Unwelcome guests

*~DJ~*

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Thank you all so much for all of the advice. I talked to my husband again and told him that I was taking the girls and leaving. I told him that he was being very disrespectful to me and things need to change. One of the guys is already out and is not welcome back. The other has 2 weeks since he is from out of town and does not know anyone. He has already told the other one that he cannot come back to stay and visits would be very limited. My girls are happy that these guys are finally going and my husband and I are talking about counseling. Thank you all so much! God Bless.
 
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live4grace

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What I wrote before I read your last post (three pages is more time than I have):

Marriage is a partnership. If he didn't talk to you and get your agreement on these visitors, he breached that partnership. You have to get him alone, tell him how you feel and put your foot down (i.e. ask him when they will leave). If you don't get any satisfaction, I'd honestly consider legal options (I don't know the law, but find an attorney and learn your options). This is already traumatic for you and it won't get better if you don't take action.

Praying for you .. :prayer:

Too funny. Praise God.
 
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WalksWithChrist

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djkraemoore said:
Thank you all so much for all of the advice. I talked to my husband again and told him that I was taking the girls and leaving. I told him that he was being very disrespectful to me and things need to change. One of the guys is already out and is not welcome back. The other has 2 weeks since he is from out of town and does not know anyone. He has already told the other one that he cannot come back to stay and visits would be very limited. My girls are happy that these guys are finally going and my husband and I are talking about counseling. Thank you all so much! God Bless.
:clap:
 
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MaraPetra

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djkraemoore said:
Thank you all so much for all of the advice. I talked to my husband again and told him that I was taking the girls and leaving. I told him that he was being very disrespectful to me and things need to change. One of the guys is already out and is not welcome back. The other has 2 weeks since he is from out of town and does not know anyone. He has already told the other one that he cannot come back to stay and visits would be very limited. My girls are happy that these guys are finally going and my husband and I are talking about counseling. Thank you all so much! God Bless.

Woohoo!!! :clap:

Kudos to you and your husband, sweetie. Counseling will help you both to iron out any disrespect issues, and anything else which may be lurking underneath the surface and causing problems. Be sure to offer your spouse the option of later attending counseling alone, especially if during the course of marriage counseling he realizes that he has issues stemming from his past.

I will offer you a hint regarding the girls...When in doubt of any situation regarding the family, watch closely how your kids act. Because young children have such fresh perspectives, their behavior is one of the first indicators that something is very wrong.

God bless you, your husband, and your kids!
 
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Mrs. Enigma

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Man, sounds like a very stressful situation!

I don't really know of any advice to give, except to pray, and stuff others have already mentioned to you.... like talking to hubby. But if he thinks you are overeacting, then I don't know what you can do. It sounds very uncomfortable.
 
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SweetSerenity

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I have actually been the one guilty of bringing in unwanted guests. Well we agreed in the beginning but because I dont set limits very well, they stayed way TOO long.

I agree...the one who should be tiptoeing around should be THEM. People who stay longer than a couple of days become family members not guests. It would be time for them to assume responsibilities like anyone else in the house. Your husband could probably use the help and put the right way, he might see that its not fair that he has to work so hard to support extra people who don't appreciate him like you do. I would suggest figuring out whats most annoying about this situation (besides the fact they are THERE....since thats the reality...they moved in). Then pick your fights, pray about it and God will give you the right thought or idea to make this situation change. In the meantime, its really important that you don't become the source of the problem....thats what I tend to do...I tend to get so overly involved that I become the focus....the real problem is your unwanted guests. Why aren't they an inconvenience to your husband? If its because he is at work you might ask him if you could come spend the day, with the kids with him,since the house is so full.....it would make the point. I mean this with love and would say it nicely---he may not realize how much you need your space and how much work you have to do in the course of the day..... I would make sure I have a clear idea of what I think "House rules" need to be before I started this conversation. I would keep it all positive.....approach it like they are staying and these are the things that will make it all better....
 
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