Uncontrolled thoughts without my will

[Kostilaks]

i pray to the Generic God due to ocd who is different than Christian God. Two days ago, I wanted to buy water and I had 2 choices of shops. A market or a chain-store Ocd was giving me "what ifs" that were made without my will, so I was anxious to choose from which store to buy water. I wanted to buy water from the market along with some other things I could find there, but my ocd was not letting me. I was going to buy water from the chain-store but it was also tainted by ocd thoughts without my will. At that moment, my ocd suggest me something like OCD: Why don't you make a promise to the Generic God NOT to buy from the chain-store and ask for a punishment to make the promise stronger. that will force you to buy from the store you want. The thoughts were not exactly like this, but I am writing them in that way due to ocd. this thoughts that were made without my will happen everytime I am in anxious state. my ocd makes suggestions. I remember, fast praying to the Generic God in my head stuff like "these are thoughts without my will and that ocd is trying to trap me" and I kept thinking which store to choose. Ocd kept sending me suggestions and thoughts like OCD: promise, punishment, promise, punishment i tried to ignore them and buy from the chain-store which was the store that I did not want to buy from. I was planning to buy from that store because it was less worrying. Ocd continue sending me thoughts like ocd: oh come on. why to buy from a store that you do not want? because it is less worrying? remember the thoughts that were made without your will a second ago? the promise-punishment thing? maybe that makes the store more worrying to buy from? I do not know what i thought at that second. i just... changed opinion and happily went to the market store which was the place i wanted to go at the first place " since these thoughts without my will happened, i am relieved that i go to the store i want without worries, since the other store is off the list due to the thoughts made without my will" all these thoughts without my will happened in 1-2 seconds. and ocd gave me thoughts without my will like ocd: Ha! you felt relieved about the thoughts that were made without your will? are you sure they were thoughts without your will? maybe you made them intentionally for a second just to use them in order to go to the store you really wanted? guess what. maybe the thoughts that were made without your will are now valid. which means maybe the promise to the Generic God is valid. i remember at that second or a few seconds later praying to the Generic God and telling Him stuff like that they were thoughts without my will and i could not control them. I started avoiding shopping from that chain-store due to these thoughts made without my will. Today, a friend of mine asked me to buy him water in order to take his medicine and i bought it from a chain-store. it was not the same chain store that I avoided but since it is a chain-store you can find different ones in different places. and ocd told me stuff like ocd: Ha! You maybe broke a promise. These thoughts made without my will happen all the time. I asked the Generic God to protect me and absolve me from these thoughts. no matter how careless i am. i told Him that are not mine

 

[Jude1:3Contendforthefaith]

If it's uncontrollable and against your own will then it's probably evil spirits harassing you.

Other Orthodox Prayers


Prayer Against Demonic Influence
Almighty God, Who delivered Your people from the bondage of the adversary, and through Your Son cast down Satan like lightning, deliver me also from every influence of unclean spirits. Command Satan to depart far from me by the power of Your only begotten Son. Rescue me from demonic imaginings and darkness. Fill me with the light of the Holy Spirit that I may be guarded against all snares of crafty demons. Grant that an angel will always go before me and lead me to the path of righteousness all the days of my life, to the honor of Your glorious Name, Father, Son and Holy Spirit, now and forever. Amen.



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[ajcarey]

With all respect and no harshness intended sir, I would consider if the torment you are going through related to dealings in your mind with this imaginary generic god have to do with wavering in your heart related to trusting and following the real God. If you focus on what clean hands and a pure heart are according to what His Word says, and you diligently pursue being blameless before Him in that way, it should go a long way to crowd out of your life these battles you are having about trivial things that the real God doesn't have an issue either way with (I mean things like which store you buy water at). By your other posts I've seen, it's no wonder if a tormented conscience over things you can control and make right, but aren't doing so, is the source of your wavering and superstitious fear over many things you can't control. I think of how it says in James that a double-minded man is unstable in all his ways; and how it says in Proverbs that the wicked flee when no man pursues, but the righteous are bold as a lion. I'm encouraging you to consider and examine yourself over these things, because if true, you know what you can definitely do to make things a lot better quickly. Christ is a good and faithful Master who might require some painful things to be done in his service, but they are definite, necessary things which He always makes it worthwhile to have done for those who choose to love Him and subject themselves to His service from their hearts. Make sure you have made and are walking in such a choice, because when definitely made to serve the Lord there is a true confidence available before God and power in that over OCD in terms of its severe detrimental effects and its torment.

By the way also: Part of making such a choice necessarily involves renouncing all false gods, which would include the generic god. Know that the real God understands your compulsive tendencies and is holding you accountable for the things you choose that are in your own power. When a thought pops into your head about the generic god, choose to renounce the generic god and don't beat yourself up over the fact that the thought popped in; just choose to follow through with whatever the real God has said is the right thing to do and pray to Him for His help to carry that out (Hebrews 4:12-16).

 

[Mari17]

OCD is a mind disorder, not evil spirits.