What's The Top Reason For Divorce?

[OGM]

Im sure thats not what God intended, you dont think thats a little out in left field?

Janman,
I did not say it was my interpretation. But I know certain denominations and individuals that believe one cannot remarry until the ex dies. Many of these same people seem to believe in marrying young. The problem is that those who marry young (16-22) tend to have a high divorce rate. Yet many of them don't believe in remarriage or "M".

So now you have a person that maybe at the height of their libido who has had married sex that is now cut off from ever remarrying or having an SO until the death of the ex. In the U.S.A. over 50,000 people are 100 years old or greater. So it is very possible the ex may outlive you or that by the time the ex is dead; it will not matter.

Extremely depressing!

 

[janman345]

Janman,
I did not say it was my interpretation. But I know certain denominations and individuals that believe one cannot remarry until the ex dies. Many of these same people seem to believe in marrying young. The problem is that those who marry young (16-22) tend to have a high divorce rate. Yet many of them don't believe in remarriage or "M".

So now you have a person that maybe at the height of their libido who has had married sex that is now cut off from ever remarrying or having an SO until the death of the ex. In the U.S.A. over 50,000 people are 100 years old or greater. So it is very possible the ex may outlive you or that by the time the ex is dead; it will not matter.

Extremely depressing!

Its extremely stupid is what it is, its using 2 lines of scripture to destroy someones life, one has to ask themselves if thats really what Jesus was intending in famous 2 line mathew scripture. Jesus also later on goes to the samaritian woman who is living with a man and does not condemn her because she is not a pharisy. Thoes that are preaching these harsh views of mathew are the ones that Jesus will deal with harshly.

 

[Nobility]

thats all fine and dandy but who are you having sex with from puberty to age 25 that alot of high labido years to not be having sex.

Thats the issue. Also dating for a year with no sex is a pretty tall order (at least for the male).

Not everyone finds someone early on realistically! Who says you have to have sex with anyone, and yes it's a tall order but one I've seen my friends keep to. No exactly as hard as you make out - yes male friends not female.

My advice is to know them well, be friends first if you are able, and to not rush into marriage becuase rushing and getting married young STATISTCALLY means there are higher chances of divorce.

 

[mylife4his]

Janman,
I did not say it was my interpretation. But I know certain denominations and individuals that believe one cannot remarry until the ex dies. Many of these same people seem to believe in marrying young. The problem is that those who marry young (16-22) tend to have a high divorce rate. Yet many of them don't believe in remarriage or "M".

So now you have a person that maybe at the height of their libido who has had married sex that is now cut off from ever remarrying or having an SO until the death of the ex. In the U.S.A. over 50,000 people are 100 years old or greater. So it is very possible the ex may outlive you or that by the time the ex is dead; it will not matter.

Extremely depressing!

yep, i believe that. and can be depressing, if you worry. well i prefer that, but some people divorced when they were sinners. so somethings are unclear. just pray we stay together

 

[Romanseight2005]

The only thing that I will say is this. People who have never been married, should not judge people who have been, and got a divorce. I remember a person, years ago, who was staunchly against divorce, and he married a woman who filed for divorce after about a year. Now, obviously, if we are Christians, we should be living, and loving in a way, that would not even make the other want a divorce, and we ourselves should not ask, and walk in love. However, things sometimes happen, that neither person foresaw, and it happens.So, if you have never been married, it would really behoove you to be more cautious with your words on this subject.

 

[Romanseight2005]

Im not here to argue over doctrine. I just want the most healthiest marriage. WHAT things should I do to prevent divorce? The Bible isn't very clear except of what Jesus said. But was for the christians? Or Both sinner and christian? Idk, I won't worry about it. Because with God's help, I wont divorce

Seek the Lord, and let Him pick your wife, first. Secondly, love her, and share your dreams with her. Don't shut her out, let her be your partner. Be faithful to her. Be grateful for her. That's your part. Her part is to do the same. So, praying for discernment, so that God chooses your wife is really the key.

