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The rise of the lonely single man

Discussion in 'Singles (Only*)' started by ThisIsMe123, Aug 11, 2022.

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  1. VCR-2000

    VCR-2000 Well-Known Member

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    There are men that are falling into despair because of all this too.
     
  2. VCR-2000

    VCR-2000 Well-Known Member

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    What can we do about this stuff besides waiting on the return of Jesus Christ, when the contract of intimate man-woman relationships become null and void anyway?
     
  3. Jamdoc

    Jamdoc Watching and Praying Always

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    Wait for Christ, and understand that your being happy is not always His focus, but rather His glory.
    Not much else you can do about that. Some people are able to live vicariously and feel that because Christ is glorified all their needs are met. If you can do that.. I guess that's your answer.
    If you can't. Well, I guess you're just not going to be happy.
    He can always make it worse and I guess we just have to be grateful He doesn't make it worse.
     
  4. DragonFox91

    DragonFox91 Well-Known Member

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    Here’s a small list of why I believe dating is dying out. I do believe although marriage rates are declining, people are still ‘hooking up’, casually dating, & rooming together, just not tying the knot. That being said, I do think as time marches on, that will decline as well. I’m sure there’s more reasons, this is just a quick list.

    Video games & other new forms of self-isolation
    Belief marriage makes life harder (heartbreaks, have to care for someone else, etc.)
    Seeing divorces
    Self-entitlement
    Declining social skills
    Feminism
    Porn
    Fear of stalkers, rapists, etc.
    Already married & other would-be mentors not knowing how to assist singles
    Dating sites
     
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  5. timewerx

    timewerx the village i--o--t--

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    Adam's first sin was he coveted what the other creatures had that he didn't.

    God didn't make a big deal of it and even played along with Adam's wishes.

    That's the tricky thing with God. God will sometimes "play along" but doesn't always mean he's blessing you. Worse, he might even be punishing you for your worldliness.

    Another example when the Israelites coveted what their neighbors had they didn't - having a king / worldly political system. God played along and gave them exactly what they want but what they received is a bad thing (instead of having God as their ONLY king).

    Careful what we pray for and ask God. May we only ask things of above and not worldly or material things.

    I'd bet most of you only heard this teaching for the very first time. You don't hear this taught in churches because even your pastors are blinded by worldliness and materialism. You can only see these things focusing on the Bible without the lenses of materialism and fleshly pursuits.
     
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  6. timewerx

    timewerx the village i--o--t--

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    Seeking happiness can expose you to deceptive teachings. Many deceive by telling people what makes them happy or feel good about themselves.

    Turn your back on worldly things. Stop watching TV or even movies, stop looking at things that show you corrupt values, that makes you covet things other people have that you don't. Long after I did that after my mind is finally cleansed of this corruption, I stopped coveting relationships anymore. The strain and longing is gone and finally content being single.

    Of course, I still entertain the possibility of getting married one day but I don't stress about it anymore. Even though I'm already in my early forties, no pressure, no hurry.
     
  7. Jamdoc

    Jamdoc Watching and Praying Always

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    GOD was the one who said Adam alone was not good. Adam being alone wasn't a SIN, and honestly, before God introduced him to all the animals and had Adam name them (which was after God said He'd make a suitable companion for Adam), Adam may have not even known he was alone and without a mate. Where would he know the concept?

    So no, it was not sin, it was God saying it was not good and was not complete.
     
  8. Juan777

    Juan777 Active Member

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    In my experience, (and I'm not encouraging it to other Christians who are convicted of the Lord to stop it like you have) I don't think TVs or movies, at least with me, are making me feel covetous of relationships. Seeing couples enjoying nature together when I'm going out alone biking. Watching ladies in my neighbourhood avoid eye-contact because either I'm too ugly or they know my living situation. I think you simply just have to exist and leave the house in order to get hit by these thoughts or issues.

    I usually feel good not covetous if I stay at home in these matters. For that matter, you can be covetous even going to church when you see other believers in relationships or are married, etc... WHILE YOU ARE ALONE.
     
  9. Jamdoc

    Jamdoc Watching and Praying Always

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    Yeah seeing fornicating couples on TV doesn't provoke any real desire for me. What makes me smile and then die a little inside, is seeing actually an old Christian couple that's been together for decades and still loves each other. That's the glimmer, the tiny crack of light in the door, the hint at what I believe God wanted us to have originally.

    I just get sad at the idea that maybe God changed His mind.

    God's original plan: Man and Woman together, having dominion of the Earth, tending it and keeping God's creation for Him. That was their worship, serving the purpose that God had set out for them. There was nothing about singing or falling on their face.
    the first man and woman, totally messed that up, obviously, and while the bible does indicate that we get dominion back and we rule WITH Christ, and it's what I believe, there is also language in the bible, lots of singing and falling on faces, you know, and enough Christians believe that that's eternity is singing and praising and falling on your face, that we essentially replace Angels as God's choir, and enough Christians back that up with Matthew 22:30 that we'll be like Angels.. that I start to believe it and it drives me into despair, that God would change His plans.
    I look at the first plan God had and that is what calls at me and speaks to me. This idea of just replacing Angels as a choir.. despair, loss, regret, that is the feelings it evokes. It also brings fear. Fear that if God changes His plans and changes His mind, then nothing is secure. A promise from God, even an unconditional, eternal one, then would you have to take it with a grain of salt because God might change His mind about things like, eternal life?
     
