Seriously... Is there anybody at all to date in the Orthodox Church?

[Bible Highlighter]

No. I don't think anything is worth joining Facebook, lol

I agree. Facebook and Twitter are really bad - IMO.
People have lost their jobs, and ruined their families because of them.
Having friends becomes digitized rather than simply meeting with them in person.
Kids today can get hooked into these social media platforms and waste whole days and weeks of their precious youth instead fo going outside to play like normal children used to do. Facebook and Twitter also censor Christian content sometimes, as well.

 

[Hermit76]

@Xenophon

Not that there is not legit Christian Russian women in Russia, but I did not consider any women from that country because of the difficulty of that government, and for the fact that there are a lot of obvious scammer type profiles I noticed from that country on dating sites I was looking at in the past. From reading up on the difficulties of dating Russian women: Russian women can also be very demanding and a little cold emotionally before you get to know them (after a long time). But dating scams from Russia are very real.

This book is based on a true story:

https://www.amazon.com/Warning-Russian-Dating-Behind-Deception/dp/1452066868

So if I was in your shoes, I would date Christian women in more trusted countries that are not known for dating scams. Avoid the Philippines, Africa, Russia, and UK.

Brazilians appear to be more open emotionally. They will kiss you in public (if you are comfortable with that). Brazilians are more family oriented, and they are very friendly and affectionate. But again, pray about it. Wait upon the Lord. It took two decades of prayer before God answered for me in finding my soulmate. Do not rush (Russian) into anything.

Ummm... You are in the Orthodox Forum. Many of us are not Russian ethnically but our churches are. You have people on here that are Russian and currently living there. No one was suggesting a mail order bride type situation but a relationship within the context of The Church. Perhaps you should rethink your post.

 

[Bible Highlighter]

Ummm... You are in the Orthodox Forum. Many of us are not Russian ethnically but our churches are. You have people on here that are Russian and currently living there. No one was suggesting a mail order bride type situation but a relationship within the context of The Church. Perhaps you should rethink your post.

I am only sharing my experience and wisdom.
It's just advice. They can take it or leave it.
I like to play things safer. Maybe they are not that way.
I don't know. All I can do is give advice in what I feel is best.

Side Note:

Nowhere did I speak against the Orthodox church in this thread. I am only highly recommending in not going to Russia for safety reasons, and because Russian is known for dating scams. A few may have been blessed in finding a Russian Christian bride. I just think it just a little risky. But that is just my opinion and advice. They can take it or leave it.

May God bless you.

 

[truefiction1]

I've been in the church for a few years. I'm financially stable, educated, and active in the Church. I would like to be married, but there are no unmarried Orthodox women near my age around. Two dozen young converts here, but not a single female among them.

I've tried orthodox dating sites and usually after the second or third message, she'll become unresponsive for no discernable reason... you'd think someone would have the courtesy to say, "actually, no, I don't care to talk to you anymore."

And the one time someone really talked with me, after a few months I ended up driving out a few states away to see her - but she stood me up. I spent the day in that nice little town going to various thrift stores, because I might as well use my vacation time the best I could since I was already there.

So, I feel like I've done right by at least attempting to find orthodox women.

I don't really have a social circle outside the Church, but maybe it's time. But then again, it's like, 'don't get yoked to those who don't believe the same.' So, should I? (yeah, yeah, ask my priest.)

These days it seems that Orthodox men are meeting heterodox women who are being catechized and then received into the Church prior to being married. I won't get into the reason for the lack of young women in our parishes. That would be a different discussion altogether, and not a very pleasant one for me to engage in.

 

[Xenophon]

These days it seems that Orthodox men are meeting heterodox women who are being catechized and then received into the Church prior to being married. I won't get into the reason for the lack of young women in our parishes. That would be a different discussion altogether, and not a very pleasant one for me to engage in.

But it is something I'm curious about, but not if it causes unpleasantness.

 

[truefiction1]

But it is something I'm curious about, but not if it causes unpleasantness.

