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Same-sex attraction towards my boss

Bonnie77

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I've struggled with same-sex attraction towards other females since I was in grade school. I'm pushing 30 now and it's never gone away. Fortunately I've never acted on it. But I haven't been able to get ride of these thoughts.

I feel like I'm making progress. I'll see an atractive woman and acknowledge her beauty but I won't dwell on it. Especially if it's just a random woman I'll either never see again or a woman I barely know.

However I am having an issue with a woman I do know: my boss. When I first met her I thought she was pretty but I wasn't too distracted. Now that I've gotten to know her I've started to develop quite a crush on her. She's just really nice, fun and charismatic. We have similar interests so we always have things to talk about. She's also kind and considerate. I like my other coworkers but most of them are kind of rude and egotistical. I appreciate my boss's demeanor much more.

Anyways I know nothing could or should happen with my boss. I don't want to be attracted to or involved with women since it is not proper Christian behavior. Plus my boss is straight.

Do you have any advice for me? I'm still trying to find a way to shake my same-sex attraction. It's not good when my boss is trying to talk to me and I'm noticing what pretty eyes she has. Interior thoughts I don't make comments back to her. It's alright if I notice a beautiful woman and quickly move on. My problem is now when I get to know someone and develop an attraction on them as a person (not just from looks).

Thanks for your help.
 

Dave G.

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That seems like a no win proposition all the way around. Your best bet is just don't let your mind wander, except to the cross. Our first love is Jesus and He stated He doesn't want that kind of relationship for man kind. But if you think about it, I'm a married man and I can get attracted to various other women I come in contact with but I don't let it happen. But I do admire their beauty. I have 0 attraction to men in that way. I think women are beautiful and I'm glad to have one of my own. Your situation is somewhat different but not all that much really, nix the festering lust.
 
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HereIStand

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It sounds like you are on the right track. Having same-sex friends is fine. Don't allow yourself to go any further than friendship, and maybe don't be alone with a female friend in a non-public setting. Also, try praying for your boss' salvation or spiritual growth if she is a Christian. That will allow you to see her as more important than a physical object.
 
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LoveNature

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Advice I've heard and taken on (from a video of a young preacher I think) is that whatever is in your heart comes from things you watch, listen to etc. So if you are struggling with lust or sexual sin for example, those things are in your heart because you watch movies with sex scenes or you listen to music that always mentions sex.

I think it's quite common to have a slight crush someone of the same sex but you're definitely not a homosexual if you don't actually have sexual feelings towards that person.

I hope this helps and I'll say a prayer for you :) God bless
 
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SamanthaMathis

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I know that it can be a struggle, for some a daily one. Some have bared the burden since youth, as one ages it may seem pointless. I have friends who were continuously frustrated youth, hoping to know people of the same sex but always weakly resisting. Staying busy has helped, but with certain times of unhappiness or stress people are more likely to "try it". I think you are doing all you can do to avoid giving in to sin, but don't give up, stay the course :)
 
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