I'm quite stressed out about my wedding preparation and it's taking a slight toll on my emotional and physical health (I've had less than 3 months to plan the wedding but we are discarding a lot of unnecessary details + simplifying things). My fiance and I have decided on a budget (8k) and we have been trying to stick to that, going well so far. The problem is that my mum had gone ahead with a lady she knows from another church to arrange the fresh flowers i.e. bouquet, altar flower, foyer flower pot, as the lady use to own a florist shop before she started arranging flowers herself at home as a private business.
I was quite happy with the arrangement and had already sent the flower lady some pictures and colours of what I wanted (via my mum's phone contact). It's now about a month until my wedding and I wanted to get her number from my mum so that I can contact her myself to see how things are going, and receive a brief idea of when I can get a approximate quote for all the flowers she is making for the wedding. This is so that I can budget and let my fiance also know how much funds we have remaining to spend on others things we need for the wedding. But my mum gets into a fit every time I ask for the lady's number because the lady told her she will have to import the flowers and arrange it before she can give us a price. So my mum believes that:
I won't be able to know the price anyway until the flowers are imported, arranged the day before my wedding and it is rude to rush the lady to give me a quote a month before my wedding.
I've told my mum that I don't need the quote this early, like right now, but I just want the lady to tell me WHEN I can get a quote (as in, when she will be ready with the flowers and tell me how much it will all cost). I'm getting really stressed because I can't just wait until the night before to find out how much my flowers cost (I'm afraid it will go over budget AND that I don't know how much remaining funds I have to spend on other things).
When I calmly convey this reason to my mum, she starts accusing me of how I've spend unnecessary money on other wedding decorations (and how the guests will make a mockery of me for having so much decorations while having cheaper flowers) and splurged on shopping (which is totally unrelated to the wedding anyway) when I could just spend this money on the flowers. In reality, I've only spent $70 on the wedding decorations and hiring the rest for $100.
I don't know what to do - how to honour her and be respectful while controlling my temper but at the same time be able to respect my fiance's wish of staying inside the budget when I won't even know the cost of flowers until a few days before the wedding day!
What should I say or do guys????
I was quite happy with the arrangement and had already sent the flower lady some pictures and colours of what I wanted (via my mum's phone contact). It's now about a month until my wedding and I wanted to get her number from my mum so that I can contact her myself to see how things are going, and receive a brief idea of when I can get a approximate quote for all the flowers she is making for the wedding. This is so that I can budget and let my fiance also know how much funds we have remaining to spend on others things we need for the wedding. But my mum gets into a fit every time I ask for the lady's number because the lady told her she will have to import the flowers and arrange it before she can give us a price. So my mum believes that:
I won't be able to know the price anyway until the flowers are imported, arranged the day before my wedding and it is rude to rush the lady to give me a quote a month before my wedding.
I've told my mum that I don't need the quote this early, like right now, but I just want the lady to tell me WHEN I can get a quote (as in, when she will be ready with the flowers and tell me how much it will all cost). I'm getting really stressed because I can't just wait until the night before to find out how much my flowers cost (I'm afraid it will go over budget AND that I don't know how much remaining funds I have to spend on other things).
When I calmly convey this reason to my mum, she starts accusing me of how I've spend unnecessary money on other wedding decorations (and how the guests will make a mockery of me for having so much decorations while having cheaper flowers) and splurged on shopping (which is totally unrelated to the wedding anyway) when I could just spend this money on the flowers. In reality, I've only spent $70 on the wedding decorations and hiring the rest for $100.
I don't know what to do - how to honour her and be respectful while controlling my temper but at the same time be able to respect my fiance's wish of staying inside the budget when I won't even know the cost of flowers until a few days before the wedding day!
What should I say or do guys????
