Trying to wrap my mind around this but doubt still lingers.

chelsea89

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I believe in God for a number of reasons, but lately I've been doubting Christianity in its entirety because alot of things just don't make sense.

For one why would an all powerful, omnipotent, and loving God create finite creatures like us, stick us on a single planet away from Him, Heaven, Angels etc, give us five senses and a conscience and reasoning, and tell us to believe in Him based off of something others wrote thousands of years ago? If He were really like a parent wouldn't He stay close, visable, or even give us some kind of scientific or verifiable ability to KNOW He exists. Its really nit fair to kill the [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] among us for not believing in the Theory of Relativity, but that is in essence what God is asking. Or having an infant conceptualize our judicial system, its impossible.

Another thing that kills me is how we are going ti be punished for eternity for the mistakes made in this life apart from God. A child may willfully disobey his parents because he doesn't want to do something and be punished for it but I've never heard a child ask if his parents were real. Isn't it more an act of Mercy or compassion to show every human being on earth what their purpose is, Who He is, and then punish us on the willfull mistakes we make vs us being born blind and having to figure something as astronomical as God out on our own? I just don't get it.
 

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Dear chelsea89. When God made Man, God made us Good. God made us to be with Him and Love Him for eternity. Adam and Eve, ( our prototype) were with God in the Garden of Eden. The Bible tells us what happened there,
how Adam and Eve believed a lying Serpent, rather than trusted God. They were banished to Earth, and all Mankind after them. But instead to learn to love God,
trust and worship Him, all men and women moved farther and farther away from God. In time Jesus came, and He showed us how God really is: Our Loving Heavenly Father, who wants us back again. In Matthew 5, verse 48,
Jesus tells us: " Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in Heaven, is perfect." Jesus also tells a Lawyer in Matthew 22: " The first and
great Commandment is: Love God with all thy heart, with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. The second is: Love thy neighbour as thyself." Then Jesus points this out: " On these two Commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets." God is Love, and God wants loving children/sons and daughters, to
live with Him for eternity. God wants our Love freely given, and no conditions
made. Jesus our Saviour is ready to help and guide us all the way back to God: Jesus Is The Way.
How do we show God that we follow His Commandments and Love God?
We start by treating all we know and all we meet as we would love to be treated, kindly and with love, helpful hands and being a good neighbour.
God will see our efforts, and God will approve and bless us. Jesus will give us his Love and Joy, and the Holy Spirit will empower us with His Love, also.
Jesus told us to " ask and ye will receive," then we thank God and share all Love and Joy with all around us. We will keep asking, thanking, and receiving,
and sharing all with our neighbour. Love is very catching, and Love will turn us into men and women, which God our Heavenly Father wants to have around Him. I say this with love, chelsea. Greetings from Emmy, your sister in Christ.
 
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dysert

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I believe in God for a number of reasons, but lately I've been doubting Christianity in its entirety because alot of things just don't make sense.

For one why would an all powerful, omnipotent, and loving God create finite creatures like us, stick us on a single planet away from Him, Heaven, Angels etc, give us five senses and a conscience and reasoning, and tell us to believe in Him based off of something others wrote thousands of years ago? If He were really like a parent wouldn't He stay close, visable, or even give us some kind of scientific or verifiable ability to KNOW He exists. Its really nit fair to kill the [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] among us for not believing in the Theory of Relativity, but that is in essence what God is asking. Or having an infant conceptualize our judicial system, its impossible.

Another thing that kills me is how we are going ti be punished for eternity for the mistakes made in this life apart from God. A child may willfully disobey his parents because he doesn't want to do something and be punished for it but I've never heard a child ask if his parents were real. Isn't it more an act of Mercy or compassion to show every human being on earth what their purpose is, Who He is, and then punish us on the willfull mistakes we make vs us being born blind and having to figure something as astronomical as God out on our own? I just don't get it.
I'm not good at answering "why" questions, but there are a few misconceptions in your post that deserve attention.

For one thing, we aren't away from Him. In fact, the original humans enjoyed intimate fellowship with Him until they disobeyed. And even at that, since God is omnipresent, He's still here; it's just that our sin has broken that intimate relationship. Furthermore, Christians have the Holy Spirit (God) living within us.

I think you're confusing the Theory of Relativity with the Theory of Evolution?

