Two things that destroy love

[The Unforgettable Fire]

I was thinking this morning about two things centering around a passage in the New Testament, Colossians 3. I won't quote it. You can look it up if you want.

The first part is about putting away behavior that is not loving as a new creation in Christ.

I felt really bad afterwards when over the weekend I engaged in some very nasty talk with a friend. The world says it is the way real men are supposed to talk, but I was convicted and felt dirty afterwards. Of course I knew better, but wanted to fit in.

It was yet another lesson for me. There are things I should not do and behaviors I should not engage in because they are not loving. Ugly things said even in jest are not loving. There are other things mentioned too if you read the passage.

But then there is the flip side which is the side I have struggled with much more.

I got thrown into another conversation over the weekend. This time a religious conversation. Instead of it producing love, compassion, kindness, humility, etc... It turned into something else. I ended up being judged and felt condemned because I didn't subscribe to the same exact beliefs of this other Christian.

So I experienced two things over the weekend and have felt wounded by both.

One was me giving into worldly behavior in the name of friendliness. The other was a difference of belief that took two Christians who should have been focused on loving each other and left at least one feeling slightly wounded from it.

The balance I believe is walking in love without compromising the Biblical definition of love.

I'm not very good at it, but I want to be.



Any thoughts or advice for me?

 

[Andrea411]

A few scriptures came to mind but most simply about the situation with the friend who disagreed theologically. I suggest you ponder on that... was he right about his views? Do not be afraid to challenge yourself. A good arguer can make you doubt your convictions but if your convictions are certain, then you will be stronger for having defended them. Allow yourself to feel the pain and remember how it feels when we do the same to others. Make it an opportunity to learn. Don't allow an 'offense' to enter but allow it to force growth. It goes two ways we either get mad or get humbled. You already know the path the Lord has for you. If we don't humble ourselves, God will find a way to do it for us. there are lots of people who enjoy the job...LOL.

James 4:6 But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: "God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble."

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. Rom 12:21

A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back Prv 29:11

John 12:43 (NIV) For they loved praise from men more than praise from God.

1 Jn 1:8-10 (Phi) If we refuse to admit that we are sinners, then we live in a world of illusion and the truth becomes a stranger to us. But if we freely admit that we have sinned, we find him reliable and just--he forgives our sins and makes us thoroughly clean from all that is evil. For if we say "we have not sinned", we are making him a liar and cut ourselves off from what he has to say to us.

Hope thats helpful, God bless, andrea

 

[The Unforgettable Fire]

A few scriptures came to mind but most simply about the situation with the friend who disagreed theologically. I suggest you ponder on that... was he right about his views? Do not be afraid to challenge yourself. A good arguer can make you doubt your convictions but if your convictions are certain, then you will be stronger for having defended them. Allow yourself to feel the pain and remember how it feels when we do the same to others. Make it an opportunity to learn. Don't allow an 'offense' to enter but allow it to force growth. It goes two ways we either get mad or get humbled. You already know the path the Lord has for you. If we don't humble ourselves, God will find a way to do it for us. there are lots of people who enjoy the job...LOL.

James 4:6 But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: "God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble."

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. Rom 12:21

A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back Prv 29:11

John 12:43 (NIV) For they loved praise from men more than praise from God.

1 Jn 1:8-10 (Phi) If we refuse to admit that we are sinners, then we live in a world of illusion and the truth becomes a stranger to us. But if we freely admit that we have sinned, we find him reliable and just--he forgives our sins and makes us thoroughly clean from all that is evil. For if we say "we have not sinned", we are making him a liar and cut ourselves off from what he has to say to us.

Hope thats helpful, God bless, andrea

Thank you. I will think on this. Good thoughts and verses.

 

[mourningdove~]

I was thinking this morning about two things centering around a passage in the New Testament, Colossians 3. I won't quote it. You can look it up if you want.

The first part is about putting away behavior that is not loving as a new creation in Christ.

I felt really bad afterwards when over the weekend I engaged in some very nasty talk with a friend. The world says it is the way real men are supposed to talk, but I was convicted and felt dirty afterwards. Of course I knew better, but wanted to fit in.

It was yet another lesson for me. There are things I should not do and behaviors I should not engage in because they are not loving. Ugly things said even in jest are not loving. There are other things mentioned too if you read the passage.

But then there is the flip side which is the side I have struggled with much more.

I got thrown into another conversation over the weekend. This time a religious conversation. Instead of it producing love, compassion, kindness, humility, etc... It turned into something else. I ended up being judged and felt condemned because I didn't subscribe to the same exact beliefs of this other Christian.

So I experienced two things over the weekend and have felt wounded by both.

One was me giving into worldly behavior in the name of friendliness. The other was a difference of belief that took two Christians who should have been focused on loving each other and left at least one feeling slightly wounded from it.

The balance I believe is walking in love without compromising the Biblical definition of love.

I'm not very good at it, but I want to be.



Any thoughts or advice for me?

'cuz you asked ...

I believe that your desire to be 'good at it' will make you better at it.

That desire you have comes from God. I would be thankful for it, keep it fresh, keep it alive, express it back to Him often, and He will enable you to be what He wants for you to be, to love as He wants for you to love.

We can analyze it ... and maybe come up with some very helpful ideas, too ... but ultimately I believe agape love (what I hear you describing) all gets down to grace ... the grace of God working in and thru us by the power of the Holy Spirit 'to love'.

Without God's grace I know I am nothing.
Without God's grace I am not very loving, nor very loveable.

Agape love is about 'the desire to love' ... and God's grace being free to flow thru us and express itself to others, as love.
That is what I've learned and believe.

And yes, it does call for living the surrendered life, and forgiving others often ...
and accepting the forgiveness of God as often as we, too, do mess up.

God bless.

 

[The Unforgettable Fire]

'cuz you asked ...

I believe that your desire to be 'good at it' will make you better at it.

That desire you have comes from God. I would be thankful for it, keep it fresh, keep it alive, express it back to Him often, and He will enable you to be what He wants for you to be, to love as He wants for you to love.

We can analyze it ... and maybe come up with some very helpful ideas, too ... but ultimately I believe agape love (what I hear you describing) all gets down to grace ... the grace of God working in and thru us by the power of the Holy Spirit 'to love'.

Without God's grace I know I am nothing.
Without God's grace I am not very loving, nor very loveable.

Agape love is about 'the desire to love' ... and God's grace being free to flow thru us and express itself to others, as love.
That is what I've learned and believe.

And yes, it does call for living the surrendered life, and forgiving others often ...
and accepting the forgiveness of God as often as we, too, do mess up.

God bless.

Thank you for this. Very encouraging. Bless you.