Seeing myself as part of a spiritual relay team

[Godlovesmetwo]

As my father handed the baton over to me and all the other baby boomers in my family.
I think my father's leg was particularly impressive. Gains were made in humility and familial love. Trials were faced head on. My father really showed the way in how to be a good family man, a sober man and a reliable breadwinner, he made time for us. We all felt special. We all felt loved, even if some of my siblings doubted his leadership ability in secular wisdom.
My turn at the baton has been less convincing. I sped off and started with some gusto but got bogged down with mental health issues. Even as I say that now, I feel I am making excuses. My father would never make such an excuse. He manned up, in his own gentle way. I have shown potential on the curve, but on straightening up, others have shown more determination, dug deeper as I chose to slow down and ponder my future midrace. Oh no! I did show some interest in spiritual matters on a philosophical level. They just didn't transfer much in real terms.
Having no kids, who will I hand the baton over to?

 

[Ana the Ist]

As my father handed the baton over to me and all the other baby boomers in my family.
I think my father's leg was particularly impressive. Gains were made in humility and familial love. Trials were faced head on. My father really showed the way in how to be a good family man, a sober man and a reliable breadwinner, he made time for us. We all felt special. We all felt loved, even if some of my siblings doubted his leadership ability in secular wisdom.
My turn at the baton has been less convincing. I sped off and started with some gusto but got bogged down with mental health issues. Even as I say that now, I feel I am making excuses. My father would never make such an excuse. He manned up, in his own gentle way. I have shown potential on the curve, but on straightening up, others have shown more determination, dug deeper as I chose to slow down and ponder my future midrace. Oh no! I did show some interest in spiritual matters on a philosophical level. They just didn't transfer much in real terms.
Having no kids, who will I hand the baton over to?

If you feel the need to pass on some life experience, knowledge, or wisdom...there are plenty of kids out there who can use a teacher, tutor, or big brother (as in the "big brothers/big sisters programs"). I understand that you may think of teaching as a career that you need a degree or certification for...but really anything that you're exceptionally talented at could be a teaching opportunity. Things like chess, playing the piano, tennis...all could open up opportunities for you to mentor someone who needs that kind of relationship with a father figure...and open up opportunities for you to share what you know.

Also, don't discount the mental issues you've faced as something small. I don't think most people realize just how difficult a genuine mental health issue can be and how much it can interfere with otherwise normal thinking. A lot of people can find themselves in utter disarray just by facing some unexpected stress in their life...so more serious mental issues can be completely debilitating.

Finally, try not to compare yourself to your father too much...you're probably more like him than you realize. I too was fortunate enough to have a rock solid, even tempered, loving and wise father. Even now, I can look back and be impressed at how well he handled adversity and stress without even the slightest hint that it got to him. I once remarked to my wife that he felt like an impossible example of a man to live up to...and she replied with "Are you serious? You're just like him...nothing gets to you. I've never known anyone who handles problems as easily as you do."

We all end up with some of our fathers reflected in us.

 

[Godlovesmetwo]

If you feel the need to pass on some life experience, knowledge, or wisdom...there are plenty of kids out there who can use a teacher, tutor, or big brother (as in the "big brothers/big sisters programs"). I understand that you may think of teaching as a career that you need a degree or certification for...but really anything that you're exceptionally talented at could be a teaching opportunity. Things like chess, playing the piano, tennis...all could open up opportunities for you to mentor someone who needs that kind of relationship with a father figure...and open up opportunities for you to share what you know.

Also, don't discount the mental issues you've faced as something small. I don't think most people realize just how difficult a genuine mental health issue can be and how much it can interfere with otherwise normal thinking. A lot of people can find themselves in utter disarray just by facing some unexpected stress in their life...so more serious mental issues can be completely debilitating.

Finally, try not to compare yourself to your father too much...you're probably more like him than you realize. I too was fortunate enough to have a rock solid, even tempered, loving and wise father. Even now, I can look back and be impressed at how well he handled adversity and stress without even the slightest hint that it got to him. I once remarked to my wife that he felt like an impossible example of a man to live up to...and she replied with "Are you serious? You're just like him...nothing gets to you. I've never known anyone who handles problems as easily as you do."

We all end up with some of our fathers reflected in us.

Nice post Ana. really thoughtful and helpful too.Every time I compare myself to my father I come up short. So I'd better stop doing it. I don't think my father was appreciated as much until he died. He was kind of foolish in worldly matters, bad investments etcetera, but just the heart of a saint!
Thanks again for the encouragement.

 

[4x4toy]

Nice post Ana. really thoughtful and helpful too.Every time I compare myself to my father I come up short. So I'd better stop doing it. I don't think my father was appreciated as much until he died. He was kind of foolish in worldly matters, bad investments etcetera, but just the heart of a saint!
Thanks again for the encouragement.

Hi Paul, Don't sell yourself short, every one could use a dose of humility that you show .. You bring honor to your father