It is because we have failed, on account of our own apostasies, to provide them with a proper spiritual environment in which they could truly fall in Love with the Lord. Thus, when assailed by the various false and antichrist philosophies which have engulfed our popular culture, they have no solid foundation on which to remain planted in our faith, so they have either left altogether or are otherwise not engaged in the spiritual life of Orthodox Christianity, even if they are in attendance in the parish. All of my sisters and my daughters have left the faith. They never really received the faith to begin with. I am to be blamed to a great extent for my daughters, though others also are to blame. But my own apostasy was greater than anyone else's, because I had received much, so my sin is greater. Still, many others have not fared better, so most girls and many boys are being swallowed up by the world. This is especially true of the Orthodox, because ours is a faith whose greatest treasure is our Liturgy, which is our emphasis. Without the mystical spiritual encounter of God, however, the Liturgy is merely deaf, blind, and dead ritual. But God can only be encountered in Liturgy by those who take up their own crosses of self denial. We do not practice this level of self denial in America. We are fit only for cozy discussions about Othodoxy and festivals, barbecue fundraisers or perogi making and such. The girls leave, as do many boys, because they never once came face to face with the glorious and unspeakable mystery of the Love of God which is to be discovered in His real presence in the Holy Mysteries (Eucharist). Our parents succumbed to the temptation prevalent in our culture, and most bishops and priests as well, and so did we, and now our children's generation even more so. Soon there maybe no one left to keep my parish open. There maybe some localities where the faith is flourishing. Not where I am though.

As I said, it truly pains me to think and talk about this. I want to be angry with them for the way they are. But I was no better and am even to be blamed for what has become of them. I'm sure to give an account.

 

[buzuxi02]

I don't really have a social circle outside the Church, but maybe it's time. But then again, it's like, 'don't get yoked to those who don't believe the same.' So, should I? (yeah, yeah, ask my priest.)

You should try to connect with the available women in your midst. Which are the Local women of your town or city, it's irrelevant whether they are Orthodox (or even Christian). You don't live in some majority Orthodox country with a large pool of candidates and most are secularized anyway. Meaning it's a good chance you will still be unequally yoked. We no longer live in a cohesive and monolithic culture where we can assume with certainty the yoking will be equal just because of a common religious affiliation.

As long as she respects your beliefs and is willing to raise offspring in a Christian manner you are 90% there.

 

[buzuxi02]

. So, is it because Orthodox women are all from higher societal classes? Is lower middle class too low for them?

Orthodox women are spoiled. Their immigrant parents generation is beneath them. Remember these Balkan and east European immigrants all came here to make LOTS of money and move up in status. It's ingrained in their offspring not to take a step backwards.

 

[bèlla]

Low wages can be problematic across the board. Irrespective of denomination or belief. It may be of special concern for women desiring the option to remain home with young children. If she earns more its equally concerning. Few can accept the breadwinning role without compromise.

Yours in His Service,

~Bella

 

[Justin-H.S.]

Orthodox women are spoiled. Their immigrant parents generation is beneath them. Remember these Balkan and east European immigrants all came here to make LOTS of money and move up in status. It's ingrained in their offspring not to take a step backwards.

A very small minority of (second generation and on) cradle Orthodox seem to take the faith seriously, but I don't know. I can't judge their heart. I think we're living in unprecedented times when many....issues (that are taken for granted by many) are coming to light (being revealed as deficient) and remaining in darkness now becomes a choice. But, it's not just the Orthodox that are not taking faith seriously. I think this lack of zeal goes across the board in Western Christianity as well. Lots of Protestants just go through the motions, or rather they seem like they're just going through the motions. Again, we can't judge their heart. I think we will be seeing a revival of Christianity soon, but I doubt it will come until Abortion is severely curtailed.

 

[Hermit76]

A very small minority of (second generation and on) cradle Orthodox seem to take the faith seriously, but I don't know. I can't judge their heart. I think we're living in unprecedented times when many....issues (that are taken for granted by many) are coming to light (being revealed as deficient) and remaining in darkness now becomes a choice. But, it's not just the Orthodox that are not taking faith seriously. I think this lack of zeal goes across the board in Western Christianity as well. Lots of Protestants just go through the motions, or rather they seem like they're just going through the motions. Again, we can't judge their heart. I think we will be seeing a revival of Christianity soon, but I doubt it won't come until Abortion is severely curtailed.

