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why is porn so bad?

Discussion in 'Addictions & Substances' started by Lifelong_sinner, Jun 4, 2021.

  1. Lifelong_sinner

    Lifelong_sinner Well-Known Member

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    hello all. I have a question, for single people, why is porn so bad exactly? why are porn/ masturbation so bad? I don't see how single people can survive without them. I need someone to explain to me why I am supposed to hate it when I think its unfair that married people get to enjoy it, yet us single people are to suffer with it. I don't think that's fair.
     
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  2. dóxatotheó

    dóxatotheó Orthodox Church Familia

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    three main categories of sin are the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life (1 John 2:16). Pornography definitely causes us to lust after flesh, and it is undeniably a lust of the eyes. Pornography definitely does not qualify as one of the things we are to think about, according to Philippians 4:8. Pornography is addictive (1 Corinthians 6:12; 2 Peter 2:19) and destructive (Proverbs 6:25-28; Ezekiel 20:30; Ephesians 4:19). Lusting after other people in our minds, which is the essence of pornography, is offensive to God (Matthew 5:28). When habitual devotion to pornography characterizes a person’s life and he/she continues in sin without seeking help, making no attempt to stop or feeling no desire to change his/her behavior, it demonstrates the person may not be saved (1 Corinthians 6:9-12).
    For those involved in pornography, God can and will give the victory. Are you involved with pornography and desire freedom from it? Here are some steps to victory: 1) Confess your sin to God (1 John 1:9). 2) Ask God to cleanse, renew, and transform your mind (Romans 12:2). 3) Ask God to fill your mind with things that are true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, and commendable (Philippians 4:8). 4) Learn to possess your body in holiness (1 Thessalonians 4:3-4). 5) Understand the proper meaning of sex and rely on your spouse alone to meet that need (1 Corinthians 7:1-5). 6) Realize that if you walk in the Spirit, you will not fulfill the lusts of the flesh (Galatians 5:16). 7) Take practical steps to reduce your exposure to graphic images. Install pornography blockers on your computer, limit television and video usage, and find another Christian who will pray for you and help keep you accountable.
    What does the Bible say about pornography? | GotQuestions.org
     
  3. Osmotic

    Osmotic New Member

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    Good morning mate. I struggled with pornography and masturbation in the past so I hope that I can offer you some things that helped me better understand my position, and to repent, and walk in the Spirit.

    Rom 8:7 Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be.
    Rom 8:8 So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God.

    God has called us and set us apart from the world. We are to be in the world but not of it. When you view pornography and masturbate, you are essentially abusing yourself and God's glorious creation. You are reducing yourself to a series of impulses that you refuse to control and giving in to lust, as well as viewing and enjoying sinful behavior. I say these things to my shame because I have done the same exact thing numerous times so please don't think that I am condemning you because I condemn myself and writing this only makes me feel more guilty for my past idolatry, my self-worship.

    2Pe_2:10 But chiefly them that walk after the flesh in the lust of uncleanness, and despise government. Presumptuous are they, selfwilled, they are not afraid to speak evil of dignities.
    1Jn_2:16 For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.

    A whole series of sermons could be done on this but ultimately when you put yourself before God, you tell Him that you know what is best for your life, and that you don't think He knows what you need. You say in your heart "why should you deny me this good thing?" when really the only way to live a good life is to live by Gods statutes and commandments, and until we lean fully on Him we will continue to abase ourselves and walk in the flesh, to which we ought to be dead.

    Rom_6:2 God forbid. How shall we, that are dead to sin, live any longer therein?
    Rom_6:11 Likewise reckon ye also yourselves to be dead indeed unto sin, but alive unto God through Jesus Christ our Lord.

    What is it that you want? To gratify the endless lusts of the flesh? Walk in the righteousness of life and light that is Christ.

    Gal_6:8 For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting.
     
  4. chilehed

    chilehed Veteran

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    Pornography consists in removing real or simulated sexual acts from the intimacy of the partners, in order to display them deliberately to third parties. It offends against chastity because it perverts the conjugal act, the intimate giving of spouses to each other. It does grave injury to the dignity of its participants (actors, vendors, the public), since each one becomes an object of base pleasure and illicit profit for others. It immerses all who are involved in the illusion of a fantasy world.

