VERY troubling book brought home by my son

2PhiloVoid

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As long as my son is in my house I will mind the things he watches and reads! All I am trying to do is help my son find and keep salvation and I feel like the whole world is trying to do the opposite...

My heart is with you there. My own son this past year shared with me that he was having doubts about the Christian faith, and so I asked him if these were his own thoughts he was having about it or if they were ideas he took from some other source (like a book or a youtube video).

The difference here between us is that I am not really experiencing any behavioral problems with my son. You mentioned that your son has expressed some form of 'rebellion' for a while. In that case, I'd do more than just leave it up to the pastor. I'd check on getting your son to a Christian psychologist who can work with your son in a professional manner and who takes into account both the value of the Bible as well as some scientific understanding of the human mind.

You might want to consider that your son could have either some emotional issues or even a chemical imbalance. A professional should be able to clarify if either is the case ...
 
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ViaCrucis

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As long as my son is in my house I will mind the things he watches and reads! All I am trying to do is help my son find and keep salvation and I feel like the whole world is trying to do the opposite...

You're not going to like hearing this, but your son's salvation isn't your job. Your job is to be a loving parent.

Have enough faith in God that you can entrust your child to Him. This kind of behavior you describe yourself doing is causing more harm than good. You are only going to alienate your child, and push them from the faith.

You can't make someone believe. That's just not something anyone can do. And heavy-handed manipulation and controlling behavior won't do anything except damage the relationship you have with him.

-CryptoLutheran
 
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NerdGirl

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I am wondering if the OP didn't just make this up since they dropped a bomb and have not been back to comment...

The replies have been a bit one-sided, so I wouldn't be shocked if she feels a little...ganged up on. But that's the risk you take, posting for advice online!
 
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kvolm

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Sorry to read that you are so disturbed by this. Like most parents who are Christ-followers, I imagine you want what you feel is in his best interest, which would be to love and worship God. But everyone has to come to that decision of their own free will. So having honest conversations with your son to understand what he learned from this book and what he saw as interesting or valuable or relevant to his life and spiritual development might be a helpful approach. God continually forgives each of us when we are rebellious, confused, searching, apathetic, etc, so extending the same to your son could help him grasp the fullness of who Christ is.
 
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Larniavc

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As long as my son is in my house I will mind the things he watches and reads! All I am trying to do is help my son find and keep salvation and I feel like the whole world is trying to do the opposite...
The reality of the situation is that if you do drive him from you (by your behaviour) you will also drive him from Jesus.

Why not let him find his own way and let him know that you love him and will always be waiting for him to accept Jesus if/when he needs you to?

That way he knows that you are full of the kind of love he needs from you (not the love you think he needs from you) for him and he will be monumentally more open you your faith than if you throw punishment, ultimatums, and don’t accept him as an autonomous person.

If you make him hate you he will definitely hate Jesus too. If you love him and let him love you back (for God’s sake don’t try that shunning thing some Christians are so enthusiastic about), if he is going to come back to your faith he will.

It’s a simple equation. Carry on the way you are now and you will lose him for both Jesus and yourself. Let him be who he needs to be and love and support him and even though Jesus may still have lost him; you won’t have.

And if it is all in God’s hands his Salvation may come long after you have passed.
 
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BNR32FAN

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Our pastor has recommended continuous counseling for him until he is over what he calls this “devil phase”. I gave the book to the pastor to read so he could understand what he is dealing with. There are horrible things in this book - rape, child molestation, cannibalism, you name it. I am just scared of what my son has been exposed to and if he is drawing pentagrams on his hands it is having an influence on him!

Evil is often glorified by this world and teenagers are often drawn towards this because of their naturally rebellious nature during this time in their life. They are nearing the point in their life where they will be able to make their own decisions and finally out from under the jurisdiction of their parents. You need to view this from his perspective. He’s most likely sick and tired of being told what to do and what not to do. So in my opinion it’s probably best to approach this in a manner that is encouraging him to make the better choice rather than a forceful your going to do this my way approach. I think it’s very important to be careful not to provoke a defensive position on his part because that could lock him into a opposing mindset. Try to be encouraging without being demanding would be my advice.
 
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