The prodigal sister

[Fantine]

Yes, I have one of those. She has $13,000 in dental bills and, because she's declared bankruptcy, no credit.

Not only has she "borrowed" money from us numerous times, she's not only never paid us back but also bounced checks in attempting to pay us back small amounts.

My husband (who, though retired, still has a much higher income than I do and about 15 times as much in his IRA) has had it with her. Frankly, so have I.

We are co-signing a car loan for her daughter (my niece) this weekend, but she is honest and reliable and much more mature tan her Mom. One reason is that she had inherited money from her father (my sister's ex) and my sister ran through it...

Believe it or not, she was pretty successful in her career, although she had to retire at 55. I am sure she made at least $150K, maybe more...she was a compulsive gambler...

I know she's going to try to hit us up for the dental work...and I can't just "give" her $13K without my husband's OK.

She IS the prodigal sister...and although I share in the pursestrings of our family, I don't have the sole say. Ugh! Should I try to convince my husband to let her hit us with another bad debt, or just say "no."

 

[Godlovesmetwo]

Well I was a problem gambler too. But I managed to quit at age 38. I valued my partner and marriage and suffer guilt to this day over it.
But you realise other people aren't wired the same as you. It is easy to make me feel guilty but sounds like the prodigal sister is different that way. They have selective amnesia and are only focussed on their next money problem.
I just pray I am never in a situation like your sister though. It would kill me to have to beg for a loan from a sibling. It may even cause me to be suicidal, tbh.

 

[Fantine]

Her significant other brought his mother to live with them. She is well-off and completely selfish and inconsiderate. I think my sister should have her SO approach her. Either his mother would give her the money or get angry and move to assisted living. Either way my sister would be better off.