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[meesemouse]

Hi
I don't know why I am on this planet, and can't seem to find any semblance of purpose. I'm so confused and lost and sad. Not trying to be a downer. I guess that's why I'm here. I want to find answers. I don't want to keep living this miserable life of emotional tumult that consumes me. I want to find solace and connection in God but I don't feel like I will ever be capable of this.
I am not opposed to the idea of religion, but I struggle with the stigmas that surround it. I have had to go to church since I was younger and while I didn't mind going (it is a wonderful community of people), I failed to see any value in it, and I never saw how any of it could improve my relationship with God.
Due to this apathy towards the deeper meaning of religion and attending church, I viewed myself as a pretty staunch atheist up until late. However, the true purposeless of life in atheism has hit me and it made me question how people find joy and meaning of life. I want to find joy and meaning in life, so this unsettling realization has pressed me to look elsewhere.
I also have a wonderful English teacher who is also partially responsible for my search for purpose. He introduced me to a band called The Chariot two years ago. They are this amazing Christian metal band that shocked me to my core. I was fascinated by their lyrics, intrigued by their passion, and stunned by the idea that this crazy music was a form of honest worship of the Christian God. Ever since then, I've talked to this teacher closely and he's provided me with a new view of Christianity that I never took the time to realize. That Christianity was not just about showing up every Sunday and going through the motions but about building a personal relationship with God.
It has taken me time to realize that I am truly tired of the loneliness and emptiness of atheism, yet I am scared, and I struggle with where to begin on understanding Christianity.
I don't know if I'll be on here often or not. Honestly, I don't know if this message is just some crazy impulsive message in a bottle to an ultimately purposeless existence, but I want to give hope and faith a try.
If you just managed to get through the mess that my existence is, thank you. I appreciate it. I hope you have a wonderful day.

 

[“Paisios”]

Welcome to CF. I hope you will find here fellowship and friendship and answers to your questions.

I found Christ on a lakeshore when I was at my lowest around your age before I developed any interest in religion. Religion helped me to understand He Who I had already met. I guess I would say to first try to quiet your inward thoughts and humbly and sincerely ask God to make Himself known to you. (Look for a quiet reply...seems to be more common than big, flashy Apostle Paul type conversions).

May you find what you need.

 

[Silmarien]

It has taken me time to realize that I am truly tired of the loneliness and emptiness of atheism, yet I am scared, and I struggle with where to begin on understanding Christianity.

Start with C.S. Lewis and Mere Christianity. Plenty of us who get lured away from disbelief have him to thank for it.

Anyway, welcome, and good luck!

 

[Shadow]

Hi
I don't know why I am on this planet, and can't seem to find any semblance of purpose. I'm so confused and lost and sad. Not trying to be a downer. I guess that's why I'm here. I want to find answers. I don't want to keep living this miserable life of emotional tumult that consumes me. I want to find solace and connection in God but I don't feel like I will ever be capable of this.
I am not opposed to the idea of religion, but I struggle with the stigmas that surround it. I have had to go to church since I was younger and while I didn't mind going (it is a wonderful community of people), I failed to see any value in it, and I never saw how any of it could improve my relationship with God.
Due to this apathy towards the deeper meaning of religion and attending church, I viewed myself as a pretty staunch atheist up until late. However, the true purposeless of life in atheism has hit me and it made me question how people find joy and meaning of life. I want to find joy and meaning in life, so this unsettling realization has pressed me to look elsewhere.
I also have a wonderful English teacher who is also partially responsible for my search for purpose. He introduced me to a band called The Chariot two years ago. They are this amazing Christian metal band that shocked me to my core. I was fascinated by their lyrics, intrigued by their passion, and stunned by the idea that this crazy music was a form of honest worship of the Christian God. Ever since then, I've talked to this teacher closely and he's provided me with a new view of Christianity that I never took the time to realize. That Christianity was not just about showing up every Sunday and going through the motions but about building a personal relationship with God.
It has taken me time to realize that I am truly tired of the loneliness and emptiness of atheism, yet I am scared, and I struggle with where to begin on understanding Christianity.
I don't know if I'll be on here often or not. Honestly, I don't know if this message is just some crazy impulsive message in a bottle to an ultimately purposeless existence, but I want to give hope and faith a try.
If you just managed to get through the mess that my existence is, thank you. I appreciate it. I hope you have a wonderful day.

Hey there @meesemouse, I'm sorry to hear of your bad experiences with atheism and I can fully relate to them. I hope being on Christian Forums can help you find the meaning and purpose in life you are looking for.

 

[Sarah G]

Welcome to CF. I am lighting a candle for you and praying that the love and light of Lord Jesus Christ meet you at your place of suffering and the Holy Spirit guide you to peace and contentment

 

[Little Lantern]

Greetings, and welcome to CF, @meesemouse. May you find godly encouragement, warm fellowship, and engaging discussion here as you search for Truth. May God bless you and open your eyes to Who He is, and may He give you understanding of the wonderful abundant life in Him through Christ Jesus. And God bless your English teacher.

