What to do if one of your Christian Children were homosexual?

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sunlover1

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Sure go ahead and get it if you want.

I mean I would tell them to leave or get help and I would rather they get help because I want them to get better.

You can obey Gods word to the T if you want that's fine I have no problem with that I just don't want to see people hurt by it is all because I have in the past.
Yes, I try to obey Him to the T.
He's way smarter than i am,
and He knows how to help our kids.
It's post number 78 above.
 
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Julie.S

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We know better than the Bible?
No way.
In the past people saw a person with a what we now know to be a mental disorder and would say they are possessed or along those lines in some places. That's the stuff I am talking about.
 
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godsgoond

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1 Corinthians 6:9-11 Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, (10) nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. (11) And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

Anyone claiming to being Christian, then willfully, purposefully, habitually practicing and engaging in sin, no matter what that sin is, is simply not a Christian.

If my child came to me and said that they were homosexual, I would explain to them, by the grace of God, that there is forgiveness in Jesus Christ for the one who repents of sin (including the sin of homosexuality, because God has clearly defined homosexuality to be sin) and trusts in Jesus Christ, has eternal life. But the one who remains dead in their sins against the holy, perfect and righteous and rejects the gift of grace that God offers in Jesus Christ, and dies in their sin will suffer His righteous wrath for eternity. And I would tell them that I don't want that for them. I want them to trust in the grace and mercy that God offers and for them to be saved from the depravity of their sin and to be made a new creation.

--------------

"I do not believe homosexuality to be a choice. I do believe it to be a sexual orientation that someone is born with."

You won't find support of this in the Bible. Sin is always a choice. And God designed everyone to be heterosexual, not homosexual.

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"I wasn't born bisexual or gay in any form so I have NO clue what it's like."

Experience is not what defines morality. God defines morality and only Him. You may have not been "born" a murderer, but do you understand that murder is wrong? You may have not been "born" a rapist, but do you understand that rape is wrong?

You don't have to experience something to know it is wrong. You look to the perfect standard: God.


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"I do however know what it's like to be born not "normal" and what it's like to be shunned by a majority of society. It sucks."

Feelings are not the basis of morality. A rapist may "feel" shunned, so because they feel shunned, does that make raping women ok? No, of course not. It is not wrong to feel shame when you are involved in something that is immoral as defined by God. It is the conscience, a gift from God, that feels shame when you sin. It is a warning system from God that you are not living in accordance with His will or His standards.

-----------
"I'm definitely against Gay marriage but, only because they call it marriage"

It is not marriage, regardless if man thinks that they can call it marriage. It is sin. God has defined marriage to be the covenant between one man and one woman. Any other form is simply not marriage.

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"Call it civil union or whatever and not a godly union such as Marriage and I'd sign the bill "

So calling sin by some other name suddenly makes it righteous?

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"How do we keep them in the Christian faith when... they can't help or control their sexual feelings"

1. You can't keep them in the Christian faith because if they continue a habitual practice of sin, they never were in the Christian faith. Secondly, you don't persevere the saints, God does.

2. Actually they can control their sexual feeling through repentance and faith in Jesus Christ. That is why they need the Savior.

------
"Encourage them to practice celibacy?"

Nothing in the Bible would support this thought. Try that with any other sin. A rapist or a murder is ok as long as they don't actually go out and rape or murder someone? No. An alcoholic is not ok to hang out at a bar as long as he does not have an alcoholic drink.

God commands us to repent of our sin, not passively ignore it. He also commands us to be holy, and we do this through sanctification and keeping our focus on Christ Jesus. God also tells us to flee from sin, not see how close we can get to it without actually sinning.

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"But, that feels wrong to deny them the right to be happy with someone."

This is the lie from the homosexual community. No one is denying homosexuals happiness. Their definition of "happiness" is completely corrupt and dishonoring to their bodies and to God. And as rebel sinners, no one has the "right" to anything.

"Because, I do believe that homosexual couples love each other and are happy."

Then you have bought into the lies that homosexuality promotes. Very large number of homosexual relations have very high levels of abuse. And the majority of homosexuals have no desire whatsoever to make lifelong commitments to one another (less than 1%). There are very high counts of homosexuals with report of significant damage to their bodies due to the depravity of their sexual interaction and placing foreign object in the body that should never happen.

-------
"We don't want our children to hate or resent us or hate or resent God because they are different than everyone else and are experiencing thoughts and emotions that they cannot control. That's why a majority of homosexuals turn away from God in the first place."

This is wrong. Homosexuals are homosexuals because they love their sin and hate God. It is not because someone challenged them in their sin.

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"There has to be a way for homosexuals to live happy lives and be Christian at the same time."