  10. Juan777

    Juan777 Active Member

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    Fornicating couples on TV? As an aside, I will mention that, I always look at the parent's advisory on IMDB before I look at any TV show and movie. If you look at the parents advisory it will show that type of objectionable content is on there. You can also google Christian reviews about movies. Therefore, if I want to watch fornicating couples than I've made a choice that I'm upset with God for being single and alone to have allowed myself that limited scope of rebellion to watch a TV-show or movie like that. We are supposed to guard our hearts and minds. Therefore, I currently do not watch any shows or movies with "fornicating couples" as I have committed not to and I'm not upset enough to rebel by looking at any TV-show or movie with such material. You are not rebelling yourself by watching that?

    As far as the rest of your post, I would say that is interesting. I have not read that verse that way. What I thought it meant was that our glorified bodies (ie the celestial body referred to in 1 Cor 15) would be in such a glorified state and unencumbered by the sin nature that you will not feel the same way like you do now.

    When God said it was not good to be alone, even in context, Adam was the only person in the Earth. He made a biological function to allow humanity to populate the Earth. Now the Earth is full of people and Heaven will have glorified saints there too as well as the presence of God.

    Did God mean that He did not intend the whole planet to be occupied by one man who can live forever? Can you imagine being the only person in Earth with just animals and plants as friends? It is a big planet to walk around?

    What I'm saying is maybe you are reading into that too much and making it more personal than it should be? I mean if you don't feel like singing, maybe you could visit a Black Hole or do something else? You have a glorified body right?
     
    Last edited: Aug 17, 2022
  11. Jamdoc

    Jamdoc Watching and Praying Always

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    You know what I mean, just throwing an example. Like I don't mean sex scenes in particular, just boyfriend/girlfriend couples that are in TV often shown living together, etc. Point was that TV and movies don't make me covetous, more so, seeing families together in settings like Church are what can make me covetous, not really coveting their specific family, no, I'm glad they have their family. I just wish I had one of my own too.

    It depends on who you listen to, pastors and such, there are many people who will teach, that all you'll want to do is stare at Jesus and sing to Him.
    Like even sermons that will start out saying "yeah I know, it's not just gonna be everyone saying 'HOLY HOLY HOLY'" but then they'll loop back around on their description of heaven to "then you'll hear the singing, the worship... and you'll want to be there and you'll never want to leave!"
    and I die a little hearing it
    John MacArthur teaches that kind of heaven too.
     
  12. VCR-2000

    VCR-2000 Well-Known Member

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    A lot of men can't find anyone to hook up, never mind to marry. Its funny.
     
  13. VCR-2000

    VCR-2000 Well-Known Member

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    I just have to ask, if covetousness comes from lacking something another has, why didn't God design from the start that everyone will have the same things?

    In fact, why tease us with being born into this period where he allows us to experiment with this stuff only to null and void it from us one day? Why even care or have a preference for how his creation acts at all, unless he just cared about his own glory or ego?

    Sorry, I'm just frustrated.
     
  14. Juan777

    Juan777 Active Member

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    Experiment with what stuff? You mean marriage and turning into angel-like people afterwards or something else?

    Why are you frustrated if you are able to get married? Just get married and have fun.
     
  15. timewerx

    timewerx the village i--o--t--

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    Good question.

    Eden existed in that state and then sin crept in. And finally, the Israelites coveted having earthly kings. They probably lusted at the lavish lifestyles / material wealth of royalty, not understanding such system will lead to poverty (for most) and lack of peace.
     
  16. VCR-2000

    VCR-2000 Well-Known Member

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    I almost wonder if advancing technology is more of an overall curse to mankind in disguise.
     
  17. ThisIsMe123

    ThisIsMe123 This And That

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    Apparently, people try to find "sin" in everything. :p
     
  18. Juan777

    Juan777 Active Member

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    The sin of covetousness starts with the temptation to eat the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil and the belief that God was holding back something from them and wanted more than what God had choose to offer them. It looks like its the root of the original and first sin. Anything else branches off from that original sin.
     
  19. VCR-2000

    VCR-2000 Well-Known Member

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    I think I am kind of mad at God because I want to have my experience before the stuff hits the fan and I want God to do it and give me a miracle. He unfortunately allowed man the free will to try to ruin it for us.
     
  20. Jamdoc

    Jamdoc Watching and Praying Always

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    In this case though, God actually is holding something back from some, and has done so before (see Jeremiah), and intends to hold back from everyone eventually, it's like giving someone a gift temporarily and then taking it away forever, and wondering why people have FOMO about it.
     
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