Why do unbelievers ask a pastor to do a funeral and then tell him not to mention Jesus?

[JustRachel]

Our pastor is asked to officiate many funerals and many of those are non-believers. They tell him not to mention Jesus at all. Of course, he always will find a way to bring up eternal salvation. Why do they even ask a pastor to perform the ritual? Seems like anyone could do this. My thought is that even the unsaved have some thought of and perhaps some desire for God no matter how much they object to hearing about him aloud.

What do you think?

 

[com7fy8]

I wouldn't do it. I would use the time to talk with them, but I would advise them that I am a pastor and I must honor Jesus.

By the way . . . the person who died might want Jesus to be named, and I would say the unbeliever has no right to dishonor what the passed person wants. Possibly, I would offer the unbeliever an opportunity to leave before I preached. But there can be prayer even right at the beginning; so it might not be possible for the unbeliever to be there only when Jesus is not mentioned.

So, even so, I would not try to control what the unbeliever does, even if the person had power to control the funeral of someone in my church. I do not feel it is my responsibility to control people of Satan's kingdom.

I am pretty sure it is reasonable that an unbeliever usually does not speak for everyone in that person's family, and often not for the one who died.

But in case a passed person is funeralized by an unbeliever, I can have a memorial service attended by my church's members, and the family and friends can be invited, and that unbeliever can boycott the memorial service. I don't have to control that.

 

[HTacianas]

Our pastor is asked to officiate many funerals and many of those are non-believers. They tell him not to mention Jesus at all. Of course, he always will find a way to bring up eternal salvation. Why do they even ask a pastor to perform the ritual? Seems like anyone could do this. My thought is that even the unsaved have some thought of and perhaps some desire for God no matter how much they object to hearing about him aloud.

What do you think?

My priest doesn't perform "at large" funerals, weddings, or baptisms. If you're not a member of the Church keepmoving.

 

[JustRachel]

I guess I wasn't clear. The dead person is an unbeliever as well as the person requesting the pastor, apparently.

 

[JackRT]

I have been to a few funerals that were all about Jesus and the deceased was an afterthought.

 

[ItIsFinished!]

Our pastor is asked to officiate many funerals and many of those are non-believers. They tell him not to mention Jesus at all. Of course, he always will find a way to bring up eternal salvation. Why do they even ask a pastor to perform the ritual? Seems like anyone could do this. My thought is that even the unsaved have some thought of and perhaps some desire for God no matter how much they object to hearing about him aloud.

What do you think?

Good afternoon Rachel.
To the unbelievers the gospel of Jesus Christ is offensive. To believers of God it is the power unto salvation which is obviously not offensive.
So for unbelievers to request Jesus not be mentioned is in a sort of way acknowledging His existence and His existence as God Himself which He clearly is.
That is why us believers are not ashamed of the gospel of Jesus Christ.

That fact is , God sets eternity in all of our hearts.
He places the knowledge of His existence in our very being and no one is left with any excuse.

Roman's 1:20 (KJV)
For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made , even his eternal power and Godhead ; so that they are without excuse.

That is the verse that came to me when I read you're post. Surely there is something precious in there for you to obtain to help answer some of your questions.

Your friend in Christ.
⚘

 

[nonaeroterraqueous]

They want the comfort without the Comforter. They desire the gifts but not the Giver. They want the hope and salvation, but not the Savior. They want what God has to offer, but they are against God.

 

[Dave G.]

In that case there no need for a pastor. The living unbeliever probably just wants that base covered to look good to guests that may be in attendance who are believers.

 

[andy b]

Our pastor is asked to officiate many funerals and many of those are non-believers. They tell him not to mention Jesus at all. Of course, he always will find a way to bring up eternal salvation. Why do they even ask a pastor to perform the ritual? Seems like anyone could do this. My thought is that even the unsaved have some thought of and perhaps some desire for God no matter how much they object to hearing about him aloud.

What do you think?

 

[andy b]

Maybe he's scared .of offending I have gone full circle and wear my cross with pride and talk about Jesus to all and sundry regardless if they are offended it not

 

[JustRachel]

I have been to a few funerals that were all about Jesus and the deceased was an afterthought.

