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Featured What to do if one of your Christian Children were homosexual?

Discussion in 'Controversial Christian Theology' started by Neostarwcc, Mar 23, 2016.

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  1. Neostarwcc

    Neostarwcc Eternal life is a free gift. Amen. Supporter

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    So, my wife and I were debating the other day that when we are blessed with our children, would we would do if one of our children was homosexual.

    I do not believe homosexuality to be a choice. I do believe it to be a sexual orientation that someone is born with. Perhaps as one of the trials that the Lord sets up for us when we're born? However, I also do believe it to be against God and a sin in his eyes. So, I don't know... my stance on homosexuality is very confusing because homosexuality in itself and what causes it is so confusing. I wasn't born bisexual or gay in any form so I have NO clue what it's like. I do however know what it's like to be born not "normal" and what it's like to be shunned by a majority of society. It sucks.

    I'm definitely against Gay marriage but, only because they call it marriage and marriage should be between a man and a woman. Call it civil union or whatever and not a godly union such as Marriage and I'd sign the bill (if I was a member of congress).

    Anyway, back on topic. We both want to raise our children as Christians. So, this raises the problem. How do we keep them in the Christian faith when... they can't help or control their sexual feelings and a majority of Christians will judge them for being homosexual or in a homosexual relationship? Encourage them to practice celibacy? But, that feels wrong to deny them the right to be happy with someone. Because, I do believe that homosexual couples love each other and are happy.

    We don't want our children to hate or resent us or hate or resent God because they are different than everyone else and are experiencing thoughts and emotions that they cannot control. That's why a majority of homosexuals turn away from God in the first place. There has to be a way for homosexuals to live happy lives and be Christian at the same time.

    I mean, I can encourage them to be in a relationship with someone but, pray everyday for God to forgive them But, that goes against my own personal religious beliefs. Usually when I'm confronted with a sin I try to not keep doing it. If I encouraged my homosexual child to be happy in a homosexual relationship they wouldn't really be trying to stop the sin they're committing and how would that effect their souls or their Christian faith?

    I do not want to be one of those Christians who abandon homosexuals and I definitely wouldn't abandon my children for being homosexual or different in any way so, I'm not afraid of that and I do not think that abandoning your children because they're gay is not a good thing.

    I just... don't know. Why does this very topic have to be so controversial and confusing?
     
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  2. JoeP222w

    JoeP222w Well-Known Member

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    1 Corinthians 6:9-11 Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, (10) nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. (11) And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

    Anyone claiming to being Christian, then willfully, purposefully, habitually practicing and engaging in sin, no matter what that sin is, is simply not a Christian.

    If my child came to me and said that they were homosexual, I would explain to them, by the grace of God, that there is forgiveness in Jesus Christ for the one who repents of sin (including the sin of homosexuality, because God has clearly defined homosexuality to be sin) and trusts in Jesus Christ, has eternal life. But the one who remains dead in their sins against the holy, perfect and righteous and rejects the gift of grace that God offers in Jesus Christ, and dies in their sin will suffer His righteous wrath for eternity. And I would tell them that I don't want that for them. I want them to trust in the grace and mercy that God offers and for them to be saved from the depravity of their sin and to be made a new creation.

    --------------

    "I do not believe homosexuality to be a choice. I do believe it to be a sexual orientation that someone is born with."

    You won't find support of this in the Bible. Sin is always a choice. And God designed everyone to be heterosexual, not homosexual.

    ---------
    "I wasn't born bisexual or gay in any form so I have NO clue what it's like."

    Experience is not what defines morality. God defines morality and only Him. You may have not been "born" a murderer, but do you understand that murder is wrong? You may have not been "born" a rapist, but do you understand that rape is wrong?

    You don't have to experience something to know it is wrong. You look to the perfect standard: God.


    ----------
    "I do however know what it's like to be born not "normal" and what it's like to be shunned by a majority of society. It sucks."

    Feelings are not the basis of morality. A rapist may "feel" shunned, so because they feel shunned, does that make raping women ok? No, of course not. It is not wrong to feel shame when you are involved in something that is immoral as defined by God. It is the conscience, a gift from God, that feels shame when you sin. It is a warning system from God that you are not living in accordance with His will or His standards.

    -----------
    "I'm definitely against Gay marriage but, only because they call it marriage"

    It is not marriage, regardless if man thinks that they can call it marriage. It is sin. God has defined marriage to be the covenant between one man and one woman. Any other form is simply not marriage.

    -----------
    "Call it civil union or whatever and not a godly union such as Marriage and I'd sign the bill "

    So calling sin by some other name suddenly makes it righteous?

    -----------
    "How do we keep them in the Christian faith when... they can't help or control their sexual feelings"

    1. You can't keep them in the Christian faith because if they continue a habitual practice of sin, they never were in the Christian faith. Secondly, you don't persevere the saints, God does.

