Simple question (assertiveness)

[Left]

Sorry for all the posts. I don't really study psychology, and I love this section of the forum.

Besides being rich (or some other worldly thing), is being assertive the best way to gain respect?

Should we be assertive? Why or why not?

 

[Ken Rank]

Sorry for all the posts. I don't really study psychology, and I love this section of the forum.

Besides being rich (or some other worldly thing), is being assertive the best way to gain respect?

Should we be assertive? Why or why not?

If you are trying to impress this culture, yes. If you are trying to stand out as a reflection of God to the world around you, then no.

 

[Left]

If you are trying to impress this culture, yes. If you are trying to stand out as a reflection of God to the world around you, then no.

Yet I'd almost argue that you still want to be respected by culture to get God's Word across.

 

[Ken Rank]

Yet I'd almost argue that you still want to be respected by culture to get God's Word across.

I would say no but I understand the need to stay near the line.

 

[Kenny'sID]

From a Christian point of view, I guess it depends on where you draw your lines on what's assertive.

But in general, and in more direct answer the question...it depends.

It's all about the circumstances, I would say.

 

[joshua 1 9]

Besides being rich (or some other worldly thing), is being assertive the best way to gain respect?

There was a book written on "How to Win Friends and Influence People". If you want to make friends then you need to find a common ground. For example if someone likes to play golf then talk to them about golf. You will be their friend because you have something in common with them.

 

[Greg J.]

The best way to get respect in the long term, other than giving yourself wholly to Jesus, is to strictly have it for others. (Btw, my respect isn't any more likely to be won by someone being rich than being poor.)

Careful you don't fall into this trap:
Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ. (Galatians 1:10, 1984 NIV)

Rather:

Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be slave of all. (Mark 10:43-44, 1984 NIV)

For whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted. (Matthew 23:12, 1984 NIV)

 

[rockytopva]

Sometimes we need to be assertive...

1 And again he entered into Capernaum after some days; and it was noised that he was in the house.
2 And straightway many were gathered together, insomuch that there was no room to receive them, no, not so much as about the door: and he preached the word unto them.
3 And they come unto him, bringing one sick of the palsy, which was borne of four.
4 And when they could not come nigh unto him for the press, they uncovered the roof where he was: and when they had broken it up, they let down the bed wherein the sick of the palsy lay.
5 When Jesus saw their faith, he said unto the sick of the palsy, Son, thy sins be forgiven thee. - Mark 2

The friends of the paralytic were assertive... They could not get to Jesus for the crowd... So... Time to be assertive and put a hole in the roof!

 

[Left]

rockytopva - Thanks. I know I'm going to rock the world - I'm just not ready to yet. I gotta read that Bible some more.

 

[Archie the Preacher]

Sorry for all the posts. I don't really study psychology, and I love this section of the forum.

Besides being rich (or some other worldly thing), is being assertive the best way to gain respect?

Should we be assertive? Why or why not?

My world view is such, the best way to gain respect is 'competence'. Being a competent worker, hobbyist, Bible student or human being garners more respect than wealth or assertiveness.

Assertiveness is demanded when one is the most qualified to take charge of something. Even the President should give precedence to a plumber if the toilet is plugged. I know how to do certain things; I will not direct the janitor how to clean up. One who is "assertive" in a situation or event not in their line of expertise is a fool.

 

[Left]

My world view is such, the best way to gain respect is 'competence'. Being a competent worker, hobbyist, Bible student or human being garners more respect than wealth or assertiveness.

Have you ever watched Big B Theory? I'd say that the character Sheldon Cooper is very smart and competent in his line of work. Yet not only do the fictional characters on the show hate him, but most real life viewers do as well. He is the villian of the show.

Of course, you could always argue that he is respected, but also hated.

 

[Archie the Preacher]

Theory, the ensemble of characters for The Big Bang are the people with whom I attended High School.

I rather like Dr. Cooper. I get him. One of my dearest and closest friends seems to be the basis for Sheldon's character, except the writers toned down his weirdness and made him a bit more warm and cuddly for the show.

To directly address your comment, 'competence' takes numerous forms. You will note I mentioned 'competence' as a human being. Dr. Cooper is an excellent theoretical physicist. He is less competent as a human being. (Although he seems to be learning.)

But I will stand by my comments and opinions.

And before you ask, both Leonard and Howard have my traits. Except I was never so lucky with female relationships.

 

[GrowingSmaller]

I don't actually plan on being respected. I just live out my life as best I can. Maybe that's why few people respect me.

 

[Paradoxum]

It seemed like being assertive/ confident is important.

Being quite non-assertive and naturally shy in real life, this sucks.

 

[Left]

It seemed like being assertive/ confident is important.

Being quite non-assertive and naturally shy in real life, this sucks.

Yeah, few people like the nerdier types like me - except for other nerds.

 

[Paradoxum]

Yeah, few people like the nerdier types like me - except for other nerds.

It's cool, I'm geeky.

 

[Left]

It's cool, I'm geeky.

I haven't really seen you much on the forums. To get to know me without reading a lot of my posts, I came here as a Christian but ended up choosing Agnosticism. I like philosophy. And I'm Equal Oppurtunity when it comes to debating with people, and think those good debaters who decline an argument with me, aren't worth my respect.

 

[Paradoxum]

I haven't really seen you much on the forums. To get to know me without reading a lot of my posts, I came here as a Christian but ended up choosing Agnosticism. I like philosophy. And I'm Equal Oppurtunity when it comes to debating with people, and think those good debaters who decline an argument with me, aren't worth my respect.

I used to be more active. Have you joined in the last 6 month to year?

I used to be a conservative committed evangelical Christian, but now I'm a humanist atheist. Philosophy is my degree, and I believe in reason, evidence, decency, liberty and equality.

 

[Left]

I have been posting actively for two weeks or so.

 

[Khalliqa]

Sorry for all the posts. I don't really study psychology, and I love this section of the forum.

Besides being rich (or some other worldly thing), is being assertive the best way to gain respect?

Should we be assertive? Why or why not?

The best way to gain respect, specifically as it relates to assertiveness, imo, is to know when and where to be assertive and when and where not to..