Originally posted by Wolseley
Well, this clown might have been an animal doctor, I'm not sure.
He put an IV in my left arm, to start with, and shoved approximately 900 feet of needle up my artery; then decided he'd screwed it up, so he pulled it all back out and went to work on the other arm.
That accomplished, he started hacking on my impacted teeth. It took him upwards of an hour and a half to do the job, and I was in considerable pain while he was doing it; whatever the junk was they were giving me, it didn't put me under, all it did was render me unable to scream. I could hear everything they were saying, but it was like it was coming down a mile-long tube. Every yank just about sent me into orbit, but of course, I was restrained in the chair, so I couldn't move. Or talk.
He finally finshed mauling me, and stuck two wads of cotton about the size of a Clydesdale's hoof in either side of my face, and said, "These will be painful for about three to four hours, and they'll ooze for 24. Do not spit, or you'll rip the sutures." He lied; they hurt for 48 hours, and they oozed for five days.
They called in another airman from my shop, handed him a prescription for pain pills, and told him, "Go to the base pharmacy, fill this, then take him back to the barracks and put him to bed."
I got back to the barracks and went to bed; but so as not to "rip the sutures", I didn't spit, just like the veterinarian had told me. To keep from drowning, every time my mouth filled up, I swallowed. As long as I was laying down, I was okay---but if I sat up, the room went round and round, and I got very, very sick, very, very fast.
Finally, about 7:00 that night, I tried to sit up, and up it came---I ended up in the latrine, puking up a whole stomachful of blood and crap; all that stuff I'd been swallowing all day. It looked like a red Niagara Falls.
My jaws hurt afterwards, but I felt much better. At this point, I said to myself, "If puking up my guts didn't rip those sutures out, then spitting this mess out isn't, either." I staggered down to the C.Q. and found an empty coffee can, sat it beside my bunk, and it became my spittoon. For the next week, that's what I did, spit up black blood, red blood, and goo.
I finally healed up, but what an experience. I still remember going into the mess hall and cutting up hamburgers into half-inch squares and swallowing them whole, because I couldn't chew them. The first trip, I got a carton of milk, a glass of Coke, and a small cup of banana pudding; the register gal was a Vietnamese war bride, and she said, "This all you eat?" I pointed to my mouth, and with a faceful of cotton, said, "Teef out." She made a pained face and said, "Ooooh!"
"Ooooh!", indeed. That's an experience you only want to go through once every five or six lifetimes.