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Scared

Discussion in 'Christian Advice' started by blueberribear88, Jun 26, 2019.

  1. blueberribear88

    blueberribear88 Member

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    I'm 30 years old, been talking to this guy for 5 months. He's 42 and a Christian. Recently I just found out I'm pregnant. It will be my first. I've been feeling so angry about it. I had plans to join the Air Force in a few months and now I'm just confused about everything. I just don't know how I'm able to raise a baby right now
     
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  2. Brightmoon

    Brightmoon Apes and humans are all in family Hominidae.

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    Whatever you decide make sure it’s your Decision about your body and your life.
     
  3. Gracia Singh

    Gracia Singh Newbie Supporter

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    Who is the father?
     
  4. d taylor

    d taylor Well-Known Member

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    That decision was made before she became pregnant, now it should be up to God if that child is to live. It is still her body and life but there is now, the growing body of another person there.
     
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  5. MasterYourLife

    MasterYourLife New Member

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    So she can kill herself, because it's her body?
    What kind of foolish logic is that.
     
  6. Brightmoon

    Brightmoon Apes and humans are all in family Hominidae.

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    . Who said anything about killing herself ? What you said wasn’t logical
     
  7. Monk Brendan

    Monk Brendan Well-Known Member Supporter

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    But don't forget the unborn child is someone else's body and life.
     
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  8. MasterYourLife

    MasterYourLife New Member

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    She said she doesn't know how she can raise the baby.
    You replied with it being her decision about her body. Implying she can have an abortion, because it's "her body".
    So if it's her body, she can kill herself and that makes it okay?
     
  9. Monk Brendan

    Monk Brendan Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Have you ever heard of adoption?

    And have you told the father?
     
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  10. Mel333

    Mel333 Active Member

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    It's going to be okay. Sometimes our plans and being in control of our life doesn't go to plan but it definitely is a shock when our plans don't go to plan.

    Would the father of the child be able to help you raise the baby?
    Perhaps you could find a part-time job instead? Maybe you weren't meant to join the air force just yet.

    I think this child could be a blessing in disguise, even though it might not feel like it right now.... I do hope you keep it.
     
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  11. Brightmoon

    Brightmoon Apes and humans are all in family Hominidae.

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    the only thing I said was that it was her life , her body and her decision . YOU implied that I told her to get an abortion. I SAID it was HER decision.
     
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  12. SarahsKnight

    SarahsKnight Jesus Christ is this Knight's truth. Supporter

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    Can we not turn this into an argument about abortion? Save that crap for the politics section. This is about @blueberribear88 feeling afraid right now and in need of support.



    I know it must be scary right now, BerriBear, for a number of reasons. I am not a woman myself so I cannot know what it is like. But I encourage you to hang in there and go through with carrying the child if doing so does not pose a serious medical threat. And to please ask the man you were seeing for all support. You have not said either way, but I certainly hope he is still around and not bailed on you. I know it is not much, but I will pray that God makes your way to labor as light upon you physically and emotionally as possible, and that you have the means to raise him/her well.

    As for your desire to join the Air Force, while it will certainly not be easy to continue following that path, who says that becoming a mother must be a permanent barricade to your career aspirations? It may be delayed, but you never know if God will or will not open the door back up for you later down the road.
     
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  13. Blade

    Blade Veteran Supporter

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    blueberribear88.... know you dont answer to man. And the the one that loves you most... the truth is .. He does not will not judge you nor condemn you.

    So many times we fail to understand HE IS GOD! As He told Sarah.. what is to hard for the lord? Fear is not of God.. Fear will cause us to not listen.. and make wrong choices. NOTHING is impossible with God.. thats not a nice cute saying.. JESUS is real. And can make ANYTHING happen.. all for his glory. You dont have to give up on ANYTHING! Ask Him to show you.. He loves you...

    What makes it work is TRUST aka faith. As long as we drive.. He has to just sit and watch.. As the song says.. Jesus.. take the wheel. He WILL turn this into something you never knew could happen! He LOVES to do this for His Children... its not based on how GOOD you are.. were all the same there.

    I have always been like this since I was a kid.. my God is in no box.. we get stuck.. we only see one path.. yet.. let go let Him take over.. the paths are endless. blueberribear88.. your FATHER IS A GOD! And your not some slave..... go out side.. look up.. look around. ALL THAT was made for YOU! He thought of YOU when He made it! And no matter how far we fall what sin we did. There is a cost for sin in this world. He NEVER STOPS helping.. loving caring.. you FATHER IS GOD! Your His daughter! What would the perfect dad do? Amp that up a billion more times and still does not come close to what your Father can do.

    Read that bible.. as a child.. then just BELIEVE! Yes.. most dont do this. We walk by faith.. to many walk by what they see. What they hear how they feel. You keep pressing in. No matter how you feel. You have to KNOW what ever you ask the Father when you pray.. He knew it before you asked.. you have to TRUST have faith that what you ask.. HE WILL DO! Why? He said He would. What ever YOU ask the Father in my name (Jesus) He will do it. What ever you ask me I will do it.. what ever you desire when you pray believe you receive it you will have it. if you know He hears you then you know you have the petitions you asked for.. for His WILL? Its HIS WORD! We ask according to His word.