 

[2PhiloVoid]

Hi
I don't know why I am on this planet, and can't seem to find any semblance of purpose. I'm so confused and lost and sad. Not trying to be a downer. I guess that's why I'm here. I want to find answers. I don't want to keep living this miserable life of emotional tumult that consumes me. I want to find solace and connection in God but I don't feel like I will ever be capable of this.
I am not opposed to the idea of religion, but I struggle with the stigmas that surround it. I have had to go to church since I was younger and while I didn't mind going (it is a wonderful community of people), I failed to see any value in it, and I never saw how any of it could improve my relationship with God.
Due to this apathy towards the deeper meaning of religion and attending church, I viewed myself as a pretty staunch atheist up until late. However, the true purposeless of life in atheism has hit me and it made me question how people find joy and meaning of life. I want to find joy and meaning in life, so this unsettling realization has pressed me to look elsewhere.
I also have a wonderful English teacher who is also partially responsible for my search for purpose. He introduced me to a band called The Chariot two years ago. They are this amazing Christian metal band that shocked me to my core. I was fascinated by their lyrics, intrigued by their passion, and stunned by the idea that this crazy music was a form of honest worship of the Christian God. Ever since then, I've talked to this teacher closely and he's provided me with a new view of Christianity that I never took the time to realize. That Christianity was not just about showing up every Sunday and going through the motions but about building a personal relationship with God.
It has taken me time to realize that I am truly tired of the loneliness and emptiness of atheism, yet I am scared, and I struggle with where to begin on understanding Christianity.
I don't know if I'll be on here often or not. Honestly, I don't know if this message is just some crazy impulsive message in a bottle to an ultimately purposeless existence, but I want to give hope and faith a try.
If you just managed to get through the mess that my existence is, thank you. I appreciate it. I hope you have a wonderful day.

...I'd say a lot of what you're feeling comes by our recognition of 'the gift of mortality'--the gift that just keeps on giving. And taking. So, it's natural for feelings about our existence come oozing out every now and then, despite the ongoing lack of Christmas cheer expressed by and among hardcore atheists.

Anyway, just take it all one day at a time and try to explore the possibilities in Christ...

Peace,
2PhiloVoid

 

[Fumbling_Foo]

Welcome to the forums, meesemouse .

A couple of resources as food for thought are:

The Meaning of Life (Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy)
and Rick Warren's "The Purpose Driven Life" (This book's philosophy is based on the Bible)

I feel that my own opinion on life's meaning may help, as I was once an agnostic / spiritual but non-christian. I've recently come back to Christianity because its precepts push me the most to know and grow closer to God and seek fellowship with mankind. (But, I'm still only about 95% accepting the "Nicene Creed" at this point).

I ascribe to the camp that believes both an eternal soul and the existence of God are necessary for meaning in life. After all, what's the point of life if after all you do in life is forgotten for the rest of eternity to the annihilation of the self and the universe through death and entropy. It seems absurd to me for feeling, thinking, experiencing conscious agents possessing the sense of "I am" to not have a soul or inhabit a Godless universe (God would have to be the one that creates the immaterial soul). If we were all biological robots without a sense of consciousness and being, then it would be reasonable for the universe to be Godless. Hope this helps, blessings .

 

[drjean]

Oh you've come to a good place in your life! God responds to all who seek Him! Until you accept Jesus' love and payment for your sin (by giving Himself as a perfect sacrifice upon the cross and overpowering death and hell by His resurrection) you cannot know the full glory and peace that only HE can give us.

Religion is man made and can disappoint us greatly at times. But FAITH in Christ is where it's at...

 

[meesemouse]

@drjean @Fumbling_Foo @2PhiloVoid @Little Lantern @Sarah G @Red Economist Thank you all so much. The kind words mean a lot more than you may think.

I also appreciate the book reccomendation @Silmarien as I am currently reading "Making Sense of God" by Timothy Keller (which is absolutely amazing) and I can't wait to read other books on faith. Books are really nice because they provide a definitive means of grounding myself, slowing down, and providing a peaceful medium for me to absorb ideas on these paramount questions of life that are often times unsettling and frightening to deal with.

I found Christ on a lakeshore when I was at my lowest around your age before I developed any interest in religion. Religion helped me to understand He Who I had already met. I guess I would say to first try to quiet your inward thoughts and humbly and sincerely ask God to make Himself known to you. (Look for a quiet reply...seems to be more common than big, flashy Apostle Paul type conversions).

May you find what you need.

Finally, I really struck a chord with your words @Shoetoyou. While a grandiose sign would be convenient, life doesn't always work that way. I do hope to seek answers though, and though it's not easy, I hope to continue forward humbly and sincerely. Kind of reminds me of Acts 17:26-27.

Thanks again.

 

[Silmarien]

I also appreciate the book reccomendation @Silmarien as I am currently reading "Making Sense of God" by Timothy Keller (which is absolutely amazing) and I can't wait to read other books on faith.

In that case, a couple of other recommendations I would make:

N.T. Wright, particularly Simply Christian.
David Bentley Hart's The Experience of God.