This is a very unbiblical thought. In many places Jesus warned sinners to "go and sin no more". He never told them to "go on sinning because your happiness is the most important thing".
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"I do not want to be one of those Christians who abandon homosexuals and I definitely wouldn't abandon my children for being homosexual or different in any way so, I'm not afraid of that and I do not think that abandoning your children because they're gay is not a good thing."

If a person does this, this is not what God teaches us. By the grace of God, Christians do not hate homosexuals, nor abandon them. At the same time, Christians will not affirm someone in their sin (whether that sin is homosexuality, lust, murder, lying or any other sin) as righteous, but rather warn them to repent of their sins and trust in Jesus Christ. It is one of the most loving things a person can do, is to warn them of the coming righteous wrath of God and how their is forgiveness and life to be found only in Jesus Christ.

You don't change your love/attitude toward that child but I advice you to intercede for that child by fasting and praying because it is a spiritual warfare. Children are greatest gifts from God. As long as you've done your best to raise that child, leave the rest to God. Things/events happened in our lives at the moment we don't understand but later on when we look back we'll realized that experience has drawn us closer to God. I believe most of time if God didn't allow certain things happen in our lives (story of Job), they would not have happened. Ask God what does He wants you to learn from this and tell Him you believe He is the sovereign God who is in control of your and your child's life.

Prayer suggestions:
In the name of Jesus binding the spirit of homosexuality. (look up online)
Pray for your child be filled with spirit of discernment.
Cover your child with Blood of Jesus Christ from top of his/her head to the bottom of his/her sole.

In Jesus name break satan's power over your child, pray for deliverance, deliver (your child's name) from spirit of homosexuality, and pray for true salvation in Jesus Christ.

Offer your child to God as Abraham offer Isaac to God.
 
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sunlover1

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In the past people saw a person with a what we now know to be a mental disorder and would say they are possessed or along those lines in some places. That's the stuff I am talking about.
I see.
Well, I'm just sharing what I "think" I would do or should do.
I mess up plenty as well, so God help us all.
 
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Armoured

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Did you know I know someone who may be living on the streets right now with a drug addiction? I went to prom with him and he was wonderful. I don't know what happened to him but I am really worried because he was not always like that.

You can kick your kids out and watch them wither away if you want but I find that to be cruel and slightly abusive. There are some things in the Bible that are illegal today and or not done anymore because we know how to handle said situations better now without causing further damage to a person.
Um, that was called sarcasm. Sorry it was too subtle.
 
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Armoured

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What you think is loving and what God thinks is loving may not be the same.
Tough love works well on me, when I'm too dumb to just listen lol.

I did not at all mean with the immoral people of this world,
or with the covetous and swindlers, or with idolaters,
for then you would have to go out of the world.
11But actually, I wrote to you not to associate with
any so-called brother if he is an immoral person,
or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard,
or a swindler-- not even to eat with such a one.
Thats great. What about all the other words you used that don't appear there?
 
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Neostarwcc

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First guys, I didn't state that engaging in sin was okay. When I made the statement of "Call what is now called homosexual marriage civil union." I did not mean to say "Sin is okay and these people should be practicing and engaging in sin."

What I had meant to say was, that there is nothing I can do about the sin so, basically just let it exist but, while it exists, don't call it marriage because, marriage is a sacred bond between a man and a woman. I mean, what can I personally do about sin in a world that is already corrupt and full of sin? I am not God. People choose whether or not to be Christian. It is a choice that has dire and eternal consequences, yes but it still is a choice. And, the world is going to reflect on sin. I was stating "Let the world be full of sin because there is nothing we can do about sin. There are people in the world that are so consumed with sin that they don't care and just sin anyway."

It's sad, I want to stop it but, there's nothing you can do to stop it.

If you claim to be Christian and walking the path of God than homosexuality is not something you should be practicing nor is any other sin. However, if you're not, I cannot judge them because I am not 100% free of sin either. None of us are. We only TRY to be free of sin.

That's what I was saying in that statement. Sorry for the confusion.


That being said, thanks for all of your thoughts and opinions. I'm behind on this thread so I'll be reading them all now.
 
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throughfiierytrial

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I would love and support my children, because to do anything else is to abdicate my responsibility as a parent. What matters is that I do my job; it's their job to figure out their role in society, not mine. It's my job to make sure they have a safe space in which to do that.

Edit: note that I'm not actually a parent at this time, and hopefully will not be for many years.

The biggest job or responsibility of a parent is to raise them with the knowledge and wisdom of the Lord, urging them to live their lives worthy of the Lord.
 
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throughfiierytrial

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Precisely my point.

