What a waste...

[Loser82070]

I'm 47. I'm also worthless, stupid, and never going to amount to anything. I don't have any talent or ability and I'm no good to or for anyone. I have 3 kids, each with different moms, who fortunately didn't have to grow up with me in their home. Their mothers did the right thing and got them away from me. My kids like me, but I can't understand why. My wife was so mistreated by her exes that she finds me an acceptable catch. I hate myself more then words can express. I'm not going to heaven when I die, Jesus certainly didn't sacrifice himself for a worthless turd like me. I'm a failure of the highest order. I'm living proof that you shouldn't have to commit a crime to belong in prison. I can't do anything. Why I was ever created is beyond anyone's explanation. I wish I'd never been born or at least my mother should have aborted me. I was made to suffer and then burn in hell for eternity. I wonder what I did to deserve this?

 

[NurseAbigail]

You have the rest of your life to live, you cannot change the past, but you can certainly change the future. You have 3 kids, and they are a blessing, they came from you. Had you not existed they wouldn't be here. Jesus sacrificed himself for you, in your worst state, in your most sinful state. That's why there is no excuse for you to say that you will burn in hell, because your sins are paid for already, all you have to do is accept what Christ has done and allow Him to change you. You have all eternity awaiting for you, chose life and live it well. Love your wife and kids with all your might, and just accept the love that God has for you, He knew all the shortcomings, mishaps, mistakes...and He is telling you that what once was red as scarlet, He can turn white as wool.

 

[razzelflabben]

I'm 47. I'm also worthless, stupid, and never going to amount to anything. I don't have any talent or ability and I'm no good to or for anyone. I have 3 kids, each with different moms, who fortunately didn't have to grow up with me in their home. Their mothers did the right thing and got them away from me. My kids like me, but I can't understand why. My wife was so mistreated by her exes that she finds me an acceptable catch. I hate myself more then words can express. I'm not going to heaven when I die, Jesus certainly didn't sacrifice himself for a worthless turd like me. I'm a failure of the highest order. I'm living proof that you shouldn't have to commit a crime to belong in prison. I can't do anything. Why I was ever created is beyond anyone's explanation. I wish I'd never been born or at least my mother should have aborted me. I was made to suffer and then burn in hell for eternity. I wonder what I did to deserve this?

You are depressed and some of your words remind me not only of the lies I was told all my life but the depression that Job spoke of when he had lost everything.

There is absolutely nothing anyone can say to you to change the thoughts that are in your head and heart. I will tell you this from experience however, the thoughts you are having are deceptions of Satan. IOW's you are believing the lies of Satan that are intended to lead you to your eternal death. The only way to overcome those lies are thought renewing your heart and mind in Christ Jesus which seems impossible to you especially with the lies you are believing. What you need to do is distinguish truth from lie and hold only to the truth.

To that end, let me challenge you. 1. Read and study scripture...doesn't matter if you understand it or not, doesn't matter if you believe it or not, just read and study it anyway. 2. Listen to good uplifting Christian music. IOW's feed the positive, the things you are reading in scripture. and 3. seek after God and the transformation He wants to make in your life. One of the truths you are not hearing is that you were created in the image of God. That image has been marred at least in your eyes beyond recognition but God wants to restore that image so that everyone even you can see the God in you. Seek God's working that will restore that image that the sins of the flesh have removed, clouded over, hide from view.

That is a great start...you may never understand your true value but you can gain a hint of who you are created to be in Christ. Take the time to find that guy rather than allow Satan to win the battle of your heart and mind.

 

[Halbhh]

I'm 47. I'm also worthless, stupid, and never going to amount to anything. I don't have any talent or ability and I'm no good to or for anyone. I have 3 kids, each with different moms, who fortunately didn't have to grow up with me in their home. Their mothers did the right thing and got them away from me. My kids like me, but I can't understand why. My wife was so mistreated by her exes that she finds me an acceptable catch. I hate myself more then words can express. I'm not going to heaven when I die, Jesus certainly didn't sacrifice himself for a worthless turd like me. I'm a failure of the highest order. I'm living proof that you shouldn't have to commit a crime to belong in prison. I can't do anything. Why I was ever created is beyond anyone's explanation. I wish I'd never been born or at least my mother should have aborted me. I was made to suffer and then burn in hell for eternity. I wonder what I did to deserve this?

But none are much better, really, not in the ultimate sense -- all have sinned, all have fallen short. Not close but short, more like way short!

Something we just read yesterday in our study group comes to mind!
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No One Is Righteous

9What shall we conclude then? Do we have any advantage? Not at all! For we have already made the charge that Jews and Gentiles alike are all under the power of sin. 10As it is written:

“There is no one righteous, not even one;
11there is no one who understands;
there is no one who seeks God.