It's the segmentation of faith into just another category of life.

 

[Knee V]

Perhaps visit a monastery and tell the abbott that you are seeking a wife. You might be surprised at how common that is and how many connections he has to help you.

 

[ArmyMatt]

Perhaps visit a monastery and tell the abbott that you are seeking a wife. You might be surprised at how common that is and how many connections he has to help you.

abbesses too. there was an abbess who definitely had a hand in my wife and I getting together.

 

[rusmeister]

It's the segmentation of faith into just another category of life.

Which is directly connected to our education system which segments, or fragments, all understandings. The idea of the PhD used to admit that education taken to its end (goal) should lead to a single world view that unites all knowledge in an understanding of truth. Thus, religion is seen as an optional segment of our lives, rather than a thing that should enlighten and unify every aspect of it.

 

[Xenophon]

Orthodox women are spoiled. Their immigrant parents generation is beneath them. Remember these Balkan and east European immigrants all came here to make LOTS of money and move up in status. It's ingrained in their offspring not to take a step backwards.

The funny thing is that I do make more money compared to most my age and I have significantly less overhead. It's just status perception.

It may be of special concern for women desiring the option to remain home with young children.

I've got that covered. I've been making enough to do so since I was 23, not including what I make from being a landlord, and side-work. Outside of the rough patch of the last few months - but I've mostly bounced back.


Now, if they want an HBO/TV lifestyle, nobody can afford that without a 6 digit salary. And I think it's more that than the right desire to be a stay-at-home mom. But I don't find such TV-life women attractive anyway.

 

[Xenophon]

As long as she respects your beliefs and is willing to raise offspring in a Christian manner you are 90% there.

I'm not so sure about that. I've seen a lot of carnage.

 

[Xenophon]

It is because we have failed, on account of our own apostasies, to provide them with a proper spiritual environment in which they could truly fall in Love with the Lord...

As I said, it truly pains me to think and talk about this. I want to be angry with them for the way they are. But I was no better and am even to be blamed for what has become of them. I'm sure to give an account.

I would say, from my experience, that most converts I know have come to the church (and the RCC to some degree) in part because of the protection which exists in the moral dogma surrounding relationships - especially the women who have converted who are in a worse position in all the wrong which occurs (it was a woman who pointed this out to me, but I recognized it in myself and in others since then.)

I do find a lot of resentment and anger over what I've seen in the Church and among those who'd spurn the protection of moral good.

 

[buzuxi02]

The funny thing is that I do make more money compared to most my age and I have significantly less overhead. It's just status perception.

Absolutely. I know this 1st generation american Greek of Cypriot descent. She hit 42 and still single. She insists any potential husband has a minimum of a master's degree (not sure why a bachelor's won't do). At her age she is still pretty so her expectations have not been tempered in fact she has gotten much pickier! Now any potential prospect can only be 2 to 3 years older than her max, but preferably younger!. Of course the men she's looking for all can attain brides much younger than her but this doesn't seem to click with her. This mentality is being played out all over.

 

[ArmyMatt]

Which is directly connected to our education system which segments, or fragments, all understandings. The idea of the PhD used to admit that education taken to its end (goal) should lead to a single world view that unites all knowledge in an understanding of truth. Thus, religion is seen as an optional segment of our lives, rather than a thing that should enlighten and unify every aspect of it.

this was what Fr Alexander Schmemann said was the great danger of secularism. the idea that we can separate the holy from the profane, rather than transfigure the profane to become holy.

 

[bèlla]

Now, if they want an HBO/TV lifestyle, nobody can afford that without a 6 digit salary. And I think it's more that than the right desire to be a stay-at-home mom. But I don't find such TV-life women attractive anyway.

It's all relative. If a person desires a certain status let them pursue it. You'll be miserable and they'll never be satisfied. Six figures isn't a lot of money. If that's the scale the same holds true. Get someone who values you as-is. If it takes longer to find so be it. You'll save yourself a heap of headaches in the long run.

Yours in His Service,

~Bella