Wouldn't that be proper? It is too late for the deceased to be saved if they weren't. Perhaps others could benefit from all that Jesus talk.

 

[Albion]

Our pastor is asked to officiate many funerals and many of those are non-believers. They tell him not to mention Jesus at all. Of course, he always will find a way to bring up eternal salvation. Why do they even ask a pastor to perform the ritual? Seems like anyone could do this. My thought is that even the unsaved have some thought of and perhaps some desire for God no matter how much they object to hearing about him aloud.

What do you think?

What I think is that people are strange. But if there is an explanation for this situation that you have described--and also for weddings--it is because many in the public have the idea that clergy are supposed to perform at all religious or religion-relate occasions, and that they are the people trained in it, regardless of who is asking for these services.

So if they are not religious, they think it is perfectly logical to ask for the service but to stipulate also that because they themselves are not believers, the minister needs to know to tailor the service to their views.

 

[2Timothy2:15]

Our pastor is asked to officiate many funerals and many of those are non-believers. They tell him not to mention Jesus at all. Of course, he always will find a way to bring up eternal salvation. Why do they even ask a pastor to perform the ritual? Seems like anyone could do this. My thought is that even the unsaved have some thought of and perhaps some desire for God no matter how much they object to hearing about him aloud.

What do you think?

For the same reason people show up on every Sunday to hear that same pastor. They think this is some sort of religious check box that makes them good with God while living a life in complete contradiction.

Better question is why would your pastor agree to do any funeral and agree to not mention Jesus......oh that is right, a paycheck.

 

[JustRachel]

For the same reason people show up on every Sunday to hear that same pastor. They think this is some sort of religious check box that makes them good with God while living a life in complete contradiction.

Better question is why would your pastor agree to do any funeral and agree to not mention Jesus......oh that is right, a paycheck.

I believe you are correct about the Sunday pew warmers! Our pastor doesn't accept pay for this (or from our church for that matter). I think he just wants to help and at least insert the message of salvation no matter what he's been told to omit.

 

[2Timothy2:15]

I believe you are correct about the Sunday pew warmers! Our pastor doesn't accept pay for this (or from our church for that matter). I think he just wants to help and at least insert the message of salvation no matter what he's been told to omit.

How is he inserting the message of salvation without Jesus? You know for a fact he is not getting paid for a funeral service? Or is that your assumption? If that is true it is very very rare.

There were a lot of people at my old church he did not think the pastor would lie or steal but he was doing both.

 

[JustRachel]

Well, I didn't start this thread to debate the righteousness of my pastor. I'm done now. Have a great day.

 

[JackRT]

Wouldn't that be proper? It is too late for the deceased to be saved if they weren't. Perhaps others could benefit from all that Jesus talk.

To me a funeral service should be focused on a celebration of the life of the deceased person not the evangelization of the congregation. That celebration could very well make mention of his/her faith and work in the church.

 

[essentialsaltes]

Our pastor is asked to officiate many funerals and many of those are non-believers.

It's hard for me to imagine this taking place. Is it a small town where there's only one church that is also the de facto community center? So there's no other place to have a gathering like this?

Or possibly it's what Albion suggested -- that it just seems fitting to some that a religious figure should preside over an event like this.

--

I had the flip side of things. As a secular celebrant I performed the marriage ceremony for two close friends. But because the bride's Southern family was religious, I was asked to include 'god' in the ceremony. The things we do for our friends.

 

[Desk trauma]

Wouldn't that be proper? It is too late for the deceased to be saved if they weren't. Perhaps others could benefit from all that Jesus talk.

My father in laws funeral was like that and while I know I am biased I found it disgusting. It wasn't even about soothing the mourners with all the talk of the afterlife it was the preacher taking advantage of a captive emotionally vulnerable audience.

 

[Desk trauma]

What do you think?

I think that it is people holding to ritual out of habit. I also think that it is dishonest of your pastor to take a job then violate the conditions that he said he would abide by.