    2. Actually they can control their sexual feeling through repentance and faith in Jesus Christ. That is why they need the Savior.

    ------
    "Encourage them to practice celibacy?"

    Nothing in the Bible would support this thought. Try that with any other sin. A rapist or a murder is ok as long as they don't actually go out and rape or murder someone? No. An alcoholic is not ok to hang out at a bar as long as he does not have an alcoholic drink.

    God commands us to repent of our sin, not passively ignore it. He also commands us to be holy, and we do this through sanctification and keeping our focus on Christ Jesus. God also tells us to flee from sin, not see how close we can get to it without actually sinning.

    ----------

    "But, that feels wrong to deny them the right to be happy with someone."

    This is the lie from the homosexual community. No one is denying homosexuals happiness. Their definition of "happiness" is completely corrupt and dishonoring to their bodies and to God. And as rebel sinners, no one has the "right" to anything.

    "Because, I do believe that homosexual couples love each other and are happy."

    Then you have bought into the lies that homosexuality promotes. Very large number of homosexual relations have very high levels of abuse. And the majority of homosexuals have no desire whatsoever to make lifelong commitments to one another (less than 1%). There are very high counts of homosexuals with report of significant damage to their bodies due to the depravity of their sexual interaction and placing foreign object in the body that should never happen.

    -------
    "We don't want our children to hate or resent us or hate or resent God because they are different than everyone else and are experiencing thoughts and emotions that they cannot control. That's why a majority of homosexuals turn away from God in the first place."

    This is wrong. Homosexuals are homosexuals because they love their sin and hate God. It is not because someone challenged them in their sin.

    ---------
    "There has to be a way for homosexuals to live happy lives and be Christian at the same time."

    This is a very unbiblical thought. In many places Jesus warned sinners to "go and sin no more". He never told them to "go on sinning because your happiness is the most important thing".
    --------
    "I do not want to be one of those Christians who abandon homosexuals and I definitely wouldn't abandon my children for being homosexual or different in any way so, I'm not afraid of that and I do not think that abandoning your children because they're gay is not a good thing."

    If a person does this, this is not what God teaches us. By the grace of God, Christians do not hate homosexuals, nor abandon them. At the same time, Christians will not affirm someone in their sin (whether that sin is homosexuality, lust, murder, lying or any other sin) as righteous, but rather warn them to repent of their sins and trust in Jesus Christ. It is one of the most loving things a person can do, is to warn them of the coming righteous wrath of God and how their is forgiveness and life to be found only in Jesus Christ.
     
  3. SkyWriting

    SkyWriting The Librarian Supporter

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    If you are without sin, then you may judge what is a sin and what is not.
     
  4. kmrichard7

    kmrichard7 Well-Known Member

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    If any of my children are homosexual i would hope to handle it through prayer.
    My actions would be to of course love my child while letting them know the bible is specific in relation to homosexuality. That happiness does not rest in our spouse but in God alone, so happiness is attainable even if they spent their life alone.
    I would let them know that we all have our struggles and it is up to us to control them. I was born with addictive tendencies, it does not mean i have to be an addict.
    I would also let them know that while they may not be sexually attracted to someone of the opposite sex, we chose who we love and they are plenty capable of having a healthy and happy marriage with someone of the opposite sex, and that its a lie society has told us that love is not a choice. It is. We chose to love every day and we chose who we love.
    I would encourage my child to pray and seek God. To put their eyes on God first and all the little things will fall into place in time.
     
  5. SkyWriting

    SkyWriting The Librarian Supporter

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    It is both. So you must love your children, as well as your neighbors and not declare
    what is sinful for others. "Sin" is the direction you take, not what others do.
     
  6. SkyWriting

    SkyWriting The Librarian Supporter

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    Not good advice. Stop at the forgiveness for all sins part.
    We all will continue to sin till our last breath.
    Allow homosexuals the same life without additional
    judgment from peers and family.

    To die without sin in your life you only have to follow
    these simple guidelines for parents perfectly:

    15 See that no one repays another with evil for evil, but always seek after that which is good for one another and for all people.
    16 Rejoice always;
    17 pray without ceasing;
    18 in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
    19 Do not quench the Spirit;
    20 do not despise prophetic utterances.
    21 But examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good;
    22 abstain from every form of evil.
     
  7. JoeP222w

    JoeP222w Well-Known Member

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    God has clearly spoken what sin is and what it is not. And in John 8, God tell us to judge with a right judgment. I never said I was the sole source of defining that homosexuality is sin, God has spoken this, not me.

    Are you also not judging me? I never said I was without sin. Nor did I speak from self-righteousness. I am righteous only by the cross of Jesus Christ, by His grace alone.
     
