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Why does it seem that sometimes prayers fall "on deaf ears"

Discussion in 'Christian Advice' started by aflower4God, May 4, 2011.

  1. aflower4God

    aflower4God observant petal

    Please allow me to explain.
    I have prayed for two things lately and it seems like I am talking to air.
    PLEASE KNOW that most of my other prayers I feel that the Lord is listening but the reason I say this about the two things I pray about just seems like wasted words cause nothing happens.
    Why is that, why is it that some prayers get answered and some do not.
    LIKE one is so easy for God to full fill and that is to send me the RIGHT guy. Considering that I can't leave my home most of the time for another reason I still try to get out there. Example I have to get food, GOD is so powerful he can allow me to find a guy at the store, AND YES I go to the same store to get food like 3 times a week, I am not a weekly food shopper.
    I can't get to a church PLUS they are so cold the ones I went to. My job coach is activly looking for a job for me and I am seeing a therapist, she is very helpful.
    BUT I can not for the life of me understand why these two things that I pray for (a true love, the right guy and a dear friend to have as a daily pen pal) will not come true. It is like God is putting NOTHING on my heart about these two issues. I TRY really I DO, but I don't get it.
    WHY does some prayers fall on "deaf ears" so it seems?
    PLEASE I BEG YOU not to suggest that I "need to get out there" I DO the best I can with my social anxiety.
    I just want your view point as to why this happens, some prayers on "deaf ears" Should I JUST STOP asking, am I acting like a little kid to God, you know how kids ask for candy to their mom's and after a while the mom's just does not pay attention to the question/request.
    I never thought God would tune out prayers, but it seems that is what he is doing to me. NO ANSWER NOTHING!
    PLEASE I would love to hear your wise advice and KIND advice about this matter.
    God bless you.
    BTW I am not mad at God, no, JUST VERY CONFUSED and hurt about this, it gets so frustrating after a while, espeically at my age! :sigh:
  2. Dear aflower4God,

    Do not despair when it seems as if God is not hearing your prayers. There are times in the life of each believer when our Heavenly Father draws back a little bit so that we can learn to walk by faith and not by sight. When it is the right time for you--when you have learned to depend solely upon God and not upon other humans, He will bring into your life the right humans to accompany you on your earthly journey. Be at peace. God is bringing you into a time of refining--a time when He, Alone, will be your friend and soulmate. It is a part of the Christian journey.

    All is well.


  3. fm107

    fm107 Psalm 19:1-4 and Romans 1:20

    United Kingdom
    First of all God doesn’t answer every single prayer of ours. It has to be in accordance with his will:

    1 John 5:14
    This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.

    Also, you need to rely on God’s timing of things and not your own. He knows what is best for you better than you do. And he cares for you more than you care about yourself.

    The bible makes clear that some prayers are not answered for certain reasons, you must decide whether these reasons are applicable to you.

    James 4:3
    When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.

    James 1:6-7
    But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord

    James 5:16
    Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.

    If they aren’t then God tells us to keep praying and not to give up.

    Luke 18:1
    Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up.

    Philippians 4:6
    Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

    And always remember:

    Matthew 6:8
    your Father knows what you need before you ask him.

    Matthew 6:33
    But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

    Psalm 37:4
    Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.

    Be patient, don’t lose faith. Have confidence in God and remember all the things he has done in your life. Take encouragement from that and trust fully in God. Sometimes prayers can take years before they are answered but when they are we appreciate them all the more.

    May God bless.
  4. EphesiaNZ

    EphesiaNZ It's me! Who else could it be...

    I feel that God just waits until the last possible minute on occasions to deliver on our prayers, maybe as a test of our faith and strength in Him.

    When you pray for this "right guy" do you tell God about the qualities and character he should have? If not, then it maybe a bit difficult even for God to deliver if he doesn't know what you want. Sometimes I think if we ask too much for something it has more of a negative impact on us directly, so I would suggest ask now and again just to remind Him of your needs. You know how it his with God, you may have the dream of meeting your "mr right" at the store but God may have him waiting somewhere else just waiting for you to find him - he may even be on this forum somewhere!

    My wife was praying for many years to find her "perfect man" <- ok, that's my term :)

    Seriously, good things do take time and it usually creeps up on you when you least expect it. If you don't mind I just said a small prayer for you.

    God Bless
  5. lutherangerman

    lutherangerman Senior Member

    Well I could offer you a pen pal friendship. But not every day, because I am already busy with many blogs, but every 2 or 3 days? I have social anxiety too. I am a 32 year old believing christian.

    About a guy I can't help, because I am not single anymore :D.

    But I can tell you my story: for 10 years I pursued an atheistic girl from South America. I was so obsessed with her that I wasn't really paying enough attention to other girls even when some of them showed interest. I didn't understand it was obsession for a long time. Then I got a bit more sober. I went to a hospital program where a counselor helped me understand in much kindness that I had an obsession with that woman, not a true love. In fact it was sinful even because this girl actually got a boyfriend at which point I should have seen it was time for me to leave. Well, after that counselling session and after Jesus helped me see how it was sinful (in much kindness of God and even meekness and humility!), I gave it up. 1 day later I met a woman in chat with whom I am in love now, and she with me. We already plan for marrying and I am starting to get everything in motion with an own flat and job again etc. And it's all looking good, particularly because my girl has such patience with me and my limited abilities (I have schizophrenia). She is someone I can really trust with everything. She isn't looking for someone to make her rich, just someone she can love and can have kids with. And she's a sincere, loving christian that has her own relationship with Jesus Christ. It's perfect.

