What are some ways to avoid gossip?

[Take Heart]

In what ways have YOU avoided gossip in the past? I know we slip and give in to gossip from time to time whether it's gossiping about others or listening & responding to it

Gossip is huge. It's everywhere. It's potentially easier to avoid gossip when in a crowd because you aren't being directly spoken to. But what if it's just one-on-one. How do you avoid gossip?

Sometimes I say things like:
"oh well, what can you do?"
or
"I'm sure they had a reason for feeling/saying/thinking/behaving in such a way "[which is *understandably* met with a negative response in which I am deemed as someone who can't empathize with them]. See, I like to think about both sides of the story. Mentally, I can understand why the person is feeling the way they feel towards another. And visa versa. But offering your view of opening their perspective on the other person's viewpoint can be seen as negative.

Empathy is important.

Anyway, how do YOU deal with/avoid gossip especially when it's just you and 1 other person?

 

[rockytopva]

Where no wood is, there the fire goeth out: so where there is no talebearer, the strife ceaseth. - Proverbs 26:20

Don't provide them any wood or kindling! Become so smart you won't even talk to people like that. Pause, give them a strange look, and keep on going!

 

[( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)]

I think some ways to avoid gossip would be to stay away from gossipers.
I also want to say that I'm very proud to be able to make complete sentences. When I was in elementary school I just could not grasp the concept of it.

 

[Bluerose31]

In what ways have YOU avoided gossip in the past? I know we slip and give in to gossip from time to time whether it's gossiping about others or listening & responding to it

Gossip is huge. It's everywhere. It's potentially easier to avoid gossip when in a crowd because you aren't being directly spoken to. But what if it's just one-on-one. How do you avoid gossip?

Sometimes I say things like:
"oh well, what can you do?"
or
"I'm sure they had a reason for feeling/saying/thinking/behaving in such a way "[which is *understandably* met with a negative response in which I am deemed as someone who can't empathize with them]. See, I like to think about both sides of the story. Mentally, I can understand why the person is feeling the way they feel towards another. And visa versa. But offering your view of opening their perspective on the other person's viewpoint can be seen as negative.

Empathy is important.

Anyway, how do YOU deal with/avoid gossip especially when it's just you and 1 other person?

I just say, "Maybe we shouldn't talk about this," and hope the person stops talking about the gossip.

 

[ImAllLikeOkWaitWat]

I usually say oh is that right? Oh wow. Oh okay really? No way! This way I let them feel like their feelings are validated while at the same time not adding to the drama.

 

[redblue22]

I usually just say that I can't tell them. I explain that if I tell them then they will think I'm telling their stuff too. So, in order to keep their trust I have to be trustworthy with others. Make sense?

 

[Cearbhall]

"Gossip" has always seemed like a strange concept to me. Also, the idea that it's always wrong to "talk behind someone's back." No, it's not always wrong. Sometimes it's malicious, yes, but sometimes it's necessary or at least serves a good purpose. The focus should be on the intention, rather than the act itself.

 

[Grandpa2390]

We have to define what gossip is.

But until it is defined, I will go with the clearest example of gossip "did you hear what betty and timmy did last night????" and what happened between betty and timmy last night has absolutely nothing to do with me. no impact whatsoever. (I'm not their parents or pastor. If I were... I'm not sure. I guess then the question of how reliable the source is would factor into whether it is gossip? What exactly is gossip?)

If someone comes up to me and attempts to gossip. My reaction is: "what does that have to do with me? Why do I care?" I'm pretty blunt. especially with gossip. And if the person is persistent, I go on the offensive. "How do you know this? You are going around telling people these awful things, slandering a person's name. How do you know it is true. and even if it is, what right do you have to have to share it?"

my reaction is gauged on whether I think what is being shared is gossip. Gossip, in the technical sense, is hard to define.
because gossip to me may not be to someone else. and even if it were information that should be share with someone else (like a pastor) it may still be gossip depending on the attitude...