I don't know why He doesn't make Himself more obvious to us, but I do know that "without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is" (Heb. 11:6).

What does an infant being unable to conceptualize the judicial system have to do with this?

We won't be punished for eternity for mistakes. We'll only be punished if we haven't accepted Jesus as our Lord and Savior.

I think the bottom line is that we have to choose to believe something. You can choose to believe in God per His revealed Word, or you can choose to believe something different. Personally, I think His revealed Word provides sufficient rationale for believing in Him. I'll just have to wait for answers to my "why" questions.
 
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bling

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For one why would an all powerful, omnipotent, and loving God create finite creatures like us, stick us on a single planet away from Him, Heaven, Angels etc, give us five senses and a conscience and reasoning, and tell us to believe in Him based off of something others wrote thousands of years ago? If He were really like a parent wouldn't He stay close, visable, or even give us some kind of scientific or verifiable ability to KNOW He exists. Its really nit fair to kill the [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] among us for not believing in the Theory of Relativity, but that is in essence what God is asking. Or having an infant conceptualize our judicial system, its impossible.
Love is the most powerful force in all universes, since it compels even God to do all that He does.

That Love would also compel God to make beings (not for His sake, since that would be selfish on His part) for the sake of those that would obtain this Godly type Love (becoming like God Himself). God is totally unselfish.

Unfortunately, God cannot instinctively place this “Love”(Godly type Love) in beings since that would make it a robotic type love and also God cannot force this “Love” on beings since that would be like a shotgun wedding with God holding the shotgun. God, thus provided the very best situation for humans (beings), that will just accept God’s help, to obtain this unique wonderful Love as a free will choice with likely alternatives (this makes it a real choice).

God is not needing (God does not need anything) you to recognize His existence or “worship” Him out of knowledge and fear. God is not trying to “get” something from man but is trying to give the greatest possible gift to man, but man has to humbly accept that gift as pure charity since that is what it is (pure charity).

It is a huge help to humans not to have knowledge of God’s existence, but to have to trust (faith) in a benevolent Creator since that “faith” is a humbling act on the believer’s part and humility is needed to humbly accept God’s charity. (Humans have too much false pride to accept charity.) The lowliest mature adult on earth can easily believe in a benevolent creator to help him in this life or the next life.

No matter how much help God provides most humans seem to continue to refuse God’s help (although He stands next to them wanting to help) and will never turn to Him, but choose to seek selfish pleasures and maintain their false pride.

Another thing that kills me is how we are going ti be punished for eternity for the mistakes made in this life apart from God. A child may willfully disobey his parents because he doesn't want to do something and be punished for it but I've never heard a child ask if his parents were real. Isn't it more an act of Mercy or compassion to show every human being on earth what their purpose is, Who He is, and then punish us on the willfull mistakes we make vs us being born blind and having to figure something as astronomical as God out on our own? I just don't get it.

You have more than just a “purpose” since you have an objective in this life. That “objective” is to obtain Godly type Love, so you can Love God and secondly others with all your heart, soul, mind, and energy.

Only those in heaven have eternal life, while those in hell will eventually be annihilated.

Sin is not the problem only unforgiven sin is a problem.

God just wants the unbeliever to turn to his Creator for help and God will do the rest. (Knowing there is a god does not mean you will be humble enough to accept His help).

Most people do not seem interested in an unselfish type Love (seeking selfish type love only) and in heaven there is only this unselfish type Love and it is one huge Love Feast so these people would actually be unhappy in heaven.
 
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1watchman

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If one truly wants to learn the way and truth of God, one should not speculate and certainly not challenge God. If one reads John 1; John 3; John 14, then asks God humbly and reverently to teach them the meanings there, they will receive His answer. We will not get answers by speaking against God and His ways.
 
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food4thought

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I believe in God for a number of reasons, but lately I've been doubting Christianity in its entirety because alot of things just don't make sense.

Please don't take this as an attack on your faith. But do you really know Him personally? Do you KNOW that you have the Holy Spirit dwelling within you? Really, the reality of His Spirit in us is enough to cast aside any number of doubts like these. I DO understand your doubts, though. I have asked something like these questions as well, and I'll try to express the answers I found that have satisfied me.

For one why would an all powerful, omnipotent, and loving God create finite creatures like us, stick us on a single planet away from Him, Heaven, Angels etc, give us five senses and a conscience and reasoning, and tell us to believe in Him based off of something others wrote thousands of years ago?