-CryptoLutheran


We are all born in sin...we are under the curse. To be saved we have to repent and turn to the Lord for forgiveness and strive to lead a holy life. To deny that a sin is sin, especially where such sin is clearly spelled out for us in Scripture as sin, is to continue on in willful sin with a unrepentant heart. Such a person is not right with God...he/she lives under a delusion and must break away by the help of God.
 
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Neostarwcc

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it is a kind of mental disorder like the schizophrenia, the psychoses, the autism, the anorexia, and the bulimia - it had even been stated as such in the diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders prior to 1973 year, and it is also caused by devilish spirits, so, it is not advisable for a human being to be homosexual, Jesus and His true disciples cast the devilish spirits out of the possessed/affected people completely and permanently, but unfortunately for the last years/decades there have been no enough true exorcists and priests to sanctify/purify/cleanse such people so effectively

Blessings

Which is exactly why I say that I don't believe they choose to "be gay". I personally suffer from Schizo-Affective disorder which, is basically bipolar disorder and schizophrenia combined into one. I definitely didn't CHOOSE to have schizo-affective disorder. It is NOT a fun illness to have to live through every single day and I'm stuck with it for life. If I had a choice, I definitely would choose not to have to live through this illness every single day for the rest of my life. I also, do believe that it was an illness that I was born with. I remember being a child and symptoms of schizo-affective disorder. My posters used to move on their own and mock and riddicule me, I used to hear voices that always told me that I was pathetic and good for nothing, and that my father would never love me ...etc.

So, if the attraction to the same sex is in fact a mental disorder. That doesn't exclude that it can't be a mental disorder that people are born with. And they definitely do not choose to have abnormal sexual feelings. They choose to act on those sexual feelings and THAT is a choice. But, the feelings in themselves just come naturally. They aren't going to willingly choose to be shunned and hated by Christians. Especially when they want to follow God themselves. It's a trial that they must work through in their life, but I do not think that they choose to have these sexual feelings.

To start with, there is a difference between someone who is attracted to people of the same gender and someone who has sex with someone of the same gender, just as the is a difference between someone with alcoholism who is tempted to get drunk and someone who gets drunk. We all struggle with the temptation to sin, but the sin is always in the actions we choose, not in the temptation to do them.

If advertising didn't influence our desires, then a whole lot of people are wasting a ton of money. If someone grew up in an environment where they had gay parents, gay friends, gay role models, and were encouraged to have gay relationships while homosexual relationships were discouraged, then I would be very surprised if they didn't have a greater likelihood of being gay. However, the proof that homosexuality is not just something that you are born with is that people have had their orientation changed, so I think it is caused by a combination of both nurture and nature. However, even if being gay were purely genetic, then someone still has the choice of whether to sin through their actions, just like alcoholism is genetic and alcoholics still have the choice of whether to get drunk. They might think that getting drunk will make them very happy, just as we might think that other sins will make us happy, but something making us happy does not change something that is wrong into something that is right. God knows the right way for us to live and has give commands to His people for how to do so, so we should have faith in God by putting obedience to His commands above our own desires.

Pretty much exactly what I said above, I 100% agree with you.

I doubt you will be able to defend this claim Biblically, at least in the properly nuanced sense. Yes, I would agree that, Biblically, the "initial design" of humanity is presented in Genesis (allegorically, I believe, but that is not really central to the argument) as entailing a heterosexual orientation. But then the fall happened and all creation is changed. So I do not see how you can rule out the possibility that an innate homosexual orientation is a product of the fall, and not a willful choice that someone makes. Furthermore, it does seem rather implausible that someone would simply "choose" to adopt a homosexual inclination, given all the heat such a person would then end up taking, even in the somewhat more tolerant world of 2016.

Yes, the world fell and humanity became filled with sin but, like the person said Jesus also made a comment long after Adam and Eve were around that people were born straight so, he does have a point that can't be ignored.

These two statements are contradictory. One of them is not true.

Now that I give it a lot of though, they DO sound contradictory. Thank you for pointing it out.



Well, then, you haven't been keeping up with the research into homosexuality and its causes. What the research is revealing more and more is that homosexuality is a psycho-social phenomenon, not a genetic one. Family, culture, personality, friends - these all have far more to do with a person choosing homosexuality than anything biological. Geneticists have known for decades now that genes do not exert direct control over a person's behaviour. This is certainly true with homosexuality. So, right off you've got the wrong end of the stick in what you believe about homosexuality. Let me ask you this: If homosexuality is genetic, how is it passed on? Homosexuals don't typically reproduce. Since homosexuality is antagonistic, biologically-speaking, to reproduction, it should have been selected out of the human population long, long ago. But it keeps flaring up. And that's because it isn't a genetic occurrence, but a pscyho-social one. Here's another question: In some Muslim countries (Afghanistan, Pakistan, and the Arab Emirates in particular) there are places where over 50% of the men engage in sodomy and homosexual practices but none of the women do. If homosexuality were just a matter of genetics, why isn't there parity between the men and the women in regards to homosexuality in these places? The answer, I think, is pretty obvious - and in accord with what the research is establishing: homosexuality is not primarily biological in origin.