12All have turned away,
they have together become worthless;
there is no one who does good,
not even one.”b

13“Their throats are open graves;
their tongues practice deceit.”c
“The poison of vipers is on their lips.”d

14“Their mouths are full of cursing and bitterness.”e

15“Their feet are swift to shed blood;
16ruin and misery mark their ways,
17and the way of peace they do not know.”f

18“There is no fear of God before their eyes.”g

19 Now we know that whatever the law says, it says to those who are under the law, so that every mouth may be silenced and the whole world held accountable to God. 20 Therefore no one will be declared righteous in God’s sight by the works of the law; rather, through the law we become conscious of our sin.

Righteousness Through Faith

21 But now apart from the law the righteousness of God has been made known, to which the Law and the Prophets testify. 22 This righteousness is given through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference between Jew and Gentile, 23for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, 24and all are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus. "
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There is One Who can save even you and even me!

He said --

"I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance."

He, He, actually came here for you, and for me!

 

[drjean]

I know well the dark place in which you are dwelling right now.
Don't.
The dark spiral is fed by the lies the devil is making you think (and post) and the first thing is to stop thinking them... whether you have to sit and play computer games 12 hours a day or focus upon helping others or whatever it is to stop that bad habit, do it (not drink, or gamble or other forms of misbehavior though).

IF you find your way to thanking God regardless of "where"you are and "how" you feel, praise His name regardless of thinking He doesn't care or want to hear from you, that will help greatly. (Truly this is faith when we can eek out such worship in our dungeon days. It's easy to praise Him when things are good, you know?)

You are strong because you are still here. You are still here because God has a future for you...and He's patiently waiting for you.

Depression tells us lies. You are in such a dark place that you know you wouldn't normally make any major decisions when you aren't thinking clearly... so for now, work at changing your mind set.

You haven't always been this depressed and you won't be in the future. You were born perfect I'll have you know and your mother loved you because she DID have you and not abort you!

One step at a time. Look up. Even in the deepest well in the middle of the day if one looks up they can see the stars!

 

[Ken Rank]

I'm 47. I'm also worthless, stupid, and never going to amount to anything. I don't have any talent or ability and I'm no good to or for anyone. I have 3 kids, each with different moms, who fortunately didn't have to grow up with me in their home. Their mothers did the right thing and got them away from me. My kids like me, but I can't understand why. My wife was so mistreated by her exes that she finds me an acceptable catch. I hate myself more then words can express. I'm not going to heaven when I die, Jesus certainly didn't sacrifice himself for a worthless turd like me. I'm a failure of the highest order. I'm living proof that you shouldn't have to commit a crime to belong in prison. I can't do anything. Why I was ever created is beyond anyone's explanation. I wish I'd never been born or at least my mother should have aborted me. I was made to suffer and then burn in hell for eternity. I wonder what I did to deserve this?

I would rather be blunt here than to sugarcoat this. Assuming you have been a turd for 47 years (I doubt that) and you see wasted potential and time, the cure comes first by recognizing where you failed. Once you recognize that, you can move forward. Call me crazy, champ, but I see potential and value in your words. You can take your mistakes and failures and share them in order to edify and build up those around you and beyond. Look... I am 51 and still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. At 5' 11" I have been upwards to 265 pounds as recently as July 1st. My testosterone levels were well under 200, I was a mess. But... I can continue to feel sorry for myself and get worse and die young... or I can determine to walk out God's purpose for me in my life. And so... I have already lost 55 pounds and added 260 points to my testosterone not to mention removed the need for blood pressure pills and more. Yes.. I am talking about my health and you are talking about your entire life... but the fixes are similar. We either stand up and make the necessary changes, or remain seated and die having allowed our emotions (and maybe some outside spiritual influences) to win. Don't let anything but you win this one.

 

[SkyWriting]

I'm 47. I'm also worthless, stupid, and never going to amount to anything. I don't have any talent or ability and I'm no good to or for anyone.

You can start being helpful and a blessing to your family and others.
Nobody on this forum can do that for you.

 

[Loser82070]

You can start being helpful and a blessing to your family and others.
Nobody on this forum can do that for you.

I AM helpful to my family, but the nature of what I am prevents me from being a blessing. If I am a part of your life, you are cursed. You will suffer pain and ruin as long as I am involved in it. That's just who I am and what I do. I don't mean it to happen... it just does.

 

[SkyWriting]

I AM helpful to my family, but the nature of what I am prevents me from being a blessing. If I am a part of your life, you are cursed. You will suffer pain and ruin as long as I am involved in it. That's just who I am and what I do. I don't mean it to happen... it just does.

I have a son like that. You might be related to me.
That is just part of life. We all have to deal with the cards we are dealt.