As another poster mentioned, mankind was created in felloship with God, the current situation is a result of Adam and Eve's rebellion. As sinfull creatures, we could not endure the true pressence of God without being destroyed, and anything less than what God really is could be explained away as some form of alien life trying to control us, right?

If He were really like a parent wouldn't He stay close, visable, or even give us some kind of scientific or verifiable ability to KNOW He exists. Its really nit fair to kill the [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] among us for not believing in the Theory of Relativity, but that is in essence what God is asking. Or having an infant conceptualize our judicial system, its impossible.

We have been given verifiable proof:

Rom 1:18-23 NKJV For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who suppress the truth in unrighteousness, (19) because what may be known of God is manifest in them, for God has shown it to them. (20) For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even His eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse, (21) because, although they knew God, they did not glorify Him as God, nor were thankful, but became futile in their thoughts, and their foolish hearts were darkened. (22) Professing to be wise, they became fools, (23) and changed the glory of the incorruptible God into an image made like corruptible man—and birds and four-footed animals and creeping things.

Those who come to faith in Christ have the added witness of His Spirit dwelling in them.

Another thing that kills me is how we are going ti be punished for eternity for the mistakes made in this life apart from God. A child may willfully disobey his parents because he doesn't want to do something and be punished for it but I've never heard a child ask if his parents were real. Isn't it more an act of Mercy or compassion to show every human being on earth what their purpose is, Who He is, and then punish us on the willfull mistakes we make vs us being born blind and having to figure something as astronomical as God out on our own? I just don't get it.

As I stated above, we would not survive an encounter with God as He truly is in our sinfull state, and anything less than Who/what God really is does not do Him justice and could be explained away by our sinfull minds as something less than an eternal, omnipotent, holy God. God gave us the best revelation of Himself possible in Jesus Christ, and the world has rejected Him overall. He will return in even greater glory in judgement, and after 1000 years of His rule, the world will rebel against Him again. Only then will God give up trying to woo sinners back to Himself and bring an end to it, destroying the heavens and earth and bringing the universe into fellowship with Himself... can you imagine what it will be like to see the Father as He truly is? I like to call it "raw God", nothing but Him as He is. That is the time we all ultimately look forward to... this current world is fallen and will not be reconciled to God, and it is only by His grace and mercy that any of us are saved.

hope this helped;
Mike
 
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chelsea89

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I understand the concept of Love in Christianity, I really do, but this in and of itself fails to answer my questions.

Why can't I question God? I'm sincerely asking these.questions because I wish not to lose my faith over a few contradictions in my head, whether founded or not, they're still there and they need answered. Sweeping things under the rug and following blindly aren't taught in the Bible I read. Prophets and people in direct contact with God questioned Him and His motives all the time only to find they were in their best interest. Such as Sarah and Abraham conceiving Isaac so late in life but creating a conflict.by having Ishmael and not trusting Him. The problem here is that God isn't directly speaking to me.

Plus.if I didn't question and work things out it would.fester until I either just get so frustrated that I walj away again or get angry at the whole idea of God.and rebel. I don't have to have all the answers but it just needs to make some rational sense on top of providing emotional fufillment.

And what are you talking about no selfless love being on earth? Have you met any good mothers lately? I don't change my kids diapers and make them eat their veggies because I'm getting something out of it or for fear of CPS taking them away,but because I unconditionally love them. Why wouldn't someone.want unconditional love? Isn't that what we are all searching for? I'm sure no one willfully wants to go to hell (besides maybe the weirdos who worship Satan and wish to be there) but people who really believe i. thwir god and really want to please them, have simply gotten it wrong. They've made a mistake based on wrong information, often learned from childhood, and we don't punish our kids if someone leads them astray and they mess up. Like if my older son tells my younger one to throw rocks I punish my older son not my younger son and explain to my youngwr son why throwing rocks is wrong. But if for 100 years or more a familial line is fed wrong information and are bred to believe it true (such as being raised.Muslim or Hindu) how is it that persons fault?
 
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chelsea89

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I understand the concept of Love in Christianity, I really do, but this in and of itself fails to answer my questions.