    About friends and boyfriends generally, you must keep an eye open. Generally it doesn't hurt to simply contact people you get to know about online, and which you find interesting and nice. The difficult thing, for me anyway, is that sometimes I loose interest in my online acquaintances and then I feel the desire to cut myself loose and forget about online life. But then I try to remember wisdom, and the online friends I have are of the patient kind who are generous with my mistakes.

    Don't be afraid and just get to know people. Make up your mind to avoid sex before marriage and sex talk and you will leave a good impression and if the guy doesn't turn out like you want him to be, you can separate again easily without too much pain. Don't be afraid to insist on chastity, charity and wisdom - the world says this is silly and cowardly, but the world is wrong, these virtues protect our dignity.
  6. ezeric

    ezeric HE loves me too.

    Ok, the first thing I would ask is are you getting other prays answered?
    The ONLY way of knowing you are 'praying right' is that you get prayers answered.

    Lastly, remember that GOD always answers prayers by fixing you first, then
    working on others.

    Spirit works from the inside out.
    Man works from the outside (but never gets in).

    I guarantee, that if you rest in your christian walk, and allow HIM to
    help you, fix you, heal you and all you have to do, is simply 'believe in HIS HUGE LOVE for you' which is un-conditional and never failing. Then change (s) will come.

    Everything in HIS KINGDOM comes by GRACE - so no effort on your part.
    Zero effort just trust HIS LOVE.

    What are you afraid LOVE is going to do to you anyway?

    Here is a scripture the LORD gave me to give you:

    Delight yourself in the LORD, and HE will give you the desires of your heart.
    Psalm 37:4

    You will come through, because its for 'freedom JESUS died for you'.
    LORD bring my sister into larger freedom and deeper love.


    The Exchanged Life
  7. seajoy

    seajoy Senior Veteran

    One thing folks haven't mentioned here is that "no" and "not yet" are actually answers to our prayers. It may not be what we want to hear, but at times, these are the answers God gives us.

    I once prayed for God to take away an illness that I had. Eight years later, He said "yes." I prayed for 6 years for a grandchild. I am now going to get one in December.

    God can do anything, but in His great wisdom, doesn't always do things the way we want. But He does want us to continually come to Him with our desires and hurts. Continue praying - God is listening.
  8. briareos

    briareos Well-Known Member

    It seems you are losing faith in the Lord, do not do this, rather go to the Lord in prayer and ask for help to understand what is going on. Don't give up on the Lord because he will always answer you, he answers prayer and he also answers questions. You are beginning to believe that your prayers are simply not being answered, thats one reason right there.

    True love, that might be a long term prayer, your asking for marriage. That isn't the same thing as asking for the ability to get to work tommorow cus your out of gas.
    All the while, beyond just asking for things you need to remain close to the Lord and listen to him, he may tell you to do something that prepares you or places in in the position to receive the answer to that prayer. Say... you pray for true love and he tells you to go to this totally random church this sunday, if you can't hear his voice you'll never go there and you won't be able to meet the man he intends for you to meet there. You see? Or maybe he has answered your prayer but this man and yourself may not be able to meet for another year becuase of your very circumstances in your life? He will always meet your needs and take care of you, listen to him and he will give you insight on the matter.

    You have to be able to hear him speak also.
  9. LilLamb219

    LilLamb219 The Lamb is gone Supporter

    When we pray, we pray in the hopes that it is in line with His great will, not ours. So, think of your prayers and for those that haven't been answered in the way you wanted, reflect on whether you might be wanting to impose your own will in those situations instead of allowing God to be God and lead you in the way He has chosen.

    When God says no or not now like seajoy pointed out, it's for His purpose for us and we don't always get to find out what that purpose might be. But as Christians, we trust that He will always be there for us as He has said in scripture.
  10. Emmy

    Emmy Senior Veteran

    Salvation Army
    Dear aflower4God. When we pray and ask God for somethings, it depends what it is. If it only concerns us, it would be straightforward, but if it includes other people, it will take much time. We know that God does not force or coerce in any way, and how could God send you the right friend or partner? You have to do the choosing and ask God for His help to bring you together. And that might take much time because God does not force us in any way, and the partner you would like, might not know or like you. Be a bit more specific flower. I say this with love and send greetings. Emmy, your sister in Christ.
  11. Angeldove97

    Angeldove97 We wait, and watch, and wonder.

    Dear Sister,
    God did not send me my true beloved until many things had to happen. I had to learn how to properly take care of myself, I had to learn how to deal with my anxiety and depression, I had to finish my education, I had to become MUCH closer to God and trust in Him. I had to move out of my parents' house and learn how to live by myself (well also with my sister too). I had to learn how to heal my heart from past painful relationships.

    It took a long time of searching, of remaining in prayer, and trusting in God. It was ONLY when God saw that I completed each of those things that He brought Sean into my life. We will be married in about 2 months :)

    Perhaps what you don't realize is that RIGHT NOW is NOT the time for Mr Right to come to you. God knows what is best for you, not you-- as much as we would hope we could know what is best for us. Be patient. When you are finished completing the steps you need to: such as continuing to work with your therapist, finding a stable and good job, etc, then perhaps it will be the correct time God will bring Mr Right to you. Do not doubt Him: Our Lord truly knows what is best for us!