Homosexuality is not confusing at all -- if you believe the Bible. Paul the apostle wrote,

Romans 1:22-27
22 Professing to be wise, they became fools,
23 and changed the glory of the incorruptible God into an image made like corruptible man--and birds and four-footed animals and creeping things.
24 Therefore God also gave them up to uncleanness, in the lusts of their hearts, to dishonor their bodies among themselves,
25 who exchanged the truth of God for the lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever. Amen.
26 For this reason God gave them up to vile passions. For even their women exchanged the natural use for what is against nature.
27 Likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust for one another, men with men committing what is shameful, and receiving in themselves the penalty of their error which was due.


When men and women turn from God to make themselves and the things they desire their chief concern, "vile passions" result. It's that simple. I can understand that you have some sympathy for the homosexual person who is ostracized, but these days I don't see that this is the common experience of the homosexual person. Instead, I see homosexuals flaunting their perversion quite openly and bullying any who don't accept and celebrate their sin.



A very fundamental part of being a Christian, a disciple of Christ, is entering into a relationship with God whereby He transforms the Christian such that they become more and more a reflection of Jesus in how they live. Consequently, God is not looking to accommodate our sin. He says to the alcoholic, "Turn from your addiction and live under my control." He says to the adulterer, "Cease your sin and surrender your life to me." And He says to the homosexual, "Repent of your vile behaviour and walk rightly with your Maker." If you think you can be a disciple of Christ and carry on in the way you might be inclined to carry on, you don't understand what it means to be a Christian. Jesus calls all of his followers to die to themselves, to their inclinations and desires, and to follow him:

Luke 9:23-24
23 Then He said to them all, "If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow Me.
24 For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will save it.


Doing things our way is antithetical to the call of Christ. Being his disciple requires we set aside whatever proclivities, and desires, and goals we might have and be a living sacrifice holy and acceptable to God. (Ro. 12:1) This is what it means to be a Christian.

Christ's call to his disciples, to Christians, to deny themselves is predicated upon the truth that they can deny themselves - however strong their selfish, sinful impulses may be. The genuine Christian in whom the Holy Spirit lives has, in the Person of God's Spirit, all they need to deny themselves and follow Christ. So, the idea that homosexual's impulses are just too strong to be denied is a false one for the genuinely saved person. One who is born-again by God's Spirit, one who is truly saved and thus a genuine child of God, has the power of the God of the Universe residing within them and thus is without excuse in following the commands of their Saviour and Lord.



Two things: 1.) The Bible is crystal clear that anyone living in a homosexual manner will not enter into God's kingdom. 2.) God is not primarily interested in our happiness. What is far more important is that we are holy, and faithful, and loving, and true, and patient and just. And often in shaping in us these things, God will sacrifice our happiness.



Refusing homosexual sin doesn't mean you must abandon the homosexual sinner. Churches are filled with gossips, liars, thieves, the lustful and selfish. But they are walking with God and letting Him put to death their sin and transform them into Christ's pure and holy likeness. This is no less the case for the homosexual. Church is where they need to be. Not to be accommodated in their sin but to be freed from it.

Selah.

Alot of what you said makes sense.


If it were my child I'd say I'd love them. BUT lets say I had a son who was gay and 16. Lets say hes wanting to date a guy from his school. I'd tell him no. And he is not allowed to bring his BF to our house. I'd also say if he dates him outside of the house there will be consequences. Loss of use of electronics, no driving, no parties...etc. If he refuses and dates the guy anyways I'd tell him when hes 18 he has to move out then if he wishes to remain in a same sex relationship. Once hes out I would still love him and support him, however I will not support any part of his plans involving his BF. Such as wedding plans, vacation plans....etc. No money either if it means supporting his BF. Now, if he did not move out for some reason then I would kick him out.

Now, obviously before any of this I'd talk to him about his feelings for other men. Talk to him about the bible and what Jesus would think. Have him talk to a pastor. Maybe other people who used to be gay. I'd help him to not be gay. But like I said, once 18 hes on his own if he chooses to keep the lifestyle. Tough love I guess. I do believe (as someone else said) that lifestyle is possibly something to do with bad wiring in the brain. A mental illness. Or maybe something to do with the devil influencing them when they are young. On a side note I would not go to his wedding if he had one. To many parents of children like this who are christian will often accept EVERYTHING the child does. Including letting them bring their same sex partner to home. That teaches your child nothing. Though your child shouldn't be dating as a teen anyways. And sadly many parents become supporters of gay rights and essentially turn against God on this subject. Choosing your child over God is dangerous.