  8. Hieronymus

    Hieronymus Well-Known Member

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    Not true.
    That's about judging people, not sin.
    We all know what sin is, what is sinful.
    But there's a difference between sins and sinners.
     
  9. JoeP222w

    JoeP222w Well-Known Member

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    You must not blame the sin of homosexuality (or murderer, or rapist or any other sinner) on Christians instead of the homosexual (sinner). In doing so, you are attempting to block the grace an mercy of God from working in the homosexual's (sinner's) life.



    Or that Christians are disallowing homosexuals from living their life by warning them of the danger of sin. This is a Straw Man fallacy.

    Don't misread me. Christians sin, and when they do, by the grace of God, they repent. They do not make a habitual, lifelong practice of sin.

    A homosexual denies that they are sinning, so the truth of God is not in them, and so they do not repent, and thus they do not have eternal life in Jesus Christ.
     
  10. JoeP222w

    JoeP222w Well-Known Member

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    Sin is what God defines as sin, not what the individual defines. In his natural state, man denies he does any sin at all.

    And the Bible says if you warn your brother of sin and he repents, then you have won your brother.
     
  11. Armoured

    Armoured So is America great again yet? Supporter

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    Why does it require you "do" anything? Continue to be a loving, caring parent.
     
  12. Hieronymus

    Hieronymus Well-Known Member

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    People are sexual, not to say horny..

    Now nobody decides what makes their hormones do stuff, it's what we discover in life.
    But sexuality is mainly something of the flesh, from which a Christian is supposed to turn away.
    Sex is for 2 people that love eachother, make a home together.

    But, God is rather clear that homosexuality is an abomination of the concept of marriage.
    But so is looking at people other than your partner with carnal desires.

    So personally, i don't think it is about what makes your hormones do stuff.
    Non the less, sodomy is rather disgusting for obvious reasons...

    Strange though how the 'rear' is an erogenous zone...

    Anyway, i think Christians make too big a deal of 'homosexual preferences'.
    I'm not so sure where to stand though.
     
  13. toLiJC

    toLiJC Senior Member

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    it is a kind of mental disorder like the schizophrenia, the psychoses, the autism, the anorexia, and the bulimia - it had even been stated as such in the diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders prior to 1973 year, and it is also caused by devilish spirits, so, it is not advisable for a human being to be homosexual, Jesus and His true disciples cast the devilish spirits out of the possessed/affected people completely and permanently, but unfortunately for the last years/decades there have been no enough true exorcists and priests to sanctify/purify/cleanse such people so effectively

    Blessings
     
    Last edited: Mar 23, 2016
  14. Tellastory

    Tellastory Hebrews 13:13

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    Those who profess Him and yet live in sin are still to be treated as His and because they are His, you are to correct or rebuke them by the scripture, brother. And if they do not look to Jesus for help to deliver them from that sin, and refuse to repent, then you need to withdraw from fellowship with that adult person until he does repent.

    Depends on the age; but let Jesus be your Good Shepherd.

    If there are other children & adults out there publicly that are influencing your child, you may need to reconsider sending him or her to a relative in another state or city or something. That's pretty much what one has to do when they find that their child is in a gang.

    However, if the child is just hitting you with this while very young, you need His discernment in finding out why the child is saying this.

    If the child is a girl and crying out "I am a boy", check to see if it is because she wants to play in sports with the other children but they will not let her play because she is a girl. It may be that kind of a situation which has nothing to do with sexual preference or sin.

    If the child is saying that he or she likes someone of the same sex, it may be that he or she is getting body impulses that are confusing them into thinking they are sexually attracted to the "friend". He or she may not have had those "impulses" before, but they may be experiencing them now because they are "thrilled" to see their friend.

    Do note that adrenaline junkies or people in high risks careers will get body signals that unless otherwise understood, is triggered by the drama or the thrill. Not that those in high risk careers are thrilled by life and death situation, or that adrenaline junkies are definitely sexually active, but sometimes our bodies send signals that has nothing to do with sex and yet someone may think suddenly, they are sexually attracted to that friend when they are really just thrilled to see them. Sometimes long absences or troubles at home can induce that environment in meeting their friend because it is like an escape from whatever is bothering them and so they see that friend more than just a friend but as a need instead.

    Then there is that sin factor where children being inundated with the pride of life, the sex appeal, and the need for acceptance by those around them in the media, toys, and fellows classmates, that the outward appearance becomes an idol to covet after, and thus they wind up worshiping the creature more than the Creator, in which case, God will give them up to a reprobate mind.

    So if a child says that because of what he or she is subjugated to, you may need to "help" by doing away with those things that feed it; be it the Barbie doll or the action figures, the magazines, the television, the internet, and the "friends" they hang around that are vocally gay and "nobody is going to change their minds" attitude and replace them with seeking Jesus and His righteousness first and better things.