    By masturbation is to be understood the deliberate stimulation of the genital organs in order to derive sexual pleasure. Masturbation is an intrinsically and gravely disordered action. The deliberate use of the sexual faculty, for whatever reason, outside of marriage is essentially contrary to its purpose. For here sexual pleasure is sought outside of the sexual relationship which is demanded by the moral order and in which the total meaning of mutual self-giving and human procreation in the context of true love is achieved.

    No one's ever died because they didn't engage in sexual activity. No one ever will. All it takes is a desire to comform to God's will for our lives and the discipline to act on the grace he gives us to do that.

    I'm not aware that very many people say you're supposed to hate sexual activity, and that idea certainly isn't compatible with Christianity.
     
  5. GOD Shines Forth!

    GOD Shines Forth! Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Who says they are? There are many essentially sexless marriages. How do you think they feel, dealing with lack when plenty is "supposed" to be theirs? Porn and masturbation are a problem for them as well. We all have to learn to control our own bodies.
     
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  6. zoidar

    zoidar Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Can you honestly say that you approve of the life those "porn-actors" live? Would you approve of yourself living like them? If not, then how can you justify yourself watching it with pleasure, since you know what they do is wrong.

    Masturbation is another matter, that I think has to be answered separately.
     
    Last edited: Jun 7, 2021
  7. Dr. Gluckenstein

    Dr. Gluckenstein New Member

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    You're removing the whole element for what God intended sex to be for! No wife, no procreation, no loving intimacy reserved for one woman. Alone, binding your oxytocin to an image a woman you're unlikely to see again.

    Bf (from a man's perspective) said it makes you feel less enthused to actually find a real woman, and depletes your self-confidence. He said there are studies that show that it affects the pursuit of an actual mate because it seems unfavorable compared to the easy, instant release.
     
  8. Lifelong_sinner

    Lifelong_sinner Well-Known Member

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    I never have been married, nor will I ever get married. and that's my point, I don't want t be tyed down. I don't hate women, but I do think marriage isn't for everyone. but that doesn't address the issues of how to deal with our hormones.
     
  9. zoidar

    zoidar Well-Known Member Supporter

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    One thing that has helped me is when I understood porn is people serving satan. They are not born again Christians, they belong to the devil and they do his will. So we take part in that when we watch porn.

    What you are to do with your urges, that you have to find out. I would say it's much better masterbating without porn, than indulge in other peoples sins.
     
  10. Eftsoon

    Eftsoon Well-Known Member

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    Pornography changes the way men see women. It makes them into sexual objects. The actresses are robbed of dignity and soul. They become objects for your desire. You take this consciousness into your relationships with women, and it changes the way you relate to them. Sometimes the change is drastic. A pornogrpahic film is an act of violence. The producers make conscious choices to strip the actresses of their humanity so they can be consumed.

    The mindset adopted when people consume pornography is totally opposed to the mindset you need in a loving relationship.

    For me, the worst thing about the whole industry is that it feeds on suffering. Many of the actresses are there to maintain addictions, or because of trauma and abuse. Sexual violence is rampant in the industry also. Pornography is sometimes outright human exploitation (trafficking and prostitution etc)
     
  11. Dr. Gluckenstein

    Dr. Gluckenstein New Member

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    Ah, okay. Well, the Bible also talks about how it is sometimes best not for a man to be married.

    I think I understand now, though, why you are asking the question. This is what you've chosen to do, and you're having trouble seeing the issue with it, despite it being considered a sin.

    Now, Paul said in 1 Corinthians 7:29-35 that it is best for a man not to marry in order that he may devote himself to God, and using porn is not devoting yourself to God, but rather feeding back into the cycle of destruction and temptation that Satan wants for us, not God. It may also weaken your willpower in other ways, too, I figure.

    Technically, the way to deal with your hormones, as it says here, is to marry, if one cannot control himself.
     
  12. Will Joseph

    Will Joseph Member

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    You don't have to hate porn. I personally used to hate sexual behavior during my initial goal to stop sexting. But the hate sometimes led to hate towards women, and the bible somewhat warns about hate or wrath, so I decided to realize that sexual behavior might be bad or damgerous for me without my hating it.