Honestly, my mother (My only religious parent) should have did that with me. I wouldn't have probably lost my way and became an atheist for part of my life. Instead my mother let me live with her until I was 26 years old. Allowed me to keep sinning and keep declaring that God wasn't real and there was no way he could in my "Flawless Logic".

While I probably would have hated my mother if she did that at 18 years old, as I grew up to be 30 like I am today, I would have forgiven her and realized that she only did the best thing for me.

My daughter is bisexual and has chosen her life. I have chosen mine and while we are here together on this world i will cherish her as long as I can. She knows the implications of her lifestyle and has excepted what lies ahead.

That being said I was pondering the question of will we, when we reach Heaven remember those of our loved one's who failed to enter God's kingdom? It would seem to me, that all such memories would be wiped clean because of the hurt and pain of not having them around.

Revelation 21:4 He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever."

I do not know what to say. All I can say is, keep praying.


As a gay Christian, I don't know why anyone, especially a Christian, would choose to be gay. It would be like asking to become second class citizen and to be excluded from your friends, family, and church while putting a big giant target on your back for people to tell you what a horrible human being you are.

I agree with you.

:(:hug: I'm so sorry.
She may say that she has accepted what lies ahead, but our God is SO Good, that He is able to
do ANYthing. Look at Saul/Paul! He slapped Him off that ride and blinded his eyes.. Paul sat up
right quick and had a conversion :D
He can do that for your baby girl too!
There are so many stories, they just don't get much press because the
"powers that be" are trying to blind our youth.
It's in vogue nowadays to be "open" ..
Lord give you comfort and grace to do this.

Amen.

I would love and support my children, because to do anything else is to abdicate my responsibility as a parent. What matters is that I do my job; it's their job to figure out their role in society, not mine. It's my job to make sure they have a safe space in which to do that.

Edit: note that I'm not actually a parent at this time, and hopefully will not be for many years.

Thank you for your advice, it makes a lot of sense. I will do that.

Beat them to death.

Umm... no.

We all were born in sin. And in sin every one of us has had wrong ways and tendencies and preferences. Homosexuality is just one "item" which can be in each sinner's "package deal" of sin. And you might remember how there were things you yourself could not "help". We all need God. Only with God is is possible to get free from our sin and sin problems. This is the same for all of us.

Our Apostle Paul says "we all once conducted ourselves in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, just as the others," (in Ephesians 2:3)

So, to me this means that Paul is saying that "we all" have been in slavery to some sort of "lusts", and "we all", then, have been the same as homosexuals, but just not specializing in the same lusts.

Well n:)w . . . isn't "sexual" really about reproducing, and not only how you get pleasure from sexual sensations? How you lust to get sexual pleasure is not quite the same has God giving you a drive to reproduce godly children for Him. I offer that God's drive is in His love, and is honest to attract you to the person you belong with in order to bring up children for Him. But lusts can be very not specific and unreliable, attracting people to even not humans . . . in order to get sensual pleasure.

"And love does not have us just using someone to get pleasure."

So, the real "preference" of gays and straights could, I consider, not be sexual, really, at all, but simply preference for pleasure which keeps them, unfortunately, away from how we could be enjoying sweet and tender intimacy with God in His very own love which is so better and feels so nicer than mere creature pleasure.

We were all born in sin; so each of us had things which were not right. But I'll "bet" you had items which humans might not like, but which would not be displeasing to God.

Because Adam and Eve fell, they got into a very wrong way of seeing what is good and what is bad. Look at how humans, can so speak badly of rain, for only one example. So, if rain could have feelings :) think how rain might feel! So, with God evaluate what really is needing correction, and what is very usable by God. And forgive all the people who did not know how to love you; because they are missing out on so much, if they do not know how to love. And become an example so you can be a true friend to every person, whether they know you are or not :)

The same as all of us, "they" need to trust in Jesus (Ephesians 1:12) and seek God for His correction. And He changes us out of our nature of sin so we are no longer available to being dominated and controlled by passions and feelings and emotions which just drive and waste us and "enough is not enough". With God, we become content and we are not focused on preferences for pleasure.

