• Welcome to Christian Forums
  1. Welcome to Christian Forums, a forum to discuss Christianity in a friendly surrounding.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to be able to join in fellowship with Christians all over the world.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon and God Bless!

  2. The forums in the Christian Congregations category are now open only to Christian members. Please review our current Faith Groups list for information on which faith groups are considered to be Christian faiths. Christian members please remember to read the Statement of Purpose threads for each forum within Christian Congregations before posting in the forum.
  3. Please note there is a new rule regarding the posting of videos. It reads, "Post a summary of the videos you post . An exception can be made for music videos.". Unless you are simply sharing music, please post a summary, or the gist, of the video you wish to share.
  4. There have been some changes in the Life Stages section involving the following forums: Roaring 20s, Terrific Thirties, Fabulous Forties, and Golden Eagles. They are changed to Gen Z, Millennials, Gen X, and Golden Eagles will have a slight change.
  5. CF Staff, Angels and Ambassadors; ask that you join us in praying for the world in this difficult time, asking our Holy Father to stop the spread of the virus, and for healing of all affected.

Featured The Christian Inferiority Complex

Discussion in 'Christian Advice' started by Duke of Stratford, May 21, 2020 at 4:55 PM.

  1. Duke of Stratford

    Duke of Stratford One day at a time.

    101
    +167
    United States
    Non-Denom
    Single
    US-Others
    How do you stop comparing yourself to other Christians?

    I definitely commend the on-fire-every-moment sorts of people; I think a faith that burns bright like that is so, so amazing. But it’s hard not to get discouraged when you see people on social media who journal all the time, who read Christian books every week, who have amazing prayer lives, who seem so confident in their relationship with God all the time. I know they’re not perfect, and many of them are genuinely honest about their struggles. Even so, I can’t help but feel guilty. I’m just...not like that. Or I’m in a different place. I know this is a journey, and different people have different-looking walks. It’s so easy to fall into the “I’m not crazy on-fire like them, so I must be lukewarm” mindset.

    How do you break free from that?
     
    • Like Like x 3
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • List
    We teamed up with Faith Counseling. Can they help you today?
  2. 2PhiloVoid

    2PhiloVoid Oh Lord! Why couldn't I have been a pole vaulter? Supporter

    +6,096
    United States
    Christian
    Married
    US-Others
    Who's on fire every moment ... !!! ??? Where !!! ??? ^_^


    First off, I'd put a stop to some of this by freeing yourself of the expectations that some evangelicals foist upon other Christians by measuring just "how much fire they are in the Lord." This measure isn't always scriptural or objective.

    Secondly, the term 'Lukewarm' has more to do with adulterating one's faith by being devoted to Mammon and such and then thinking, at the same time, that all that 'stuff' is in all necessity given by God. Being lukewarm is kind of like winning a trip to Las Vegas and then, upon arrival there, thanking Him for the opportunity to frolic in a place devoted to..................well, you know. 'Stuff.'

    I doubt this is the problem you're having.

    Third. Focus on the fact that to some extent our walk of faith really is a journey, one in which not everything is, or is meant to be, discernible or enjoyable. So, if in the process of undertaking the journey, some of the road that is traveled isn't so scenic or appealing or wonderful, don't feel bad that you're not "crazy on-fire" like some other Christians you might know.

    That's my two cents, but feel free to ply me with questions if some of the things I've said aren't clear. (I'm notorious for a lack of clarity ... ^_^)
     
    Last edited: May 21, 2020 at 5:20 PM
    • Like Like x 2
    • Funny Funny x 1
    • Useful Useful x 1
    • List
  3. Rene Loup

    Rene Loup A Saved Wolf Among Sheep

    78
    +116
    Canada
    Christian
    Private
    For me personally, just understanding that even Christians can be prone to desiring social status to the point of willful deception too.

    I remember going on a stupidly right winged Bible prophecy forum that made a topic about Christians who still engage in willful sin. Everyone there was talking about how awful this was and all that. It gave off vibes that they were immune to it but if you study psychology, you find that these people may very well be trying to take the negative attention off of themselves and project it onto others. It's a similar mindset of the Pharisees.

    A personal incident was at a Pentecostal tent meeting revival. We were told by the preacher to close our eyes and try to see a vision. Afterwards, we were asked who didn't see a vision and I was the only one who raised my hand. It was embarrassing at the time but now that I think about it, I'm willing to bet at least half of them were lying to avoid the embarrassment of not being spiritual enough to experience the supernatural.