 

[Conservativation]

The only thing that I will say is this. People who have never been married, should not judge people who have been, and got a divorce. I remember a person, years ago, who was staunchly against divorce, and he married a woman who filed for divorce after about a year. Now, obviously, if we are Christians, we should be living, and loving in a way, that would not even make the other want a divorce, and we ourselves should not ask, and walk in love. However, things sometimes happen, that neither person foresaw, and it happens.So, if you have never been married, it would really behoove you to be more cautious with your words on this subject.

How does that man, whose WIFE filed a divorce, how does that contradict HIS beliefs on divorce?
he can be fully against divorce even as she divorces him. being against divorce doesnt mean we control others...just that its not for US. If he was a victim of unwanted divorce, so what?
Its like saying i knew a guy who was against stealing....then he was robbed, so be careful about being against stealing

 

[Psalm63]

Among evangelical Christians, Danny Silk identifies[URL="http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#%21/video/video.php?v=1108316668554"] why 2/3 of divorces are filed by women (click here)[/URL]

 

[McScribe]

I think that what is going to happen is that marriage as an institution is going to increasingly implode. I think that Christians need to focus more on agape love and less on eros, because the average person is not really equipped with the wisdom and experience necessary to deal with the power of eros. I think that as Paul said that men in particular need to focus less on the idea of being married and more on the idea of being men of God.

I think that Danny Silk is unjust towards men in this. While it is to some extent true, I feel it is also true that women don't really know how to love. People don't know how to. So I believe that marriage needs to stop being a christian ideal. I've known sikh and muslim marriages that were better than most christian marriages. I've heard pastors talk about how marriage--particularly heterosexual marriage--is in and of itself a good thing in the eyes of God. I disagree with this. This is as twisted as saying that government is a good thing in the eyes of God, or commerce, or parenthood. They're not GOOD, they just ARE. Goodness as I understand the Bible to be saying comes from our realization of our identity in Jesus Christ, not from what institutions we are involved with. Those are just means to an end.

 

[Conservativation]

I think that what is going to happen is that marriage as an institution is going to increasingly implode. I think that Christians need to focus more on agape love and less on eros, because the average person is not really equipped with the wisdom and experience necessary to deal with the power of eros. I think that as Paul said that men in particular need to focus less on the idea of being married and more on the idea of being men of God.

I think that Danny Silk is unjust towards men in this. While it is to some extent true, I feel it is also true that women don't really know how to love. People don't know how to. So I believe that marriage needs to stop being a christian ideal. I've known sikh and muslim marriages that were better than most christian marriages. I've heard pastors talk about how marriage--particularly heterosexual marriage--is in and of itself a good thing in the eyes of God. I disagree with this. This is as twisted as saying that government is a good thing in the eyes of God, or commerce, or parenthood. They're not GOOD, they just ARE. Goodness as I understand the Bible to be saying comes from our realization of our identity in Jesus Christ, not from what institutions we are involved with. Those are just means to an end.

True true.

LOTS of folks from faith or no faith have functioning marriages, and seem fine. Its bothersome when I hear Christians seeming to reject that that can even happen. Further, with all the heralding of marriage in church, its strange that its the one thing we supposedly cherish that we are not only the worst at, but totally are missing the mark about what CAN be good about it, what its purpose is, and how it fits into the walk...as McScribe says, it is NOT the walk....but it CAN fit into the walk. If we hand a hope in making it something almost like an idol....its gonna fail, and test your true faith.

Its almost these days something that since we cannot control others....we ought to always be able to get along fine, alone with God, if the marriage falls apart.

 

[McScribe]

Very apt what you said

Further, with all the heralding of marriage in church, its strange that its the one thing we supposedly cherish that we are not only the worst at, but totally are missing the mark about what CAN be good about it

is a really good point. If it is such a christian thing to do, why is it harder and harder to make it work, in spite of all the books being written, the seminars attended, the workshops worked through?

So Jesus is going along getting disciples and goes up to this one guy and says, "Come with me." Now we are assuming that at this point Jesus has already been demonstrating his awesome teachings and that this guy knows about it, because he says, "Absolutely I'll come, I've just gotta bury my dad." Jesus says, "Let the dead bury the dead."