"'Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.'" (Matthew 11:29)

So, we do not judge and condemn gays to be unable to change. God is able, easily and breezily and beautifully. Jesus on the cross died with hope for any of us to become children of God in His own holiness > which does come with seeking our Father's correction > Hebrews 12:4-11. So, we do not discriminate against gays, by saying this is not as possible for them as for anyone else of us. And we do not discriminate by saying they don't need forgiveness while the rest of us do.

When you tell children what is for their own good, ones can say you "hate" them, or they can say they "hate" you! This is because of how Adam and Eve fell so they had their perception of good and evil backwards, even calling rain "bad" weather, when rain is so needed for us to have life on this planet. Humans in sin can be so backwards, because of Satan's evil spirit > Ephesians 2:2.

You need to make sure with God about what is really true, then be a good example of how you handle it >

"nor as being lords over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock." (1 Peter 5:3)

Learn how to love with your wife and other Christians, and children can feed on your example. And trust God who alone can make this work. It is not only a copy-cat thing, but how God spreads whatever is really in you to make your children the same way. So, make sure about what is really going in in you, in the sight of God!

"rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God." (1 Peter 3:4)

The Bible is very clear, how Jesus calls to "all", with the exact same hope > Matthew 11:28-30. No sinner is some special case. How you prefer to get your pleasure, by the way, is not your true identity. God is able to change each of us, out of our impossible personality things and the torments we have because of our fears and worries. We all have impossible things. And only God is able to cure us, in our nature. So, there is this hope for all of us > love "hopes all things" (in 1 Corinthians 13:7). So, we have compassion for any other person >

"He can have compassion on those who are ignorant and going astray, since he himself is also subject to weakness." (Hebrews 4:15)

I wouldn't wish my experience in high school on my worst enemy. I spent roughly six years convinced that I could overcome this, and that I was in bondage or whatever simply because I had these attractions, and those six years were the worst six years of my life. Alcoholics, gamblers, stalkers, adulterers, have to deal with the shame, guilt, and such that I did. The difference that those things are directed at what they've done not who they are. You don't become a target of bullies because you cheated on your boyfriend, your best friend doesn't stop talking to you because she doesn't want people to think that because you drink she does, your family isn't passive aggressively told to leave the congregation because your dad gambled a lot of money, you don't have to fear being kicked out by your parents because you told a lie, you aren't driven to a suicidal depression because you struggle with heterosexual lust, you aren't excluded from every sorority in your college because you stole something once. Until recently, I could get fired from my job just for being gay, and I'm still pretty sure that if I went to buy a house they could refuse my offer just because I was gay, I could go on. Please forgive me that I don't see what is so tempting about that. The sex and being in a relationship? I'd agree, but I'm still a virgin and the worst of my experiences came before I was in one.

Well I'd say that isn't my problem. We have free will. If you kill yourself then you answer for it. Me? I am disabled. When I was younger my health was SO beyond bad. I considered suicide. Could never do it though. I feared Gods judgment if I did it. I also realized death isn't the answer. Likewise if a LGBT kills themselves because a christian parent doesn't accept they are gay then its not the parent fault. We have to raise children right. More so you can "Accept" they are gay but still implement rules since it is your house.

What if you other kids who would be influenced by the gay child? This is why rules would be set in place. In the end if I am the parent, I'll love you but don't expect me to do everything you want like go to your wedding. I obey God over my child. BTW this isn't to say I wouldn't help my child or protect them. I would. Their my children.

Amen.

Jesus says that if we live for Him, we will be hated and killed by Satanic people. There are people who do not know how to love; not only do they hate us, but they do not love each other who are sinners in Satan's kingdom. But Jesus says, if we live for Him we will be evil spoken of, but rejoice > Matthew 5:13.

What's weird is that in their own sick and twisted minds they're deluded into thinking that they do know how to love.

If you truly believe it's a "mental disorder" you should really stop talking about it like it's a conscious choice.

Or do you think schizophrenics choose to have schizophrenia?

As someone with Schizoaffective disorder I can personally say, "Heck no". I'd LOVE to be cured of this awful disease.


That is EXACTLY what I needed to see/hear and what I was hoping I could find. Thank you!
 
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The Portuguese Baptist

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So, my wife and I were debating the other day that when we are blessed with our children, would we would do if one of our children was homosexual.

I do not believe homosexuality to be a choice. I do believe it to be a sexual orientation that someone is born with. Perhaps as one of the trials that the Lord sets up for us when we're born? However, I also do believe it to be against God and a sin in his eyes. So, I don't know... my stance on homosexuality is very confusing because homosexuality in itself and what causes it is so confusing. I wasn't born bisexual or gay in any form so I have NO clue what it's like. I do however know what it's like to be born not "normal" and what it's like to be shunned by a majority of society. It sucks.

