Should you just settle for the "best" local Church you can find?

[FerventDisciple]

I think I've looked up just about every Church I could find in my city and visited the "best" ones from that list but I haven't been truly satisfied with any, but just content with a few. I'm under no illusions that Church is perfect or there is a perfect Church out there so should I just settle with content rather that true satisfaction?

I'm not just taking myself into account with this decision, I want it to be the right one for my family. We've just withdrawn ourselves from a Church my Wife has been a part of for over a decade and my stepdaughter grew up in it but now it is dying and on the verge of being dead (I was the only man left other than the Pastor. It's being run in an unbiblical way and the Pastor and his Wife are completely out of it, not there, backslidden.). This has all had a negative effect on us spiritually and especially my stepdaughter who's become very apathetic to any Church and the Christian walk after recent experiences.

So should I just go with the "best" local Church I can find? Even if I disagree with secondary issues on the SOF and it doesn't quite have the fire I want? We've been attending Calvary Chapel recently and although I like the Bible teaching and worship on occasion there will be whole sermons I disagree with (like yesterday, pre-trib rapture). My Wife and I want to have fellowship with brothers and sisters and I want my stepdaughter to be in a youth group and have Christian friends, to grow in faith. I want my son to grow up in a solid, Jesus loving Church (he's only 4 months old now but still).

 

[ByTheSpirit]

why I know where you are they have the Tom Brown ministry I don't know if you tried out his church I think its called the Word of Life I don't know you can do search Tom Brown there I dunno El Paso had some pretty questionable congregations there. My wife and I attended abundant Living Faith Center there with Charles Nieman and I wanted to rip my hair out every time I went there it was crazy I don't know man I would just tell you though pray about it you know and God could be at leading you to start a home church you know those things are springing up all over the place and that's that's what I'm doing now you know what its it's awesome I'll be praying for you

 

[FerventDisciple]

why I know where you are they have the Tom Brown ministry I don't know if you tried out his church I think its called the Word of Life I don't know you can do search Tom Brown there I dunno El Paso had some pretty questionable congregations there. My wife and I attended abundant Living Faith Center there with Charles Nieman and I wanted to rip my hair out every time I went there it was crazy I don't know man I would just tell you though pray about it you know and God could be at leading you to start a home church you know those things are springing up all over the place and that's that's what I'm doing now you know what its it's awesome I'll be praying for you

I've checked out Tom Brown's site before and it had some rather, let's say interesting teaching. Apparently his Church has been designated a Cathedral by the Anglican Church and he is ordained a Bishop by them, wearing the clerical clothes and all.

I've heard stories about the youth Pastors at Abundant Living being out at the night clubs on Saturday nights and then teaching in Church the next morning. It's kinda known here as the Church where everyone who is culturally Christian goes and Christian in name only, like the Lakewood of El Paso.

The best I've found so far is CC and a non-Dom Charismatic Church. But yeah kinda difficult and limited with the Churches here. In England I didn't have any Church or fellowship as they were all ecumenical in my town, so never really had good experiences with "Church". In my walk I've mainly withdrawn rather than compromised with Churches which I can deal with but with a family now I have to have other considerations.

Thanks bro

 

[geetrue]

Proverbs 3: 5-7
5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
6 In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.
7 Do not be wise in your own eyes;

God help you find the right church ... Your location is Texas, right?

Lots of good churches in Texas ... I was born and raised there, but I know it's changing and changing fast.
It's almost like God is testing us and the devil is tempting us.

Watch out who you let take care of your little four month old child. All churches child care workers are not the same.
Spirits can be transferred through laying on of hands.

Find one that has mixed race, mixed poor and rich, and lots of children running around. Plays and singing and worship.
Fellowship and food drew me into a good church (Horizon Christian Fellowship)

The teaching part is available on TV, radio or cassette and CD's from the good people far away.

God be with you in your search.

Oswald Chambers said, "When we discern that other people are not growing spiritually and allow that discernment
to turn to criticism, we block our fellowship with God.
God never gives us discernment so that we may criticize, but that we may intercede".

 

[RDKirk]

I think I've looked up just about every Church I could find in my city and visited the "best" ones from that list but I haven't been truly satisfied with any, but just content with a few. I'm under no illusions that Church is perfect or there is a perfect Church out there so should I just settle with content rather that true satisfaction?

I'm not just taking myself into account with this decision, I want it to be the right one for my family. We've just withdrawn ourselves from a Church my Wife has been a part of for over a decade and my stepdaughter grew up in it but now it is dying and on the verge of being dead (I was the only man left other than the Pastor. It's being run in an unbiblical way and the Pastor and his Wife are completely out of it, not there, backslidden.). This has all had a negative effect on us spiritually and especially my stepdaughter who's become very apathetic to any Church and the Christian walk after recent experiences.

So should I just go with the "best" local Church I can find? Even if I disagree with secondary issues on the SOF and it doesn't quite have the fire I want? We've been attending Calvary Chapel recently and although I like the Bible teaching and worship on occasion there will be whole sermons I disagree with (like yesterday, pre-trib rapture). My Wife and I want to have fellowship with brothers and sisters and I want my stepdaughter to be in a youth group and have Christian friends, to grow in faith. I want my son to grow up in a solid, Jesus loving Church (he's only 4 months old now but still).

I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. -- Philippians 4

So....what's wrong with being content?