Why can't I question God? I'm sincerely asking these.questions because I wish not to lose my faith over a few contradictions in my head, whether founded or not, they're still there and they need answered. Sweeping things under the rug and following blindly aren't taught in the Bible I read. Prophets and people in direct contact with God questioned Him and His motives all the time only to find they were in their best interest. Such as Sarah and Abraham conceiving Isaac so late in life but creating a conflict.by having Ishmael and not trusting Him. The problem here is that God isn't directly speaking to me.

Plus.if I didn't question and work things out it would.fester until I either just get so frustrated that I walj away again or get angry at the whole idea of God.and rebel. I don't have to have all the answers but it just needs to make some rational sense on top of providing emotional fufillment.

And what are you talking about no selfless love being on earth? Have you met any good mothers lately? I don't change my kids diapers and make them eat their veggies because I'm getting something out of it or for fear of CPS taking them away,but because I unconditionally love them. Why wouldn't someone.want unconditional love? Isn't that what we are all searching for? I'm sure no one willfully wants to go to hell (besides maybe the weirdos who worship Satan and wish to be there) but people who really believe i. thwir god and really want to please them, have simply gotten it wrong. They've made a mistake based on wrong information, often learned from childhood, and we don't punish our kids if someone leads them astray and they mess up. Like if my older son tells my younger one to throw rocks I punish my older son not my younger son and explain to my youngwr son why throwing rocks is wrong. But if for 100 years or more a familial line is fed wrong information and are bred to believe it true (such as being raised.Muslim or Hindu) how is it that persons fault?
 
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chelsea89

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Mike that answer was the most helpful. I was saved at 12 but haven't felt God near me or had a true communion with Him in years. I miss it and am frustrated that my heart has been hardened by doubts and experiences etc... I can see how a Holy God would be too much for a sinful person to withstand. Like bacteria in the face of lava. But a dream or personal revelation, maybe some tangible help when one is down is all I'm asking right now.
 
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food4thought

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Mike that answer was the most helpful. I was saved at 12 but haven't felt God near me or had a true communion with Him in years. I miss it and am frustrated that my heart has been hardened by doubts and experiences etc... I can see how a Holy God would be too much for a sinful person to withstand. Like bacteria in the face of lava. But a dream or personal revelation, maybe some tangible help when one is down is all I'm asking right now.

I understand completely... I went through some very difficult times and darkness several years after being saved, and questioned the goodness and even the existence of God... in the depth of my doubt and despair I did something I will regret for the rest of my life. Please hold on to that nugget of faith, you won't regret it!

In the meantime, I'm praying for you to have your petition to God answered. Something you might want to consider is that oftentimes our alienation from God's pressence is our own doing... think back to when you enjoyed true fellowship with Him... is there something He made clear to you He wanted you to do or not do, but you for whatever reason didn't obey? Think and pray on that, and if something comes to mind, follow up on that and repent. This may not be the case, but it is for me.

The LORD bless you, and prosper you; the LORD make His face to shine upon you, and be gracious unto you. The LORD lift up His countenance upon you, and give you peace. (Num 6:24-26 NKJV)
 
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in the depth of my doubt and despair I did something I will regret for the rest of my life. Please hold on to that nugget of faith, you won't regret it!
This is a lesson that can't be learned early enough. Don't apply a permanent fix to a temporary problem. (I wish I had learned that lesson early myself.)
 
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chelsea89

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Oh theres been plenty in the last 6 years. Married the wrong man who isn't Christian, had our first 2 kids out of wedlock, had my daughter out of adultry, converted to Judaism and then Islam, tried evert drug in the book and even prostituted myself to make ends meet for my kids. I guess the biggest sin though has been just not trusting God through everything and compounding my problems by trying to solve them myself. I am very sorry for all of it but then again I can't change the past.
 
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bling

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Oh theres been plenty in the last 6 years. Married the wrong man who isn't Christian, had our first 2 kids out of wedlock, had my daughter out of adultry, converted to Judaism and then Islam, tried evert drug in the book and even prostituted myself to make ends meet for my kids. I guess the biggest sin though has been just not trusting God through everything and compounding my problems by trying to solve them myself. I am very sorry for all of it but then again I can't change the past.
You sound like half the women in our “Ruth and Naomi” class at my church. (I would love to be able to join them, but it is women only). Do you live in the Dallas area?

I will pray for you to find a support group and please do not think you are alone.
 
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bling

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I understand the concept of Love in Christianity, I really do, but this in and of itself fails to answer my questions.

