ground and need to be very mature in Christ in my opinion before you can even think to do such a thing. Back in the day Christians would destroy pagan temples because they said it was the Lord's will. Was it? I don't know but it's possible.

So the answer to your complicated question is its complicated.

I see what you mean.For my answer,I more so was trying to say allowing someone to grieve or feel emotions towards a situation is ok because everyone is different.But I kind of put anger in a separate box because anger can get out of hand easily,and I think controlling one's anger is important.I think allowing people to express feelings of happiness or sadness should not be looked down upon,but anger is a different story at times.

 

[Norman70]

I am not sure that anger can be separated from other emotions. It is quite possible to hurt people by being happy or sad at inappropriate moments just as much as anger can frighten or even hurt.
Therefore the display of any emotion, even righteous anger, could warrant an apology. I like to believe Jesus did apologise to the money lenders, and also turned the other cheek.

 

[Christgirl67]

I am not sure that anger can be separated from other emotions. It is quite possible to hurt people by being happy or sad at inappropriate moments just as much as anger can frighten or even hurt.
Therefore the display of any emotion, even righteous anger, could warrant an apology. I like to believe Jesus did apologise to the money lenders, and also turned the other cheek.

That makes sense,I agree

 

[Dave-W]

I find it odd that society paints anyone having emotions,especially crying,as something to be ashamed or embarassed of.

It is certainly not a biblical norm for people to not express emotion. But it is a cultural expectation, probably coming from the "stiff upper lip" of our British cultural ancestors. It has been compounded by the modern mechanistic age for us to become machine-like.

I had my emotional response beaten out of me in early grade school. Dad would not have a "crybaby" boy in his house.

 

[Miles]

There's a time and a place for displaying emotions. However, I think wearing one's emotions on one's sleeve can be dangerous. There are people in this world who will prey upon that, and tug at your heartstrings to manipulate you. Although I don't think showing emotion is categorically a sign of weakness, it can be unwise in mixed company.

 

[Not David]

I, as a college student, might be supported to show emotions; however; people especially women will look at me as someone who isn't fit to be in a leadership position or even in a relationship.

 

[Christgirl67]

I, as a college student, might be supported to show emotions; however; people especially women will look at me as someone who isn't fit to be in a leadership position or even in a relationship.

I kind of feel like that is a double standard.College students are stereotyped as emotional just because of how hard college is,and it is accepted.But a man showing emotions over something in his life is stereotyped as weak,I just do not understand that.

 

[SolomonVII]

Crying over death is not looked down upon. Crying over a boo boo is embarrassing to witness.

 

[Christgirl67]

Crying over death is not looked down upon. Crying over a boo boo is embarrassing to witness.

That makes sense

 

[Willie T]

Crying over death is not looked down upon. Crying over a boo boo is embarrassing to witness.

And, therein lies the bigger question. What should, and should not, be considered a "Boo Boo?"

 

[SolomonVII]

And, therein lies the bigger question. What should, and should not, be considered a "Boo Boo?"

I think that our bodies decide a lot of that for us before we are even conscious of how we feel about it. We discern each other’s feelings at the visceral level first and foremost.

 

[Dave-W]

I see what you mean.For my answer,I more so was trying to say allowing someone to grieve or feel emotions towards a situation is ok because everyone is different.But I kind of put anger in a separate box because anger can get out of hand easily,and I think controlling one's anger is important.I think allowing people to express feelings of happiness or sadness should not be looked down upon,but anger is a different story at times.

I agree. Expressing any emotion is ok, as long as it is done at an appropriate time and in a controlled way.

We control them, they do not control us.