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What are the chances?

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DLX

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We have one daughter that is Autistic and the other two are fine. What are the chances that we would have another Autistic child? We would really like one more child. But we want to be careful. We have talked about adoption. So I know there are other options and my heart won't be broken if we shouldn't have another baby or our own.

Lexi
 

kayd1966

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I have no idea what the chances are...we talked about having another child but decided against it...one of the reasons was the possibility of autism. They are finding that autism is genetic but they are still in the very early stages of really finding what is going on with this.

Do you or your husband's family history show autism? I didn't find out that there was a history in my husband's family till after James was born and I started looking into it. I found that my husband and all his male cousins didn't talk till they were 4 years old or older...!!!! BUT no one felt that was important to tell me until I started freaking that James wasn't talking yet...check your historys but either way...God is still over all...and my little man is such a blessing, I can't imagine life without him.
 
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DLX

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Hey sister,

Well there is one second or third cousin of mine with Autism living in Scotland right now. He is a teenager I think. Other than that, nothing. I was just diagnosed with bipolar and there is no history of that in the family either. It is so frustrating. But you are right, God is good and I am so happy to have Quinlan here with us. She is a fighter. I guess her biggest problbem is her language. She is very delayed (at a 2 year level - she is physically 6 years old) and it is also quite disordered as well. She has come a long way in the past little while though.

How old is your son? What did you get him for Christmas? Quinlan doesn't play very much. But we got the girls the talking Dora house. Her sisters are big Dora fans.

I guess for a while there, we weren't willing to accept Quinlan's diagnoses. So we just kept on having kids and we are so lucky that the other two are okay! We thought for a while there that Quinlan's problems were related to hearing. But it doesn't seem so now.

She is at a really good school. They have been such a blessing to us. At first, the change in routine was too much for her to handle. She would have tantrums and they would send her to the time out room, where she would take off her clothes and pee on the floor. I was so embarrassed. But they were so understanding and just said "No big deal, we just clean it up." They pick her up in the morning by bus, right at the door, and have her stay for lunch and then they drop her off again. What an amazing load off.

She is just 5 years old and in Kindergarten right now. She is coming along with her alphabet and printing. Some other areas need work. Her fine motor skills are weak. But she feels like she is succeeding and that is great. She is happy to go to school.

Wow, talking your ear off here. You are welcome to PM me if you want or we can chat here. Thanks for responding. I really appreciate it. And thanks for praying for my friend.

Bless you this Christmas.

Lexi
 
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kayd1966

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Hey
James is 4 1/2, he was diagnosed at 2 1/2 but I actually noticed when he was 18 months.

I did the hearing tests and the playgroup assessments then hired a speech therapist to work with him while we were waiting for him to start speech with the health unit.

He went for two more assessments and started going to school every morning (M-F) at the early intervention program when he was 3. He started school (Sept 2004) communicating with 8 words, boardmaker cards and sign language. By November 2004, we had put away the cards and were using speech and sign. I hired an aide to work with him at home in January 2005 and she began working on speech, behavior and transitions with him.

He is still at the same school but is 100% speech now, and is at a 3-4 year old level in communication. His aide still comes every afternoon, and I've added a speech therapist and behavior therapist to my staff. They oversee his home program and I coordinate with the school so that we are all aiming towards the same goals.

He knows all his letters and can count to 100, he's also doing simple math. We started teaching him to read last month because our behavior therapist believes it will help his speech. James is a visual learner, so he has been communicating using the words for things he can see...for example: "James drink juice cup" .... this actually means "Can I have a drink of juice in my cup" but because he can't put an object with all those filler words, we get very basic language. Since he's started reading, we are hearing better language skills because he has a visual reference for the filler words.

Academically, his teachers feel he is ready for grade 1 but his language is holding him back. He has friends this year and is role playing and pretend playing with his sister. She never lets up on him, he has two choices with her...play with her or ignore her and be bugged to death. She is actually his best therapist.

Ok...now I've talked your ears off...sorry
You have a wonderful Christmas too.
 
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goldenviolet

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uniquetadpole

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Having Autism is not the worst thing in the world. But if your fear of having another child would change your love for that child if it were to have Autism then adoption would be my suggestion. But I see you had two children younger than your one with Autism...so the Chances are possibly less than 1/3...

I have AS and yes it has been difficult...and the only thing I would even consider changing is an earlier diagnosis...not being without it. It has made me who I am and I actually like who I am...it is the rest of the world that needs to open their eyes to what they are missing. Anyway...back to your question...I am not sure of the chances...but you are right in acknowledging the hereditary factor...but keep in mind those aren't the only factors.

I will keep you and your family in my prayers!!!

hugs,
Tad
 
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Entertaining_Angels

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Originally we were worried too but then we remembered how wonderfully special our son is and how he is just the joy of our lives and that didn't seem quite as important. Our daughter is not autistic but I do wonder if she has sensory issues. Where my son is hyposensitive (pretty severely), our daughter is hypersenstive and the complete opposite of our son.

Just pray. We both really felt it was time to have another child and if you are to have another child and are in prayer over the issue, I believe you'll know. Trust God. He's knitting these babies together and has a good reason they are as they are.

And, although there have been no studies done, avoid u/s's whenever possible. I have a pretty strong hunch they had alot to do with my son's issues.

God bless.
 
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