I'm definitely against Gay marriage but, only because they call it marriage and marriage should be between a man and a woman. Call it civil union or whatever and not a godly union such as Marriage and I'd sign the bill (if I was a member of congress).

Anyway, back on topic. We both want to raise our children as Christians. So, this raises the problem. How do we keep them in the Christian faith when... they can't help or control their sexual feelings and a majority of Christians will judge them for being homosexual or in a homosexual relationship? Encourage them to practice celibacy? But, that feels wrong to deny them the right to be happy with someone. Because, I do believe that homosexual couples love each other and are happy.

We don't want our children to hate or resent us or hate or resent God because they are different than everyone else and are experiencing thoughts and emotions that they cannot control. That's why a majority of homosexuals turn away from God in the first place. There has to be a way for homosexuals to live happy lives and be Christian at the same time.

I mean, I can encourage them to be in a relationship with someone but, pray everyday for God to forgive them But, that goes against my own personal religious beliefs. Usually when I'm confronted with a sin I try to not keep doing it. If I encouraged my homosexual child to be happy in a homosexual relationship they wouldn't really be trying to stop the sin they're committing and how would that effect their souls or their Christian faith?

I do not want to be one of those Christians who abandon homosexuals and I definitely wouldn't abandon my children for being homosexual or different in any way so, I'm not afraid of that and I do not think that abandoning your children because they're gay is not a good thing.

I just... don't know. Why does this very topic have to be so controversial and confusing?

There are really two types of homosexuals:
  1. Those who realise that homosexuality is morally wrong, and who will work to try to stop. These are just regular Christians, like any other brother or sister, for whom homosexuality is just a temptation they are regularly faced with — much like many men are faced with inappropriate contentography, compulsive liars are faced with lying, easily angered people are faced with unjustified anger… All of these are sins, and homosexuality is just one more, for which some people suffer because they simply feel that inexplicable attraction for people of the same gender as we do for people of the opposite gender. But these homosexuals realise that it is wrong and are willing to fight the temptation and remain faithful to God.
  2. Those who think it is all right to be gay, and are willing to really start a serious relationship. These are not Christians. These are people who were born in a Christian family, but have chosen to abandon faith, because they just found out that there was something about it which they did not like. They think they have the right to be happy, the right to equality, the right to everything they want, without realising that it is wrong, God rejects it, and they cannot be saved if they go on like that, because 1 John 3:6 says: ‘No-one who lives in him keeps on sinning. No-one who continues to sin has either seen him or known him.’ Taking the same examples given in point #1, these people are instead like the men who choose to keep on watching inappropriate content (or, for that matter, the woman who follows a career in inappropriate content), the person who wilfully and unrepentantly lies whenever he/she feels like, or the person who gets angry for no reason and does not attempt to control himself/herself.
As such, in my opinion, the first step after your child tells you that he is gay is to figure out what kind of gay person he is. Two different approaches are called for, depending on which situation applies.

If your child is a gay person type 1, you should help him fight temptation, continually pray that God will help him, so that he may ultimately have a stable Christian life, without being constantly tormented by these gay thoughts.

If your child is a gay person type 2, then, in my opinion, you should do just the same thing you would do if he told you that he had converted to Islam, for example. If he thinks it is OK to be gay, show him the Bible verses that attest to the opposite, tell him of your absolute hatred for homosexuality, of how disappointed you are that this is true, and warn him that you will never support his relationship. But keep on loving him, and keep on praying that God will save him and convert him to become a Christian. At least, this is what I would do.
 
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graceandpeace

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So, my wife and I were debating the other day that when we are blessed with our children, would we would do if one of our children was homosexual.

I do not believe homosexuality to be a choice. I do believe it to be a sexual orientation that someone is born with. Perhaps as one of the trials that the Lord sets up for us when we're born? However, I also do believe it to be against God and a sin in his eyes. So, I don't know... my stance on homosexuality is very confusing because homosexuality in itself and what causes it is so confusing. I wasn't born bisexual or gay in any form so I have NO clue what it's like. I do however know what it's like to be born not "normal" and what it's like to be shunned by a majority of society. It sucks.

I'm definitely against Gay marriage but, only because they call it marriage and marriage should be between a man and a woman. Call it civil union or whatever and not a godly union such as Marriage and I'd sign the bill (if I was a member of congress).

Anyway, back on topic. We both want to raise our children as Christians. So, this raises the problem. How do we keep them in the Christian faith when... they can't help or control their sexual feelings and a majority of Christians will judge them for being homosexual or in a homosexual relationship? Encourage them to practice celibacy? But, that feels wrong to deny them the right to be happy with someone. Because, I do believe that homosexual couples love each other and are happy.

