What is the meaning behind "you never" and "you always"?

[Lanae]

I read articles about words to avoid like "never" or "always" because my crazy cousin said that I never supported his music and art gallery. He shouldve been patient and waited instead he cussed me out and blocked me on facebook. Maybe I don't need to and will never support his music and art gallery then. He got mad at me over burrow money from him through Western Union. What's the meaning behind "you never" and "you always"?

 

[“Paisios”]

I read articles about words to avoid like "never" or "always" because my crazy cousin said that I never supported his music and art gallery. He shouldve been patient and waited instead he cussed me out and blocked me on facebook. Maybe I don't need to and will never support his music and art gallery then. He got mad at me over burrow money from him through Western Union. What's the meaning behind "you never" and "you always"?

I have heard it said that we should avoid “always” and “never” because they have a finality to them that implies our future responses as well as our present ones, and we are often subject to changing our minds.

It sounds like your cousin is hurt because he feels that you have not been supportive of his music and art gallery. Perhaps that is only his perception, or perhaps you have had good reason not to support his work, but it sounds like he is using the term “never” for emphasis to show his displeasure for what he feels to be your lack of support.

 

[rockytopva]

"Wherein they think it strange that ye run not with them to the same excess of riot, speaking evil of you:" - 1 Peter 4:4

And as the African American preacher puts it.... "The bible says they will think it strange that you don't run with them... But that's all right! If I've got to walk alone I will walk alone! For God I live! And for God I die!"

 

[Ken Rank]

I read articles about words to avoid like "never" or "always" because my crazy cousin said that I never supported his music and art gallery. He shouldve been patient and waited instead he cussed me out and blocked me on facebook. Maybe I don't need to and will never support his music and art gallery then. He got mad at me over burrow money from him through Western Union. What's the meaning behind "you never" and "you always"?

When people are hurt (and his pain came from selfishness, expecting you to make him feel the way he desires) they say things that rarely are 100% accurate. Do you "always" not support him? No... you have given him money, haven't you? Therefore you HAVE supported him but because, in his eyes, you are not now... he used a word that isn't accurate. He does sound selfish, and honestly... the best thing you can do right now is stay blocked and avoid him. Not forever, just long enough for him to come to his senses and reach a point where he can talk. If he never gets THERE... then you really are better off without him because this type of episode will only repeat over and over again. But, should he calm down and come to his senses, then perhaps you can point out the good you have done for him over the years. Just stop allowing him to bully you.

 

[brinny]

I read articles about words to avoid like "never" or "always" because my crazy cousin said that I never supported his music and art gallery. He shouldve been patient and waited instead he cussed me out and blocked me on facebook. Maybe I don't need to and will never support his music and art gallery then. He got mad at me over burrow money from him through Western Union. What's the meaning behind "you never" and "you always"?

Did you borrow money from him via Western Union, or did he borrow money from you?

 

[Lanae]

Did you borrow money from him via Western Union, or did he borrow money from you?

I asked him can he send it to me via western union but he never sent me any money and told me that's foolish

 

[Sketcher]

Those are two phrases you should never use in any relationship that you value.

 

[sunshineforJesus]

Saying you never,and you always in a negative tone is something people are prone
to saying when upset,and they don't really mean it. When people are upset they often greatly exaggerate things.

 

[brinny]

I asked him can he send it to me via western union but he never sent me any money and told me that's foolish

Why should he send you money, especially if he has clearly indicated to you that he wants nothing to do with you?

You're describing what sounds like you harassing him.

 

[Greg J.]

In Scripture, God uses the words "always" and "never" the way most of us normally use it. It doesn't mean 100% of the time or 0% of the time. It is a word choice to express a spirit or a feeling (that can change). When we are trying to say 100.000% of the time, instead of saying "always" we will sometimes choose another way of saying it, because simply using the word is ambiguous. That's just how it is because we are not trying to convey some mathematical fact, we are trying to communicate with someone.

However, it is wise to not use "always" and "never" unless you DO mean 100.000% or 0.000% of the time, otherwise how people understand you will become looser, and like the boy who cried wolf, when you do actually mean 100.000% of the time, they will not receive your word as meaning that.

 

[turkle]

I am confused over what borrowing money from him has to do with supporting his gallery.

I sense that there is a lot more to this story. If we were to ask him why he is upset, what do you think he would say?

 

[Lanae]

Why should he send you money, especially if he has clearly indicated to you that he wants nothing to do with you?

You're describing what sounds like you harassing him.

Hey sorry for the delay. I wasnt harassing him. I was being nice about it. I was having a hard time commuting back and forth to school and didnt have enough money to get lunch

 

[Lanae]

I am confused over what borrowing money from him has to do with supporting his gallery.

I sense that there is a lot more to this story. If we were to ask him why he is upset, what do you think he would say?

Idk what hes gonna say. He may not say anything

 

[brinny]

Hey sorry for the delay. I wasnt harassing him. I was being nice about it. I was having a hard time commuting back and forth to school and didnt have enough money to get lunch

Thanks for sharing that Lanae. I can understand the need to ask, under the circumstances. What i'm sensing is that God may be tryin' to tell you something Lanae, and that is that only HE really can meet your needs and not friends or even family. Praying for you that God shows you that He is able to meet all of your needs.

Are things better, Lanae?

 

[Lanae]

Thanks for sharing that Lanae. I can understand the need to ask, under the circumstances. What i'm sensing is that God may be tryin' to tell you something Lanae, and that is that only HE really can meet your needs and not friends or even family. Praying for you that God shows you that He is able to meet all of your needs.

Are things better, Lanae?

Yes

 

[brinny]

Yes

That's good to hear.

Are there ways that you can find to help others, like helping out in a soup kitchen or somewhere where people would appreciate a friendly and helpful smile as you serve them their lunch, etc?

It would not only bless them, but it would bless you too.

Think and pray about it, ok?

 

[Lanae]

That's good to hear.

Are they ways that you can find to help others, like helping out in a soup kitchen or somewhere where people would appreciate a friendly and helpful smile as you serve them their lunch, etc?

It would not only bless them, but it would bless you too.

Think and pray about it, ok?

Ok

 

[brinny]

Ok

Praying for you Lanae. God has GOOD plans for you. TRUST Him. (((hug)))

 

[drjean]

Those are part of a dialogue that means the speaker is irrationally invalidating you. Anytime you hear the "shoulds coulds woulds" and "nevers, always" you can identify that invalidation (including the post that says, I hope in jest," those are two phrases you should never use") . Unfortunately some phrases have become a part of our own dialogues and we might do well to listen to ourselves. \\

There is only One Who could truly mean "always" or "never"...