    And what you desire does not go against His word! So.. not all sold out to Jesus? On the wrong path? Then repent.. ask Him to put you on right path.. DONE! Jesus is so real. We must make the choice.. to follow Him. We can listen to man and get more confused. Or.. read His word.. talk to Him.. no matter where you are in Christ.. He has NEVER left you.. He does not judge you.. nor condemn you. He is NOT against you..no matter what you did or do. You have no better friend.. or best friend.. or brother.. He is.. your friend you best friend you brother your savior your GOD! So.. we fall.. we say sorry.. repent.. dust off keep going. But ..its HIS peace.. His joy...His strength.. His armor. That is all over you..

    Its going to be ok. I promise. Like the song Just be held.. Casting Crowns.. playing now. What are the odds huh. Play the song.. And read Isa 41 10..it was written for you
     
  14. St_Worm2

    St_Worm2 Senior Member Supporter

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    Hi Blueberribear88, praying for you, and your baby, and for all that's going on in your life right now. Please keep us updated if you have the time to do so.

    Do you attend church, or are you planning to sometime soon by any chance? If so, I would recommend making an appointment to see your pastor as soon as you can, for his counsel about all you are going through right now, and so he can know how to begin to pray for you. Our pastors are pretty good about giving us sound advice, praying for us, and helping us when we are in need (in fact, they normally love to do so, and the Lord called them to do so, to keep a close watch over us/over our souls as we pass through this life .. Hebrews 13:17).

    Question, in your opening sentence, you mentioned a 42 yr old Christian man who you've been talking to for the last 5 months. How does he figure into all of this (if you don't mind me asking, that is)?

    Thanks!

    God bless you!!

    --David
    p.s. - Melody Green is singer/songwriter Keith Green's wife, and I like what she had to say recently to mothers about their unborn children, so I thought I'd leave what she said here for you.

    "A baby is cradled / carried in the womb of it's mother, to grow and be nurtured until birth. Each baby is a wholly separate person from it's mother: With different DNA, different fingerprints, with possibly a different blood type or the opposite sex. The baby is a person living within a person and not "the mother's body". The mom is appointed to care for the separate life she carries within her and once it's born, find a home for her baby, if she can't provide one." -- Melody Green
    .
     
    Last edited: Jun 27, 2019
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  15. SPF

    SPF Well-Known Member

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    I can only imagine how much emotional turmoil you're going through right now. I know this was not the plan for your life that you envisioned. Not in the least.

    I think what you need to do at this point is spend as much time as you can, as often as you can - meditating, praying, and seeking the Lord. Honestly, this is one of those few moments in life that have an absolute gigantic impact upon your future. It really does. The way you work through this situation, the decisions you make, the direction you choose to go is going to have such a huge impact on your future. And most of all - it's going to demonstrate the level of faith you place in Christ.

    I'm going to share some Truth with you if that's OK.

    Isaiah 58:11 - The LORD will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.

    The Truth is that God is real, and if you are a Believer, then you do have the Holy Spirit inside of you. He wants to guide you, He wants to help you grow in the knowledge of Him, and He wants to show you how to live a life that most glorifies God.

    This is one of those times in life where you need to literally ask yourself what your purpose in life is. Why do you exist? Does God have something specific for you?

    Proverbs 16:9 - The mind of man plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.

    We make a lot of plans. I make a lot of plans. But when we do, it's important that we submit them to God and ask Him to help guide us. How much have you prayed about joining the Air Force? How confident are you that God wants you there? Is it possible that this pregnancy is literally a sign from God that He wants something different for you?

    What do you believe about God? Do you believe He wants you to join the Air Force and so this pregnancy is a test of that resolve and that He therefore wants you to abort and kill the unborn child? Or do you think that maybe the Air Force isn't what God has in store for you and now he's showing you a different path? What do you believe about God? Who is in charge of your life - you or God?

    Romans 12:1 - Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship.

    Let's be honest - you messed up. You shouldn't have slept with the man who isn't your husband. And you shouldn't have gotten pregnant. But here's the great thing about the God we serve - He's full of forgiveness. He can take all our messed up situations and use them for His glory. So the question I would have for you is how are you going to live in light of your sin? I would hope that you choose to turn to Christ, that you would choose to do exactly as Paul says and offer your body as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God.

    Your life has potentially changed forever. It's scary. But God does well with scary. God does well with emotions. God does well with us. Trust in Him.

    My hope would be that you would turn into an amazing mother from this experience. But if that's not the case, as a foster parent and someone very involved with families that want to adopt - I can tell you that there is a waiting line of parents that would adopt your baby out of the hospital.

    I will be praying for you.
     
  16. blueberribear88

    blueberribear88 Member

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    Thanks everyone. I will deal with it. The father wants to be 100% involved with the child, so that's a good thing. I would never consider an adoption or having a abortion. I was just having a moment yesterday. My anxiety is up.
     
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  17. Gracia Singh

    Gracia Singh Newbie Supporter

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    We'll all keep you in our prayers. God be with all you guys. Mom, dad, baby.

    Do you presently attend a church or a fellowship?
     
  18. Mel333

    Mel333 Active Member

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    Yay! Not for the anxiety but that you will be supported and have a cutie
     
  19. Endeavourer

    Endeavourer Well-Known Member

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    I know its a shock to weather at the moment, but it's a transitory shock. Soon you will be holding your baby in your arms and before you know it, (s)he'll be 5 and then 15 and you'll be so very grateful to have this precious soul in your life.

    It may help if you keep your thoughts focused on your future instead of on your moment. I'm not saying the moment isn't difficult, but stay calm and stay wise to give your baby a nourishing and safe environment in his/her temporary home.

    You'll be OK. <3

    Are you taking prenatal vitamins? If not, start TOMORROW. Make sure they have folate (in the methylfolate form).

    Hugs,
    E.
     
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