 

[razzelflabben]

I AM helpful to my family, but the nature of what I am prevents me from being a blessing. If I am a part of your life, you are cursed. You will suffer pain and ruin as long as I am involved in it. That's just who I am and what I do. I don't mean it to happen... it just does.

My husband has had to teach me perspective...where I feel like I bring only harm, he sees the good I bring and loves me anyway. It is an impossibly difficult feeling to think and believe that we only bring harm to others but this too is a lie from Satan. You are not bringing the harm...often times Satan uses us and the surroundings around us to harm others or make us feel like we are doing the harm when in fact it is circumstances. I was told my entire life that everything was my fault...that doesn't mean it is. It means that I was blamed for things that were not mine to bare. In cases like that it is important to know what is yours to deal with and allow God to correct you in those. The others are not yours to bare no matter who tells you to bare them. Hard lesson to learn but important one none the less

 

[hopesum]

I'm 47. I'm also worthless, stupid, and never going to amount to anything. I don't have any talent or ability and I'm no good to or for anyone. I have 3 kids, each with different moms, who fortunately didn't have to grow up with me in their home. Their mothers did the right thing and got them away from me. My kids like me, but I can't understand why. My wife was so mistreated by her exes that she finds me an acceptable catch. I hate myself more then words can express. I'm not going to heaven when I die, Jesus certainly didn't sacrifice himself for a worthless turd like me. I'm a failure of the highest order. I'm living proof that you shouldn't have to commit a crime to belong in prison. I can't do anything. Why I was ever created is beyond anyone's explanation. I wish I'd never been born or at least my mother should have aborted me. I was made to suffer and then burn in hell for eternity. I wonder what I did to deserve this?

Wow, you have all the bases covered. You are definitely Low.
But seriously, I understand it's medical, emotional, historic, and epic.
Not sure any one response here will be a turn around.

It can also be spiritual, which is why treating it just naturally isn't a whole solution.
'Solution' right now might be a far fetch tho. I think you might settle for just some peace.

I have said all those things to myself. I've been in an abyss. Swallowed up by depths of disappointment, hopelessness, and lack of purpose (the most painful for me). I think the only thing that helped was actually having a shred of belief left that God is beyond my 'feelings' and is really real, and really cares... somehow. I cried out. Many times. I'm sure He helped me to put one foot in front of the other. (Still does)

While my emotions where taking over I did have the knowledge that there is REAL POWER in God's Word. The thing is, I couldn't bring myself to care. When you're that low it just doesn't matter. The emotions speak louder. They SEEM more real. So when I couldn't bring myself to reach for God's Word I reached inside my own self-talk. I realized (through asking God for help) that I was MEDITATING on the thoughts that were keeping me under water!

I caught myself repeating the put-downs to myself. That's what mediation is. Turning the same thought over and over in the mind. I thought, "I may not want to read God's word right now, but at least I shouldn't be helping the doom!" So I asked the Holy Spirit to help me catch myself. He did, and still does.

I will pray for you this week! Don't give up.

"As I think in my heart, so am I." —Proverbs 23:7

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[christianforumsuser]

I'm 47. I'm also worthless, stupid, and never going to amount to anything. I don't have any talent or ability and I'm no good to or for anyone. I have 3 kids, each with different moms, who fortunately didn't have to grow up with me in their home. Their mothers did the right thing and got them away from me. My kids like me, but I can't understand why. My wife was so mistreated by her exes that she finds me an acceptable catch. I hate myself more then words can express. I'm not going to heaven when I die, Jesus certainly didn't sacrifice himself for a worthless turd like me. I'm a failure of the highest order. I'm living proof that you shouldn't have to commit a crime to belong in prison. I can't do anything. Why I was ever created is beyond anyone's explanation. I wish I'd never been born or at least my mother should have aborted me. I was made to suffer and then burn in hell for eternity. I wonder what I did to deserve this?

You're calling God a liar.
To be clear I'm not saying you're right.
Do you want what God promised in the Bible or do you want to be a person who's told his nature is good and be promised worldly supports by soothsayers?

 

[Ruien]

Dude, your kids like you. You said so yourself. Children need a father, and they *want* a father. They want a dad who loves them and wants to be around them. They need a dad who protects them and teaches them. If you've been a miserable failure--I sympathize. I have some things in common with you. Here's what we do: 1. Start living for the future, not the past. We can't change the past. 2. Love our kids. Want the best for them. 3. Be honest with our kids. Tell them the truth. This requires change, because we can't love our kids and be honest with them while continuing to do the things that make us miserable.

We can be honest about our failures and admit that we're trying, and take our kids on our journeys together. Kids don't need their dads to be perfect. They just need their dads. And go to church together. That is part of the journey and it helps immensely. Find a church that you find meaningful.