Thank you, the things I think I should give up aren't sinful they're things like novels ( since a lot of books are not Godly I primary read books aimed at younger teenagers and kids, I used to read the series of unfortunate events, I had a worry problem with them too but I haven't read them recently, and shows which are also aimed at younger kids, I have a little sister so we are careful what she's exposed to we've been watching miraclous ladybug together but honestly I don't like that show and don't feel an urge to get rid of it. I really like writing and making up stories I try to make sure they are all biblically themed in some way but since I really like writing this is where I feel the largest pull to ban myself. for instance I spent a while formulating a story plot and was really happy about it I was sure God had given it to me and I thanked Him for it. but a few days later I ended up banning myself from writing about key plot points.
I really do want to make God happy, but I feel like I'm not doing enough for God, I read the Bible and pray but I often feel like my prayers are weak and that God is displeased with them. I will try to focus on what God asks of us in the bible thank you for your post it was helpful.
Just one little thing .... often if you feel a sense of compulsion to do this or that (or not do it) along with anxiety related to displeasing God ... this needs to be discerned VERY carefully. Especially if it puts up any kind of wall between you and God. If the enemy can't tempt us to turn away from God and play with bad things, he will usually attempt to turn our good thoughts toward God into something bad and drag us into a maze it's hard to find our way out of.
You can expect conviction and a desire to repent if you engage in blatant sin, or even if you do a thing that God makes you realize could really hurt someone (even emotionally, spiritually, whatever) that perhaps you didn't know when you did it. In this way (and others) He grows and refines us.
But you should not feel a generalized sense of disapproval for obscure reasons when you approach Him. Especially with anxiety, compulsion, etc. The enemy likes to try to confuse us like this.
Consider Jesus' response to the woman caught in the act of adultery. That WAS blatant and serious sin, yet He forgave her.
Some denominations teach that God does these kinds of subtle things, turning from us, rewarding us, punishing us, but we are never sure why, and it's our job to figure it out so we can follow Him. God really doesn't treat us in such ways. Scripture teaches us what is right and wrong. And God understands that we begin at one point, and we should progress. He will slowly make us aware of sins and progressively transform us into His likeness if we just do what we know to do. He doesn't play dark, confusing games with us. Those are from another source, designed to confuse us and make us give up.
Writing fiction is a very specialized thing though, and one I'm interested in the dynamics of myself. My best suggestion if you are interested is to find really good writers of that sort, and read their works, and analyze what they are saying.
(The reason it is specialized is that opening up our imagination is always dangerous to a degree - having it properly trained and formed is a good safeguard.)
I'm only giving partial information on what is really a big subject. I hope it helps.
God be with you.