    The reality is that regardless of whether I hate sex or not, I can get HIV or herpes from someone. Condoms can break and don't always cover all the skin that a virus has infected. So learning about the dangers of sex has been more effective in my goal towards avoiding porn and avoiding sexting than simply hating sex or porn.

    Anyhow, I used to have a porn addiction. Porn can be bad for at least three reasons.

    One reason is that porn can promote misogyny. The title of porn videos tend to give information, referring to women with derogative words and terms. A frequent porn observer might then begin to refer to or think of women through those derogatory terms, especially if looking at any woman offline might make them think about a woman in porn videos.

    Another issue is sin. The title of porn videos can sometimes note that the video is about incest, bestiality, adultery, and etc. The bible warns against these sexual behaviors and they are considered sins or not acceptable sexual behaviors. Observing porn is an indirect way for people to support those sinners, because porn producers can get revenue from ads that you watch. Basically you are observing sin when watching some porn. Observing sin might not be healthy, especially if the porn producer expects the observer to like or keep watching the videos.

    Another issue is crime. Depending on laws in your land, porn can be illegal (like child porn) or contain illegal activity (like prostitution or vouyerism.) So you are basically observing crime, and the issue is very similar to observing sin.

    Another issue is that the bible seems to directly warn of the dangers of looking at women lustfully.

    “But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.”- Matthew 5:28

    One last issue might be that the poen encourages sexual behavior. Frequent porn observers might tend to act more sexually than men who don't watch porn. Sexual behavior can be dangerous for many reasons including sexually transmitted diseases, crimes (like prostitution,) and sins (like incest or fornication.)
     
  13. bèlla

    bèlla ❤️ Supporter

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    I don't hate porn. I love myself. That's why I don't watch it. It's the same reason I'm abstinent. There's no upside to being enslaved to something you can't admit. If it was good you could tell others without fear of shame or condemnation.

    What you're essentially saying when you rely on porn for stimulation is I'm a loser. You have no ability to find someone who'll love you and desire your companionship. You don't believe you'll have a rich sex life.

    So you opt for the cheap substitute thinking something's better than nothing. Making out to a screen is pretty pathetic when you see it for what it is. If you could have the same you'd realize its empty.

    ~bella
     
  14. Lifelong_sinner

    Lifelong_sinner Well-Known Member

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    Thanks for calling me a loser. Its not like the rest of my family have told me that my entire life for never getting married. But i do suppose its true.

     
  15. bèlla

    bèlla ❤️ Supporter

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    Who are you going to believe. Them or God? He didn't call you that.
     
  16. TheWhat?

    TheWhat? Ate all the treats

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    Where I'm at with this, currently, to avoid seeking to be justified by law and falling away from Christ, is that while liberty is essential, sex-related actions are necessarily different than any other thing we can have liberty in. It's a different reality than, say, foods, because matters of sex and intimacy are inexorably linked to love, which the whole of the law hinges on and can be said to be the spirit of the law. The reality of some appetites, like having your bacon at breakfast, doesn't put us at odds with the Spirit quite in the same way as sexual activities could.

    That said, one doesn't have to commit a sexual act to end up as a malicious, back-stabbing enemy of God, who created sex, and who may very well prefer to save a prostitute over an asexual enemy.
     
    Last edited: Sep 9, 2021
  17. TheWhat?

    TheWhat? Ate all the treats

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    An interesting and relevant fact, also, is that Aquinas was in favor of prostitution for the good of society, whereas no respectable theologian today would seem to dare to suggest such a thing. He did not think it was morally right, he thought it should not be illegal, but it does go to show how malleable our collective sense of morality really is, how much it has and can change while we are essentially blinded by our societies' sense of self-righteousness.
     
  18. Lifelong_sinner

    Lifelong_sinner Well-Known Member

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    i think you hit on a big problem for us. Societal norms can dictate sinful ways, and a younger generation growing up with that may not think anything about it. This leads to a progressively more and more sinful society. I have to wonder if sodom and Gomorrah fell in this manner.
     
  19. TheWhat?

    TheWhat? Ate all the treats

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    Indeed. There was an interesting post on the subject this morning on how someone killed a family because he suspected sex-trafficking, or some such madness

    “Do you know why I killed your parents?” he allegedly asked the girl. “They’re sex traffickers.”
     
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