We don't want our children to hate or resent us or hate or resent God because they are different than everyone else and are experiencing thoughts and emotions that they cannot control. That's why a majority of homosexuals turn away from God in the first place. There has to be a way for homosexuals to live happy lives and be Christian at the same time.

I mean, I can encourage them to be in a relationship with someone but, pray everyday for God to forgive them But, that goes against my own personal religious beliefs. Usually when I'm confronted with a sin I try to not keep doing it. If I encouraged my homosexual child to be happy in a homosexual relationship they wouldn't really be trying to stop the sin they're committing and how would that effect their souls or their Christian faith?

I do not want to be one of those Christians who abandon homosexuals and I definitely wouldn't abandon my children for being homosexual or different in any way so, I'm not afraid of that and I do not think that abandoning your children because they're gay is not a good thing.

I just... don't know. Why does this very topic have to be so controversial and confusing?

As already noted, it doesn't require you to do anything. You just continue to be a loving parent.

The fact is, people don't choose to be gay, & efforts to change someone's sexuality are shown to be harmful & ineffective. If you want to get more info on human sexuality, visit the American Psychological Association (APA) website to read more.

As far as controversy in Christianity, it's true that Christians are divided on this topic. Some churches are gay-affirming, others are not. To learn why some churches are gay-affirming, you will need to read outside of this website, as I don't know if the site rules permit open discussion in this particular forum. The Gay Christian Network website hosts both sides of the conversation on this topic.
 
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Neostarwcc

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There are really two types of homosexuals:
  1. Those who realise that homosexuality is morally wrong, and who will work to try to stop. These are just regular Christians, like any other brother or sister, for whom homosexuality is just a temptation they are regularly faced with — much like many men are faced with inappropriate contentography, compulsive liars are faced with lying, easily angered people are faced with unjustified anger… All of these are sins, and homosexuality is just one more, for which some people suffer because they simply feel that inexplicable attraction for people of the same gender as we do for people of the opposite gender. But these homosexuals realise that it is wrong and are willing to fight the temptation and remain faithful to God.
  2. Those who think it is all right to be gay, and are willing to really start a serious relationship. These are not Christians. These are people who were born in a Christian family, but have chosen to abandon faith, because they just found out that there was something about it which they did not like. They think they have the right to be happy, the right to equality, the right to everything they want, without realising that it is wrong, God rejects it, and they cannot be saved if they go on like that, because 1 John 3:6 says: ‘No-one who lives in him keeps on sinning. No-one who continues to sin has either seen him or known him.’ Taking the same examples given in point #1, these people are instead like the men who choose to keep on watching inappropriate content (or, for that matter, the woman who follows a career in inappropriate content), the person who wilfully and unrepentantly lies whenever he/she feels like, or the person who gets angry for no reason and does not attempt to control himself/herself.
As such, in my opinion, the first step after your child tells you that he is gay is to figure out what kind of gay person he is. Two different approaches are called for, depending on which situation applies.

If your child is a gay person type 1, you should help him fight temptation, continually pray that God will help him, so that he may ultimately have a stable Christian life, without being constantly tormented by these gay thoughts.

If your child is a gay person type 2, then, in my opinion, you should do just the same thing you would do if he told you that he had converted to Islam, for example. If he thinks it is OK to be gay, show him the Bible verses that attest to the opposite, tell him of your absolute hatred for homosexuality, of how disappointed you are that this is true, and warn him that you will never support his relationship. But keep on loving him, and keep on praying that God will save him and convert him to become a Christian. At least, this is what I would do.

Thank you, that is very good advice.
 
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SavedByGrace3

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If you suggest to people they might and could be sodomites, then that suggestion is all it takes for a significant portion of the population to go that way. It is all in the head... there is no sodomite gene.
 
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God has clearly spoken what sin is and what it is not. And in John 8, God tell us to judge with a right judgment. I never said I was the sole source of defining that homosexuality is sin, God has spoken this, not me. Are you also not judging me? I never said I was without sin. Nor did I speak from self-righteousness. I am righteous only by the cross of Jesus Christ, by His grace alone.

But you failed to teach others about how to be sin free:

15 See that no one repays another with evil for evil, but always seek after that which is good for one another and for all people.
16 Rejoice always;
17 pray without ceasing;
18 in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
19 Do not quench the Spirit;
20 do not despise prophetic utterances.
21 But examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good;
22 abstain from every form of evil.
 
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What's weird is that in their own sick and twisted minds they're deluded into thinking that they do know how to love.
But I am finding that I still need to find out how to love. I can maybe boast to myself that I am so great, now. But God is able to correct us. And it is good to be encouraged about this.
 
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