Marriage is a partnership between a man and a woman (or man-man or woman-woman). Each has their role to fulfill but it must be based on mutual love and respect for the other person. Our best model is the church, the bride of Christ.
Ephesians 5:21-28, "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.
Notice that there is no place here for domination, especially any form of anger, abuse, etc.
In general, because Christ loved us and sacrificed Himself so that we may have eternal life, we should put our own interests as second to that of our spouse.
Take it from me! I have been married for 51 years and I still love my wife as much (perhaps more) than when we met. Men should be strong enough to take care of ourselves and have plenty left over to take care of our wife, children, and parents -- and for others in general.
Do NOT let others hammer you with out-of-context Bible quotes that argue that men are to control women in the sense of ruling over them. Marriage is a partnership. Have a look at how Joseph cared for Mary...
Matthew 2:18-24, "This is how the birth of Jesus the Messiah came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit. Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.
But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.”
All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: “The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel” (which means “God with us”).
When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife."
Clearly Joseph had reason to suspect that Mary had been unfaithful and could have publicly shamed her, but acted in accordance with God's will and became the acting father of our Lord Jesus Christ.