It's unlikely that you will ever find a congregation in which every pastor or teacher will always say everything that invokes an "amen" in your spirit. In most cases--such as eschatology--it makes no difference in your ability to be in fellowship in that congregation or in what you need to wake and do each day in the Lord's mission.

I'm not particularly a hardcore pre-tribber myself...I'm content to being a "pan tribber"--I'll see how it all pans out.

But the Calvary Chapel of Honolulu that we were members of back in the early 90s (under paster Bill Stonebraker) is the congregation that I constantly think of and speak of when it comes to being the closest I've ever seen to an Acts 2/Acts 4 church.

And the education they gave our elementary-school-aged daughter provided an exemplary foundation for the tough challenges to her faith that she's faced since then--and she will give witness to that herself.

I'm not saying you must be a member of that Calvary Chapel--but I'm saying you haven't given us IMO a reason not to stay there, if it otherwise "fits."

But of course, you and your wife should be in prayer about this.

At one momentous point, when my wife and I felt that we needed to make a dramatic change in the type of congregation we should attend, the Lord explicitly said to me during prayer about one particular congregation we'd visited, "Tell them tomorrow you want to join."

Then that next morning, one of the associate pastors "coincidently" paid us a courtesy visit.

 

[ByTheSpirit]

Another thing brother is this. Perhaps God wants you in a church to shed some light there. That is always a possibility and a ministry of itself.

 

[FoundInGrace]

Go where is best for your stepdaughter, sounds like shes the one that needs a place that will inspire her to faith the most at this time.
My parents moved from a church with hardly any young people when we were teenagers to a church with a good youth program for us. If theres one with a good youth leader and program that is positively encouraging youth toward faith in Jesus go there.

 

[hislegacy]

Calvary Chapel is like taking a shower with your socks on. Something's just not right, from the head down.

If your visiting new churches, go for at least three months to get a total opinion first

You will never find a perfect one, based on what you like, because our perceptions are skewed.

 

[RDKirk]

Calvary Chapel is like taking a shower with your socks on. Something's just not right, from the head down.

The Holy Spirit would put a definite spike in "wrong" and you'd know precisely what it was.

Otherwise, it's just "feelings." I used to "feel" the same way about a church with a white pastor, until the Holy Spirit put a spike into those "feelings."

 

[rdclmn72]

Give yourself some time to look around, and consider the local church as an option, you will have links to your local community, your family will have friends within reach and well, it just might grow on you.

 

[hislegacy]

The Holy Spirit would put a definite spike in "wrong" and you'd know precisely what it was.

Otherwise, it's just "feelings." I used to "feel" the same way about a church with a white pastor, until the Holy Spirit put a spike into those "feelings."

Sometimes He does and sometimes a nudge is enought.

Acts 15:25
it seemed good to us, being assembled with one accord, to send chosen men to you with our beloved Barnabas and Paul,

Acts 15:28
For it seemed good to the Holy Spirit, and to us, to lay upon you no greater burden than these necessary things

Acts 15:34
However, it seemed good to Silas to remain there.


Notice, they did things because it seemed good.

Sometimes you can go in a place and it seems wrong.

 

[FerventDisciple]

Thanks for all the advice y'all, really did help. We've decided to keep going with CC and will get our daughter involved with the youth this Sunday and see how it progresses there. Her needs are what is most important to us right now. As pointed out there's no reason to not go there and nothing specifically wrong.

I know God gives me discernment to see certain things but at times I think I let that turn into a critical spirit which clouds it when I get like that. I'll always defend my doctrinal convictions but I know I need to mature in this area for sure.

 

[ByTheSpirit]

Thanks for all the advice y'all, really did help. We've decided to keep going with CC and will get our daughter involved with the youth this Sunday and see how it progresses there. Her needs are what is most important to us right now. As pointed out there's no reason to not go there and nothing specifically wrong.

I know God gives me discernment to see certain things but at times I think I let that turn into a critical spirit which clouds it when I get like that. I'll always defend my doctrinal convictions but I know I need to mature in this area for sure.

I don't agree with all the teaching in my house fellowship, but what helps me is just to remember I could be wrong and what is important is the fellowship of saints together. I pray all the time that God's truth is revealed, not mine and not the elders, but God's. And with that, that we are all humble enough to listen and not reject it when it comes. For it may well be that we are all wrong.

 

[AbbaLove]

I know God gives me discernment to see certain things but at times I think I let that turn into a critical spirit which clouds it when I get like that. I'll always defend my doctrinal convictions but I know I need to mature in this area for sure.

It's especially important that your wife and children hear positive words of encouragement coming from you (before and after church). Ten years, five years and even one year from now the formed "doctrinal" convictions will become tailored in His Loving~Kindness to fit comfortably within the Body of Christ.

1 Corinthians 1:17-20 NKJV
17 For Christ did not send me to baptize, but to preach the gospel, not with wisdom of words, lest the cross of Christ should be made of no effect.
18 For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.
19 For it is written:

“I will destroy the wisdom of the wise,
And bring to nothing the understanding of the prudent.”​

20 Where is the wise? Where is the scribe? Where is the disputer of this age? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of this world?

Proverbs 3:3-6 NASB
3 Do not let kindness and truth leave you;
Bind them around your neck,
Write them on the tablet of your heart.
4 So you will find favor and good repute
In the sight of God and man.
5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart
And do not lean on your own understanding.
6 In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He will make your paths straight.

Attending Church is an adventure learning how to walk in His Love​