Why can't I question God? I'm sincerely asking these.questions because I wish not to lose my faith over a few contradictions in my head, whether founded or not, they're still there and they need answered. Sweeping things under the rug and following blindly aren't taught in the Bible I read. Prophets and people in direct contact with God questioned Him and His motives all the time only to find they were in their best interest. Such as Sarah and Abraham conceiving Isaac so late in life but creating a conflict.by having Ishmael and not trusting Him. The problem here is that God isn't directly speaking to me.

It is only after I have prayed repeatedly for hours, meditated, sought out help from others, studied intensely, and really gave God time to respond do I get an answer, but like the prophets of old those answers come in visions and dreams that are not crystal clear, but are only made clear after the situation changes. People ask “How can I believe in God” while looking at a tree.
And what are you talking about no selfless love being on earth? Have you met any good mothers lately? I don't change my kids diapers and make them eat their veggies because I'm getting something out of it or for fear of CPS taking them away,but because I unconditionally love them. Why wouldn't someone.want unconditional love? Isn't that what we are all searching for? I'm sure no one willfully wants to go to hell (besides maybe the weirdos who worship Satan and wish to be there) but people who really believe i. thwir god and really want to please them, have simply gotten it wrong. They've made a mistake based on wrong information, often learned from childhood, and we don't punish our kids if someone leads them astray and they mess up. Like if my older son tells my younger one to throw rocks I punish my older son not my younger son and explain to my youngwr son why throwing rocks is wrong. But if for 100 years or more a familial line is fed wrong information and are bred to believe it true (such as being raised.Muslim or Hindu) how is it that persons fault?
I did not say “no selfless love being on earth” but in heaven there is only unselfish type Love. Truly unselfish Love should be found as a contrast to the world in every Christian.

People like to be “loved” for, who they are and what they have done (that is selfish type love, heavily rewarded in this world). When you do stuff not really caring if; you receive any “love” back from your actions, is closer to unconditional type Love.

There are lots of people on this earth right now that will never have the opportunity to accept or reject Godly type Lover, so they will never fulfill their earthly objective, but that does not mean they will not go to heaven with just a wonderful strong “child for wonderful parent type love”.
 
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chelsea89

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Thank you all for your responses and prayers. I posted this in the Praise Reports section already, bit figured that God should be glorified in this thread as well. I was driving home from my friend's house tonight and turned on my Christian radio station. It was a song that really spoke to me, although the name and lyrics escape me now, and I started to talk to God. I got to a point in the mostly one-sided.conversation ( at that point) where I started half-pondering, half-asking God about my BIG breakthrough. The one that you see on tv where you're crying and shaking with.the.overwhelming sentiment of God's love and.forgiveness. Where the crackheads throw down their pipes and the chronic gambler never touches a slot machine again etc etc... And God said that He's taking me in babysteps. Not everything is about that BIG breakthrough, and that these little talks I had whave with Him are just as vital to my spiritual growth, if not moreso. So I began to lament my sins and feel like less than nothing, lower than.dirt so to speak. And He said to look at what He did with nothing. The Heavena and Earth, Sun and Moon, Plants and Animals, the shallowest stream to the very depths of the Sea, were made from.nothing. So I asked Him if I gave Him me (nothing) would He make something. And something worthwhile was how I meant it (I know God knows our intentions even without all the right words). I thought to myself "yes?/no?" and God said, "Absolutely!". I love my God and I'm so glad to have had even that one talk with Him after being in this wasteland.for 7 years. Thank you all so much for your encouragement, nonjudgemental
atitudes, and most of all your prayers.
 
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chelsea89

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It is only after I have prayed repeatedly for hours, meditated, sought out help from others, studied intensely, and really gave God time to respond do I get an answer, but like the prophets of old those answers come in visions and dreams that are not crystal clear, but are only made clear after the situation changes. People ask “How can I believe in God” while looking at a tree.

I did not say “no selfless love being on earth” but in heaven there is only unselfish type Love. Truly unselfish Love should be found as a contrast to the world in every Christian.

People like to be “loved” for, who they are and what they have done (that is selfish type love, heavily rewarded in this world). When you do stuff not really caring if; you receive any “love” back from your actions, is closer to unconditional type Love.