    Point is, even Christians are concerned with their own social standing among their peers and will try project a glittering facade to maintain that. As my grandmother would say, "Believe half of what you see and nothing of what you hear."
     
  4. Hammster

    Hammster Gomaristist Staff Member Site Advisor Supporter

    +18,403
    United States
    Reformed
    Married
    US-Libertarian
    The good thing is that you notice it and see it as an issue. The only one we should compare ourselves to is Jesus. And we all fall tremendously short, even those who you see who look like they are doing great. And honestly, if they are doing great, and it’s not an act, then they know that they, too, fall short.

    So my advice is that you discipline yourself to not compare yourself to them. The one in charge of your sanctification is Jesus. He’s responsible for your growth.

    It’s not a bad thing to be disciplined. Spending time in the word is really a necessity. But there’s no set time limit. And there’s no set time limit for prayer. But the more you do either, the more you’ll want to do more. But don’t ever feel like you don’t measure up because none of us do. ;)
     
    • Like Like x 2
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • List
  5. Chris V++

    Chris V++ Socially Distancing Supporter

    +1,010
    United States
    Non-Denom
    Married
    You should try being related to my brother. Twice a year mission trips to help set up medical camps at his own expense to places like El Salvador.

    I tell myself for what it's worth, God didn't activate Moses till he was 80ish.
     
  6. public hermit

    public hermit social troglodyte Supporter

    +2,967
    United States
    Christian
    Single
    US-Others
    People have different temperaments. The on-fire/lukewarm dichotomy can look like the extrovert/introvert distinction. But, that can't be right, can it? Only extroverts truly love Jesus? I think not. Be kind to yourself. God loves you. So, just do you.
     
    Last edited: May 21, 2020 at 5:24 PM
    • Like Like x 2
    • Agree Agree x 2
    • List
  7. ~Cassia~

    ~Cassia~ my Lighthouse in the storm Supporter

    +10,934
    Canada
    Christian
    Private
    That’s true. I’ve been to Pentecostal meetings where the church kids were practising their lyrical tongues, but I’ve never seen an adult instructing another adult to do things of that sort. Teaching was done in skits for the younger kids and everyone played a musical instrument that was considered platform workers. I couldn’t ever be one of them because of the choice to watch TV. But being an audience member wasn’t a bad thing either. It was actually a lot of fun. One skit was about everyone getting saved off Giligan’s island. Anyway, anyone that looks for all bad is sure to find it too.
     
  8. Michie

    Michie Human rights begin in the womb. Supporter

    +29,225
    United States
    Catholic
    Married
    US-Others
    Every Christian has their gifts and weaknesses. We all have our peaks and valleys. What you see is not always what’s really happening. It’s unhealthy to compare yourself to others overall. Let alone the Faith. We are all in different points in our journey. You should just see them as inspiring or edifying but as I’ve stated before, it is not a contest.
     
    • Like Like x 4
    • Agree Agree x 3
    • Winner Winner x 1
    • List
  9. Rene Loup

    Rene Loup A Saved Wolf Among Sheep

    78
    +116
    Canada
    Christian
    Private
    The biggest reasons why I don't like lying is because for one, I don't want to have to maintain a web of lies for social approval. I do have a good memory but it's not unlimited and is downright exhausting. Second, as soon as it's time to display the abilities I claim to have, I'll quickly be exposed as a fraud and lose any and all credibility I had. God is not a fan of fake-it-till-you-make-it nonsense and will withhold actual spiritual gifts from those who would be untrustworthy like that.
     
  10. ~Cassia~

    ~Cassia~ my Lighthouse in the storm Supporter

    +10,934
    Canada
    Christian
    Private
    Deception for social approval isn’t an easy game. Enjoy the times you have with God as golden moments and soon you’ll be brought more and more into His confidence.
     
  11. WrappedUpinHisLove3

    WrappedUpinHisLove3 Active Member

    456
    +187
    United Kingdom
    Christian
    Private
    I must admit i was instructed to speak in tongues. they prayed for me to have it and i was told to open my mouth and just let anything come out. yet my tongues must be genuine because things have happened when i pray in tongues and i often use it as a wya of speaking to God when i cant find the words. i guess if God wanted me to have that gift at that time, HE would give it regardless, and obviously He msut have, in my case as i still use tongues today.
     
  12. ~Cassia~

    ~Cassia~ my Lighthouse in the storm Supporter

    +10,934
    Canada
    Christian
    Private
    The language of the heart sensing God is the same thing really, whether in silent prayer or praise.
     