That's pretty harsh. I mean imagine this: imagine that a university professor or boss or whoever says that--"No, you can't have compassionate leave to arrange for your father's funeral--chop chop." It's one of Jesus' harsher examples, I've always felt. I mean surely he could wait a few days?

I think that as he often did Jesus made these moments into lessons, demonstrating in life what was important. You see Jesus always saw the kingdom of Heaven as something imminent, as something life saving. I contrast this to Jesus' actions when it came to faith. Jesus often seems angry about matters of faith. Like why DON'T we have more faith?

The thing is, Jesus is the emissary of the Kingdom of Heaven, where life is GOOD. And here on Earth, life has become tainted deeply by evil. That's how he saw it; it was a lifesaving moment. It's like he had come by in a helicopter with a bunch of people he'd rescued and saw a guy on a rooftop surrounded by a flood, and asked him to climb up the ladder and get in. The guy says instead, "I have a few things to do; it'll just take me a few hours."

We do that a lot, I think. Jesus is there, hand outstretched, but we decide other things are more important than our lives being saved. Including our own theology. We need to stop worrying about marriage and start wondering about our salvation, no matter WHAT seems to be in the way.

 

[Romanseight2005]

How does that man, whose WIFE filed a divorce, how does that contradict HIS beliefs on divorce?
he can be fully against divorce even as she divorces him. being against divorce doesnt mean we control others...just that its not for US. If he was a victim of unwanted divorce, so what?
Its like saying i knew a guy who was against stealing....then he was robbed, so be careful about being against stealing

I agree that divorce is wrong. The point is though, that people who say they will never do it, because it can't happen, and then tell others they are wrong if they have been divorced, regardless of who instigated it, can be in a position where they are divorced. The man that used to tell others how wrong it was, became divorce. I need to clarify that he condemned others even when they were not the ones who filed, or made the choice to divorce.

 

[Key]

After reading this forum, I have come to conclude that the top reason for Divorce is.

(drum roll)

Lack of Acceptance.
​

I have no prophetic words to expound upon this, just, take it at face value and work with that.

God Bless

 

[Fangtastic]

I read the post title and what came to my head ???-ok first thing was : Dishonesty. It builds a web. Web gets bigger and it's hard to get out.

 

[HopefulFaithfulMI]

I'm married. The things that have made me consider divorce (all of which have occurred within the past year). Dishonesty, adultery, alcoholism, lack of taking responsibility.

The things that keep me married: Jesus, my faith, the promises I made and the willingness to keep striving to have a loving and sacrificial heart for my husband.

faith

 

[raleighdivorceattorney]

There are many reasons for Divorce. Some are as
1. Cheating your partner
2. Lack of Communication
3. Lack of Money
4. Inequality between men and women

 

[Thunder Peel]

Leaving the toilet seat up.

 

[CounselorForChrist]

The main reason for divorce.... sin. If not for sin divorce wouldn't exist. Now because of it we pick from any billions of reasons to divorce. Its crazy. Me and my wife don't even use the word. I say if anyone has even 0.00001% of thoughts in their head about possibly leaving if a time came in their marriage.... then I wouldn't marry them to begin with.

This is not saying you won't think of it of course. But if before marriage it already seems like it could be a feasible thing, then you are already full of to much doubt.

 

[ImaginaryDay]

There are many reasons for Divorce. Some are as
1. Cheating your partner
2. Lack of Communication
3. Lack of Money
4. Inequality between men and women

Hmmm...

'raleighdivorceattorney'

I smell a troll...

 

[ProudMomxmany]

We did EVERYTHING "wrong" and are still married almost 32 years later...we were teenagers, we were BROKE, our first baby showed up 16 days before our first anniversary, we spent long months apart due to his Naval career...we were not Christians when we dated and married. We didn't have stellar examples of healthy relationships in our respective families....

We never fought over money (still don't) because we never had any. We have a fairly "traditional" marriage although I had to be independend by necessity.