    When I say "help", that means you can't have anything in the house that feeds that pride of life stuff as Jesus will be your Guide as to what needs to go or be "off" for the duration that your child is in "rehab" to conform the child not to the things of this world and to set the affections on the things above. You would have to do it too.

    That means be friends or be neighborly with people that are down to earth, everyday, and even poor people and not the glamorous type that catches people's eye or the popular or the rich or even the well to do.

    Stop judging other people by their outward appearance; stop preferring one over the other and treat them all equally. One may have to practice for a while with the poor or the common folk before getting back with the people you usually associate with that are of that ilk in your mind since we are to treat everybody the same way that we would want Christ to treat us.

    We live in a society that feeds the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eye, and the pride of life. That means that child you are trying to not conform to the way of this world will be watching YOU in what you do & say in how you treat & prefer over others, especially when it is done by the outward appearance. That includes the Swimsuit Edition of Sports Illustrated.

    But of course, we are not to have fellowship with sinners/believers that are refusing to repent for whatever the lie they want to believe about as supported by the world for that life of sin.

    By leading by example in relying on Jesus Christ as our Good Shepherd for all things, mayhap, the children will follow in that same foot step trusting Jesus will lead them away from temptation and deliver them from the evil one.

    Some will contend that they cannot help the way they feel, but Jesus can help them put them down, because they know they cam be so mad that they will want to kill someone, and yet they don't do it because they know it is wrong, and so in that same face, they need to acknowledge what the Bibles says is sin to call on Jesus for help to put that feeling down where His love quenches the fiery darts of the devil since lust can never be love since true love seeks the good of the other in the eyes of God.

    1 John 3:3 And every man that hath this hope in him purifieth himself, even as he is pure....8 He that committeth sin is of the devil; for the devil sinneth from the beginning. For this purpose the Son of God was manifested, that he might destroy the works of the devil.

    2 Timothy 4:18 And the Lord shall deliver me from every evil work, and will preserve me unto his heavenly kingdom: to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen.
     
  15. katerinah1947

    katerinah1947 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Hi,

    There are homosexual Christians out there.

    I bump into them online all of the time.

    And what I learn from them, is actually quite nice.

    When talking to a homosexual Christisn, really you can just listen in.

    Those people have a death sentence for eternity, given to them, by lots of Christians.

    As they have worked out their Condemnation, from Christianity, many have accepted their fate.

    I am transgendered and accepted, not my fate, but the battle before me, and lost.

    Never have I lost a battle. Gays, have lost their battle, the one given to them by Christians.

    They too though, while fighting that battle, to not be homosexual, studied the laws of God that are against them.

    After all, if you were going to be killed, would you not at some point want to understand what the judgement was.

    Well, enough LGB, have looked into how much trouble they were in.

    And they looked. And they looked. And they kept looking.

    When online I bump into them, they say the strangest human possible words to me on their Christian death sentence for eternity.

    They say they can find no actual condemnation of themselves. And it seems that confuses each of them.

    It seems they are saying, that when they sometimes become scholars of merit Biblically, that scholarship does not support the present understandings of God on the homosexuals.

    It supports bad scholarship.

    It is still not fun for them, the Christian death sentence given to them.

    It seems they are saying, that no matter what is True Biblically, like in 1616, when Galileo was forced to accept the Christian Condemnation of his scholarship, they are still forced to accept the Condemnation by Christianity of their scholarship.

    LOVE,
     
  16. JoeP222w

    JoeP222w Well-Known Member

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    If they continue in a habitual unrepentant practice of sin, they are demonstrating that they are not His.
     
  17. football5680

    football5680 Well-Known Member

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    That's not how it works. The Bible tells us what is sinful so the truth is objective. You are not passing judgement when you simply recognize that something is sinful.
     
  18. JoeP222w

    JoeP222w Well-Known Member

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    That is not what the Bible says.


    2 Corinthians 5:17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.

    1 Corinthians 6:9-11 Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, (10) nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. (11) And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
     
  19. katerinah1947

    katerinah1947 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Hi,

    I think their point is illustrated here, on thou shall not kill, as stated in KJV.

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thou_shalt_not_kill

    If I read KJV, and follow that, criminals have a free hand with my family, for I am not allowed to kill those killers.

    But, is do not kill what God really meant? If it is we follow.

    Let ISIS, gave their way then and kill us all off.

    Those homosexual Christians say that when they have tried to understand, why they are going to go to hell, and be put there by God, the Bible meaning for homosexual is not a do not kill type of definition, rather it is suffering from the same issues, (word choices to convey meaning), that do not kill has.

    LOVE,
     
  20. katerinah1947

    katerinah1947 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Hi,

    What definition of the word homosexuality as it appears in 1 Corinthians 6:9, is being used there?

    LOVE,
     
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