  13. WrappedUpinHisLove3

    WrappedUpinHisLove3 Active Member

    456
    +187
    United Kingdom
    Christian
    Private
    yes it cetainly feels that way when i prophesy or somtimes when i pray. i thik it is easy to get too prescriptive about techniques. If God wants you to have a certain gift, He won;t let a wrong method stop it. of course we are to do things the right way but none of us are perfect and am so glad God does not withold gifts based on our performance or our ignorance/lack of understanding. i believe lack of faith is the only thing that can block a gift and even then i believe God is more powerful than our inadequacies
     
  14. ~Cassia~

    ~Cassia~ my Lighthouse in the storm Supporter

    +10,934
    Canada
    Christian
    Private
    What you see is not always what is really happening?
     
  15. Michie

    Michie Human rights begin in the womb. Supporter

    +29,225
    United States
    Catholic
    Married
    US-Others
    Not internally. I know when I was going to the nursing homes, etc. I was struggling but you could not tell it by my outward actions.
     
  16. WrappedUpinHisLove3

    WrappedUpinHisLove3 Active Member

    456
    +187
    United Kingdom
    Christian
    Private
    I relate to this a lot. both my sister and i grew up in vr difficult circumstances, and yes, y sister has had her scars from that, but when it comes to God, my sister hads always been the one with the strong faith and a blazing red hot love for Jesus.

    i want to be like that and sometimes for a short season, i manage it, but my sister seems to be very stable in her faith generally. i myself struggle massively with coinsistency and tend to be prone to impulses, moods, weird ideas etc that mean am not always on track like she is

    I lov emy sister dearly but sometimes i feel a bit anxious around her because she loves Jesus so much and He flows from her all the time. me, I am definitelya committed believer but my sister sometimes says i am too worldy because i can talk about other things and spend my time doing secular type things but my sister talks about Jesus constanlty. her faith is genuine as well, she isn't faking it!!1 wish i could be like her
     
  17. ~Cassia~

    ~Cassia~ my Lighthouse in the storm Supporter

    +10,934
    Canada
    Christian
    Private
    When outer conditions do not meet inner condition ...
    In the region rooted in inner being, He is still subduing His enemies and conducting His mysterious education.
     
  18. Michie

    Michie Human rights begin in the womb. Supporter

    +29,225
    United States
    Catholic
    Married
    US-Others
    I call them growing pains.
     
  19. WrappedUpinHisLove3

    WrappedUpinHisLove3 Active Member

    456
    +187
    United Kingdom
    Christian
    Private
    Having said the above, I do believe that i do serve God in my own way- to me i seem to serve God in ways that are quite practical eg i see a need and God helps me meet it if i can. whereas my sister spends a lot of time at feet of Jesus. now i do believe, in my case, that i need to so more of that- i tend to be more a Martha than a Mary. maybe the key is that my sister spenda a LOT of time with Jesus.

    also i sometimes struggle with intimacy with Jesus because i battle a lot of fear and shame yes, my sister and i both went through the same hellish childhood experiences, more or less, and yes, she has her issues too, but for me, trust has been particularly hard, as i tend to be more anxious. and as an adult i put myself ina lot of self destructive situations, so i have had more isn to deal with.

    my sister gave her heart to Jesus as a small child. me, i was a small child sitting in sunday school feelijg confused and bitter and believing Jesus hated me because i knew deep down i had a lot of darkness in my soul, a lot f bitterness. my sister was no less wounded but she seemed a more innocent, sunny natured person than me. just a question of personality- i was a stormy intense child form the word go, my sister sensitive too but not as up anjd down as i was. later on as we became teenagers, my sister suffered depression and i believe some post trauma symptoms as well, whereas i ended up with borderline personality disorder, extreme trauma reactions, a lot of acting out behaviour (some of it rooted in sin but at same time more thna that, i feel). she was the good girl who was meek and knew how to toe the line, me i was often timid and fearful but also rigid, moody and restless and bored easily. so yeah, temperamnet may playa part. i do thnk that though we all sin, some of us are easily led more, and i woudl describe mysefl as the one who would easily fall into worng behaviour. i think y sister's faith had a lot to do with the fact that even as a child, she had the fruit of goodness and self control . me, i took longer to get that.
     
    • Prayers Prayers x 1
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • List
  20. Lukaris

    Lukaris Orthodox Christian Supporter

    +1,096
    Eastern Orthodox
    Single
    • Like Like x 1
    • Prayers Prayers x 1
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • Winner Winner x 1
    • List
Loading...