There are lots of people on this earth right now that will never have the opportunity to accept or reject Godly type Lover, so they will never fulfill their earthly objective, but that does not mean they will not go to heaven with just a wonderful strong “child for wonderful parent type love”.


I apologize for being.condescending. I'm going through a real rough patch and it brings out the combativeness in me. God is setting me.straight.now. And fortunately I've had this unconditional love shown to me by my youth pastor and his family when I was in my teena. We still stay in contact because he made such an impact on my life without expecting anything in return and without ever.judging me for anything I did. I however dissapointed him a few times and that look in his eyes killed.me more than any sort od guilt trip I could pull on myself. I am Very lucky to know this man of God and hope someday to be like him because he's like Christ. I try not to follow man but having stepping stones and role models is always good.

So I hope I didn't offend you, please forgive me.if I did, I was just being.frisustrated and it wasn't meant personally.
 
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bling

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I apologize for being.condescending. I'm going through a real rough patch and it brings out the combativeness in me. God is setting me.straight.now. And fortunately I've had this unconditional love shown to me by my youth pastor and his family when I was in my teena. We still stay in contact because he made such an impact on my life without expecting anything in return and without ever.judging me for anything I did. I however dissapointed him a few times and that look in his eyes killed.me more than any sort od guilt trip I could pull on myself. I am Very lucky to know this man of God and hope someday to be like him because he's like Christ. I try not to follow man but having stepping stones and role models is always good.

So I hope I didn't offend you, please forgive me.if I did, I was just being.frisustrated and it wasn't meant personally.
You did nothing to offend me. If you can get around that younth paster it might be great for you.
It is interest but my cousin interned in LV before becoming a pastor ministering to show girls and other entertainers. He almost lost his life in a motorcycle accident, but recovered and lives in PA now. He had some great stories about women just like you, so there are lots in LV.
 
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food4thought

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Thank you all for your responses and prayers. I posted this in the Praise Reports section already, bit figured that God should be glorified in this thread as well. I was driving home from my friend's house tonight and turned on my Christian radio station. It was a song that really spoke to me, although the name and lyrics escape me now, and I started to talk to God. I got to a point in the mostly one-sided.conversation ( at that point) where I started half-pondering, half-asking God about my BIG breakthrough. The one that you see on tv where you're crying and shaking with.the.overwhelming sentiment of God's love and.forgiveness. Where the crackheads throw down their pipes and the chronic gambler never touches a slot machine again etc etc... And God said that He's taking me in babysteps. Not everything is about that BIG breakthrough, and that these little talks I had whave with Him are just as vital to my spiritual growth, if not moreso. So I began to lament my sins and feel like less than nothing, lower than.dirt so to speak. And He said to look at what He did with nothing. The Heavena and Earth, Sun and Moon, Plants and Animals, the shallowest stream to the very depths of the Sea, were made from.nothing. So I asked Him if I gave Him me (nothing) would He make something. And something worthwhile was how I meant it (I know God knows our intentions even without all the right words). I thought to myself "yes?/no?" and God said, "Absolutely!". I love my God and I'm so glad to have had even that one talk with Him after being in this wasteland.for 7 years. Thank you all so much for your encouragement, nonjudgemental
atitudes, and most of all your prayers.

I am blessed to hear that God has received you despite your past... we all have past regrets of one level or another, the key is to not stay in the place of kicking ourselves for what we did/didn't do... you are on the right track and I pray that God will lead you to a fellowship that won't condemn you for your past, and will help you grow into that "something significant" that you prayed for.

All I can say is that you are not nothing, you are a child of the Most High God who has just returned from your prodigal ways! Never underestimate His grace, Chelsea. I believe He will do what He has planned for you if you will let Him. Please read Luke chapter 15 and be blessed!

God bless;
Mike
 
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dysert

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God said that He's taking me in babysteps. Not everything is about that BIG breakthrough
This is a great thing to learn. And it teaches us patience as well. When I left my previous church (over 2 years ago) and have since been going to this new church I've been in the spiritual doldrums. There's no singing of the doctrinally rich hymns, no place for me to use my spiritual gift(s). Then we moved to a new neighborhood, and all of a sudden I'm leading a *neighborhood* Bible study. I believe I can make more of an impact on my neighbors than I ever could to a group of fellow church-goers. Realizing that God moves us in baby steps slower than we'd like makes us better able to handle those periods where it seems we're going nowhere. Good for you!
 
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